Albert Flasher

[FONT=Times New Roman][COLOR=Sienna]Come on, you can do better than that. That one's easy. The Marx Brother's masterpiece IMO, Animal Crackers. Right?[/COLOR][/FONT]

[FONT=Times New Roman][COLOR=Sienna]Girls. Have. Cooties. Hopefully they don't like anything about me >.>[/COLOR][/FONT]

[FONT=Times New Roman][COLOR=Sienna]Congradulations. You're Captain America. Sadly for you, you're now Captain America. And literally everyone hates Captain America. You get absolutely owned by Captain Canuck, who beats the **** out of you with a pair of living beavers and than forces you to swallow 5 gallons of maple syrup, while the now-hockey-stick-armed beavers beat you over the head. You die of a combonation of sugar overdose and trauma to the head. I wish I was a porn star.[/COLOR][/FONT]

[FONT=Times New Roman][COLOR=Sienna]Hurray. You've got a million (1,000,000) wishes. You're still ugly, though. *only thing I could come up with that was bad about a million wishes...* I wish I was a video game character from some random first-person-shooter.[/COLOR][/FONT]

[FONT=Times New Roman][COLOR=Sienna]The only thing funny is your grammar! BAM![/COLOR][/FONT]

[FONT=Times New Roman][COLOR=Sienna]Congradulations! You have an echidna!Sadly, the All Powerful Wishdude has no idea what an echidna is, and is to lazy to look it up. As a cheap cop-out, I've decided to just give you a time bomb. You have 20 seconds to regret making me look stupid. I wish I had a really, really big pizza. [/COLOR][/FONT]

[FONT=Times New Roman][COLOR=Sienna]Congradulations! You can summon any star just by singing a word! Unfortunatly for you, stars are very, very hot! In fact, they are so hot, that the second a star gets near the atmosphere of the earth, the entire planet is cooked and the oceans boil! Everyone dies! Congradulations for ending the friggin human race, jerk. I wish I was a bucket of paint.[/COLOR][/FONT]

[QUOTE=tanukioh] Please, everyone, try to focus on more than the dragons! talk about magic, monsters, alchemy, religion, astrology, prophetic dreams, psychics, or anything else "paranormal". Just remember....NO INSULTING ANYONE FOR THEIR VIEWS!!!!!!!!!![/QUOTE][FONT=Times New Roman] [COLOR=Sienna] Ok. Magic, in the general sense, defies the laws of science on every level and is thus impossible. You may think it works but chances are it's all in your head. Monsters do not exist either. There is no way that, in this day and age, a creature could exist without leaving a trace at all. Be it a corpse or a credible sighting, it would be found. Alchemy is a crackpot science invented by some nutty men in the middle ages with pointy hats to gain the kings favour... lead-to-gold etc. Religion... not getting into religion. Astrology is laughable. "Oh look, neptune is in Area X, thousands of pigeons in New Delhi will die!" Prophtic dreams are usually inspired by falling asleep in a room full of propane gas, or bieng on crack, or a combonation of both. Psychics are usually a bunch of fakes who misdirect people and use general terms to try and fool people into believe them. Satisfied?[/COLOR][/FONT]

[quote name='Shinmaru']Army of Darkness, right?[/quote] Yep. I couldn't think of any other movies lol.

[FONT=Times New Roman][COLOR=Sienna]Congradulations! You can now read other people's thoughts! Unfortunatly, you cannot control this power, and you are constantly bombarded by billions of thoughts every second. This eventually causes you to drive a rusty screwdriver through your forehead, which, although doesn't kill you, turns you into a vegitable for life. I wish I had a big screen plasma TV[/COLOR][/FONT]

[COLOR=Sienna]Name: Harry "Ben" Affleck Age: 27 Sex: Male Physical Description or Image: [URL=http://www.kommunalbogen.dk/img/artikler/ben-affleck-art5356.jpg]Harry[/URL] Affiliation: Villain Powers: Looks strikeingly similar to Ben Affleck. Also, if he makes eye contact with someone, he can cause the liquid in their brain to slowly boil, cooking the brain alive! The biggest weakness with this, of course, is that it takes about 5 minutes of staring to be even noticably lethal. But it's still evil! Origin: Harry was born from the womb of a Sataness, in the heart of a pentacle, while his mother bathed in the blood of a thousand dead babies, while Chuck Norris watched from the shadows - when he was born, every dog on the planet cried out in agony and that guy from Men In Black's head exploded and didn't regenerate! Well, that's what he likes to tell people... the truth is that he was born a spoiled brat in southen California, to an uncaring mother and father. He eventually decided that he wanted to leave home, as it was boring at home, and he traveled around the countryside for a while, until he somehow got some radioactive gooooo split on him, thus giving him his powers, a la any comic book in existence. The end. What Makes Him Stupid: Looks strikeingly similar to Ben Affleck. Also, he feels it necessary to go around talking with a dark, deep, scary voice, probably like Satan would sound like, if he looked strikeingly similar to Ben Affleck (Wholly possible). Interestingly enough, this is hardly considered strange in...[I] [FONT=Times New Roman][SIZE=4][B] IRRELEVENT CITY[/B][/SIZE][/FONT][/I] Edit: whoopsies, frogot something![/COLOR]

[FONT=Times New Roman][COLOR=Sienna]That would be Sucked ***... I mean, Resident Evil: Apocalypse. [IMG]http://www.garnersclassics.com/pics/army/boomstick.jpg[/IMG] This should also be decently easy.[/COLOR][/FONT]

I really don't want this thread to die, so I'll post a screenshot: [img]http://web.tiscalinet.it/silviodr/dance2.jpg[/img] This one should be SNAP easy.

[FONT=Times New Roman][COLOR=Sienna]Congradulations, you've become The Streaker and can run as fast as possible! Unfortunatly for you, the world obeys a little thing called 'physics.' You, however, are unaware of this, and decide to run as fast as possible. Your body literally liquifies and becomes molten plasma. You're now molten plasma. That's bad. I wish the internet was an actual place (i.e a mall) and that I lived there![/COLOR][/FONT]

[FONT=Times New Roman][COLOR=Sienna]Congradulations. You can now travel through time via a timemachine you built from scratch with your handy-dandy Hyperphysics For Dummies book and some scrap metal. Unfortunatly for you, you never actually traveled through time. When you flipped the switch, the machine wirred and buzzed and made a lot of sparks, but didn't destort space and time. You used the age-old solution of 'kicking the crap out of it', only to accidentally kick an electrical circuit. The electricty fried your brain and sent you into a coma; you only think you've traveled in time. This also explains why Genghis Kahn looks like your neighbour. [B]I wish I had a rocket launcher.[/B][/COLOR][/FONT]

[FONT=Times New Roman][COLOR=Sienna]Congradulations. You're a ghost. You're big and scary and have a fondness for poessessing unused undergarments. Unfortunatly, you just ****** with the wrong man's underpants. He calls the ghostbusters, and than all of a sudden Bill Murray in a jumpsuit shows up, with Dan Aykroyd, Harold Ramis, and that black guy who's name no one ever remembers, in toe. They ghostbust your *** and suck you into that giant washingmachine thingie, and than they neautrialize you. Pwnt.[B] I wish I was Jerry Springer.[/B][/COLOR][/FONT]

[QUOTE=tanukioh]To everyone asking for proof of dragons: they are in every culture in the world (as far as I know) and there was a "pickled dragon" found outside of a London museum. O.o it was in a jar, and people dunno if it is real, or fake. o.o so far, no conclusion has been made. ^_^ so I concider that proof. as for proof of monsters: there are photos of them (albiet fuzzy) and they are seen occasionally. :animesigh some people brush it off as over imagination, but they still could have seen one. Example: Westerners thought Pandas where only myth for years before one was actually documented. ^_^ Also, just because you cant see something, doesn't mean it's not real.[/QUOTE][FONT=Times New Roman] [COLOR=Sienna] Dragon in a jar? You mean [URL=http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pickled_dragon]this cuddly little creature?[/URL] Moveing on: what proof is there of monsters at all? Every time something even remotly credible comes up it turns out that it was a complete hoax, and other times it's just a claim. See my comment on the Australian Tiger; people have claimed to have seen it for years, but it doesn't change the fact that the creature is exstinct. And you're right, just because there is absolutely no evidence whatsoever of there being dragons or creatures of that sort, doesn't mean they never existed. However, as the great Sherlock Holmes would have said, the easiest solution (As opposed to the most crazy one) is almost always the correct one. Oh, and double posting is againts the rules.[/COLOR][/FONT]

[quote name='Sayuri-sama']actually i do believe anything is possible , so therefore i do believe that dragons could have existed. theres a lot of evidence that they did. if you look at it many other countries have the dragon in some some point in their history. how is it that so many different, isolated countries all came up with the same concept of the dragon? i for one do believe in them, although i also think that the human imagination has exaggerated their concept a little too much, such as the whole breathing fire thingy.also if you look at the great wall of china from above it is the spinal cord of a dragon. lol!! i luv dragons!!!:animesmil[/quote][FONT=Times New Roman] [COLOR=Sienna] See, the thing is (like I said in my post), these seperate cultures only have dragons because we lump them together. If you showed an ancient Chinaperson a picture of a European dragon, chances are they wouldn't have any idea what it was, or relate it in any way to the Eastern Dragons. Also, many cultures didn't have dragons, and many that did simply stole the idea of dragons from another culture (With some changes, of course). And about the pickled baby dragon in Germany: Last I heard, it was a hoax... I'd have to look in to it. But frankly, it sounds about as likely as finding a Australian Tiger or a Duck-billed Platapus (I refuse to believe that they exist!)[/COLOR][/FONT]

[quote name='kingN']I like science in all, but sometimes it can be dumb. like when scienist try to prove that GOD didn't make us or the world. But science and also help with sickness too and trying to find a cure for disease. But some people try to find everything out or explain everything by science. science well help find some things out and explain them, but there are just some thing you an't going to find out or explain with science.[/quote][FONT=Times New Roman] [COLOR=Sienna] All that science is is the study of the natural world. That is it. Scientists don't choose to invent things that disprove this or that, they look at something that occurs in the natural world and they document it. That is what science is. Even if there were no scientists there would damn-well be science, because no matter how hard you close your eyes and hope it goes away, the things that happen in the natural world happen in the natural world, and they will long after we and all sceintists are long gone. The general arguement tanukioh is the often cliched 'Absence of evidence is not evidence of abscence' statement, which really doesn't mean a thing. So what if there is no evidence AGAINTS it? There is no evidence that I couldn't destroy the entire population of the earth with a slipper, but do people act all terrified when I threaten too? No, they don't, they generally look at me like I'm some kind of leper. I'd imagine if you went up to people shouting "WIZARDS RIDING DRAGONS HAVE INVADED THE CITY AND ENSLAVED OUR MINDS WITH THEIR MAGIK POWERS!" you'd recieve similar treatment. Honestly, this whole thing is a tad... juvenile.[/COLOR][/FONT]

[quote name='silver_blade']Almost every culture in the world has some type of dragon. It seems unlikely for Asia, Europe, and South America to all have their own forms of dragons when the rest of the culture evolved so differently. Animal Planet had a really good show about how it is possible for dragons to have existed. Even the Bible mentions them.[/quote][FONT=Times New Roman] [COLOR=Sienna] 'Dragon' is a term we gave them as a group, but most of the different dragons in mythos are related because they are 'vaguely reptillian with big teeth.' For example, European dragons are large, winged creatures who breathed fire and captures maidens and gold and faught muscle-bound knights in big metal suits. Asian dragons, conversly, were very serpantine, benevolent creatures who were wise and magical and helped out headless samurai warriors in need. I'm hardly an expert on dragonic mythos, but I'd imagine the trend is similar whereever you go. The local dominant reptile becomes exagerated and turns into some mythical creature. The rainbow snake in Australia, that's a kind of dragon ('vaguely reptillian with big teeth'), but is it in any way related to the other kinds of dragons? Not really, no. So in short, while it's not impossible, it's so highly improbable it might as well be considered impossible.[/COLOR][/FONT]

[FONT=Times New Roman][COLOR=Sienna]I consider someone 'insane' when they become a threat to themselves and those around them. If someone is just a little on the strange side, than that's all they are... as Lix said, socially unacceptable. Little bit odd. I'm a little bit odd myself, but not what I'd classify as insane, yet I'm sure to others I'm a bloody loon. It's all about perspective, as you said. [/COLOR][/FONT]

[FONT=Times New Roman][COLOR=Sienna]So what you're saying is that there is proof that magic, dragons, wizards, etc, all exist, and science is a threat to said magic, dragons, and wizards, correct? I'm just generally confuzzled by this post. What are you trying to ask? Is this a carbon-copy of the 'what's your religion' thread or something? Are you trying to say science doesn't exist or is a myth? ??[/COLOR][/FONT]

[QUOTE=Retribution][size=1]I'm not certain what you're talking about at all. The followers of the religion might slander other religions, but that is not what Jesus' message was, and that is the most important part of it all. Forget what the religion itself says, forget what the followers say. To grasp what is essentially Christian, one must understand Jesus' [i]message.[/i] It's not about going to church, or praying everyday, or getting the sacriments. It's about loving thy neighbor and doing unto others as you would have them do unto you. [/size][/QUOTE][FONT=Times New Roman] [COLOR=Sienna] Like I said many times, it's not the followers of Christianity that irk me, it's Christianity itself. Christianity was a religion largely built for the purpose of slandering other religions that existed around the time of Constantine. Ever wonder why the Dead Sea Scrolls (Pre-Constantine) are so completely different from the commonly accepted bible (Post-Constantine)? It's because they were heavily edited so that Constantine could control the population. In order to NOT write a novel on the subject, I'll simply state that, in my opinion, Christians believe in propogandga that some ancient Roman ruler used as political leverage.[/COLOR][/FONT]

[FONT=Times New Roman][COLOR=Sienna]I classify myself as 'anti-theist.' Esentially, extremist athiesm - not only do I not believe in the notion of god, I [I]hate[/I] the notion of god. Keep in mind that I don't hate Christians themselves (For the most part), as some are very nice people, I simply hate the fact that some people listen to the lies and propogandga that Constantine the Great (Note: Constantine was an avid Pagan, who was only babtised on his death-bed because he was too weak to resist) used to control his people. Christianity (Note: not Christians!) have a special area of my hate reserved for them. Not because Christianity is any more corrupt and untrue than any other religions, but simply because I can't stand the millions of people who go around preaching that their religion is a religion of love and peace when their own holy book contradictes them. It's the contradictions that get me the most. Catholicism especially. PLEASE do not flame me for this post, as I don't really care how many of you add me to gods hitlist after this. It's just my opinion that religion is a cancer to this world and has been since the don of time (Ok, it might have helped the prehistoric men cope with the world, but that was then this is now). As I said, do not flame me for my opinion. My view on Christians is that they are generally nice people, please don't change that view. EDIT: I'd also like to say I find Christianity, a religion essentially built for the purpose of slandering other religions, hilarious, and I'll leave it at that.[/COLOR][/FONT]

[FONT=Times New Roman][COLOR=Sienna]Correct, good job. Fantastic film, aswell.[/COLOR][/FONT]