The Spectacular Professor

[FONT="Comic Sans MS"]Just watched it. Pretty damn tame for such an uproar, seriously. You can air the exact same dialogue on primetime national television. In fact, they do. Bet it wouldn't be nearly this much of an uproar if they dubbed over something live-action. Just another reason people need to start realizing that animation and comics aren't just kids' fare. DC's Dr. Light has had rape as his main shtick for a number of years now, and no one's complained about the "ruin" of Superman and Batman. And like I said, Rule 34. If you want to avoid permanent damage to your childhood, the internet is just not the place to go.[/FONT]

[quote name='chibi-master']What, you suddenly think this is a democracy?! TREASON!!![/QUOTE] [FONT="Comic Sans MS"]Fine, if you so insist. I SUGGEST this one be investigated for harboring possibly hazardous material, which there is a chance of our overlord's inclusion in.[/FONT]

[quote name='chibi-master']But...couldn't he just give the yaoi to me? I have a shrine in my closet just waiting for more.[/QUOTE] [FONT="Comic Sans MS"]Gavin, I vote this one be tried for treason. *shot*[/FONT]

[QUOTE]Yes, the trailers are funny, in a 'South Park' this-feels-so-wrong way, but it's not going to be amusing when some fourth grader Googling 'Frosty" gets schooled on everything from porn to prostitutes.[/QUOTE] [FONT="Comic Sans MS"]So, no mention of the Gangsta Charlie Brown gag dubs that have been circulating Youtube for years? Or the "Classic cartoons censored" videos? Hell, Rule 34? There's worse out there, news media. Better yet, there's worse that your children are far more likely to stumble upon. Try being consistent at the very least.[/FONT]

[quote name='chibi-master']...We were going to get Christmas bonuses? .....WE WERE GOING TO GET PAYED?! WITH MONEY?! [/QUOTE] [FONT="Comic Sans MS"]Actually, I think he was referring to that time of year where he lets us have a go at the stale Pepperidge Farms milanos.[/FONT]

[FONT="Comic Sans MS"][YOUTUBE="This is a happy place"]T_rP5SDvyKI[/YOUTUBE] It's funny AND topical. :D[/FONT]

[quote name='visualkei']I was listening to the radio the other day, and there was a discussion about whether guys have a time of the month where they feel a bit vulnerable as well. Women were calling to discuss how they noticed a pattern in their partner's moods. I'd like to hear the male point of view on this.[/QUOTE] [FONT="Comic Sans MS"]That's probably around the same time of the month. I'm assuming the "mood patterns" they're referring to are the guys recoiling in terror at their every word.[/FONT]

[quote name='chibi-master'][B]Unless you are contributing to the thread in some way, no males. No one wants to hear your insensitive and juvenile comments that usually take the form of: "woman are so stupid they don't know people only should bleed when they get hitted with manly rocket launcher lolroflcopter!1!!!" If you have something that is not insulting or sexist to add, please do so.[/B][/QUOTE] [FONT="Comic Sans MS"]I resent that comment. I like to think of women as equals. Heck, stupid girls are one of my pet peeves. As are stupid people in general. At the very least, I'd like to point out that I understand that menstruation is completely natural and would never shoot anyone with a rocket launcher, no matter how manly that rocket launcher may be. [spoiler]Must be your time of the month.[/spoiler][/FONT]

[quote name='Gavin'][SIZE=1]*Applauds* There's no such thing as too soon, after all I'm already defending him in his court case against Saint Peter to get into Heaven. Speaking of which Ace, why exactly am I working for the D.A. rather than running a gargantuan and obviously evil law firm looking to recruit and corrupt you ? [/SIZE][/QUOTE] [FONT="Comic Sans MS"]Probably for the same reason Palpatine found it easier to sabotage the universe from the inside. ON WITH THE SHOW [CENTER][SIZE="4"]- Part 8 -[/SIZE][/CENTER] The silence permeated the courtroom. There was a long pause, broken only by a cough from the Prosecutor's desk. "Well, I must congratulate you, Mr. O'Turney," sniped Gavin, "Your last moronic statement managed to silence the courtroom for so long that by now I'm sure the musical artist you referenced has died." "TOO SOON!" shouted Chibi indignantly. "Mr. O'Turney, you would do well to keep your assistant's tongue in check," said the Judge, "as for you, Mr. Zeitgeist, I must agree with her. That comment was totally uncalled for. Funny, but uncalled for." "My apologies, Your Honor," replied Gavin, bowing slightly, "however, my point still stands. Anyone could have bought that bat from any store. I'm fairly sure the Wal-Mart down the street has several boxes full. You're going to have to dig up a more secure connection than that." Ace met the objection with an obnoxious smirk. "Don't you find it odd that the police would overlook such a blatantly relevant piece of evidence during their investigation? I had someone look into it while I was... incapacitated, and it turns out that the entire investigation was done by one man." "That's remarkably inefficient," remarked Chibi. "Yes it is," Ace continued, "but apparently there are only three officers in the district and two of them were on traffic duty at the time. I think we can all agree that the final officer is extremely suspect. Your Honor, I'd like to call Detective Darren to the stand." "I'll allow it," declared the Justice, "bring him in, bailiff." The Detective slowly marched to the witness stand, ever bewildered. Taking his seat, he proceeded to look around the room as if following an invisible fly. "Did you murder Mr. Boy, Detective?" demanded Ace. "Not sure." "What do you mean you're not sure?" "Well," replied the Detective, "It was really dark and I wasn't paying much attention. See, I was playing Midnight Baseball with my nephew and-" "I'm afraid to ask, but I'm sure I have to," interrupted Gavin, "what is Midnight Baseball?" "It's baseball played at midnight, of course!" replied Darren. A collective groan escaped the mouths of the onlookers. "Is the danger of such an activity not apparent to you, Detective?" queried Ace. "Well, it is now, I guess. I heard a thud when winding up to bat, but the ball was coming right at that moment and I sent that thing flying! Then I had to leave, so I must have forgotten my bat." "So you're not with the Mafia?" inquired Ace. "Oh, no, I'm in the Mafia. Heck, I'm 'The D.' It's just that that has nothing to do with this." "Then why did you feel the need to flee the scene?" "That ball I hit damaged the statue of Naps the Cat," said Darren, "I knew how important that thing was to people and I just panicked. I guess I didn't even notice Digital Boy." Suddenly, the door burst open. "Clearly you didn't notice enough of me during the investigation, either!" Everyone turned in shock to see the apparent corpse, looking indignantly at the man on the witness stand. "Digital Boy?" said Ace, disbelief apparent in the tone of his voice, "you're alive?" "Of course I'm alive. I was never dead, just unconscious. One minute I'm walking through the park when this aluminum cylinder comes flying at me. Next thing I know, I'm waking up naked on a metal table with some guy standing over me holding a scalpel." "Too much information," stated a juror. "But just enough to wrap this case up quite nicely, I think," stated the Judge, "I'll be expecting your verdict after a fifteen minute recess, Jury. Dismissed." [CENTER]...[/CENTER] "We find the defendant, Prem, Not Guilty of all charges," the jury representative said, "We find Detective Darren Not Guilty of the murder of Mr. Tical Boy. However, he did break the statue of Naps the Cat, and that's terrible. We find him extremely guilty of that." "The Detective is sentenced to present six-gallon saucers of milk to the statue every day for the next three years," declared the Judge, "Court is adjourned." [CENTER]... [B]July 23, 2014 11:45 A.M. District Court Defendant?s Lobby No. 2[/B][/CENTER] "Impressive, Mr. O'Turney, most impressive." "Thank you, Mr. Zeitgeist," replied Ace, "So what are your plans from now on?" "I've been selected to prosecute a case against a Mr. Marley. It should be easy, apparently his defense claim is that he shot the sheriff, but he didn't shoot the deputy." "Good luck with that," said Ace, "I think I might run for office, myself. This city is in need of major improvements. It's as if every public system is completely incompetent solely for the sake of comedy." "Good luck with that, and if you ever find yourself in need of employment, I've been thinking of starting my own firm. Here," said Gavin, handing Ace a small card. "Evil Empire Attorneys at Law," Ace read, "Uh, thanks. Sounds... interesting." "Yes," said Gavin, "Interesting. Most interesting." [RIGHT][SIZE="4"]End.[/SIZE][/RIGHT][/FONT]

[quote name='Gavin'][CENTER][SIZE=1][IMG]http://punditkitchen.files.wordpress.com/2009/11/political-pictures-walmart-greeters.jpg[/IMG][/SIZE] [/CENTER] [SIZE=1] God damn it, why did nobody wave for the camera ? [/SIZE][/QUOTE] [FONT="Comic Sans MS"]Hey, those nightsticks are heavy. I could have, but that would have required me to conform to a much less efficient manner of beating your will into your lackeys. Come to think of it, that may be the reason Fernando's dead.[/FONT]

[FONT="Comic Sans MS"]Dammit, Missy. Not when I'm drinking milk. XD[/FONT]

[quote name='chibi-master'].....Why the heck would I want to be anywhere near his wrath, you fool?! :o 'Tis better to work quietly at the bottom, knowing that you are the base for the grand organization that is Gavin's Empire!:catgirl:[/QUOTE] [FONT="Comic Sans MS"]You lack ambition. It may be better for you in the long run, but it sure makes life a lot less fun.[/FONT]

[FONT="Comic Sans MS"]There's a [B]Napoleon Dynamite[/B] game for DS. You want to know how bad it is? I played it expecting nothing. I was still disappointed. The controls are horrid, the story is blah and the touch controls seem to sense a stylus and click something on the screen at random. Yeah, awful game.[/FONT]

[quote name='Raiha'][COLOR="DarkOrchid"][FONT="Times New Roman"]Oh right, and I hear that getting an erection can actually kill you, so if you have to, cut off all contact from the opposite sex.[/FONT][/COLOR][/QUOTE] [FONT="Comic Sans MS"]Well, that's kind of an extreme case that depends on how offended your girlfriend is by it. And I'm up for a Monthly thread if it gets said anti-man rage out of the PRP. :p[/FONT]

[quote name='Miss Anonymous']This whole thread needs a fat sticker on it saying "[b]TMI[/b]".[/QUOTE] [FONT="Comic Sans MS"]It's all just to welcome you home. :animesmil[/FONT]

[quote name='CaNz']oh gosh... i cant make one stupid joke Ace?[/QUOTE] [FONT="Comic Sans MS"]No, never. Actually, go ahead, but be forewarned. In some circles, I'm known as Buzzy McKillerson.[/FONT]

[FONT="Comic Sans MS"]Okay, even ignoring the fact that no one has junk enough to conceal in such a manner, I'm pretty sure that when you're in that... situation, you're gonna find it real hard to adjust angle, much less wrap.[/FONT]

[FONT="Comic Sans MS"]Ah, Herbert. I yearn for the days when you were a mildly amusing one-shot character, as opposed to one of the most prominent unfunny inside jokes [B]Family Guy[/B] has. Speaking of [B]Family Guy[/B], the current season has actually greatly improved now that Seth MacFarlane's pulled his head out of his ego and toned down the whole "Brian is always right" thing.[/FONT]

[quote name='chibi-master']*NOMs popcorn* This is freaking better than late-night television!:catgirl:[/QUOTE] [FONT="Comic Sans MS"]You do realize that the only reason you don't get this level of his wrath is because you're self-admittedly near the bottom of his minion totem pole. Just sayin'.[/FONT]

[FONT="Comic Sans MS"]I was about to question your decision to put me in charge of something you ingest regularly, given my Starscramish attitude towards the company, but then I realized that such a job would require me to taste-test, as well. I suppose I'd better get on that now, then. :animesigh[/FONT]

[quote name='Gavin'][SIZE=1]You killed Fernando ? Do you have any idea how instrumental that man was to the efficient running of the shipping department ?[/SIZE][/QUOTE] [FONT="Comic Sans MS"]he insulted your mother, milord. I'd go into detail, but I doubt you'd want his comments to be heard publicly. Besides, now you know his immortality serum was entirely ineffective against a lightsaber to the neck. Clearly his efforts were in vain. Anyway, I'm pretty sure Javier from Accounting was looking for a promotion anyway. He's good with heavy lifting, so.[/FONT]

[quote name='chibi-master']As for the immortality serum, Fernando in packaging and shipping has already invented such a thing and Gavin is immortal as it is.[/QUOTE] [FONT="Comic Sans MS"]Must be a dud, then. I killed Fernando in packaging and shipping last Thursday.[/FONT]

[quote name='chibi-master']Futile is your resistance. :whoops:[/QUOTE] [FONT="Comic Sans MS"]Strange is your choice to talk like Yoda when your employer is a Sith Lord. As for me, I'm working on an immortality serum. This can only benefit Gavin in the long run, because he'll save money on disposing of me if he never has to and, of course, he'll want the final product for himself. So basically how long I stay alive is fully a matter of when I make my move with my backstabbin' knife and whether the move is actually successful (it probably won't be.)[/FONT]

[FONT="Comic Sans MS"]I'm going to take a wild guess and say I'm not the only one who's getting tired of Naruto's whole "NO DON'T KILL SASUKE THAT WOULD BE LOGICAL AND BEST FOR EVERYONE INVOLVED" shtick that seems to pop up about once every three chapters these days.[/FONT]

[quote name='Aiwass']Perhaps the only thing you have to worry about is having such a big one that it juts out, and offends the woman you are kissing. :p[/QUOTE] [FONT="Comic Sans MS"]Which would raise the question of why she was making out with you to a degree that would cause said reaction in the first place.[/FONT]