The Spectacular Professor

@Prem: [IMG]http://i5.photobucket.com/albums/y191/sanjiscool/neutralface.png[/IMG] You just gotta... every single time...

[quote name='keitaro583']i today i gave my word to the girl that nobody would know about it and like the whole dang school knows even my friends girlfriend found and guess who leaked it? the girl herself!!!!!!!!![/QUOTE] Time to sever ties, mah boi.;)

[quote name='Indi'][COLOR="Indigo"]I thought of Gavin when I came across this joke... so with that in mind... Proof positive that Jesus was Irish: [INDENT]1) He lived at home until he was 30. 2) The night before he died, he went out drinking with his buddies. 3) His mother thought he was God. 4) He thought his mother was a virgin.[/indent][/COLOR][/QUOTE] Also, his last request was for something to drink. BUT, He could have really been Jewish, since He went into his father's business and could stretch a meal across five thousand plates. Then again, he had a Puerto Rican name. Now that that's over with: A preacher dies and goes to heaven. while standing in line at the pearly gates, he noticed the church youth group's bus driver ahead of him in line. When the driver got to the head of the line, Saint Peter wrapped his arm around the man's shoulders and pointed at a magnificent mansion on the top of a hill. "That will be your new home, my son," said Peter. This excited the preacher. After all, if a lowly bus driver got such a lavish new residence, imagine what was in store for a man of the word such as himself! As he reached the head of the line, Peter took him by the hand and indicated a small gardener's shack at the bottom of the hill. "This will be your new home, my son." The puzzled minister turned to Peter. "I have preached the good word for over 45 years and this is all I get, but a lowly bus driver lives in that wonderful mansion on top of the hill?" "I'm sorry, sir," replied Peter, "It's just that our records indicate that when you preached, people slept. However, when the bus driver drove, people prayed.

[B][center]Part Three[/center][/B] “Yes, Your Honor. The Prosecution calls Ms. Crimson Knight to the stand.” “Hey, I know her!” announced Chibi. Crimson approached the stand. She seemed a bit young to be testifying about anything special. Ace wondered what she would be speaking about. “How old is she, anyway?” Ace asked. “She’s 19,” replied Chibi, “why do you ask?” “Well, at that young it seems a little odd that they’d choose her as a witness.” “Hey, Ace! I’m 19 too! Besides, there’s a reason!” “Name and occupation,” stated Odin. “I’m Crimson Knight and I’m an aspiring writer.” “And how are you related to this case?” questioned the Judge. “Well, my dad runs the zoo in town. We own the lion that Raiha lady stole! Why would someone do something like that, anyway? It’s just weird!” “Apparently it was for a Klondike bar,” said Odin, “Thank you for your testimony, I think with this revelation we can declare a verdict. Is that alright, Your Honor?” “I don’t see why not.” the Judge addressed the Jury. “I hereby declare a brief recess. I expect the Jury to return with a verdict in 30 minutes. Court is ad-” “HOLD IT!” The Judge turned to Ace. “Yes, Mr. O’Turney?” “I haven’t cross-examined the witness yet.” “But there is no doubt left that the defendant has broken the law!” exclaimed the Judge, “Are you sure you want to go through with this?” “The defense maintains its right to cross-examine the witness.” “Very well, Mr. O’Turney. Carry on.” “Thank you, Your Honor.“ Ace turned to the witness. “Ms, Knight, may I question you as to the status of the lion in question?” “Freddy?” asked Crimson, “Well, he’s getting kind of old. Dad says we may have to put him down soon. I’ll miss him, I know. Why?” “I’m asking the questions here, Miss. Now, do you know my client?” “Yeah, she works at dad’s zoo part-time.” Ace turned to Raiha. “Is that true?” Raiha nodded. “Now, Ms. Knight, has my client ever worked with the lions?” “All the time, why?” “You’ll see.” Ace turned to the Jury. “Ladies and gentlemen of the Jury, until know we’ve been operating under the assumption that my client did all of this with a Klondike bar as her only motivation. However, with this new testimony, I maintain that my client did nothing wrong! Knowing that Freddy the Lion would soon be no more, she started to seek a suitable way to say farewell. When this dare came around, she saw the perfect opportunity to give an old, dying lion a fitting goodbye. The Klondike bar was just an added bonus! Furthermore, a lion in Freddie’s condition would have never been able to cause any injuries in such an unfamiliar location! Nothing further, Your Honor.” “In that case,” began the Judge, “I would like to call a 30 minute recess. Jury, please ready your verdict at this time.” [center][B]June 13th, 2014 11:00 A.M. District Court Defendant Lobby No. 4[/B][/center] “Wow,” said Ace, “that was a close one. Did I get it right?” “Not at all,” replied Raiha, “I did it for the Klondike bar and that’s all. Impressive how you pulled that off, though.” “You seriously did all that for ice cream?” “No, I did it for an ice cream sandwich. Stop exaggerating,” Raiha muttered sarcastically. “What movie did you go to see?” “Jumanji.” “Bet Freddie loved that.” “Like a kid in a candy store. Lions love Robin Williams.” Ace thought about that for a second. He couldn’t see why the statement would be inaccurate, so he decided not to say anything. [center][B]June 13th, 2014 11:30 A.M. District Court Courtroom No. 4[/B][/center] “Has the Jury reached a verdict?” inquired the Judge. “Yes,” said the foreman, “We the Jury find the defendant… Kind of innocent.” The Judge was obviously confused. “Please, elaborate.” “While her intentions may have been noble and no harm came of the incident, there is still a specific law against what was done. Therefore, we recommend a small penalty.” “Very well. The court rules mostly in favor of the defendant. A fine of 5 dollars will be charged. I personally will pay the fine since even I can’t believe I’m handing down such a minimal penalty. Court is dismissed.” [center][B]June 13th, 2014 11:45 A.M. District Court Defendant Lobby No. 4[/B][/center] “Nice job half-losing the case there,” quipped Raiha. “Hey, I got you off, didn’t I?” replied Ace, “You didn’t even have to pay the five bucks. What a great Judge!” “Whatever. I’ve got places to be,” said Raiha, turning to leave. “Hold it! We haven’t discussed my bill yet.” “The check’s in the mail. See ya!” Ace was somewhat relieved at this. Still, they hadn’t actually negotiated a price yet. There was still reason to worry. “Mr. O’Turney, may I have a moment?” Ace turned. “Oh, Prosecutor Yggdrasill!” “Just call me Odin.” “Fair enough. Call me Ace. What is it?” “I just wanted to congratulate you on your defense today,“ replied Odin, “I also wanted to ask you a rather… Personal question, if you don’t mind.” “That would depend on the question.” “I just want your thoughts on this: What does being a lawyer mean to you?” Ace thought for a moment. “Getting rich really fast by helping people avoid the consequences of their actions.” “Oh, never mind,” sighed Odin, turning to leave, “I’ll just be in my office downtown, losing faith in humanity.” “Ha ha! Capitalism,” said Phil. [center][B]June 17th, 2014 9:00 A.M. Law offices of Dewey, Cheatem and Howe Ace's Office[/B][/center] A depressed Ace looked down at the letter in his hand. [FONT="Palatino Linotype"]Dear Lawyer Guy. Enclosed is a check for six hundred dollars. That ought to be enough to cover some groceries and maybe rent for the month. Or blow it on video games or something. I don’t care. Sincerely, [I]Raiha[/I] P.S.: This is what you get for trying a case without first negotiating a price. I suggest you get a new client pronto.[/FONT] [B][SIZE="3"][center]-End Case 1-[/center][/SIZE][/B] [SIZE="1"]There you have it. The end. I'm still negotiating the plot for case 2, so it may be a while. Also, for anyone wondering about this "Phil" guy, I couldn't resist paying homage to Harvey Birdman. Tell ya friends!:animesmil[/SIZE]

So I checked out Lupin III's abridged series the other day. That one is amazingly good. I may have to actually watch the show now.

[quote name='Sabrina'][FONT="Tahoma"]o_O And if I ever needed a reason to not bother to finish reading the series... that is it. I'm beginning to think that other than a rare few out there, gentlemen just don't exist anymore.[/FONT][/QUOTE] Eh, it's not so bad. Not very descriptive. The makey-outeyness does tend to go a bit overboard in the last 2 books, though.

[quote name='Allamorph'][FONT=Arial]Whatever happened to the part where you get to know them, and not just how they taste?[/FONT][/QUOTE] Keep forgetting you don't read Harry Potter. As for the subject, no. She's obviously not worth it. I mean, I assume you didn't know each other very well, so there's your first sign. She shouldn't be willing to make out with a guy she hardly even knows. On top of that, it pretty much sounds like you turned into her backup plan real quick-like. You want to be emotionally attached to someone who's gonna yank you around like that? Didn't think so. Just say nay.

I'm going to make a special request right now: [B][I][U][SIZE="4"]DO NOT SPOILER TAG THE NAME OF THE ANIME/MANGA IN WHICH THE DEATH OCCURS.[/SIZE][/U][/I][/B] Now that I've gotten your attention, I'm serious here. I just got spoiled big time for not knowing which series above poster was referring to. No hard feelings, though.[COLOR="Indigo"][SIZE="1"][INDENT]I fixed that for you. The level of spoiler in the previous post, pity it's too late. ~Indi[/INDENT][/SIZE][/COLOR]

So here it is. This is really good! Looks like it'll be plenty of fun. I'm definitely going to be following this one both because I'm sure I'll enjoy it and I need to do some research for my project as well. Keep it up!

[quote name='Korey'][FONT="Franklin Gothic Medium"]Man, who says we can't just get along? Sarcasm is a lost art these days. :animesigh[/FONT][/QUOTE] Oh, it's not lost, it's just hard to convey through text on the internet.:p Anyway, I'm mostly an adventure/action gamer myself. I also play a fair amount of RPGs and dabble in Fighting games. Mostly just Smash Bros. and Soul Calibur, though.

Far as I know, the more sophisticated and complicated editing features are still being restricted to MyO. That being said, you can still make a pretty decent looking World with what's there right now.

[quote name='Indi'][COLOR="Indigo"]Now, back on track people, it's not that hard to respond to a post [I]without[/I] insulting someone else in the process. Show a little maturity please.[/COLOR][/QUOTE] Where were you when Allamorph told me I suck?:p [SIZE="1"]Of course, I was jokingly slamming Masahiro Sakurai for being a non-native English speaker at the time...[/SIZE] As for topic, I consider myself a huge nerd. Heck, I even call myself a nerd. I display a lot of the characteristics, such as high math scores, playing video games whose titles don't begin with "Grand" and end with "Theft Auto" and a general fascination with technology. Despite all this, I remain somewhat popular at school and in most places I regularly visit. Guess I'm one of them cool nerds.

[quote name='Drizzt Do'urden']And specifically to the personwho called my first post a "stupidly low blow". I may have choosen the easy way out in my initial comment. But you ^&*% sure better belive its how the white working class feels.[/QUOTE] What, WHA!? Uh, no, dude. I was referring to the quote by Hillary Clinton contained in your initial post. Sorry for the confusion.:animeswea

[quote name='Sandy'][IMG]http://i30.photobucket.com/albums/c323/SamSandy/3-1.png[/IMG][/QUOTE] Sorry, Sandy. That's not a ladder. [IMG]http://i109.photobucket.com/albums/n72/Aceburner85/apollo-confidentc.gif[/IMG] It's an extension ladder! As for the actual topic, Out of the 2 Democrats, I'd definitely prefer Obama. Besides that stupidly low blow the original poster mentioned, Clinton seems to have a track record of changing her mind more often than the average Star Wars character has a bad feeling about something. Pretty much balances out Obama's inexperience nicely. That said, I wish there was more people could do than vote for the lesser of 2 evils these days. Good thing I can't vote yet.:p

"Man, what a pain," thought Russ. He and Guilmon had been out foraging when Flymon caught up with them. They hadn't found anything, so digivolving was out of the question and he didn't want to return to Rem empty-handed with an enraged 6 foot bee in tow. "You sure you're out of energy, big guy?" "I'm surprised I can still run," replied Guilmon. "Is this it, then?" "I hope not. We don't even know who's pulling the strings here. Hey, Russ, let's see if we can lose him in that bush there." They dived into the bush. No luck. Flymon was on top of them in no time. However, there appeared to be some apples lying on the ground. Russ grabbed one and tossed it to Guilmon. Guilmon caught it and swallowed. "How is it, Guilmon?" "Tastes like crap," Guilmon panted, "Meat apples need to be cooked." "Think you can manage you-know-what?" "No problem. Guilmon digivolved to... Growlmon!" The gigantic dinosaur threw back its head. "Pyro Blaster!" The shot grazed Flymon's wing. It was enough. Flymon buzzed away, shrieking in pain. Growlmon's usual degeneration occurred, then something odd happened, the process continued. When he was done, Russel was once again staring at Gigimon. "Crap. You lied, didn't you? You had to use up some extra energy. I hope we're not in any more immediate danger..." Suddenly, he heard a noise. Looking up, he saw a yellow humanoid fox standing on a tree limb. He stared at her for a second. Then she stared back. "Diamond Storm!" Russ could barely dodge the attack. This was no good. Gigimon couldn't do anything at all and there was nowhere to run. "Psst, in here!" Russ looked at the spot where the sound came from. He saw what appeared to be a lion's paw waving at him. This made him a bit hesitant, but then he remembered the immediate threat of the fox and figured he had nothing to lose. He dove into the bush. As soon as he entered, the caller jumped out. He nearly laughed. It appeared to be a calico cat with lion gloves on! The mysterious stranger soon proved herself to be quite formidable, though. "Meatball Punch!" A dead hit. The fox made a dignified retreat. "There, that ought to hold her off for now," muttered the feline. Russ was a bit confused. "Sorry, who are you, who was that and why are you helping me?" "Oh, right. I suppose I owe you an explanation, at least. I am [URL="http://digimon.wikia.com/wiki/Mikemon#Mikemon"][U]Mikemon.[/U][/URL] That was Renamon, she's one of Lord Boogeymon's strongest minions. I am the leader of a group devoted to seeing Boogeymon dethroned. We've been waiting a long time for you and the other children." A large ensemble of digimon emerged from the surrounding foliage. "Welcome to the Digimon Resistance."

[quote name='SunfallE'][COLOR="RoyalBlue"][FONT="Lucida Sans Unicode"]And that would be me CrimsonKnight since I handle approving quizzes when the system is up and running. ^_~ [/FONT][/COLOR][/QUOTE] So [I]you're[/I] the Guru everyone talks about! Curse you, Guru...:p

I just find it odd that anyone can express such distaste in a series with characters like Fred and George Weasley in it. Yeah, though. I understand how you feel about book 5, Sunfall. Rowling herself admitted she left too much filler in that one and would definitely condense it if she had the chance to rewrite it. Book 7, though... Best in the series. As per Allamorph's recommendation, I'm about to place an order for one of the James Bond books at my library. I think I have one lying around in my room somewhere, too.

[quote name='8bit'][FONT="Tahoma"][COLOR="DimGray"]I liked Eragon! It was no Wheel of Time but I liked it. Of course, I've also never seen Star Wars Episodes IV, V and VI. :whoops:[/COLOR][/FONT][/QUOTE] [IMG]http://i109.photobucket.com/albums/n72/Aceburner85/apollo-ohnoes.gif[/IMG] You need to rectify this mistake immediately! That's like living in New York without having ever seen Ghostbusters! [quote name='Allamorph]The world of [I][U]Eragon[/U][/I] itself didn't bother me. I thought it was a rather good concept, regardless of how many people claim Paolini borrowed and stole from other series. (Honestly, who doesn't?) My bone is that Paolini [I]himself[/I'] is immature. His story flow is highly erratic and left me in a constant state of "what-is-going-on??", his imagery is extremely clichéd—I was told he has the exact same scene in all three books—and the maximum length of his chapters is eight pages. It's like he wrote little scenes and called them chapters, and then decided to merge one or two chapters together and call them scenes. o_O[/quote] Has he released the third book yet? I hadn't thought he did, but I may be wrong. Anyway, I thought it was decent when I first read it. I think that was back in 7th grade, though. I'll bet if I read it again, I'll see what you mean. Eh, I'll probably go ahead and track down that third book just for completion's sake. I can't stand it when I never get to know the ending. Unless I'm watching Surviving Christmas. I wish I had the sense to walk out of the theater after the only funny part of the movie. [quote name='CrimsonKnight'][COLOR="Blue"]p.s. aceburner, i like your avatar now. it's um, well different. tell me, why did you pick that one out of all the others to choose from?:confused: No offense at all.[/COLOR][/QUOTE] Oh, you mean Vera here? [IMG]http://otakuboards.com/customavatars/avatar27290_7.gif[/IMG] Well, She's also an Ace Attorney character. I found that particular picture in a webcomic made by someone on Livejournal. Besides the fact that I like the character, the "LOL" gag was just too great to pass up.

[quote name='Odin M Yggdrasi']And why the heck is it always Mayor Wallace or Mayor Wilson? I think every single Mayor I know of has been a Wallace or Wilson. [/QUOTE] Once again, I just pulled one out of thin air. I guess it just sounded good. Glad the mob boss line went over well.

Falcon... BUUUMP! [YOUTUBE="Dan Green Presents: Abridging 101"]EVsz9KBSQ8Q[/YOUTUBE] [YOUTUBE="Dan Green vs. The Spiderwick Chronicles"]TmuhiGGq6rQ[/YOUTUBE] Littlekuriboh does it again. These are hilarious. I also appreciated the EBA cameo.

[quote name='Aaryanna_Mom']What an amusing thread and concept. I have only one question since it seems you are using members from the site for the story, and that is to wonder if by Kathy Anna you are actually referring to me? Or is there another Kathy here at OtakuBoards that I am unaware of? Anyway, it was interesting and fun to read.[/QUOTE] Yeah, that's you. I figured Aaryanna Mom would be a kind of weird name (then again, I went ahead and used chibi-master's full screenname,) So I used your first name and decided that if I gave your daughter a part later on, her name would be Aary. Weird, huh?

[quote name='Octopus Royalty']I play my gamecube, which lately seems like it's had about enough. I may have to just get rid of it...:animedepr[/QUOTE] I could give you a list of must-haves that you are required to play before getting rid of the thing. If you haven't played them all, I suggest if you sell it, keep a controller and memory card and use the money towards a Wii (if you can afford it.) Most of my leisure time involves the computer. I hang with my friends sometimes, too, but we usually just end up playing Brawl or something. We used to have these awesome stick/fist duels, but we don't do that much anymore. We should set up a soft-contact sparring match for fun sometime.

[quote name='Gavin'][SIZE="1"]If this ever happens, I'd like to be either Judge or Prosecutor, preferably the former.[/SIZE][/QUOTE] I've considered you as a prosecutor before, just so ya know. So much edited star Wars dialog potential... (that wouldn't be all, but it would be present.) As for the Chewbacca Defense gag, I may try to work it into Case 2 if I can find a spot to fit it into. Case 2 is going to get pretty zany.

[quote name='Gavin'][SIZE="1"]Anyway, not a bad second chapter Ace, for some unknown reason I heard Cartman's voice giving that speech of yours, it just seemed like something he'd try.[/SIZE][/QUOTE] Haha, really? Want me to try the Chewbacca Defense next time?:p

[quote name='Shy'][size=1]I kind of like [B]Sandy's[/B] OB court idea. It's very similar to an RPG I'm thinking about launching, heh. -Shy[/size][/QUOTE] [quote name='Sandy'][B]Inspired by [url=http://otakuboards.com/showthread.php?t=59006][U]Aceburner's fanfic on the Anthology[/U][/url] (all props to him),[/B] I'd like to suggest an [B]OtakuBoards Trial[/B][/QUOTE] :grumble: Kidding, Kidding. I was kind of thinking of RPG ideas for that kind of thing, too. I'll make sure to be a part of that if it happens. As for Prem's committee idea, I'd say it might be a better idea to find other members to collaborate with and form a committee and then pitch the idea and have other members vote on whether they want it to be an Event. Also at Prem: [spoiler]come on, man. Just join the club already. You know you want to.[/spoiler]