The Spectacular Professor

[FONT="Comic Sans MS"]I theenk gramur an speling r vary importnt. Wifout dem, it wood be hard to reed stuf. I fynd it vurry annoyin wen peeple misspel evry wurd. In all seriousness, I'm not a Grammar Nazi by any means. If someone makes one little typo, I'm perfectly willing to forgive it, unless of course it's a really, really funny typo. Like the other day when I accused Anomaly of "Laying" Grand Theft Auto. However, I can't stand anything that is rife with spelling errors and grammatical fail. For example, my school's newspaper. Just about every time I get my hands on it, I read it out loud to the first person I can find, taking care to note all the fails. Seriously, it's gotten to the pointy where I can pick and choose my "favorite" journalists. I've been planning for weeks to take a red pen to one of those little things and hand it in for extra credit or something.[/FONT]

[FONT="Comic Sans MS"]Actually, it looks fine without one. Thanks![/FONT]

[quote name='Japan_86']Considering I never seen the first FMA, I am so not ready for this. I am very excited though. I am working on FMA right now as we speak. Quick question. There's already two seasons and this will be the third season coming out?[/QUOTE] [FONT="Comic Sans MS"]No need to worry about that. This series is an adaptation of the manga, which is basically an entirely different continuity. You can watch it all without having seen any of the original whatsoever. [strike]The story is infinitely better, anyways.[/strike] I only need 2 reasons to look forward to this. Their names are Olivia and Ran Fan.[/FONT]

[FONT="Comic Sans MS"]"Vic Mignogna. Now we wait for the fangirls." "This message is the only thing tethering this forum to the internet." "Clapping: it turns on lights, brings fairies back to life and even fixes household appliances!" "Heil Fuhrer Des." "All female posters are required to wear tiny miniskirts." "Dangerous criminals are your friends."[/FONT]

[FONT="Comic Sans MS"]So I've been watching [I]Avatar: The Last Airbender[/I] lately. It's a great show, and I think I want a banner for it. Specifically, I want a Toph banner. [URL="http://i280.photobucket.com/albums/kk183/camronmoris/toph.png"][COLOR="Blue"][U]Here's a picture for those of you unfamiliar with the character.[/U][/COLOR][/URL] This is just an example picture. If you can find a better one, use it. As for specifics, I think a green color scheme would be best. Keep it within OB's size regulations and I want a memorable quote from Toph printed on it. If you can't find a better one, go with "Let's break some rules!" If you can, more power to ya. Also, I probably wouldn't mind a matching avatar, if that's possible. Thanks in advance![/FONT]

[quote name='Dagger']I was going to say "the economy!" until you reminded me of this little catch. Darn.[/QUOTE] [FONT="Comic Sans MS"]Well, you could always [spoiler]kill off half the nation and make a Philosopher's Stone.[/spoiler] Come to think of it, where [I]is[/I] all this federal bailout money coming from, anyway?[/FONT]

[FONT="Comic Sans MS"]I present to you proof that the creators of [B]Avatar: The Last Airbender[/B] love their fanbase very, very much. [CENTER][YOUTUBE="Never doubt the will of Mike and Bryan"]sLI1AvPjUeQ[/YOUTUBE][/CENTER][/FONT]

[quote name='jomz']He also reminds me of starcraft - for some strange reason...[/QUOTE] [FONT="Comic Sans MS"]YOU MUST CONSTRUCT ADDITIONAL PYLONS. IN YOUR SPINAL CORD.[/FONT]

[FONT="Comic Sans MS"]Well, I'm currently preparing to witness the unadulterated win of the finale of Avatar Book 1. Might as well process this bit of fail first. Chapter 436 Ino's dad just figured out what we readers have known for months. He spends three pages discussing it only to draw the logical conclusion that Nagato is on top of Mount College Dorm, pirating radio signals to spread his propaganda. Back to the fight, or lack thereof. Time for another Pein monologue. I'm so excited. Did I mention that Naruto is bleeding? Pein says something about peace through justice, which sets Naruto off about how it's a giant load after killing all of his friends and mentors. Quick note, fox boy. There's a trope for what happened to your little buddies. It's called "Deus Angst Machina." It's a terrible plot device used by terrible writers to give their characters sudden and nonsensical motivation through a series of highly contrived events that seem to happen just so the character has something to baw about. The man to blame is Masashi Kishimoto. Sic him. Naruto and Pein exchange more dialog about how their lives both suck and justice is unfair and blah blah blah. Is it just me or does everyone in this series have something to constantly whine about? Well, I still win, because i have this entire series to whine about. So ha. While he's at it, Pein lumps a Hannibal Lecture on here about how humans are terrible and the vicious cycle of revenge will consume us all and hatred is the only constant in the universe. [CENTER][IMG]http://images.teamsugar.com/files/upl0/0/0/02_2008/Picture%2050_2.larger.jpg[/IMG][/CENTER] Oh, look. another flashback. This series never had enough of these, I tell you what. Apparently Jiraya thought that human beings could act like human beings sometimes, so there you have it. Pein is full of crap. Just like he was the last thirty eight thousand times he ran his mouth off. Thanks for reminding us, Kishi. Pein apparently founded Akatsuki in order to break this chain of hatred he keeps going on about. TIME OUT TIME OUT TIME OUT. What. How. When. FRAAAAAAAAAAAGHHHHHHHLAZZZL DOES NOT COMPUTE. Entering emergency shutdown mode. Status: read this crap yourself, I give up. Final details: Nagato is a paraplegic, malnourished radio tower who looks like Orochimaru with contacts.[/FONT]

[FONT="Comic Sans MS"]Oh, Edward. You lucky sunofagun. Sure, it cost you an arm, a leg and a brother, but plenty of peeps would love to have your skillz. Just clap your hands and the damage goes away? That would be awesome, quite frankly. So today I broke a windshield. So bad it had to be replaced. Those things are really freaking expensive. Thread topic is exactly what it says on the tin.[/FONT]

[FONT="Comic Sans MS"]I think it's fair to say that to a certain extent, no one is colorblind. people tend to flock towards familiar traits and shy away from unfamiliar ones, unfortunately. Obviously, that's going to affect how you pick and choose your friends. That being said, the man needs to shove it. The Attorney General's job is to be an adviser in legal matters. He doesn't get to advise me about how to spend my free time or who I buddy up with. Why does it seem like a lot of Obama's new recruits love pulling the race card on us?[/FONT]

[FONT="Comic Sans MS"]And that's what I love about feedback. This seems to flow much better than the other. Thanks, Shy. If there's anything else, let me know.[/FONT]

[FONT="Comic Sans MS"]I get the feeling I probably messed something up somehow here. Let me know if it needs to be tweaked. Or overhauled.[/FONT]

[CENTER][IMG]http://i228.photobucket.com/albums/ee132/Runaway511/almagest%202/Ivan_Almagest.jpg[/IMG][IMG]http://i228.photobucket.com/albums/ee132/Runaway511/almagest/leonhartavatar.jpg[/IMG][/CENTER] [FONT="Book Antiqua"]Ivan returned to school early the next morning. He staggered from the car, shuffled up the steps to his dorm, and flopped down on his bed. [B]"Rough night?"[/B] [B]"I'm tired, Elwin,"[/B] muttered Ivan into his pillow, [B]"shut up and let me sleep."[/B] [B]"Alright, I won't push it,"[/B] replied his roommate, [B]"didn't meet your uncle, then?"[/B] [B]"Just drop it, would you?"[/B] [CENTER]. . .[/CENTER] [B]"Wake up, Ivan!"[/B] Ivan heeded the warning, but not in time to dodge the chalk projectile that the teacher had hurled at him. [B]"OW! Dammit, what was that for!?"[/B] [B]"Sleeping in class, primarily,"[/B] replied the teacher, [B]"but there's also a message for you. You're wanted in the Headmaster's office."[/B] [CENTER]. . .[/CENTER] [B]"Damn that hurt,"[/B] muttered Ivan, massaging the red spot on his forehead, [B]"Would it kill her to yell?"[/B] He continued down the hall to the Headmaster's office, stopping in front of the door. [B]"Come in,"[/B] said a voice, just as Ivan was reaching up to knock on the door. Ivan entered the room. Waiting for him inside was Headmaster Moebius, as well as Leonhart Almagest. [B]"And here he is,"[/B] said Mr. Moebius, [B]"I believe this is who you were looking for, Leonhart?"[/B] [B]"What's going on?"[/B] asked Ivan, [B]What's he doing here?"[/B] [B]"Ivan, this is Leonhart Almagest,"[/B] Headmaster Moebius replied. [B]"I know who he is, dammit!"[/B] snapped Ivan, [B]Why is he here?"[/B] The Headmaster gave Ivan a stern look. [B]"It seems that you assaulted Mr. Dawlish Almagest last night during a reception aboard the [I]Alania[/I], Ivan.[/B] Ivan protested. [B]"He killed my father!"[/B] [B]"Unfortunately, revenge is not usually regarded as justification by our laws. Much less when the motive has been stale for three years. I'm afraid this is the last straw, Ivan,"[/B] said the Headmaster, [B]"We will have to expel you for this."[/B] [B]"WHAT?! I don't have anywhere to go! my mother is going to be furious!"[/B] [B]"Actually, Ivan, we've already talked to her,"[/B] said Leonhart, [B]"she agrees with the decision. Frankly, your grades have been abysmal. Diane has been having second thoughts about your future for a while now, and she thinks it's best for you to accept this proposition."[/B] [B]"Wait,"[/B] said Ivan, [B]"What proposition?"[/B] Leonhart looked startled. [B]"Didn't we tell you? You're a very lucky young man, Ivan. Dawlish nearly took you to court over this incident. I did, however, manage to convince him to let me take care of it. I've taken an interest in your case and want to see if I can help you work out this nasty little revenge issue myself."[/B] [B]"One of the most powerful men in the country is taking you under his wing, Ivan,"[/B] added the Headmaster, [B]"You should be very grateful."[/B] [B]"Ah- Lector, I wonder if there's somewhere that the boy and I can speak for a moment? Privately?"[/B] [B]"Oh, of course, Leonhart,"[/B] replied the Headmaster, [B]"I believe there is an empty classroom down the hall here. Third door on the left."[/B] [B]"Thank you,"[/B] smiled Leonhart. He led Ivan down the hall to the vacant room, shut the door and checked for possible eavesdroppers. [B]"What's this all about, old man?"[/B] [B]"Quite the tongue on you, boy,"[/B] commented Leonhart, [B]"Anyway, I must confess I have an... ulterior motive for borrowing you from your studies."[/B] [B]"It's not 'borrowing',"[/B] replied the boy, [B]"I've been expelled, remember?"[/B] [B]"Now now, young man, don't lose hope just yet. You see, we've recently discovered some documentation pertaining to some Xear artifacts. I understand that you have an unprecedented amount of experience in the field of exploration due to traveling with your late father. Since precious little is currently known about the Xear, I think that the faculty here at CHAOS might be willing to review the case of your expulsion depending on the success of this expedition. Think of it as a very, very important field trip. Are you interested?[/B] Ivan hadn't been on an expedition for three years. They were the only times he ever remembered actually being happy. Therefore, there was only one logical answer to this query. [B]"Of course I'm interested!"[/B][/FONT]

[quote name='That Second Article There']A paternity test can prove he is indeed the father of little Maisie Roxanne. "So, if I have that, they can all shut up," he said.[/quote] [FONT="Comic Sans MS"]Yep. Definitely ready for parenthood. [IMG]http://i109.photobucket.com/albums/n72/Aceburner85/Obviousavatar.png?t=1234937000[/IMG][/FONT]

[quote name='jomz']And speaking of Mr Candleman - I doubt he'll be making it to Level 4 - unless he goes around as a wax puddle... I don't know.[/QUOTE] [FONT="Comic Sans MS"]Actually, I kind of doubt that. Mr. 3's devil fruit powers are Paramecia, which affects body structure. Logia powers, like Ace's and Enel's, can become their elements. From what we've seen, he can create wax and manipulate it, but I'm pretty sure it's been stated that he can't become wax. So he'll make it to level 4, he just won't be of any use to anyone. In any case, Luffy is full-time rubber. I bet it's going to smell terrible down there before long. :p[/FONT]

[quote name='Haku877']And Sasuke was jut like Ron, idiot sidekick, and Ron is eventually gonna cut the crap, become evil, and try to be a main character.[/QUOTE] [FONT="Comic Sans MS"]Don't you taint the Weasley Name, foo'. :animeangr [SIZE="1"]Though if I had to draw a comparison with any of them... Percy is the defective moron, so he gets to be Sasuke.[/SIZE][/FONT]

[FONT="Comic Sans MS"]This is nothing. I remember this kid on [I]Maury[/I] who had a baby despite "not having sex since she was ten." Oh, damn. Did I just admit to once watching Maury?[/FONT]

[FONT="Comic Sans MS"]GKKASDJRLKWFSDLKGMASLKFMEKLFFFFFFFFFFF Folks, don't try to fight [spoiler]Asch[/spoiler] on hard mode. [spoiler]I'm dueling him, and I decide to use Radiant Howl. I activate Overlimit, go through my basic combo attack, finish it off with a Slag assault and hold X. That complete BASTARD pulls a Mystic Arte off right before mine activates, with no overlimit, level 2 Arte or warning. Not only does this kill me instantly, but it CAUSES THE GAME TO FREEZE.[/spoiler] I'm about to avenge myself. A lot.[/FONT]

[YOUTUBE]anwy2MPT5RE[/YOUTUBE] [FONT="Comic Sans MS"]This thread amuses me.[/FONT]

[FONT="Comic Sans MS"]Chapter 435 Naruto is still captured, Pein is still charging his Special Beam Cannon. I am eating an orange. This is very important, because it's more interesting than what's going on in this chapter. Apparently, though, Naruto has a plan. He begins to gather Sage Chakra, which transforms Physical Pein into a frog. A rock frog, which Naruto breaks out of. And then there was one. OR WAS THERE LOL? Yeah, he's talking about Nagato. He's still running around pulling strings. Just like one out of every three ninjas in this series. Fukusaku and Mama decide to gather Sage chakra. Then they use it to get high on mushrooms or something. Anyway, they move in to attack, as Sith pein does something. Now we cut back to Useless Town, where Shizune is still dead. I'm still enjoying this far too much. Most of the frogs have been incapacitated. It hurts quite a bit. Also, Shizune is still dead. The Village of Idiots finally decides to do something useful by tracking down Nagato. Unfortunately, Chakra now functions like a phone call. Nagato keeps changing frequencies, so he can't be traced. Have I recently mentioned how stupid everything about this series is? Fukusaku been shanked. This sets Naruto off like nothing before. INCLUDING THE DEATHS OF BOTH JIRAYA AND KAKASHI. [CENTER][IMG]http://blog.pucp.edu.pe/media/497/20070902-Facepalm1.jpg[/IMG][/CENTER] Sith Pein quickly follows up Naruto's assault with a force pull and a force choke. And a force slam-you-into-the-ground-so-hard-that-it-leaves-a-crater. He then stabs through both of Naruto's hands and traps him on the ground. This is the part, dear readers, where Pein falls victim to what I like to cal "Bond Villain Stupidity Syndrome." Now that his mortal enemy is wounded, it's time for Pein to sit there and go into a long, uninteresting monologue about his motivations. This would seem plausible if we hadn't heard it all before. Before that, though, Ino's dad has a revelation. Both of these will be resolved next chapter. Join us next week, folks. Same crap-time, same crap-thread.[/FONT]

[FONT="Comic Sans MS"]I've been haunted by the number 13 since first grade, having a last name that begins with "m." As far as I'm concerned, it's my lucky day. Doesn't make me any less cautious, though. Especially when driving. Psychological mindsets can cause people to be really stupid.[/FONT]

[FONT="Comic Sans MS"]There's a very small bit a couple of paragraphs before the arrival where Dawlish & co. board a smaller ship and dock with it. It's pretty easy to miss, but it's there. And yeah, it seems like everything checks out now. Without even requiring me to edit. Thanks, Gavin.[/FONT]

[quote name='Magus']I do think we've gotten to the point to where Black History month can be dropped, or at the very least, [B]shortened a bit.[/B][/QUOTE] [FONT="Comic Sans MS"]It's already held in February. :whoops: Anyway, I really don't care much either way. It's kind of just one of those holidays that's always there, but no one really cares. As far as I'm concerned, it's already defunct. The only way it's celebrated is through those obligatory school assemblies, anyway. Scrap it if you want, I doubt anyone would notice.[/FONT]

[quote name='James'][font=franklin gothic medium]Unfortunately also, even if Gavin reverses the post and puts something else together... that'll render Ace's subsequent post void as well, because he's just tried to follow on from it. Yuck. [/font][/QUOTE] [FONT="Comic Sans MS"]Whatever the case may be, I'll manage. I just made a copy of that one and hid it on my hard drive for use in a later situation. I'll edit it to fit when I see a chance. So do what needs to be done, I'll just roll with the punches.[/FONT]