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Dear reader,   I am typing this message while rebels lay siege on my client's castle in Amsterdam, the capital of Europe. My client, someone you seem to know mainly as Boo, has asked me to call for your help. He has a very large sum of money that needs to be kept safe while he finds a way to free himself of the clutches of the communists. You seem to be the only person he entrusts with this task. The number we are speaking of is just little over 610.000 EUR which roughly converts to 3.512.000.000 USD, as you may know. There are two reasons why he asked for your help in this:   1. According to DNA tests you are the closest living family member he has. 2. The money was earned by the big success of the OB Podcast, which featured many of you. ¹   I regret to inform you that due to Europe's current regulations, you would only able to give Boo back 1.000 EUR and you will have to keep the rest of the money and do with it as you see fit. Please send me your bank account number, credit card number, access codes, login codes for OtakuBoards, picture of you, picture of you naked, and a picture of your mother via private message on this website. I will transfer the money right away.   Thank you for helping my client out! Have a nice day.   Yours faithfully,   Boo's lawyer     Get it? It's a CON.  Ha.     ¹ Korey hasn't seen a single cent of it, so please do not mention it to him.