Blayze

[B][SIZE=1]Name: [/SIZE][/B][SIZE=1]Greydon Kreid [B]Age: [/B]89 [B]Gender: [/B]Male [B]Race: [/B]Versilan [B]Loyalty: [/B]Versilan Military - specifically the Elite Specialists and Task Forces [B]Description: [/B]Kreid is of average height, and fairly well-built. His muscle is sinewy, making him seem weaker than he actually is - a slightly smaller body structure is accompanied by unusual strength and agility, making him a fierce opponent in hand-to-hand combat. His jet-black hair falls over his forehead a little, but never strays into his eyes, which, of course, are silver. He has a long, thin scar running from just above his right eyebrow, down to his right cheekbone, from a fight a number of years ago, when he was still in training. As for his clothes, he wears a jet-black version of the standard Versilan military uniform, with red piping at the hems. He has no display of rank or serial number apparent on his person. [B]Weapons: [/B]Kreid carries around a pair of custom KRS-200 series laser pistols. These are weapons which he has been working on to improve their performance for a number of years, and as such they no longer look like military-issue weapons. They are sleek, silver objects, lightweight enough for them not to be a burden when carrying them, but still powerful enough to incapacitate whoever gets hit by the beam. The power cells which the weapons are powered by, while small, are incredibly concentrated, allowing them to last for months at a time without wearing down. Even so, Kreid still makes sure that he has a number of spare power cells with him at all times. [B]Special Skills: [/B]Being a member of the Elite Specialists and Task Forces of the Versilan military, Kreid is an expert in many forms of hand-to-hand combat, his physical strength and agility making him a formidable opponent in any case. He is also incredibly able with firearms, specifically the custom laser pistols he has modified for himself. He has also undergone a great many hours of training which make him able to block out his pain receptors, meaning he can withstand most physical interrogation methods. The final part of his training was to do with stealth and covert ops, and as such Kreid can make himself blend into almost any setting, whether he is blending into a crowd or infiltrating any form of high-security facility. [B]Personality: [/B]Kreid is somewhat of an enigma. He is totally dedicated to his cause - he is a true believer in what he is meant to do - and yet, he knows that he cannot exist in the universe he is attempting to create. What he does makes him evil in his own eyes, but he does it anyway because he has no illusions that it is the right thing for the rest of the universe. [B]Short Bio: [/B]Greydon Kreid is one of the top covert operatives in the Versilan military, thus he has been enlisted by the Council to infiltrate the Resistance and attempt to bring it down from the inside. He has no rank or serial number, and it is quite possible that Greydon Kreid is a false alias, and as such it is near-on impossible to find out anything real about him - he is not listed on the Versilan military database. He is currently underground in sector 9, beginning his infiltration of the Resistance movement. He poses as a low-ranking member of the Versilan military, who grew wary of the Empire's motives and joined the Resistance, feeding them what little information he could from the flagship [I]Creator[/I]. However, he claims he was found to be a member of the Resistance, but fled before he could be apprehended and put to trial. He has managed to blend in with the other Resistance members thus far, and has most people believing his story. There are a few people who are still somewhat wary of him, but he knows that he can bring them around soon enough... [/SIZE]

[B][I][SIZE=1]"He's truly our finest specimen. The combination of genetic and cybernetic modification that was implemented in his creation was a flawless first example. He is stronger, faster, and more intelligent than the average human, and he is programmed to take any command, no matter how dangerous or life-threatening. Ladies and gentlemen, I introduce you to the ultimate super-soldier." [/SIZE][/I][/B][I][SIZE=1]I heard the voices through a thick mist of static-like sound, a buzzing that wouldn't stop, wouldn't let up, not even for a second. I tried to see, but there was nothing but blurred colours and shapes. It was as though I had woken up for the very first time. [B]"Of course, we wiped his memory totally. He has no recollection whatsoever of the life he led before he was entered into the project, and if our programming has gone correctly, then he will have no wish to remember either. We have taken his true name and wiped it from all files and records, and simply replaced it with one of our own. His name is Kessel." [/B]The shapes began to take clearer form, swirling into solid images before my eyes - a man in a white coat stood at the front of a large group of others, dressed in business suits, one even in a military uniform. The scientist at the front held a clipboard, on which were written the answers to any question the group might ask. [B]"What happens if he turns on us? If he's the "Ultimate Super Soldier" you claim he is, won't he cause a lot of damage to our own side?" [/B]asked the man in the military uniform. [B]"Kessel is not really a human any more, General. He is...a machine, a weapon. He has been programmed to take orders, and never to disobey them. There is no danger whatsoever of him turning on you." "But this mental conditioning...it breaks down sometimes, doesn't it?" "There have been tests that confirm that only those of unsound mind before the conditioning process begins are able to break down the programming. Kessel was of totally sound mind before he was entered into the programme, therefore there is no danger." [/B]Kessel...the name didn't sound familiar...I knew it wasn't my name. I looked desperately around his surroundings, and saw the reason why my vision had been blurry when I had first regained consciousness - I was submerged in a huge tank of liquid, with any number of wires, cables and tubes connected to my body. [B]"Ah, as you can see, he is beginning to stir," [/B]said the scientist, very matter-of-factly, [B]"This is the first time he has been conscious since the enhancement process began, so it should be interesting to see his reaction." "What is the liquid he's suspended in?" [/B]asked one of the women in a business suit. [B]"It's a muscle enhancer. He has essentially been asleep for a number of months, and as such there has been some atrophy in his muscles. This solution will build them up again. It's quite oxygen-enriched, so he doesn't even need to breathe in there, and there are no chemicals in it which would affect his eyes, not in any long-term way, anyway." [/B]I grabbed one of the tubes that was connected to my chest, and yanked on it with both hands. [B]"Is he supposed to be doing that?" [/B]asked another business-suited woman, [B]"It doesn't look like a natural reaction." "He is working out how to disconnect himself. It's perfectly fine, he doesn't have any specific need to be connected to the life-support at this stage, anyway. It's a healthy process of him gaining independence." [/B]I ripped each tube, wire and cable from myself, then floated over to the glass, pressing my hand against it. The liquid flowed around me, bizarrely like jelly in it's consistency, and I looked down on the people who stared at me like I was some kind of zoo animal. Some looked on, fascinated; others took a step back; and the scientist stared directly into my eyes, as if he was goading me. I felt rage coursing through my veins at this stage, and drew my fist back, then let if fly at the glass tank that surrounded me... [/SIZE][/I][SIZE=1]Kessel snapped into consciousness with a cry, his hand thrusting forwards and snapping around something in the dark. He looked up, his vision slowly clearing, and saw a beautiful young lady's throat clasped in his hand. He looked into her deep blue eyes, and croaked: [B]"Who are you and where am I?"[/B] [/SIZE]

[B][SIZE=1]"Are you scared of me, Elena de Mercado?" [/SIZE][/B][SIZE=1]Kessel asked quietly, [B]"Because there is no need to be. I rarely kill in a bar-room brawl - this was an unfortunate exception to my own personal rules. He breached the code of conduct, and those who do this must pay the price." "But you like killing like this, don't you, Kessel?" [/B]Elena replied, [B]"You feel it makes you...dominant." [/B]Kessel smiled. This girl was a thing of incredible beauty and grace - not that he was interested, though. He had grown weary of such immature desires a long time ago - he only participated in sexual situations to gain that feeling of dominance over another person which he craved so much. [B]"You are very intuitive, Miss de Mercado," [/B]the psychotic killing machine replied, pulling a cigarette from his shirt pocket and twisting it into the corner of his mouth, [B]"Every human feels the need to be dominant. Some hide it from others. I choose to exhibit it plainly - it is a much healthier outlet than, say, taking it out on another away from public eyes. You should try it sometime." [/B]Elena flicked open her own Zippo lighter and held it under Kessel's cigarette tip, sparking it and listening to the soft crackle as the tobacco caught. [B]"Thank you," [/B]Kessel said, leaning back and drawing in a lungful of smoke. [B]"That's going to kill you eventually," [/B]she said, looking down at the bar and wiping it a little with a rag. [B]"Miss de Mercado, please," [/B]said Kessel with a slight chuckle, [B]"Of all the things likely to be the end of me, cigarettes are rather low on the list. There are about a hundred waiting just down the street, in fact." "The protest?" [/B]Elena asked, and Kessel nodded. [B]"The people of Septu aren't all that happy about having one of the world's most wanted criminals residing just around the corner from them. They have no idea whether I'm going to sneak around at night and murder their children, or just destroy their city from the inside out. Totally understandably, of course," [/B]he replied, giving Elena a sly grin through the cloud of smoke that was puffing out of his mouth and nose. Elena then jumped as he burst into a fit of coughing and spluttering, which turned slowly into dry retching as he doubled over and almost collapsed from his seat. He dropped the cigarette on the ground, closed his eyes and took in a few deep breaths of fresh air. [B]"I apologise," [/B]he croaked, sitting back up straight and facing Elena, [B]"I have a certain...intolerance to noxious fumes." "And you continue to smoke cigarettes? Seems a little foolish to me, Kessel," [/B]she said with a comforting smile. [B]"It never hurts to be reminded of one's own weaknesses. Helps us to overcome them - anyway, my intolerance seems to be breaking down. I never used to be able to inhale this much smoke and remain conscious, so it seems that if I continue to smoke as I have been doing, perhaps the intolerance will dissipate completely." "Seems like convoluted logic to me, but if you believe then maybe that's all you need..." [/B]Elena was interrupted by a sudden crash as the window of her bar was shattered, and a small glass object landed on the ground, promptly exploding into a shower of dark liquid and flames. [B]"Petrol bomb!" [/B]someone yelled as the flames began to catch, [B]"This protest just got a little nasty!" "Quick, Kessel," [/B]said Elena under her breath, [B]"There is a back way out. Go, before the smoke gets to you." [/B]Kessel looked a little puzzled for just a second, then ran over to the back door, never questioning Elena's motives. He ripped the door from it's hinges and leapt out of the doorway into the alley behind the bar. He turned just as the flames hit the stores of liquor, and the whole place went up. He just managed to swing the door in front of him and shield himself from the worst of the blast, smoke and flames pouring out around him. He hit the floor, and blacked out almost instantly... [/SIZE]

[B][SIZE=1]"The fuck do these assholes want from us?" [/SIZE][/B][SIZE=1]yelled one of the men who had taken up the majority of the space in the small cafe just off the town square, [B]"Criminals gotta live somewhere, may as well be out here in the sticks. Their country's shitty enough as is - we don't make it no worse." "They want us out of their country," [/B]said a shadow-cloaked figure from the corner of the room, [B]"They want us out of their towns, their cities, their lives, because we are, one and all, evil men. Evil has no true place in this world, but if our place is to be here, then so be it." "Oh yeah?" [/B]said the petty thug, striding over to the cloud of tobacco smoke in the corner, [B]"Well I don't give two shits if they want us out. We're here, and we got as much right as anybody to be here." "We have no right to be here. We simply...are. Now tell me, friend. What is your name?" "I'm Jacobi Tyler, just released into the wild from the State Pen in Arizona. And who might you be?" "Me? I am the Antichrist. I am evil incarnate. I am that shadow you see in your dreams that makes you wake up soaked in sweat. But my name...my name is Kessel." "Wait...Kessel? You're [I]the [/I]Kessel? The one who murdered his way through an entire town in Italy?" "Ah, I see my unfortunate infamy precedes me. And I didn't murder my way through an [I]entire [/I]Italian town - most of those people committed suicide before I got to them. After they'd seen the first few deaths, that is." "Well, I don't want any trouble, buddy," [/B]said Tyler, backing nervously away, [B]"I just wanna have a drink." "Well, unfortunately for you, Jacobi Tyler," [/B]said Kessel calmly, getting slowly to his feet and pulling a pair of black leather gloves on, simultaneously dropping his cigarette butt to the ground and crushing it under the heel of his tattered prison-issue boot, [B]"You have already initiated combat, by standard Posopian rules. You have engaged me in a threatening manner, and therefore we must...duel." "You're...you're kidding, right?" [/B]stammered Tyler, [B]"I didn't mean anything by it. I was just talkin'." "Well, it's not up to me to decide, is it? Now tell, me, Jacobi Tyler, have you ever wondered what your own heart looks like?" [/B]The man moved, quick as a flash, and as Jacobi looked down, he saw the man's arm buried up to the wrist in his own chest, crimson gouts spurting across the cafe, splattering across Kessel's gnarled, but smiling face. [B]"Can you feel it, Jacobi? The central organ of your body, slowly dying away to nothing? Does it feel strange?" [/B]The man, of course, could not answer, but simply coughed and spluttered, blood dribbling from between his lips, and finally he slipped away, Kessel feeling the organ pulse it's last beat. He withdrew his hand, peeled the glove off and threw it to the floor with a wet slap. [B]"Disappointing. I thought he'd at least survive to see the organ for himself," [/B]the psychopath muttered to himself. [B]"Impressive," [/B]said a voice from across the cafe's table, [B]"You wouldn't think someone with such strength and...let's face it, insanity, would be so well-spoken." [/B]Kessel looked across the table through the haze of darkness and cigarette smoke to see the figure who had spoken... --- ooc: That figure can be anyone who fancies a chat with a psychopath! [/SIZE]

[SIZE=1]I don't mind who I'm teamed with - I'm sure I could make just as good a story teamed with Gavin as I could with Kei. I'm assuming that if I'm doing this story that Raiha suggested on Lindsey Lohan and Bigfoot then we'd be heading to Hollywood? Or does anybody else know where Lindsey Lohan actually lives? I'll post as soon as I know who I'm being teamed with. [/SIZE]

[center][SIZE=1][U][B]Septu Criminal Profile [/B][/U][B][URL="http://news.bbc.co.uk/media/images/40062000/jpg/_40062917_kbgallery_premiere10ap.jpg"]Prisoner #265/4[/URL] [/B][click for surveillance image] [B]Name: [/B]Kessel [no last name given] [B]Age: [/B]appears to be early thirties - biological age could be vastly different to this. Require full medical report. [B]Gender: [/B]Male [B]Species: [/B]Outwardly, Kessel appears to be a human, but a medical outline shows that this is far from the truth. He was one of the first genetically-enhanced biosoldiers to come from the labs in Canada, but after the modification was complete, he was transferred to his home country of Britain to be fitted with cybernetic implants. The reasons given for this cross-modification was that the genetic technique had not been mastered at the stage of his modification. The creators felt that it would be prudent to add in additional improvements. As such, his strength is far in advance of any ordinary human, as are his agility, speed, and reflexes. His left arm is almost totally cybernetic, allowing him to interface with almost any computer system, as well as granting his left arm extreme strength. His right eye is similarly totally cybernetic, allowing a number of different types of scope to become part of his arsenal. Infra-red, night vision, telescopic zoom and X-Ray are just a few of the scopes he can utilise. [B]Origin: [/B]Born in Britain, Kessel moved to Canada at a young age, and was discovered as a prime candidate for the genetic enhancement programme. He underwent extensive genetic modification for almost ten years, before he was transferred back to Britain for his cybernetic enhancements. [B]Past Occupations: [/B]Kessel was one of a kind, enhanced by the government for the government. He was the very first of the covert-ops specialists to be created by the British Empire - using black-ops relations with Canada in order to complete the genetic enhancements necessary. He was engineered and trained to be the ultimate in black-ops soldiers, stealthy and deadly, with no need to question orders, and no mercy when it came to dispatching enemies. But he went AWOL [see Psychological Profile for details], and rampaged for a number of months before we were finally able to contain him. [B]Special Skills: [/B]As stated above, Kessel is extremely strong, more so in his cybernetic left arm than anywhere else, but still stronger than any human elsewhere. He is also more agile, faster and with better reflexes than humans should have. His right eye [also cybernetic] contains a large quantity of high-tech equipment, including a small laser [only good for cutting through thin metal - restrain him with thick enough shackles and this shouldn't cause any problems], and a number of different visual scopes. He has also been trained to become a deadly opponent with any number of different weapons - from crossbows to nunchaku to high-power rifles. The one drawback to his design is that both his right eye and his left arm can be shut off totally with the application of electricity [suggest that this would be prudent when containing prisoner]. A flaw with his genetic enhancement also means that his lungs are more susceptible to damage from toxic chemicals - should he breathe in smoke or any other kind of fumes, he will be incapacitated for a few minutes while his body removes the fumes. [B]Psychological Profile: [/B]Kessel is a soldier, by nature, as it is all he has known in life. His memories of the five years before he was transferred to Canada for his genetic enhancement have all been wiped, although he claims to have shards, fragments of them flash back to him every so often. Whether this is true or just a cry for attention is unknown - however it is suggested that this is kept a close eye on in future. He is a perfect soldier, programmed not to ask any questions, to follow orders to the letter, and not to show any mercy whatsoever when he kills. However, there is one problem with Kessel's psychological make-up, and this is that he has become a psychopath. He is not a madman, not a feral beast who rips his "prey" apart, far from it. He is clever, far too clever, and takes an insane kind of joy in torturing others - but not physically. Kessel has, recently, become a man who will torment other human beings until their minds break down, leaving them begging to be killed - and then he grants them their final wish, in the most horrific and brutal fashions imaginable. Kessel is not only dangerous, insane and psychopathic, but he is also cool, calm and collected, up until the moment of the kill, when the bloodlust sets in. He should be treated with extreme caution, and I mean extreme. [Psychological Profile written by Dr H. Neric Pryor] [B]Criminal Record: [/B]Desertion of the British Armed Forces [1 count] Criminal Damage [18 counts] Burglary [1 count] Armed Robbery [5 counts] Battery [4 counts] ABH [8 counts] GBH [6 counts] Kidnapping [2 counts] Attempted Rape [1 count] Murder [31 counts] [B]WARNING: THIS PRISONER IS EXTREMELY DANGEROUS - SUGGESTED THAT HE SHOULD BE TRANSPORTED UNDER HEAVY SEDATION EXERCISE EXTREME CAUTION [/B][/SIZE][/center]

[SIZE=1]Because I suddenly suffered from an attack of intense retardation when purchasing the Dresden Files books, I managed to read Dead Beat first, followed by Fool Moon, then Storm Front, and then Grave Peril and Summer Knight in the correct order. I've also bought Blood Rites, Death Masks and Proven Guilty, but haven't as yet read them. However, thus far I would have to agree with you in that my favourite character is Bob the Skull. He always manages to bring an element of dry wit into any situation he is put into. The obsession with cheap romance novels is quite a nice touch as well. Also, not only is he a 400-year-old sex fiend/voyeur, he is also able to possess Harry's cat whenever he needs to wander around. Brilliant stuff. I haven't seen much of the series, but the one thing that immediately irritated me was the lack of the Blue Beetle - replaced, as it was, with an ex-military Jeep, a poor substitute for the good old VW Beetle. The young, hot, Asian Ancient Mai was a high point for me as well, though, and Morgan seemed to be less of a total arsehole in the series. One of the best bits in the books, for my money, was when Harry brought a T-Rex skeleton to life and rampaged through Chicago on it's back - culminating in the T-Rex skeleton eating a ghoul. Sounds tasty. [/SIZE]

[I][SIZE=1]Half an hour earlier... [/SIZE][/I][SIZE=1]Alex strolled through the glass double doors of the WWN Head Office and into the lobby, chugging back a can of Dr. Pepper as he walked. [B]"You know that stuff is bad for you, Alex," [/B]said the pretty blonde receptionist sitting behind the desk with a gleaming white smile. He winked back, shifted his bag a little higher onto his shoulder and said: [B]"Might be bad for my health, but nothing can stand in the way of true love, and I do love Dr. Pepper." [/B]She smiled, and Alex walked past, slamming the can down into the bin by the desk, and headed to the elevators. Alex was always glad of his "cute" British accent over here in the states - it always gave him a starting point to talk to women in bars, and gave the receptionist good reason to flirt with him. He smiled quietly to himself as he hit the button for his floor. --- Half an hour later, Alex and Eowyn headed to the boardroom. Secretly, Alex always felt a little intimidated by the elder woman, knowing that she had far more experience than him, and realistically it should be her sitting in his chair. Even if she was named after a character from Lord of the Rings. They passed by Loren Fignon's office on the way to the boardroom, and Alex peeked in through the tiny gap between the bottom of the blinds and the windowsill. [B]"Uhoh," [/B]he said, [B]"Looks like Fignon's chewing out some poor intern or something, as per." "New addition?" [/B]asked Eowyn. [B]"Not on photography," [/B]said Alex, [B]"I would have gotten a memo. Maybe he's a new reporter. He had that kind of "Peter Parker" look to him." "You can't compare every new member of the team to Peter Parker, Alexander." "I don't!" [/B]protested the head photographer, [B]"Sometimes I compare them to Clark Kent." [/B]The pair continued their playful banter until they met a man in a trenchcoat in the middle of the corridor, whispering into a tape recorder. [B]"Alright, Morris?" [/B]asked Alex with a nod, [B]"Still not mastered that serum, then?" "Sshh," [/B]spluttered the man, [B]"I'm taking important notes." "Well...keep up the good work," [/B]said Eowyn, and the two photographers side-stepped him, Alex making the universal sign for craziness behind his back, looping his index finger around his ear, for which he got a gentle slap from Eowyn. [B]"Don't hit your superior," [/B]he said dryly, but with a tiny smile. People always said that Alex was a good boss - he didn't take his "superiority" too seriously, and was always up for a joke. As soon as the pair pushed the double doors of the boardroom open, they were greeted by the hustle and bustle of the entire Weekly World News Team, minus Fignon herself. Reporters, photographers, researchers, they were all there, including Spence Fulbrook, the freelance reporter, and a young intern, John something...maybe Jake? [B]"Good morning, team," [/B]said Alex, sitting down in his usual swivel chair and slapping his folder on the desk, before leaning back and placing his feet up on the boardroom table. [B]"What mischief are we going to get up to today?"[/B] [/SIZE]

[B][SIZE=1]Name: [/SIZE][/B][SIZE=1]Alexander "Alex" Mason [B]Age: [/B]27 [B]Profession: [/B]Head Photographer [B]Area(s) of Expertise: [/B]Cryptozoology, UFOs [B]Physical Description: [/B]Alex is an often scruffy-looking character, usually unshaven (he shaves every couple of days, but it just seems to grow back at an alarming rate), with light brown hair messed into short, tousled spikes. His eyes are very light blue, but his pupils are often somewhat larger than normal, perhaps due to a lack of sleep. He dresses in a smart-casual style, usually opting for wearing a t-shirt and jeans with a suit jacket (his dark-grey pinstriped one is his favourite), and his preferred shoes are a battered pair of black-and-white Converse All-Stars (easy for running after potential shots). [B]Brief History and Personality Description: [/B]His whole life, Alex has been interested in the existence of Bigfoot, the Loch Ness Monster and all those other so-called "mythical" animals. He used to study information about them on the internet for hours, becoming convinced that they did truly exist. His other passion was photography, and the two seemed to collide rather happily (if a little coincidentally) when the Editor of the Weekly World News saw an article where all photography had been done by him in his college newspaper. The Editor was impressed, and hired him immediately - he has now become a well-known face around the office, having been part of the team for almost ten years now. He is also one of the top Photographers on the team, able to get a shot of anything from anywhere. Alex is a relaxed, laid-back character, but when the opportunity for one great picture comes around, he will do anything to get it, and that means [I]anything. [/I]However, aside from his occasional outbursts, he is usually good-tempered and well-liked by the rest of his team. [/SIZE]

[SIZE=1]I shouldn't think a posting order will be necessary in the long episodes - I mean, if the writer of said episode thinks it would be a good idea, then by all means they can implement one, but I don't see it as a necessity. Don't worry about this weekend - I'm going to be out of action for most of it, really so it shouldn't be too much of a big deal. Anyway, it's Ozy's episode!I look forward to it. [/SIZE]

[SIZE=1]Someone phones Admiral Car Insurance Company every 7 seconds. What a nutter. Sorry, that one was just to break the ice a little. I have plenty more where that came from though: [B]What do you tell a woman with two black eyes?[/B] Nothing - you already told the ***** twice [B]What do you call a woman with one black eye?[/B] Quick learner Do I dare go into the dead baby jokes? Yes. Yes I do. [B]What sits in the corner getting smaller and smaller?[/B] Baby with a cheese grater (similar to the earlier one about the nun, I know) [B] What's blue and orange and lies at the bottom of a swimming pool?[/B] Baby with deflated armbands [B]What's red and silver and runs into walls? [/B]Baby with forks in it's eyes [B]What's green and silver and lies on the floor? [/B]Same baby three weeks later Another fairly sick joke: [B]What's better than winning the paralympics? [/B]Having legs And now some nice clean musician jokes: [B]What's got three legs and a penis on top? [/B]Drum stool [B]How can you tell when there's a drummer at the door? [/B]The knock speeds up [B]How can you tell when there's a lead vocalist at the door? [/B]He can't find the key and doesn't know when to come in [B]How can you tell when there's a trombonist at the door? [/B]His hat says "Pizza Delivery" [B]What's a bassoon good for? [/B]Firewood [B]What's an oboe good for? [/B]Lighting a bassoon And one of those long ones: Three men get stranded on a desert island, and get captured by a tribe of cannibals. The cannibals take the guys back to their camp, and say: [B]"You must each go out into the jungle and find five of the same fruits. Then you must come back here." [/B]So the men go into the jungle, and soon enough the first one comes back with five apples in his arms. So the cannibals come over to him and say: [B]"Now you must shove all five apples up your rear end. If you do not manage it, we will kill you and eat you." [/B]The man tries, but doesn't even manage one. The cannibals kill him and eat him. Soon after, the second man comes back with five grapes. The cannibals say: [B]"You must shove all five grapes up your rear end. If you do not manage it, we will kill you and eat you." [/B]The second man begins this challenge, and manages to shove four grapes up himself before he starts laughing like a madman and falls onto the floor, losing the last grape. The cannibals then kill him and eat him too. Up at the pearly gates, the second man meets the first, who asks him: [B]"You were so close! You almost got all five grapes up there, but then you failed at the last moment. Why did you start laughing like that?" [/B]To which the second man replies: [B]"I just saw the third guy coming back to the camp with five pineapples." [/B]Haha, jokes all round. I couldn't think of a more pleasant way of saying "shoving fruit up your arse," so I had to resort to calling it the "rear end." Finally, the piece de resistance: [/SIZE][B][SIZE=1]Why did the scarecrow win the Nobel Prize? [/SIZE][/B][SIZE=1]He was outstanding in his field! Whoah, that's a lot of jokes... [/SIZE]

[SIZE=1]Well, the two-part episodes aren't really two-part any more. I decided that it would be far too complicated having two different people write different parts of the same story, so I thought it would be much easier just to have one person write an episode that is twice as long. And, in answer to your question, episodes 3 (written by Ozy), 5 (written by yourself), 7 and 10 (both written by me) will be the long episodes. So Ozy's first will be a long one, and your next one will also be long. If any of that is bad timing for you just let me know and I'll try and fiddle with the order a little. Hope this helps! [/SIZE]

[B][SIZE=1]"Do you have any form of grasp of genetic science, Doctor?" [/SIZE][/B][SIZE=1]asked Adrian, never looking up from the console he was working at. [B]"I have some, yeah," [/B]sighed the Doctor, [B]"I made a pig-man human once. Helped two races combine their DNA, almost at the cost of both of them. But you've been cloning humans here, see, and that's fantastic." "We've been doing it for years now," [/B]said Adrian, [B]"Ever since the colony first formed, almost. The number of settlers was pitifully small, and the breeding rate wasn't nearly high enough, so we perfected the cloning technique one of the original settlers had begun to research, and began to build a colony. But the colony was plagued by the same problems the human race had faced on Earth - war, violence, crime. So we eliminated the need for any of these from the genome." "Wait," [/B]said the Doctor, holding his hand up, [B]"You haven't been making pure clones? You've been...fiddling around with the human genome to try and make a "better" race? That's a dangerous path you're heading down, Adrian. I know a man who tried that once, and he became a monster." "But don't you agree that this society is perfect? No need for crime, no need for violence, aggression." "But soon you'll be saying there's no need for passion - it only leads to aggression. And from there you'll be wanting to eliminate love because love can only lead to passion, and passion can only lead to violence. You're removing everything about yourselves that makes you human." "Then maybe it is right that we should no longer be human," [/B]replied Adrian, finally looking up from the work station, [B]"Maybe we are destined to become something...better." "Have you ever heard of a race called the Daleks, Adrian?" [/B]asked the Doctor, moving towards Adrian now, [B]"Hmm? No? Well, let me tell you about them. They were a peaceful race, they never wanted to do any harm to anyone. But then a genius, a madman, decided he didn't want them to be peaceful, he wanted them to be an army. So he began fiddling with their DNA coding, removing everything he didn't want until he was left with all that he wanted. Mutants, obsessed with war, beings who almost succeeded in wiping out half the universe. But now there's only one left, Adrian, because they destroyed themselves, trying to be something that they weren't. And you're heading down the exact same path with these clones." "We are not like these...Daleks you speak of, Doctor. We are creating a peaceful society, one where no anger destroys lives, ends families. Isn't that what all humans want, Doctor?" "Oh no. All humans want is to be human, secure in their own existence. Humans are just tiny creatures, caught in a universe far too big for them, and they are just trying to get by. They have no need for "perfect" civilisations, and they don't try to reach them by taking away what it is to be human." [/B]At this tirade, the door whooshed open and Dani walked in, scratching his head. [B]"Dani, we're leaving," [/B]said the Doctor, storming out of the room, [B]"These people are beyond our help." "But, Doctor!" [/B]called Dani, rushing along the corridor after him, [B]"There was something I needed to ask you. In private." [/B]The Doctor looked around uncomfortably, but then caved. [B]"Alright. But quickly, mind." [/B]He led Dani into a side room, and closed the door, [B]"So what is it?" "What are you doing here?" [/B]he asked, [B]"Why have you come here?" "We came together, Dani," [/B]replied the Doctor, a little puzzled, [B]"Remember? In the TARDIS? Big blue box? Not ringing any bells?" "Not really. Maybe this will help," [/B]he said, jabbing something into the side of the Doctor's neck. [B]"Ow! What was that?" [/B]cried the Doctor, rubbing the side of his neck. He looked down at what Dani was holding. Tranquiliser... He hit the floor. --- The Doctor forced his eyes open, and saw Dani staring down at him, his mouth moving, but the Doctor couldn't hear a word he was saying. Eventually the fuzz cleared, and words came to him. [B]"Are you alright, Doctor?" [/B]Dani was asking, [B]"They hit you with the same stuff they hit me with - must'a been a stronger dose, though - you were out the whole time you were on the table." "The table? What? Where are we?" [/B]the Doctor slurred, his mind moving too quickly for his mouth. [B]"Some kind'a holding cell, I'd guess," [/B]Dani shrugged, [B]"Stuck me in here after they got me off the table." "What's going on here? Why have I been on a table?" "Oh, they cloned us," [/B]said Dani, [B]"Sent my clone after you - now they've cloned you too. Said somethin' about keeping them alive for a few years." "No," [/B]said the Doctor, getting to his feet, [B]"They can't have cloned me. That means...they have my DNA." "Yeah, that's basically what I'm getting at," [/B]replied Dani a little sarcastically. [B]"No, Dani, you don't understand how much damage my DNA could do in the wrong hands," [/B]said the Doctor, searching around the walls for a door or some kind of opening, [B]"I'm different to you - if they get my DNA then...who knows what they could do with it." [/B]The door whooshed open, and in stepped three figures. The first was Tarina, the girl from earlier, or at least a clone of her. The second was the clone of Dani. The third...well, the Doctor knew what it was going to be, but he was still dreading it. He saw himself walk through the door, dressed in exactly the same clothes, even down to the bright blue socks. The Doctor, the real one that is, sank down into a nearby chair. [B]"Hello, Doctor," [/B]said Tarina with a smug grin. --- ooc: [I]hope this is all ok for you, Vicky - let me know if not and I'll change it. Otherwise, go ahead and end the episode![/I] [/SIZE]

[center][SIZE=3][U][B]The TARDIS Doctor Who Underground [/B][/U][/SIZE][SIZE=1][SIZE=2][U][B]Characters [/B][/U][/SIZE][/SIZE] [center][SIZE=1][B]The Doctor: [/B]The last surviving Time Lord and a wanderer, the Doctor travels with various Companions, and intervenes in the crises he comes across. He is almost a thousand years old, and on his tenth (out of twelve) regenerations. Currently travelling with Dani Posner. [I]played by Blayze[/I] [B]Dani Posner: [/B]A rebellious young computer wizard from London, Dani has been researching the Doctor for many years, but he never in his wildest dreams thought that he would one day become the Doctor's newest Companion. [I]played by Vicky[/I][/SIZE][/center] [SIZE=3][U][B] [SIZE=2]Episodes [/SIZE][/B][/U][B][SIZE=2][SIZE=1]Episode One: [/SIZE][/SIZE][/B][SIZE=2][SIZE=1]Leeches The Doctor arrives on planet Earth in search of a new companion, and finds Dani Posner, a young computer wizard who is being attacked by something from his computer. The Doctor tracks the signal to Tower Bridge and within finds the slumbering Vordraxis, an alien race of "mind-vampires," whom he wakens and sends off to a new homeworld. He then takes Dani in the TARDIS as his new companion. [I]written by Blayze[/I] [B]Episode Two: [/B]Masterpiece Society [/SIZE][/SIZE][/SIZE][SIZE=1] The Doctor and Dani arrive on Koschei III in 2204, one of Earth's longest surviving colonies for over a thousand years and a civilisation built entirely out of genetically enhanced human clones for the perfect, peaceful, masterpiece society. But the colonists are suffering from genetic disorders brought on by thousand of years of cloning and seem more than interested in fresh samples of DNA. After being cloned themselves, the Doctor and Dani manage to shut down the computer system, leaving the new-born clones at the level of infants. [I]written by Vicky [/I][B][U][SIZE=2]Races Encountered [/SIZE][/U][SIZE=2][SIZE=1]The Vordraxis: [/SIZE][/SIZE][/B][SIZE=2][SIZE=1]a race of "mind-vampires," who gain sustenance from psychic energy emitted from the minds of all sentient beings. They were long thought to be extinct, however the Doctor recently uncovered a small nest of them at the top of Tower Bridge, and sent them to a new homeworld to start afresh. [I]encountered in Episode One: Leeches [/I][B]Human Clones: [/B]genetically enhanced life-forms made from the DNA coding of pre-existing humans, created by a human colony on Koschei III. However, they were suffering from a number of genetic disorders, and eventually the Doctor shut down all means of cloning, to allow those already created to live their own lives. [I]encountered in Episode Two: Masterpiece Society[/I] [/SIZE][/SIZE][SIZE=2][SIZE=1]I will add to this first post as the story progresses. Any questions, suggestions or other enquiries should be directed here. However, when it is your turn to write an episode, please continue to PM me with the synopsis and I will edit it into this post. Enjoy! [/SIZE][/SIZE][/SIZE][/center]

[SIZE=1]The Doctor ran down a little flight of steps at the base of one of the Bridge's towers, and found a steel door at the bottom. He whipped out his sonic screwdriver again and aimed it at the door. It buzzed and the door clunked open. He looked up at Dani, gave a broad grin, and pushed the door open. [B]"Come on," [/B]he said, and ran through the door, taking the steps inside two at a time. Dani followed, more slowly, but nonetheless he followed. The Doctor's coat flapped out behind him as he ran, his Converse slapping on the steps. [I]Aliens in London, [/I]he thought, [I]Last time that happened, I was here with...Martha... [/I]He shook his head and blinked his eyes as he reached the door at the top of the tower. Dani reached the top of the stairs a few seconds after him, thoroughly puffed out. [B]"How do you run...so fast?" [/B]he gasped. The Doctor shrugged. [B]"I get a lot of practice. Been running all my life, really," [/B]he looked at the wall opposite him, and Dani got the distinct impression he was wandering down memory lane. [B]"You were in such a hurry to get up here, there's no point messin' about now we're here. So, you gonna open that door?" "What? Yes, sorry," [/B]mumbled the Doctor, shaking his head and turning to the door with his sonic screwdriver. It buzzed, but nothing happened. [B]"What's wrong?" [/B]asked Dani, [B]"Why can't you open it?" "It's a deadbolt seal. The one thing that can withstand the power of the sonic screwdriver." "So we can't get in?" "Oh, there's always the old-fashioned way," [/B]said the Doctor, [B]"We knock." [/B]He rapped three times on the door with his knuckles, and it swung open. He stepped out into a small room, dark and dank, water dripping from the ceiling. He stepped in and looked all around, from left to right, up and down. [B]"Well, I think we've found what was doing this to you," [/B]he said, moving forward to let Dani in, [B]"Look up there." [/B]Dani looked up and saw what the Doctor had seen. There were a dozen vaguely humanoid creatures, hanging upside down from the rafters, their bodies covered by strange, cocoon-type structures. As Dani took a closer look, they had one single eye in the centre of their foreheads, bright crimson skin, and a number of claws on their hands and feet, the latter digging deep into the rafters, holding them aloft. They all had their eyes closed, and appeared to be sleeping. [B]"Vordraxis," [/B]whispered the Doctor, [B]"But how are they connecting with you?" [/B]He moved over to the corner of the room, where there was a torch, presumably left by workmen who had been up here, and flicked it on, shining it up at the hanging Vordraxis. Dani saw as the light flashed on them, they all had long electrical cables plugged into their cocoons, which laced around the ceiling like a spider's web, and all connected over in the corner where the Doctor was standing. [B]"Doctor," [/B]Dani called, [B]"I think they might be connected to something where you are. Have a look around." [/B]The Doctor turned around and found a computer monitor sitting right behind him, one which he hadn't seen in the darkness. [B]"Oh, this can't be what I think it is," [/B]said the Doctor, tapping the screen with a finger. It lit up, and on it was a number of pictures of human faces - passport photos, most likely, [B]"It is! Oh, that's fantastic!" "What is? What are they doing?" "The Vordraxis are like...they're like mind vampires. They feed off psychic energy - everyone gives it off, some people give it off stronger than others - but they were supposed to have died out years ago. But someone installed them on Earth, someone put a number of infant Vordraxis here, right here in Tower Bridge, must have been years ago. They've been in suspended animation here ever since, just hanging there in mid-air, waiting to reach adulthood. But they needed sustenance - the Vordraxis die if they run out of psychic energy to live on. So whoever installed them here connected them to the internet. Their self-preservation instinct forces them to absorb the nearest source of psychic energy, even when they're in hibernation like this." "So what does that have to do with the internet?" "Don't you see? The Vordraxis are connected to the internet, and they're absorbing the psychic energy of people who are using the internet - and they're starting with the most intelligent people!" "So I'm one of the most intelligent people on the planet?" [/B]asked Dani expectantly. [B]"Well, they've been feeding off various people for almost a decade - about a hundred people a week. So you're not quite, I'm afraid, Dani-boy!" "So how are we gonna kill 'em?" "Kill them? No-one said anything about killing them. In fact, I'm going to give them life!" [/B]The Doctor began unplugging various cables, and fixed them to the computer monitor. He then sat down in front of it, and aimed his sonic screwdriver at it. [B]"Whatever happens, Dani, don't unplug me." [/B]The Doctor smiled and activated the sonic screwdriver. The screen immediately burst into life, a tendril of energy the same as the one which had attacked Dani flicking out and hitting the Doctor between the eyes, which went blank as he began to spasm, the tendril turning pink as it had done in Dani's apartment. Energy began to flow through the room, the light turning from pink to crimson, and Dani had to shield his eyes as it got brighter. The Doctor seemed to be screaming in pain, but as Dani listened closer, he seemed to be laughing. Energy flowed from the Doctor and into the sleeping Vordraxis, who began to stir, waking up. They pulled apart their slimy cocoons and clambered out of them, dropping down to the floor to watch as the Doctor woke them all up. Finally, as all twelve of the Vordraxis had dropped to the floor, the light snaked back into the monitor, and the Doctor slumped to the floor. [B]"Doctor!" [/B]shouted Dani, rushing between the Vordraxis towards the figure on the floor. He rolled him over, and the Doctor greeted the sight of Dani's face with a broad grin. [B]"We gave them life!" [/B]he said, getting to his feet and facing the lead Vordraxis. [B]"I am Kelthor of the Vordraxis," [/B]he said in a deep baritone, [B]"And we owe you a great debt, Doctor." "Just do one thing for me, will you?" [/B]the Doctor asked, [B]"Make a new life for the Vordraxis. Don't do what your forebears did and drain unwilling victims for sustenance, try and find somewhere with an abundance of spare psychic energy and use that. The planet Hadron might be a good place to start looking. Be peaceful." "We will do as you ask, Doctor," [/B]said Kelthor, before turning to his fellows, who raised their hands in the air, and in an instant they all vanished, disappearing in a blast of blue light. [B]"Wow," [/B]said Dani. That was all he could say, and the Doctor just beamed at him. --- Back at the park outside Dani's flat, the Doctor unlocked the TARDIS and opened the door. [B]"Doctor," [/B]said Dani, [B]"I just have a few questions." "Go on then," [/B]sighed the Doctor, [B]"Make it quick." "Right. First of all, what did you do with the computer? How did you wake the Vordraxis up?" "Oh, it was a simple matter of directing all that primal instinct to absorb psychic energy to focus in on me, rather than everyone out there on the internet. I seem to have rather a lot of it going spare, you see." "How come the Vordraxis were speaking English?" "Psychic field set up by the TARDIS," [/B]he patted the blue box, [B]"It automatically translates for you. You were affected because you were near me, that's the way it works." "And the last question...who are you?" "You know that one," [/B]he replied with a smile, [B]"I'm the Doctor!" "Yeah, but who exactly [I]is [/I]the Doctor? You're an alien, right?" [/B]The Doctor looked up into the sky, his expression suddenly serious. He looked around at the clouds for a few moments, then turned back to Dani and said: [B]"If you really want to find out, you could always...come with me. I could use a new travelling companion - you seem to know what you're doing. So if you want to come along, then hop in the TARDIS, and I'll show you some things you wouldn't believe. If not, then it was a pleasure, Dani Posner." [/B]He withdrew into the blue box, leaving the door open a tiny crack. Dani bit his lip, weighed up all the options in his head, then pushed open the door and went inside the TARDIS, closing the door after him. The machine started, making that peculiar noise, and disappeared from sight... --- [I]ooc: Alright, that's episode one finished - Vicky, the next episode is yours. You have a totally free reign over what is going to happen - just send me a PM with a brief outline of what the story is and then make your first post![/I] [/SIZE]

[center][SIZE=3][B][U]Doctor Who [SIZE=2]Episode One: Leeches [/SIZE][/U][/B][SIZE=2][SIZE=1]Synopsis: [I]The Doctor arrives on Earth to find a young computer hacker by the name of Dani Posner in trouble. He soon takes matters into his own hands, and uncovers a dangerous plot... --- [/I][B]CLASSIFIED BY JURISDICTION OF TORCHWOOD[/B] Dani Posner read the words that flashed up on his computer screen and scowled. This "Torchwood" had been blocking his attempts for months, and he was beginning to get irritable. His fingers flew across the keyboard, his eyes still locked on the screen. As he typed, the words began to melt away, replaced by the government site he had been trying to get access to. [B]"Yes,"[/B] he whispered to himself, and continued to tap away at his keyboard, downloading a number of government files regarding "Torchwood." One of them, a video file, intrigued him, so he opened it and displayed it on the full screen. It just showed a swirling spiral of pale blue light, which he watched for a few moments, then got bored and moved his mouse to the Exit button. [B]DO NOT EXIT THIS PROGRAM[/B] [B]"No computer's gonna tell me what to do,"[/B] he said, hitting the Exit button and causing the video file to vanish. As he continued to download the files, his Media Player popped up again, and began to play the same video. He raised an eyebrow and hit the Exit button again, but it didn't work. [B]DO NOT EXIT THIS PROGRAM "Apparently I couldn't if I wanted to,"[/B] he said, and resigned himself to leaving the video file open. [B] GOOD BOY[/B] [B]"This is some messed-up video,"[/B] he said with a smirk, and continued to watch, "The government files have gone downhill." [B]COME CLOSER, DANI "What?"[/B] he whispered, and moved his head closer to the screen, apparently without realising it, [B]"How does this thing know who I am?" [/B] He tried to move his hands to hit the keyboard, to try and disable the program, but he couldn't move his hands, as if they were glued to his desk. [B]WE WANT YOUR MIND "Who? Who wants my mind? Who are you?" WE ARE THE HARVESTERS "What?!"[/B] Dani shouted as a thin tendril of blue light snaked from the computer screen and hit him square in the forehead. He shook and spasmed as the tendril began to force it's way inside his mind, never breaking the skin, but penetrating his mind. The tendril began to quiver, and turned pale pink, glowing softly in the darkness of Dani's room, lighting up posters for The Clash, The Sex Pistols and other punk bands that were plastered across Dani's walls. [B]"Get out of his head,"[/B] said a cold voice from behind Dani, and a hand reached across his shoulder, some sort of weird device clenched in his hand, emitting a dark blue glow from the tip, and a strange humming noise. The program on the computer shut down, and then the computer itself shut down, the screen going black, and smoke began to pour from the hard drive. The tendril withdrew itself, turning from pink back to blue, and dissipated into thin air. Dani coughed and spluttered as he was released from the tendril's grasp, and he looked up at the figure standing behind him. He was a tall-ish man, with dark brown hair, wearing a blue suit with a pale blue shirt and a maroon tie. The device he had used was in his pocket, along with his hand, and he had a cold expression on his face. [B]"Wh-who are you?"[/B] Dani gasped. [B]"I'm the Doctor."[/B] --- [I]Five minutes earlier... The park, just outside Camden, was deserted, bizarrely for this time of day. There was a chilly sort of wind whipping up, and the autumn leaves were whipping around, caught on the breeze. The swings swung slowly back and forth, and the merry-go-round creaked as it spun of its own accord. A single little girl hopped over the steel fence and ran to the climbing frame, which she clambered up and sat on top of. She looked down over her childish dominion and smiled - this was one of the few places she was happy. A strange noise suddenly filled the air, seeming to come from everywhere and yet nowhere, all at once. A stronger wind blew up around the merry-go-round, sending it into a faster spin, the metal squealing. And as the little girl looked over to where the sound seemed to be coming from, she saw a light, about eight feet up in the air, and slowly but surely a large object followed it into existence. As she looked on, astonished, she saw a blue box appear from mid-air. It became totally solid, and the light and sound stopped, fading into nothing, and the door of the box opened. A smartly-dressed man stepped out, wearing a blue suit under a long brown jacket, which reached right down to his ankles. His feet were clad in red trainers, which shattered the illusion that he could be a businessman. He loosened his maroon tie a little, ran his hand through his thick brown hair and locked the door of the blue box. He turned around to go, and saw the little girl staring at him, her mouth open wide. His eyes widened, and he looked from the box to the little girl and back. He clenched his teeth and blew a lungful of air out between them. [B]"It's magic. You can't tell anyone about it, alright?"[/B] he said with a smile and a wink, and the girl nodded furiously, [B]"Good girl. Now, have you seen anyone in trouble around here?" [/B] [B]"What sort of trouble?"[/B] she replied, [B]"We get all sorts around here."[/B] [B]"Something you haven't really seen before,"[/B] said the man, wandering over to her, his hands in his pockets, [B]"Something...weird. I got a strange beacon reading from somewhere around here."[/B] The girl looked at him blankly, and he shook his head and said: "[B]Sorry. Um, I found out someone might be in trouble around here. Do you have any idea who it might be?" "Not really,"[/B] she said, shaking her head, [B]"Although there is a boy who walks round here sometimes. He always wear really weird clothes. He's funny." "Ok, and where does this strange boy live?"[/B] he asked, folding his arms on the top of the climbing frame and resting his chin on them, [B]"I might need to pay him a visit." "Over there,"[/B] she said, pointing to a block of flats not far from the park, [B]"Right up on the top floor."[/B] The man looked up, and suddenly a flash of blue light shone through the curtained window. His head perked up, his eyes widening again, and he took off at a run, vaulting over the park fence, turning round briefly to shout to the little girl: [B]"Thanks! Remember, the magic box is our little secret!"[/B] She nodded and waved as he ran off, his jacket flapping in the breeze as he did, his trainers slapping on the concrete of the path.[/I] --- [B]"What was happening to me?"[/B] asked Dani, pouring himself a glass of water from the tap in the kitchen. [B]"I'm not sure,"[/B] said the Doctor, shrugging his jacket off and placing it on the arm of the nearest chair, [B]"Something was getting at you through the computer, but I've never seen anything like that before, and I've seen a lot of stuff." "You're him, though, aren't you?"[/B] asked Dani, stepping back into his room and sipping the glass of water, [B]"You're this "Doctor" all the government sites are talking about? The man who killed Mr Saxon?" "Is that what they're saying about me now?"[/B] asked the Doctor, surprised, [B]"Blimey. The government have never liked me much, but this is a bit far." "But you were on the Valiant when he died? I'm not that bothered, really, Saxon was a bit of a scumbag anyway." "Yeah, I was on the Valiant, but...wait, how do you know about me? And how do you know about the Valiant?" "I do a lot of...internet research." "So I see. Was that Torchwood you were hacking into?" "Trying to, at least, before whatever that thing was tried to do me in." "That's impressive. I've only ever met one other person who got around the Torchwood firewalls, and he's...well, he's gone now. Course, that doesn't really matter now...what was your name again?" "Dani Posner,"[/B] said the boy. The Doctor looked him up and down - he looked a little scruffy, but then who was he to talk? [B]"Well, Dani Posner,"[/B] he said finally, [B]"I may well need your help. Do you have another computer?"[/B] Dani pulled a laptop out from a cupboard and placed it down on the desk, flipping it open. The Doctor busied himself scanning the edges of the original computer's hard drive with his sonic screwdriver, taking the front off and selecting a few circuit boards from inside. [B]"If I can use your internet connection to isolate the source of the signal from before, maybe I can find out what was doing this to you. We just need to trace the energy signature from...wait a second. Who's the Prime Minister now?" "James Redfield. He's been on the news a lot lately - says he's cracking down on any and all unusual activities in Britain - he's not a fan of Torchwood, from what I read on his personel file." "Jack won't be happy..."[/B] the Doctor mumbled. [B]"Who's Jack?" "Oh, no-one...just an old friend. Very old, actually,"[/B] he said as he aimed his sonic screwdriver at the laptop screen. It emitted the usual buzzing noise, and the screen changed to a map of the United Kingdom. [B]"How did you do that?"[/B] asked Dani, astonished. [B]"Sonic screwdriver,"[/B] the Doctor replied, holding up the little object, [B]"Can do just about anything with the right persuasion." "I have got to get me one of them,"[/B] he said, his eyes glazing over. [B]"No no no," [/B]said the Doctor, snatching the screwdriver back, [B]"I can't just go around letting humans play with advanced technology. You'll find this stuff out yourself, in time." "So you're not human?"[/B] asked Dani, [B]"The Torchwood files were right?" "Nope, not human,"[/B] the Doctor replied, staring at the screen as the program isolated the source of the signal, [B]"There you go. The signal's coming from the top of Tower Bridge. We go there, we find what we've been looking for, we find the thing that tried to attack you. Are you coming with me, Dani Posner? I could use a helping hand." "Um...alright then,"[/B] said Dani, [B]"Let me just grab a few things."[/B] He hunted around the apartment, grabbing a bag and stuffing a jacket and his laptop into it, then swung it onto his back and opened the front door. [B]"Excited?"[/B] the Doctor asked with a broad grin on his face as he shrugged his jacket on again and headed out the door, [B]"You should be!" --- [/B][I]OOC: It's on you now, Vicky. PM me if you have any questions, if not, just get us to Tower Bridge![/I] [/SIZE][/SIZE][/SIZE][/center]

[SIZE=1]Alright, Vicky and Ozy, you're both in on the action. I'm just about to put up the Adventure Square thread - but this is where it gets a little complicated. I've been reviewing my ideas, and I've decided that instead of doing 13 episodes and having three two-part episodes, I'm just going to have 10 episodes, 3 of which are longer and more detailed than the others. From what I can work out, the episodes are going to be around 3 to 4 fairly lengthy posts long, probably more once everyone is involved. Which brings me to my next point. Ozy, as your character is from a different time altogether than Vicky's, I am going to have the Doctor pick Dani up in the first episode, and then we can pick Stevie up in a later episode (probably episode 3). I will be writing the first episode, then Vicky can write the second, Ozy can write the third and then the cycle will continue again (although there will be a slight blip later on). When you are writing an episode, I'd like you to send me a PM giving me a brief outline of the story of your episode - it doesn't have to be anything too in-depth, just an outline - you can make up the twists and turns without telling me, that way there will be some things which will be a surprise to me. For now, if you have any questions, just PM me. If the volume of questions gets too big, I will open up an Underground thread for them. Enjoy! [/SIZE]

[B][FONT=Lucida Sans Unicode]"Scientists Discover Dr Pepper Is Elixir Of Life!" "Godzilla Re-Locates To Lebanon After Japanese Government Sues For Damages!" "Saddam Hussein and Elvis: Separated At Birth?" [/FONT][/B]

[SIZE=1]Looking good, Vicky, looking good. And now here he is, the main man himself (beware: it's kind of long - I got a little carried away with it when I was writing it): [B]Name:[/B] The Doctor [B]Age:[/B] At least 900 years, appears early thirties due to numerous regenerations [B]Gender:[/B] Male [B]Race:[/B] Time Lord [B]Origin:[/B] Gallifrey [B]Items/Gadgets:[/B] The ever-trusty sonic screwdriver. This handy little device has a number of functions, including operating almost any lock (however, deadbolt seals make it pretty much obsolete), repairing equipment and almost any other function you can think of. The one thing the Doctor will never use it for, however, is to kill. He also carries a piece of psychic paper in a small leather wallet. This paper will show the person viewing it whatever they need to see, meaning it can act as an identity badge in many situations, getting the Doctor and his Companions into places they wouldn't normally be allowed to go. [B]Special Skills/Abilities:[/B] Not only does the Tenth Doctor have an encyclopedic knowledge of the universe, its history and all goings-on within, he also seems to have a skill for talking his way out of almost any given situation. The gift of the gab, he calls it. He has an eidetic memory for place names, and whenever the TARDIS lands, he can reel off a list of information about the place as long as his arm. And he has long arms. As a Gallifreyan, if the Doctor is killed, suffers a mortal wound or is incapacitated with no chance of recovery, he can choose to regenerate his cellular structure. This means that his physical form changes, sometimes quite drastically, while his mind stays the same (although his personality often changes along with his features). However, he can only perform this action twelve times, and as he is on his Tenth, he is quite possibly nearing the end of his regenerative cycle. He has also displayed a number of psychic abilites. He can wander in people's minds, opening "doors" to feelings, although sometimes this leaves his own mind open for wandering into by the other person involved. The most prominent of these uses was when he tapped into Mr Saxon's "Archangel" Network to gain psychic access to every human mind in the world, thus letting him use the psychic energy as both a shield and a weapon in the form of telekinesis. However, it is very rare that he will ever get this much power again. [B]Appearance:[/B] [U][B][URL="http://i16.photobucket.com/albums/b16/Blayze54/TenthDoctor.jpg"]The Doctor[/URL][/B][/U]. He sometimes dons a pair of thick black-rimmed spectacles, although it is unknown whether these are actually to help his eyesight or if they just help him think. [B]Personality:[/B] The Tenth Doctor is cheeky, that's the best word to describe him, and one he uses with increasing regularity. He always has a quirky smile and a wink for anyone he is fond of; he is also fairly hyperactive, leaping and running about a lot more than some of his previous regenerations. He displays a light-hearted, easy-going manner, full of wit and charm. However, he has a darker side, showing an almost egocentric sense of being unstoppable towards his enemies. He claims that "there is no higher authority" than himself, that he, as a Time Lord, is the most powerful being in the galaxy. He is also less merciful than he once was, giving his enemies one warning before punishing them if they persist in their hostilities. He has a strong sense of justice, and if he feels something is unjust, he will try to counter it. He switches rapidly between moods, often babbling, mixing incoherent nonsense with important information, using extensive technobabble before reverting to a simpler analogy to help those around him understand. He has also been known to use reverse psychology to stop people doing things which he feels are wrong. Despite his constant interaction with others, though, the Doctor is, deep down, a lonely person. He has admitted, on several occasions, that the incredibly long lifespan of a Time Lord is more of a curse than a blessing, saying that while his human companions continue to leave him, to grow old and die, he lives on, never seeming to age at all. He lost everyone he ever had in the Time War, his friends, his family, his entire race, and the loss of the only other Time Lord to survive, the Master, he has become even more despondant. He is now truly alone in the universe. He is more friendly towards the friends and families of his Companions than his previous incarnation, and he also seemse a lot fonder of the human race as a whole, being totally in awe of their curiosity and tenacity, and knows the importance of human emotions, unlike many of his enemies (most notably the Daleks and the Cybermen). [B]Biography:[/B] After his Ninth incarnation absorbed the entire Time Vortext from the Heart of the TARDIS in order to save his Companion, Rose Tyler, his cells were damaged beyond repair. In order to save his own life, he initialised the process of regeneration, forcing his cells to regenerate, giving him a new form, and a new lease of life. However, the regeneration process went slightly wrong, and remained in a comatose state until he was revived by the free radicals and tannin from a hot cup of tea which had dripped onto the TARDIS's power source. He promptly proceeded to beat the leader of the malevolent Sycorax, save the Earth and depose the current Prime Minister, all while still in his pyjamas. He took Rose on a number of adventures, where he encountered new friends, such as Madame de Pompadour in 18th Century France, the crew of a space station orbiting the even horizon of a black hole, and a version of Rose's father from a parallel dimension, while also meeting enemies old and new, including the deadly Cybermen, the Sisters of Plenitude (nun-nurses evolved from cats), and the terrifying presence of the Daleks. During his final battle with the Cybermen and the Daleks ("The Battle of Canary Wharf"), in which millions of Cybermen arrived on Earth from a parallel dimension, followed by four Daleks, calling themselves "The Cult of Skaro," who proceeded to open a Time Lord prison ship known to them as the "Genesis Ark," which contained billions of Dalek prisoners. A battle began between the Cybermen and the Daleks, in which the Daleks looked superior. Until the Doctor opened a door to the Void, the dead space which lies between parallel dimensions, the space the Cult of Skaro had been hiding for centuries, and sucked them all, Daleks and Cybermen, back through into hell. But in this final assault, Rose was lost to the Doctor, becoming trapped on a parallel Earth with no means of ever contacting the Doctor again. He was alone once more. Then, after saving the Earth at Christmas once again, from the Empress of the Racnoss (an ancient race thought to be extinct, coming from the "Dark Times" of the universe), he encountered Martha Jones, a young doctor from London, and she promptly became his new companion. After travels which once again reunited the Doctor with the Cult of Skaro (and destroyed all but one of them, leaving one Dalek in existence), his time with Martha culminated with an encounter with the Doctor's greatest adversary: the Master. A fellow Time Lord, but one who is totally insane, bent on destruction and death, and who travelled back in time from the end of the universe (where he was in hiding, disguised as a human), and became Prime Minister of Great Britain. After seizing power from the Americans and under the guise of "Mr Saxon," the Master ripped open a time paradox and unleashed 6.5 billion alien killing machines on the population of Earth, eliminating one tenth of the population and plunging the human race into a year of darkness and death. However, it was Martha Jones who saved the Earth, preaching to every human on Earth the word of the Doctor, and giving him enough psychic energy to defeat the Master, and the paradox machine was destroyed, causing time to rewind one year, to the time before all this happened. However, the Master was shot by his human wife, and died in the Doctor's arms, refusing to regenerate. The Doctor cremated his old friend and adversary, his "best enemy," and as Martha stayed with her family to recover from the events of "the year that never was," the Doctor left Earth in the TARDIS, and was already on his way when the great ship Titanic crashed into the side of the vessel. After a bizarre adventure on the Titanic, the Doctor returned to Earth to find a new Companion to continue his adventures with...[/SIZE]

[center][B][U]Doctor Who [/U][/B][center][SIZE=1][I]"He's like fire and ice and rage. He's like the night, and the storm in the heart of the sun. He is ancient and forever. He burns at the centre of time and he can see the turn of the universe. And...he's wonderful..."[/I] -Tim Latimer, 1913 [I]"His name is The Doctor. He has saved your lives so many times and you never even knew he was there. He never stops. He never stays. He never asks to be thanked. But I've seen him, I know him... I love him... And I know what he can do..."[/I] -Martha Jones, former Companion [I]"I'm not just a Time Lord. I'm the last of the Time Lords..."[/I] -The Tenth Doctor --- He is the Doctor, a Time Lord from the planet of Gallifrey. The last of the Time Lords. The rest were wiped out years ago, burning in the sky along with their sworn enemies, the Daleks. He was at the fall of Arcadia, he watched as the Dalek Emperor took control of the Cruciform, and he initiated the final assault which tore the Daleks and the Time Lords from the sky. Now all he has to live for is his TARDIS (Time And Relative Dimensions In Space), the machine which allows him to travel through time and space of his own free will. He picks up Companions from various planets and eras (although he has recently become fond of travelling with Londoners from the beginning of the 21st Century), and takes them on fantastic journeys across the stars. One day you could meet Alexander the Great, the next you could be hurtling towards the year 5 billion. It's all in a day's work for the Doctor. After recently parting ways with his Companion Martha and a strange adventure aboard the Titanic, the Doctor has returned to London, 2008 to find a new Companion and begin his adventures anew. Surprises and secrets lurk around every corner, from the deadly forces of the Cybermen to the Rift in space that lies in Cardiff, and everything in between. All that remains is to find someone willing to do the job. --- This RP is a little different from those I have created recently. The major difference is that, other than myself, I am only looking for one or two characters to participate. This means that it will be small-scale, nothing epic or groundbreaking, but just a group of dedicated RPers weaving their own story in an already-created (but as yet, mostly unexplored) universe. The characters you will be signing up for will be the Doctor's new Companion(s). There can be two, but no more than two. If I don't get enough decent qaulity sign-ups for two, there can be one. It doesn't really matter at this stage. Anyroad, the way the RP progresses will be fairly simple - there will be chapters, but they would be more like episodes of the TV series, and each episode will be written by a different person. The cast of two or three will take it in turns coming up with an idea for an episode, and the others will carry it on from there. There will be 13 episodes in all, and 3 two-part stories (taking up 6 episodes altogether). The other 7 episodes will stand alone. Here is what I will need from each of you. [B]Name: Age: Gender:[/B] [not difficult really] [B]Race:[/B] [most likely human, but humanoid aliens are accepted - if you make up your own species of humanoid alien then please give some detail about the race] [B]Home Planet:[/B] [most likely to be Earth, but if not then be creative] [B]Items/Gadgets:[/B] [Self explanatory] [B]Special Skills/Abilities:[/B] [what can you do that marks you out from the rest?] [B]Appearance:[/B] [Image or description will do] Personality: [B]Biography:[/B] [minimum of 3 paragraphs] If you are not picked as a Companion, then have no fear, I will call on you to play a number of bit-parts in various episodes - people the Doctor encounters on his travels and the like. For instance, I plan to bring Martha Jones back at some point, and I can't imagine a series without Captain Jack Harkness making a re-appearance ;). As a side-note, a decent knowledge of the series and the Whoniverse in general will be helpful - if you don't have access to episodes (they can be found to stream all over the internet) then [B][URL="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Doctor_who"]Wikipedia[/URL][/B] (clicky) is a helpful resource. Happy Creating![/SIZE] [/center] [/center]

[FONT=Lucida Sans Unicode]I've just written a response for you, Jamie. As you can see, Alastor is not a fan of the Summoning magic - I guess that's what comes of having a father who was once deep in the Ministry: you get a little paranoid.[/FONT]

[FONT=Lucida Sans Unicode]Al watched the two teachers sitting astride the powerful beasts they had Summoned, and felt something stir deep inside. As others around him were chattering about what their own guardian might be, he felt no such curiosity. There was something within him that felt that these creatures, the entire practice of Summoning beasts from the Aetherius was wrong, on so many, many levels. He had read about this kind of thing in some of the really ancient textbooks that lay on the dusty shelves in the library, and he had always had a bad feeling about it. He looked over at Albert, who, like him, said nothing, but merely stared at the teachers and their guardian creatures, a strange, sorrowful glint in his eye. There was something about that boy, something that bothered Alastor. He would have to find time to talk to him soon. [/FONT][FONT=Lucida Sans Unicode][SIZE=2][B]"We both shall begin teaching summoning to those interested as part of the Duelling Club, but be warned, you will not be able to summon a guardian of this strength until you are much older...[/B]? boomed Corvidae, but Alastor and Albert were two of the only students listening. Corvidae swept his gaze across the crowd, and for a moment Alastor could have sworn he locked gazes with him. But he forgot this in a split second as Corvidae looked on the rest of the crowd. Alastor fumbled in his pocket for his wand, simply to grab onto the wooden shaft and hold on tight, more for comfort than anything else. He was beginning to get a headache. Sure enough, Professor Conroy then began her Basilisk moving again, and the demonstration began once more... [/SIZE][/FONT]

[FONT=Lucida Sans Unicode]Alastor walked along with the fifth-year, Albert, walking beside him as they stepped out into the grounds. The sun was already high above the horizon, flooding the grounds with a pleasant golden glow. Al smiled, and remembered why he loved the school so much. This was why it was his real home. He stopped and took in a deep breath of cool morning air, and set off down the fields to the Quidditch pitch, where there was already a gathering. [B]"So, Albert," [/B]he said, [B]"What are you thinking about this demonstration?" "Oh, I don't really know," [/B]the boy replied, [B]"Professor Corvidae has been very secretive about it. I would have thought you would have known something about it." "Why's that?" "Well, your father is Head of the Auror Office." "Was." "What?" "He was Head of the Auror Office, until my mum died. Then he had to step down, and Harry Potter took the job. To be honest, I think Potter's much better than dad ever was. Him, Ronald Weasley and Hermione Granger, you know, the Head of Magical Law Enforcement, they totally revolutionised the Ministry. It's better than it ever was under Fudge or Scrimgeour, ever since Kingsley Shacklebolt came into office." "Wow. You seem to know a lot about the Ministry," [/B]said Albert quietly. [B]"I'm planning to become an Auror. You have to know about the inside workings of the Ministry if you're going to be successful. I was just lucky my dad was who he was for so long." [/B]Albert refrained from asking any more questions as they reached the Quidditch pitch. Corvidae and Conroy were already there, standing in the centre of the pitch, Conroy in her green and silver robes, Corvidae in his black cloak, their wands at the ready, simply waiting for everyone to pack into the stands. Alastor managed to snag a front row seat, Elias following in next to him, then Dean, followed by Albert, who seemed a little uncomfortable sitting with the three friends. Al watched intently as Professor Conroy held her wand to her throat and said the word "[I]Sonorous," [/I]under her breath. Immediately her voice filled the stadium. [/FONT][FONT=Lucida Sans Unicode][COLOR=DarkOliveGreen][B]"Welcome, everyone, I'm so glad so many of you have turned up for this special occasion. Hopefully those of you who aren't already in the Duelling Club will change their minds after today, hmm?" [/B][COLOR=Black]Al smiled at this remark. Professor Conroy was a great devotee of the Duelling Club, and she found herself surprised that not more people were a part of it, even though the number of members was getting close to triple digits. He didn't need to worry, though, as he had been part of the Lions ever since he started the school.[/COLOR] [B]"I've heard many rumours going around about what we'll be doing today, so I suppose there's no better way to quash them than to just show you this powerful magic. I must warn you all, however, that there are risks, and if you feel in danger please feel free to leave. We won't be offended." [/B][COLOR=Black]Alastor watched as the two teachers marked out the pitch with red lines of what seemed to be flowing ribbon, which settled into place to become a marker on the grass. They moved to the requisite three feet away from each other, and Alastor began to feel his senses tingling in expectation. There was powerful magic in the air, and it was making the tiny hairs on the back of his neck prickle. However, he also began to feel a pain in his stomach, like there was a wire inside trying to drag it inside out. He clutched his stomach and blinked the stars out of his eyes, tiny tears rolling from the corners. He wiped his eyes, and a moment later the pain passed. He shook his head, trying to get some kind of recollection of anything that could have caused this, but he came up a blank. Suddenly, a whisper of excitement went round the crowd, as Conroy and Corvidae bowed low to each other, as Duelling Club guidelines clearly state. Then they pulled up and stood tall again, facing each other, Conroy with a steely glint in her eye. [/COLOR][B] "Good luck, Alexander. I look forward to seeing what you can come up with."[/B][/COLOR][/FONT]

[FONT=Lucida Sans Unicode]Not at all, Sandy. I forgot that we were a year after the epilogue. I changed it so that instead of never having heard of Peeves, he's never encountered him instead. Seems like this demonstration could really fill out the stands on the Quidditch pitch, Gavin. I'm rather intrigued... [/FONT]

[FONT=Lucida Sans Unicode]Alastor had managed to book the Quidditch pitch for the Tuesday Afternoon, meaning that Gryffindor would be one of the first teams to have their full line-up this year. That was good - it meant he would have a head-start on training them to beat Slytherin this year. There were a lot of people who wanted to try out, and, looking at the list, Al reckoned only about half of them would even be anywhere near up to standard. He was fairly certain he would keep Galatea as the Seeker and Elias as a Beater, meaning he had four more positions to fill, but he was keeping his options open. As good as Elias was, there could be someone better out there, but he knew for certain there wouldn't be anyone as good as Galatea as a Seeker. She was fast, agile, and had eyes like a hawk, excellent for spotting the elusive Golden Snitch, even in the worst of conditions. But nobody was really thinking about Quidditch yet. There was more excitement generating around Professors Conroy and Corvidae, and their combined Defense Against The Dark Arts and Duelling Club demonstration this morning. Rumours were running around the Great Hall like wildfire at breakfast. [B]"I hear it's some kind of dark magic Corvidae picked up in Borneo..." "My big brother told me that Professor Conroy has managed to come up with some kind of really powerful defensive spell..." "If my father's contacts in the Ministry are anything to go by, Corvidae's got something very special up his sleeve..." [/B]Alastor tried to blot out these murmurings as he tucked into his breakfast. He was nervous enough about the new responsibility of being Quidditch captain without worrying about a demonstration. He looked up from his eggs as Elias and Dean came to sit down, and saw a group of second-years wandering past, trying to find a place along the crowded Gryffindor table to sit down. He smiled a little, remembering what it was like when he was fairly new to the school, and as a gesture of kindness, he flicked his wand at the bench opposite, which increased in length slightly, leaving a gap just opposite him. He nodded to the second-years, who promptly sat down and looked at their empty plates. [B]"You have to serve the food yourself," [/B]said Elias, heaping rashers of bacon onto his already-full plate, [B]"It doesn't just appear like it does on the platters." [/B]The second-years nodded furiously, looking incredibly embarassed, and began spooning porridge into their bowls. [B]"What's your name?" [/B]Al asked the kid directly opposite him. [B]"Albus Potter," [/B]he replied quietly. [B]"I thought I recognised the hair. No-one except a Potter could have hair that black," [/B]Al said, [B]"Your brother's in the third year, right?"[/B] Albus nodded. [B]"Yeah. James is always telling me these horror stories about Hogwarts. Like all this stuff about the Chamber of Secrets, and how there used to be a Basilisk that lived in the water pipes." "Way I heard it, your dad took pretty good care of that for the school," [/B]said Dean, [B]"So I don't expect you'll have to worry about that while you're here. Moaning Myrtle might bother you while you're on the toilet, and Peeves will almost definitely try to lock you in a Vanishing Cabinet, but those sorts of things become second nature to you after your second or third year year." "Who's Peeves?" "Oh, you haven't met Peeves yet? He's the school poltergeist. He'll try to chuck stuff at you, shout names at you, all sorts. Trick is, you just need to lob a couple of decent hexes at him, and he'll leave you alone. You'll learn some decent ones in your first Charms class, I reckon. Professor Crowe's usually pretty good at that kind of thing. Just ask him." "Are my ears burning, boys?" [/B]came a gravelly, but not unpleasant voice from behind Alastor, who turned around to see the impressive figure of Professor Crowe standing behind him, [B]"Scaring the young'uns, are we?" "Nothing of the sort, Professor. We were just telling them to look out for Peeves, and that maybe you could teach them a couple of hexes to keep him off their backs for a while," [/B]said Alastor. [B]"Well, Robards, I think I can see my way clear to teaching the young'uns how to deal with pesky poltergeists. Not strictly on the syllabus, but practical knowledge is always useful." "Thank you, sir," [/B]said Elias politely, [B]"Do you have any idea what kind of thing Corvidae is going to show us this morning?" "[I]Professor [/I]Corvidae, please, Longbottom. And as for what they're going to do, I have absolutely no idea, I'm afraid, but even if I did, you wouldn't want to spoil the element of surprise, now, would you?" "I suppose not, sir," [/B]replied Elias, turning back to his breakfast. [B]"Well, I'll see you all out there soon, boys," [/B]said Crowe, walking up between the rows of tables to get to the Staff Table. [B]"He's totally mental, is that one," [/B]whispered Dean, [B]"Me dad reckons there's something wrong with him." "He's just friendly, Dean, nothing to worry about." [/B]Alastor said these calming words, but even as he said them, the tiniest seed of suspicion was planted in the back of his mind. But he pushed it away and got back to his breakfast, and the interrogation of Harry Potter's youngest son. [/FONT]