The Spectacular Professor

[FONT="Comic Sans MS"]Cartoon Network just called the year "Oh-ten." I want to send them a memo listing all the reasons that's wrong.[/FONT]

[quote name='chibi-master']You can do it, Ace! I believe in you! History is easy! I'm having the same problem with algebra. HOW IS IT POSSIBLE TO ADD WITH LETTERS?!?!?![/QUOTE] [FONT="Comic Sans MS"]9th grade Algebra? Trade me. Oh, I should probably mention that I need to finish all seven of these tonight, essentially.[/FONT]

[FONT="Comic Sans MS"]Alright, if I want to spend Spring Break with access to my DS, I need to defeat Seven Evil History Tests. Eat your heart out, Scott Pilgrim. I'm 18 years old and my mother is still grounding me largely because she doesn't understand how hard I'm already busting my own chops over schoolwork. Hooray.[/FONT]

[FONT="Comic Sans MS"]Fun fact: Red's level 88 Pikachu can OHKO a level 61 Tyranitar with Volt Tackle. Just though you all should be forewarned. I have a LOT of grinding to do.[/FONT]

[FONT="Comic Sans MS"]Ah, why the hell not. It's been too long. [B]Naruto Recap Chapter 488: Go Home Already[/B] Chapter appears to open in some kind of distillery or something. The Nation Lords are on a conference call. They use televisions that are apparently made of stone. I wonder if they get together to watch the Super Bowl on that thing. Anyway, they all want to get together and form an alliance. Water Lord is hesitant. Then he caves in to peer pressure like any competent leader of men would. They decide to inform Konoha. Cut to the forest, where everyone is wait what the hell. [CENTER][IMG]http://i109.photobucket.com/albums/n72/Aceburner85/Kibawut.png[/IMG][/CENTER] They're holding hands- er, paws- er.... Screw it, what you do in your free time is none of my concern, Kiba. Anyway, everyone is still dozing because of Sakura's ZANY SCHEME that nearly got everyone killed. Congratulations, bubblegum bangs. Now everyone's hatred of you is completely rational. Of course, Naruto yells at them for what Cherry Blossom Bimbo did. Kakashi tells her to wake them up and apologize like a good little girl. Yeah, that'll make the problem go away. Then Lee tries to get his sexy on as Naruto walks by or something. Now we get a gag panel in which Naruto falls asleep next to them all. TIME OUT Kishi, this isn't how gag panels work. You need to place them appropriately. They should also be funny, but considering it's you, we'll go with baby steps here. TIME IN Karin lets Sakura know that it's her fault Naruto's in this position. This coming from a woman who's spent the better part of 200 chapters sniffing the sweaty undergarments of the man who is responsible for the hole in her chest. She sure is one to talk about good judgment. By the way, Sakura's expression is priceless. [CENTER][IMG]http://i109.photobucket.com/albums/n72/Aceburner85/SQUINTYPOUT.png[/IMG][/CENTER] I mean what is that even supposed to be? I know I don't have much room to speak, seeing as how I read One Piece, but DAMN. Cut to the interesting characters for a bit. The Kages all receive word of the alliance and there is much rejoicing or something. End interesting cutaway, Kiba is PISSED about not getting in on the action. naruto tells him to be a man and quit his bitching. Kiba's reaction mirrors mine. Naruto has no right to tell someone to quit their bitching when he's every night post-timeskip crying into his pillow because Sasuke isn't around to touch him anymore. Karin notices his bright, warm, happy sunshine chakra and abruptly switches her creepy stalker fetish bullcrap target to Naruto. Hooray, I was just dying to see more of that. OHWAIT SHE NOTICED THE FOX ohhh noooo deep dark darkness that is dark. Some Anbu show up to tell Sai that Danzo is dead. He died the way he lived. As an unsung hero who actually used logic when decision-making. Sai declares that Root will now have to figure out what to do with the help of Kakashi, their new Hokage. Because they're allowed to decide that right then and there without any consultation or democratic process. Except OH WAIT TSUNADE IS MOVING. :O The plot thickens. Now it's less of a vapor and almost even liquid. Back in Konoha, all the unimportant side characters that everyone likes more than the mains are calling out Naruto's Romeo and Juliet no Jutsu idea. They accuse him of using this as a ploy to protect Sasuke. He responds by saying he has "no plans" to do so. Actually, I think Naruto might really be ready for Hokage. He's a born politician. Got the whole blatant lying thing down pat. Neji calls Naruto and Sakura out for not killing Sasuke in his already weakened state. Sakura justifies it by saying that Madara was there andit "wasn't that easy." I'm sorry, the correct answer was "Naruto is gay for him and I have ovaries." Naruto continues to spew a bunch of bullcrap about how the DARKNESS INSIDE has made Sasuke so powerful that I'M THE ONLY ONE WHO CAN DEFEAT HIM. I may just have to start a cliché tally. And now he's hungry, so he's headed for the Ramen shop. Ramen is for winners, Naruto. Kakashi goes to attend a meeting to be proclaimed Hokage, but GUYS WAIT TSUNADE IS AWAKE. And bedridden. And Shizune appears to be attempting to crush her ribcage with a Siesmic Hug. I'd say her time of effective leadership is about up. Meanwhile, Sasuke completes his eye transplant. Now they will bleed tears of BLACK. FEAR IT. The end.[/FONT]

[FONT="Comic Sans MS"]Akainu is supposed to be a monster. We're supposed to hate him because he's willing to go against any semblance of ethical behavior to uphold his twisted sense of "Justice". He's like Frollo from[B] Hunchback of Notre Dame[/B], he's so preoccupied with destroying everything he views as evil in the world he's blind to his own corruptness. I mean really, the guy would probably jump into a vat of magma-dissolving acid just to punch a hole in whatever half-dead, retreating pirate just pissed him off. In a way, it's kind of like what Masashi Kishimoto tried to do with Danzo. The only difference is Danzo actually had a point and ended up being less of an unforgivable monster and more of a competent and logical leader.[/FONT]

[FONT="Comic Sans MS"]Coby: Trying to talk sense into people and then pissing his pants when they turn on him since Chapter 2. Holy freaking crap, I think the printer used to produce the SJ pages with this chapter on it used testosterone for ink. It just got realER, son.[/FONT]

[FONT="Comic Sans MS"]Let's just say there's a reason the competitive crowd affectionately refers to Blissey as "Fat Pink Whore". Anyway, I think I should point out that despite the fact that Normal Types have four resistant types and no vulnerable ones, they kind of make up for it by the fact that they only have one weakness and are the only thing impervious to Ghost Type moves. Besides, teach something Screech and Return and taking Same Type Attack Bonus into account, you can just as good as ignore the rock paper scissors thing. That and they can, you know, learn other types of moves besides just Normal.[/FONT]

[FONT="Comic Sans MS"]I question the battle capabilities of a Miltank belonging to someone other than Whitney.[/FONT]

[FONT="Comic Sans MS"]Other than Victory Road, there's some Doduo and Ponyta on the route before it. They don't give quite as much EXP, though. You can also rematch anyone who's called you for a battle so far. Also, You are awesome for being the first person I know of to actually choose Totodile. The only reason I didn't is because I already have a Feraligatr on Pearl.[/FONT]

[FONT="Comic Sans MS"]Dusk Balls. I'm telling you people, Dusk Balls. Wait until 8 and they become twice as powerful as Ultras. They sell 'em in Blackthorn and several other places. Just talk to the Pokémart guy furthest from the door. I just got to Pewter City and found the guy who gives you the Rainbow Wing. I'll probably wait to go after Ho-Oh until I've beaten Red, though. I get the feeling I'll need to get my Scyther in shape for that one.[/FONT]

[FONT="Comic Sans MS"]The supposed 3D effects sound iffy, but we've come a long way since the Virtual Boy, so I'll go ahead and remain optimistic for now. Anyway, people have been speculating that it might work a little something like this: [CENTER][YOUTUBE="Actual Japanese DSi Game"]Jf8udkeVcVs[/YOUTUBE][/CENTER] I would love something like this. Just imagine playing Paper Mario on that. It would be so flippin' cool you can't stand it.[/FONT]

[quote name='Magus'][size=1][color=green]http://img341.imageshack.us/img341/5156/66086154.jpg I know I said I was done with spoilers, but I caved in, and dangit, I think I jizzed a little bit.[/size][/color][/QUOTE] [IMG]http://th05.deviantart.com/fs39/300W/f/2008/344/c/9/I_jizz_in_my_pants_by_HOLIMOUNT.jpg[/IMG] [FONT="Comic Sans MS"]Do want.[/FONT]

[FONT="Comic Sans MS"]I think we should get casting predictions out of the way right now. Rupert Grint as Ichigo Dolly Parton as Rangiku Danny DeVito as Hitsugaya (please oh please make this one happen) Buttercup of the Powerpuff Girls as Rukia Jack Black as Kyoraku Halle Berry as Yoruichi That's all I can come up with for now. Any more, guys?[/FONT]

[quote name='chibi-master']Okay. I've decided to postpone getting my last gym badge. That girl and her pokemon are a frickin' pain in the rear and I'm busy hunting down Raikou and Entei. Rawr.[/QUOTE] [FONT="Comic Sans MS"]Ice-type is murderous against everything she has (except Kingdra. You have an Ampharos or something else electric, right?). There are Shellder in Olivine if you feel like fishing, and Ice Path has Jynx and Swinub, too. Personally, I recommend the Shellder. Also, you should go ahead and keep whatever one you choose in your party. You're gonna need it for the Elite 4. I think I'm gonna go after that Snorlax in a bit. I just got the Kanto radio expansion, now I just need Kurt to make me some Heavy Balls. I just hope it doesn't use Rest too much. Ugh, what an annoying move. Also, I'm thinking of leveling up my Scyther and using it as my Capture Specialist. It knows False Swipe already, now it just needs to be able to survive Legendary encounters.[/FONT]

[quote name='RedJ'][COLOR="Red"]So, bets on how long it'll take them to make a Naruto live action movie, anyone? [/COLOR] [SPOILER]Although that might be rather hilarious to see.[/SPOILER][/QUOTE] [FONT="Comic Sans MS"]With a soundtrack consisting of those three Linkin Park songs that every anime in the world has been made into an AMV with.[/FONT]

[quote name='Gavin'][SIZE=1]Well it's taken nearly a month but I think my flu has finally dissipated. Also it seems Spring has decided to arrive, and though it's a month and a half late it's still appreciated. [/SIZE][/QUOTE] [FONT="Comic Sans MS"]Man, I always let the good back-stabbing moments slip by. So does this mean we can expect to see the rest of those awards sometime this week?[/FONT]

[FONT="Comic Sans MS"]Now that I've seen that image, I will be very disappointed if Buttercup isn't somehow involved.[/FONT]

[quote name='Sangome'][FONT="Microsoft Sans Serif"][SIZE="1"]Right now I'm on the Ho-oh battle, and [I]oh my goodness[/I] it's a pain. I'm about to give up and try it again later. I'm very much regretting making my Ampharos forget Thunder Wave in favor of Discharge...[/SIZE][/FONT][/QUOTE] [FONT="Comic Sans MS"]Smash some rocks in Cinnabar. Sometimes they have Heart Scales in them, which you can use to pay the Move Relearner in Blackthorn. I had to do the same thing after being horrified to discover that Beat Up actually sucks horribly and is a waste of my Sneasel's movepool. Some signature move. Also, I found that Dusk Balls work a lot better than Ultra Balls, but then again I was fighting Lugia, who is found in a cave. Ho-Oh is on top of the roof, right? Maybe Dusk Balls will work if you wait until nighttime. I just got to Kanto. My gosh, it's beautiful. It's so lush and detailed it puts FireRed and LeafGreen to absolute shame. It's remarkable how a single generation can make an entire region look so much better. Finally, if you don't already know, it is now confirmed that Silver (your rival) is [spoiler]the son of Giovanni[/spoiler]. Keeping that in mind, it occurred to me during the Lake of Rage incident that Rocket Executive Ariana had an awfully familiar-lookin' 'do. [CENTER][IMG]http://archives.bulbagarden.net/media/upload/b/bd/HeartGold_SoulSilver_Athena.png[/IMG][/CENTER] I think I know why she remains loyal to [spoiler]the boss[/spoiler], if ya get my drift. :whoops:[/FONT]

[FONT="Comic Sans MS"]Just about any media other than the games tend to have at least 10x the population, and that's only for the small towns like New Bark or Mahogany. Also, I've been drawing a LOT of inspiration from the Special manga, so I was kind of already working under this assumption. Question, though. Are we planning to use the Legendaries in any way here? I was going to use Eusine in my next post, and I was wondering if it was okay to include a minor Suicune sighting at the end, possibly to indicate that the Legendary Pokémon are aware of the situation. Is that kosher or should I just forget that one?[/FONT]

[quote name='KittyLynn']Keep up the good work James. This place basically raised me.[/QUOTE] [FONT="Comic Sans MS"]This very concept frightens and disturbs me. Welcome back, in any case. It's always nice to have any kind of traffic, be it brand new or returning members such as yourself.[/FONT]

[quote name='RedJ'][COLOR="Red"]Mkay, so it wont be happening this weekend due to certain events, plus the egg is being stubborn(typical Chikorita -3-) and not wanting to hatch. Next week is a possibility though, and I plan to begin negotiations for Wi-Fi over the weekend. Also, Larvitar is a besnitch to find .-.[/COLOR][/QUOTE] [FONT="Comic Sans MS"]Cool, I'll keep him in storage until you're ready for him. Though if I get bored I might name him something embarrassing just for giggles. Larvitar's in the Mountain area of the Safari Zone (Not Peak, Mountain. The distinction is very important). It's only there during Morning and Day hours, though. After hours all you'll find are bats and rats. And Magneton.[/FONT]

[quote name='r2vq'][color=#009966]Oh and for vanity's sake I was wondering what everyone's average steps per day are. So far mine are 18,000 per day. :3 -r2[/color][/QUOTE] [FONT="Comic Sans MS"]I average around 3-4,000. Mostly by attaching it to my foot and tapping steadily while playing. First day I got about 13,000, though. Most of that was probably from actually walking, even. Anyway, Red. I've got your Cyndaquil ready. He's boxed so the Pokérus doesn't immunize. Just remember to get your Pal Pad in the Pokemon Center basement and connect to the internet at least once in order to register a Friend Code. Then just let me know when you're available for trading. Alright, just got mine so anyone interested: Version: SoulSilver Name: Ace Friend Code: 4769 9698 9340[/FONT]

[FONT="Comic Sans MS"]I actually kinda likes Kisame's random "o hay I'm actually still alive" a lot more than I thought I would. As opposed to the blatant pathetic cave-in that was the mass revival at the end of the Pein arc, this one actually felt like maybe he put some thought behind it instead of just popping it in to subside the fandom rage. Not saying it's Hiromu Arakawa-level forethought, but it's definitely a step up from Kishi's regular work. Looking forward to seeing how that turns out. Lol Sakura. You cannot be a proper ninja, for you are a girl. With girly parts. Listen to your writer and stick to being breeding stock and just maybe a healer.[/FONT]

[quote name='RedJ'][COLOR="Red"]Also, Ace, I'm working on getting Wi-Fi. If I manage to get it, I'll see about that spare Chikorita.[/COLOR][/QUOTE] [FONT="Comic Sans MS"]Sweet, let me know if there's anything in particular you want in return. I should probably be getting myself a Ditto anyway, so breeding's not out of the question. I have breeding stock in both my current Typhlosion and my Feraligatr(s) on Pearl. Also, trades with me now come with free Pokérus. Because I'm nice like that. EDIT: Daily Spoils thus far: conquered Mahogany Gym to claim my 7th Gym badge, purged Goldenrod of Team Rocket. Afterwords, I participated in the bug-catching contest and claimed both victory and an awesome Scyther. No Weedles to steal my glory this time.[/FONT]