Beorhun

[QUOTE=ultimamilz]Alright, we'll start the tournament in just a few minutes, the ref is making a graphic for the tourney. And, here's the order of the fights: Misenki vs. Lord Eliwood [/QUOTE] Alright! Misenki is going down...wait, how does this work? Sorry, this is my first RPG.

[QUOTE=AzureWolf][FONT=Book Antiqua][SIZE=2][COLOR=Blue]I too find the entire concept interesting, with a few nuisances. In fact, the whole modern day aspect seems a little too underdeveloped and trivial: what's the point of the sword losing it's uniqueness in the modern world? I don't get that part. I think you just need a little more work on the basics. That is, you have to create a solid universe, and make sure everything sticks with the reality you have created. Doing one universe is tough enough, so don't get overzealous and add another one just for the sake of it.[/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT][/QUOTE] Well, as I said, this is a very cool idea. Don't start underestimating your story and start throwing in stuff that doesn't need to be there. Don't get rebellious and think the storie's perfect as is, and whatever you do, DON'T GET DISCOURAGED! You really do have something with this, but the idea needs a little work. Keep working on this, Double Edge could end up being legendary, for all we know.

This sounds...kind of...nevermind. Alright. Name: Loki Taneram Gender: Male Race: Fayde Age: 154 Weapon: Dual Pistols, Pike, Spiked gloves Reason for Joining: Unknown Experience: Veteran of several wars on the planet Kothris. Specialty: Demolitions, Traps, Infiltration. History: Loki was born on the planet Kothris, a backwater planet filled with ancient, half-sunken ruins and swamps. Unfortunantly, the Taneram Clan was one of the most hated Fayde clans on the entire planet, so Loki was born into a world of constant fighting where anyone could be killed at any second. So he learned to fight, at a very, very young age. Loki specializes in demolitions, sniping, setting traps, and infiltration. Naturally, Loki is a fairly bitter fayde. Appearance: Loki is about 7'6" tall, with light gray skin covered in scars and cuts, both old and new. He has very luminous eyes with no pupils. He has black face paint on his cheeks and he has long, silvery hair. Because he is a Fayde, he looks fairly young, despite being more than 120 years older than anyone else on the crew. He wears silvery armor that looks very worn out, with some beat up clothing beneath the armor. "By the way, oh captain my captain, you can keep your 'neato toys'. I have all the firepower I need."

While traveling, you are met by a messanger from a nearby city. He asks you many questions about your skills, your weapons, if you are willing to be hired, whatever. Then, after answering his questions, he asks you if you would be willing to help the city of Ramoran. The city was recently sieged by the army of Lathen to the south, and now they face an impending attack from a large army of demons. They have little to no guards, and the city is facing a bout of disease that began in the slums. They need people to lead them, and if you help, you will be paid accordingly. They are currently bracing for the attack, and have formed a small militia, but it won't be enough. The lord sent out a number of messangers and scouts to bring leaders and fighters to defend the city. Do you accept, or will you leave the city to the demons or whatever end is meant for it? Here's my character: Name: Hahno Katenagi Age: 34 Weapon: Katana Gender: Male Class: General Bio: Katenagi lost his left eye during the prior attack on the city, and is still training to fight one-eyed. He has been training to fight with a katana since he was eight. He ran away from his parents when he was very young, around 7, and ended up at the training grounds of Master Rothi. After training for 16 years, Hahno left to see the world, and ended up in Ramoran on the eve of the attack. Appearance: Katenagi has a bloody bandage around his left eye, and he has black hair with a few gray strands. He also has a bit of beard on his face.He wears dark blue samurai armor, but moves surprisingly fast. His fighting style has a lot of finesse and power, and he is accurate, even though he lacks depth perception.

Yeah, I do kind of have to agree with that. I had a problem from day 1 with the whole thing beginning in Modern Day. It kind of emulates a whole lot of other anime, which makes it seem a little ripped off. That's a bad thing, because you have a really cool and unique idea, it just needs some nuances hammered out. Why didn't you keep it like you origianlly had it, with the whole thing starting in a feudal Japanese farm town. Also ,why did you have to go into all of that revealing of the plot? You don't have to tell us everything. Keep some of this quiet. Keep us on edge. You should have told us the characters and not the whole entire story. Like Silver Cyclone said, it kind of ruins everything. Other than that, keep working! You have a pretty cool story on your hands, actually.

Alright, here's my character: Name: Amare Takenawa Age: 26 Gender: Male Weapon: Dual Longswords Race: Human Bio: Amare is a wanderer, a nomad who has spent much of his life wandering between worlds in the pursuit of power. He is a powerful warrior who has spent much of his time training to further his skills with his two swords, dawn and fire. He is a man of great honor, and has never killed unless he had no other option. If he were to ever lose that honor, he couldn't live with himself. With not much else to do, he has decided to enter the Ultima Tournament. Appearance: Amare has wild, black hair, hazel eyes, and runelike tattoos around his right eye. He wears a brown robe with armor under it. He also has a dark green cloak. He is about 6 feet and 3 inches tall. His fighting style is unpredictable, but kind of resembles a mix between Kenshin's fighting and the Prince of Persia's fighting style.