Allamorph

[FONT=Arial]Yeah, Miles is an interesting guy. Hard, free stuff. You like him, though, you might also want to check out Charlie "The Bird" Parker.[/FONT]

[FONT="Arial"]Which part? The apathy, or the learning graphic design? =P[/FONT]

[quote name='Boo][size=1']... Ironically it seems to die sooner as soon as people actually have the choice to do their piece. ¬_¬'[/size][/quote] [FONT=Arial]Makes sense to me, though. It's the open-ended aspect that kills it; once you have the knowledge that you can just jump in if you feel like it, without the sense of urgency that comes with holding someone else up from their turn, the pace naturally slows down. With the list, you say you want to do a piece, and you're on. If something comes up when your turn comes around, you can skip if necessary, and the next person can go. But with the Claim system, the structure becomes so lax that it invites apathy. Too bad I can't join in myself; I'll figure out how to do this stuff one of these days. >_>[/FONT]

[FONT="Arial"][CENTER]Road Time-weathered; Level Guides its charges to their journey's end. The soothing sound of rubber on pavement. Mediator[/CENTER][/FONT]

[FONT=Arial]If I may add to the discussion here.... [quote name='sbsp13668;][FONT="Comic Sans MS"][COLOR="Navy"]Lastly, MyOtaku acted as a home to several members, expecting them to leave those memories and friends to make Worlds isn't fair.[/COLOR'][/FONT][/quote] Do you mind if I make a quick analogy? Because I don't agree with that sentiment at all; not about the home part, but about the leaving. When I was in the fifth grade, the plant my father worked at began laying off employees left and right because of financial concerns. My father had almost ten years on the job, but he wasn't sure that even tenure would protect him after long, and so he began searching elsewhere. He found another job in about three months. The job offer was in Tennessee. We lived in South Carolina at the time. So we moved. When we got there, and bought a house, we had no clue how the town worked. We had to spend the next few weeks learning all the little things: public trash pickup, and what day it came on; where the supermarkets, churches, utilities, and the library were; how the streets flowed together, especially in our neighborhood, where people from the other side of town tended to get lost; what school zones we were in. We didn't get the option to "keep things the same". We had to change. And the memories we had at our old home? We [I]kept[/I] them. That's what memories are. That's what they're there for. They're not dependent on the environment they happened in, because they exist in the minds and hearts of the [I]people[/I] they happened to. No one is asking you to leave memories behind. Honestly, that's physically impossible. However, you [I]are[/I] being given the opportunity to make [I]new[/I] memories. Take advantage of it. [INDENT][I]Make new friends, [U]but keep the old.[/U] One is Silver, and the other Gold.[/I][/INDENT] —A[/FONT]

Resources The blue man followed the dirt trail until it turned to angle back towards the Capitol. He couldnâ??t use the same entrance he had taken Adrian through to return, he knew, so he began to mull over which other alternate was best, folding his arms over his chest and rising to hover a few inches off the ground, in lieu of walking, while he retraced his path. Even though Nathan was certain that none of his alternate routes were known, pulling three people through that last one would have caused a much larger energy fluctuation than they were intended for; he doubted that the variation would show up as much more than a small tic to any of the Monitors, but even so, two tics in the same location within a very short time span was too risky to Nathanâ??s mind. Ideally he should cross back either very close to the first entrance or as far away as time permitted, but if he used a portal too close, the chance was too great that the Monitor watching that sector might call for an equipment check, and if nothing was discovered.... Farther was better, this time, he decided as he reached the outskirts of the city. He had a gate set up a few klicks to the southwest that he hadnâ??t used in almost two and a half millennia. It would do nicelyâ??but doing so meant he had to cross through the city itself. Nathan hated the Capitol. Every time he came he felt the same discomfiture, the same out-of-placeness that he hadnâ??t been able to shake since the end of the War. Back on Earth he still felt it to some small degree, but never as acutely as when he was among members of his own kind. He walked the streets with his gaze turned inward and his aura wrapped tightly about him, willing the Reapers he passed to look through him, to see him without seeing, and he navigated the path to the other side from sense and memory rather than sight. His goal lay in the center of a stand of deciduous trees outside the Capitol, close to the edge of the forest that marked the Capitolâ??s southern boundary. Once clear of the streets, he reached it quickly, opening the gateway with practiced ease and sliding through. He emerged in an alley near the center of the city where he worked. A residual shiver ran through him, left over from the shock of dimensional travelâ??and his pocket vibrated with him. Curious, he drew out his device and examined it; apparently Lucia wished to see him about something involving their recent experience with the Count. She had said nothing further, nor had she included any sense of urgency, so Nathan added her place to his list of stops to make and, after checking to make certain he was invisible, set off for Alexâ??s residence. ---------------------- He liked Alexander Maâ??Shala, Victor decided. He was a very pleasant and courteous young boy, and engaging to talk to, though perhaps a bit on the nervous sideâ??a trait Victor was more than willing to ascribe to naïveté and inexperience. Victor counted himself fortunate to have met the boy so quickly after his initial exposure to vampires. It made dispelling all that nonsense about blood-sucking, vicious, maniacal fiends with delusions of grandeur so much easier. A pity that heâ??d had to deal with this Count person, though. Victor had been watching him for several years now, and had been growing more and more suspicious that the arrogant bastard was planning on trying something stupid. He hadnâ??t expected such a bizarre play as actively kidnapping a shinigami and using her as a trap; hadnâ??t the fool known the War had been over for more than three thousand years? And besides, taking on the shinigami openly was one of the most foolhardy decisions a single individual could make. In Victorâ??s opinion, the idiot had deserved to die. He only wished Nathan had administered the coup de grâce himself. Still, despite Alexanderâ??s inexperience, it was plain heâ??d been invaluable to the defeat of the moron. Nathan had been right to trust his comrades, it seemed; all of them had their unique talents, whether they realized it or not. And of course that meant that they each merited a deeper looking at, for posterityâ??s sake. Later, of course. Victor had something else he wished to look into. The vampire had left his friendâ??s apartment only a few minutes after the boy had departed in the custody of that impertinent werecat that Nathan insisted on hanging about with. All these millennia, and Victor still couldnâ??t fathom why someone so completely and delightfully ridiculous would desire a companion almost the exact opposite to himself. The fact that she harbored a distinct and unshakable antipathy towards the vampire made her presence even more aggravating; despite all his efforts, Victor had been utterly incapable of bringing her around. Victor had had an appointment to keep, as well, and since it had been obvious that Nathan would not be returning forthwith, the vampire had taken his leave. Once back at his keep, heâ??d enjoyed a pleasant salad for lunch, with a few strips of tender chicken; his chef, at least, was to be counted among the few good hired hands he still possessed. After lunch, he had dismissed his aide and retired to his bedroom. Once alone, he stood a moment in front of the full length mirror on the left wall, close to the rear of the room, and made a quick sign in the air. The glass shimmered in response, and Victor stepped quickly through, closing off the tesseract behind him. He now stood in a small room about the size of a washroom; what appeared to be communication equipment of some kind stood out from one of the long walls, complete with multiple panels of touchpads and several screens above that displayed a steady stream of lights, charts, and rotating shapes. Pulling out a rolling chair from in front of the consoleâ??s center, Victor sat, a stroke from his hand bringing the console to life. He touched a quick pattern into a pad to his left, tweaked a dial, and waited. He was rewarded a few seconds later. â??Hello, Victor.â? A screen near the bottom of the array pulsed as the words were spoken, evidently displaying sound vibrations. â??Itâ??s been a while.â? â??Yess, it hass,â? the vampire agreed. â??But tsen, tsings have been tsomewhat quiet on tsis side of mortality.â? â??I usually find that to be an ill omen.â? Victor smiled. â??You would be right tsis time, Iâ??m afraid.â? He leaned back in his chair. â??Iâ??m tsure you have heard of tse little fiasco tsat happened not a day past?â? â??Iâ??ve been informed that someone got ideas.â? â??Yess...in a manner of speaking.â? Victor laughed. â??Tse fool had tse audacity to openly shallenge tse shinigami. Needless to tsay, he did not tsurvive for long.â? â??A brazen move,â? replied the voice. The speaker paused briefly. â??Did he have any important connections, anyone who might be more cause for concern?â? â??Tse tsought had occurred to me. I will be looking into it myself; anotser war would be disastrous, espetsially now.â? â??Indeed.â? Again there was silence. â??This might be unrelated,â? the speaker continued, â??but there were some interesting anomalies in the Monitorsâ?? data today. Nothing that would be considered important, of course, but I thought themâ??well, see for yourself.â? A screen to Victorâ??s right flickered and altered, changing to display a stream of peculiar symbols. They scrolled rapidly down the screen, then froze, and three or four of the symbols around the screen began flashing. â??You donâ??t tsay,â? murmured Victor, studying the screen with fascination. â??I wondered why tse data had stopped transmitting.â? â??I thought it a little big for our friend.â? â??No,â? the vampire answered, â??he was bringing guests wiss him, I tsink. Iâ??m tsertain youâ??ll find out eventually, but it is not tsomting to be overly contserned about.â? â??Iâ??ll take your words for it, then.â? â??Very good. Now,â? Victor began, â??I believe you tsaid you had tsometing important to tell me?â? â??Yes, I did. You might want this on record....â? ---------------------- As Nathan approached Alexâ??s place, he began to notice a few unfamiliar presences around the boy and the two familiars. He wasnâ??t concerned at allâ??the aura of another shinigami was unmistakableâ??but his curiosity was aroused, and he landed at the door instead of ghosting straight in. His knock was answered quickly, and the door was opened by a very calm, very friendly, and very strange shinigami with two little dragon-like creatures hovering by his shoulders. The two reapers stared at each other for a short moment. â??Alex?â? they called in unison.

[FONT=Arial]Very nice "sex"-quain there, ma'am. [I]*ducks*[/I] But yeah, I know what you mean.[/FONT]

[FONT=Arial]I am [I]so[/I] going to get killed for this.[/FONT] [CENTER][YOUTUBE="Chocolate Rain"]EwTZ2xpQwpA[/YOUTUBE][/CENTER]

[FONT=Arial]As far as I remember, quatrains either rhyme alternating lines, adjacent pairs of lines, inside/outside lines (abba), or even-numbered lines (abcb). But we'll go with Sabrina's definition since .... it's her game. Like, duh. And Raiha, quatrains do extend to cover Iambic Pentameter, since you mentioned it. :smirk: Also: [quote name='Sabrina][FONT="Arial"][URL="http://www.otakuboards.com/showthread.php?t=58908"][U]indifference vs. SunfallE[/U][/URL'][/FONT][/quote] Ha! Ha haaa!! :D[/FONT]

[FONT=Arial]Shlum can be substituted for or in almost any word, but it is almost exclusively limited to the first syllable; instant shlummaging, for instance, or shlumtastic. Some words, like "carton", defy the shlum. They are identified as non-shlummable. Shlum is mostly a verb or an adjective/adverb, although humorous times can be had from consuming a bag of potato shlums. Other than that, I'm shlum out of ideas at the moment. In the words of Johnny Storm; "Shlum On!!"[/FONT]

[CENTER][FONT="Arial"]Eye Unique; Personal Gaze; Flit; Pierce Show me Who you are Soul window[/FONT][/CENTER]

Due to extensive conversations I have had with [COLOR=Indigo]Indi[/COLOR], and to a lesser degree with Rach, I think it would be wise to begin expanding on the different types of familiars. At present, we have two dragon species (land and sea); as well as faerie-folk; and Karl and Isen, whom Indi and I firmly believe are werecats. Given recent glimpses of characters to come, and also some further exploration into certain characters' pasts, I feel we may be drawing even more extensively on various creatures of lore to include. Elemental spirits, for instance, have come up, and where there are werecats there surely must be werewolves. Also, we have the options to include naiads, dryads, gryphons, and so on, and we may also let the vampires have their chance at copyingâ??the banshee, incubus, and succubus present themselves, and we can surely not forget the witch coven(s), or other creatures of nightmares. The major idea there is similar to Tolkien's idea on how the goblin, orc and troll were introduced as bastardizations of the hafling (hobbit), elf, and dwarf respectively; vampires would have seen the advantage the Shinigami had by taking familiars, and would conceivably have tried to either rip off copies, force subjugation, or make their own versions. I believe I have gained a remarkable insight into the sociological tendencies of Karl and Isen's species, just from bouncing ideas around with Indi about our similar characters. Knowing these others, and whether we wish to incorporate them, seems only logical, and also might be great fun.

[quote name='Clurr][FONT="Arial"']Not telling you about what? D:[/FONT][/quote] [FONT=Arial]Details, details!! >_< When, where, what venue; you know, for us lazy people who don't check their site. :([/FONT]

[FONT=Arial]And you're not telling us about it? Not fair, Clurr. Not fair.[/FONT]

[quote name='Sabrina][FONT="Tahoma"']*looks at Sir Allamorph who has yet to sign up* :p[/FONT][/quote] [FONT=Arial]You ? eh ? wha ? ?!?[/FONT] [CENTER][IMG]http://icanhascheezburger.files.wordpress.com/2007/06/headdesk.jpg[/IMG][/CENTER]

[FONT=Arial]Valentine's Day morning saw me laughing uncontrollably for three solid hours. That was [I]hilarious[/I]. Especially considering it completely blew [COLOR="DarkRed"]Rach[/COLOR]'s train of thought for his post in Almagest, and how [I]he[/I] spent two hours banging his head on his desk.[/FONT]

[SIZE="1"][align=justify]By the time Adrienne had arrived at the store, she had realized that she really wasn?t sure what kind of supplies to pick up for her new houseguest?the second in two days!?or even if she should get any at all. The woman had had barely a scratch on her body by the time Andras had laid her on Adie?s couch, and Adie was certain she had seen at least four broken bones on her back in the alley, along with a nasty-looking gash on her head. And those unnerving red lines that Adie had seen running up and down the woman?s skin had almost vanished as well; but even if they hadn?t, Adie wouldn?t have known what on earth to do for them. Eventually she had simply decided to buy a couple packs of gauze bandages and a few odd items that happened to catch her eye, and then had gone to a small clothing outlet, where she?d run into yet another dilemma; Adrienne had no idea about the woman?s taste in fashion. In another second she?d realized how pointless that concern was, and had quickly snagged two fairly well-coordinated outfits, some undergarments (Andras? gentlemanly ?assessment? had crossed her mind), and a pair of simple grey jogging shoes. While so occupied, Adrienne had begun to wonder what the woman?s story would be, and if she had somewhere to stay as well. Adie hoped so, but seriously doubted the possibility. They?d found her lying naked in an alley, after all, and she had certainly not behaved like a rape victim. Adrienne had sighed. One unexpected, albeit slightly charming, houseguest was an adventure in itself; the prospect of two, and for who knew how long, promised to be very disorienting. Even more bizarre was the remarkable coincidence that she and Andras?and possibly the woman, now that Adrienne thought about it?each possessed a unique gift that set them apart from all other people. Adie thought it strange enough that she had her ability in the first place. The sheer odds of finding more like her were...well, she hadn?t even remotely considered them. Her thoughts raging, she had quickly finished the important shopping and headed for a local art supply dive before returning to the apartment. [CENTER]---------------[/CENTER] [FONT="Arial"]OOC: Don't ask why this wasn't up Friday. I don't really know.[/FONT][/align][/SIZE]

[FONT=Arial]And that's why I try to stay out of conversations until I know what the frill I'm talking about. (^_^)[/FONT]

[quote name='XKaoriChanX'](I'm up to The Tower of Owen part which I keep dying on the Boss Medusa :animesigh)[/quote] [FONT=Arial]Yep, [COLOR="DarkRed"]Ace[/COLOR] is right; according to my sources, The Tower of Owen is a FFIII map. :D[/FONT]

[quote name='Sabrina][FONT="Tahoma"]I know I'd [U]secretly[/U'] be using it all the time if there was one. Hehe! :catgirl:[/FONT][/quote] [FONT=Arial]How would that work, exactly?[/FONT]

[FONT=Arial]I'm not a big April Fool's celebrator; if I get hit with an amazing Idea, I run with it after rubbing the sore spot, but otherwise I just pass it by. But I just got sent this article by Dan Miller, concerning said Fool's Day. Have a look. [QUOTE][FONT="Arial"][align=justify]Yes, this is April 1st, and you know what that means. No, I won’t be promoting any prank or hoax here. I’ve learned too well that with any conceivable distortion, someone will actually believe it. A few years ago I announced that since I was getting all these letters from Nigeria promising me money, I would simply divide it up and send it to our readers. I was deluged with letters thanking me in advance, letting me know that now they would be able to pay the rent, or that their prayers had been answered. Yessiree—it cured me of ever using satire or cynicism in something I print. I do, however, still find some of the great hoaxes amusing—and trust that most of you do as well. Here are just a few of the most famous April Fool’s pranks: [list][*]In 1992 National Public Radio's Talk of the Nation program announced that Richard Nixon, in a surprise move, was running for President again. His new campaign slogan was, "I didn't do anything wrong, and I won't do it again." [*]In 1996 the Taco Bell Corporation announced that it had bought the Liberty Bell and was renaming it the Taco Liberty Bell. Hundreds of outraged citizens called the National Historic Park in Philadelphia where the bell was housed to express their anger. Their nerves were only calmed when Taco Bell revealed, a few hours later, that it was all a practical joke. Incidentally, Taco Bell also reported as fact that sales increased by $500,000 on April 1st and $600,000 on April 2nd over the prior week’s same day sales. [*]In 1993 a German radio station announced that officials in Cologne had just passed an unusual new city regulation. Joggers going through the park would be required to pace themselves to go no faster than six mph. Any faster, it was felt, would unnecessarily disturb the squirrels who were in the middle of their mating season. [*]In 1965 BBC TV featured an interview with a professor who had just invented a device called "smellovision." This miraculous technology allowed viewers to experience directly in their own home aromas produced in the television studio. The professor offered a demonstration by cutting some onions and brewing coffee. A number of viewers called in to confirm that they distinctly experienced these scents as if they were there in the studio with him. Since no aromas were being transmitted, whatever these viewers thought they smelled coming out of their TV sets must be chalked up to the power of suggestion.[/list] And finally, one of my favorites: [list][*]In 1998 Burger King published a full page advertisement in USA Today announcing the introduction of a new item to their menu: a "Left-Handed Whopper" specially designed for the 32 million left-handed Americans. According to the advertisement, the new whopper included the same ingredients as the original Whopper (lettuce, tomato, hamburger patty, etc.), but all the condiments were rotated 180 degrees for the benefit of their left-handed customers. The following day Burger King issued a follow-up release revealing that although the Left-Handed Whopper was a hoax, thousands of customers had gone into restaurants to request the new sandwich. Simultaneously, according to the press release, "many others requested their own 'right handed' version."[/list] Be careful what you believe. Sometimes wishful thinking makes us susceptible to believing what is not likely to be true. With the pressure to be leaders in news, I suspect that much of what we hear as TV “news” ends up being untrue as well. Develop your thinking skills to discern. This is a wonderful word normally viewed as spiritual insight. It's defined in the Merriam-Webster dictionary as “the power to see what is not evident to the average mind.”[/align][/FONT][/QUOTE][/FONT]

[quote name='Aberinkula][SIZE="1"][COLOR="DarkSlateGray"]I'm just wondering why you waited until now to talk to me about how long my chapters were Allamorph. :p[/COLOR'][/SIZE][/quote] [FONT=Arial]Because, bucko, this is the first time since I've started watching you that your "chapters" have even broken the first page. And to rebut your remark about length, did I say once that chapters had to be so long or couldn't be longer than so many pages? No; I said that you're confusing [I]chapters[/I] with [I]scenes[/I], and [I]scenes[/I] with simple narrative time-skips. So let's compare real quick with the easiest reference I have on hand: Stephen King's [U]Duma Key[/U], which I am currently reading. [U]Duma Key[/U] has a total of twenty-two chapters, a series of interjected sketches called "How To Draw A Picture" (of which there are ten), and an afterthought, running a total of six-hundred and eleven pages. The chapters are of varying length, running anywhere from eighteen pages to over forty, and each one is broken up into about ten or twelve smaller sections, all labeled with lowercase Roman numerals. The "How To Draw A Pitcure" interjections start before chapter one, and interrupt at irregular instances between chapters; the longest of [I]these[/I] is three pages, and the shortest is the one after the final chapter, consisting of all of three lines of text. As for Eragon; sure, if you have eighty chapters of four pages each, you'll still end up with three hundred and twenty pages of story, but your story will also feel alternately like it's slogging waist-deep through the mud and flying at Mach Ten. Which is what Eragon felt like. It was a good idea for a story, but altogether too immature, and far too rushed and clichéd at some parts. Also, books with significantly short chapters are in my experience geared towards a younger audience with a shorter attention span. I mentioned in my previous post The Bobbsey Twins; that is the kind of book your story feels like in its current format. And with that in mind, the format and the content are in severe conflict, because younger readers are not ready for the purported "graphic violence, harsh language, and sexual themes" you claim to be writing. When I see that conflict, and when I see you say something like [I][SIZE="1"][COLOR="DarkSlateGray"]"I like small chapters because it allows me to not read only half of a chapter, which I hate doing.... I always like to finish a chapter, so a short one just helps me keep interest"[/COLOR][/SIZE][/I], it seems to me that the only audience you have in mind while you're writing this story is yourself. Adding to that deduction the fact that you are deliberately including mature content, [I]and[/I] given your age, the story begins to absolutely [I]scream[/I] self-gratuity to me. (And also knowing whose wing you decided to take shelter under for a very long time, the sense is even more pronounced.) So again, I know this is harsh, but as far as I understand, you only wrote this story as a means to pleasure yourself. "Wank off", if you'll excuse my lewdness. And now I wonder if you even have an interest in growing as a writer at all, or if this is just a means to preserve another fantasy you've had. Now then.[/oxymoron] [quote name='Aberinkula][SIZE="1"][COLOR="DarkSlateGray"][FONT=Book Antiqua]I'm not trying to 'break anyone's hearts' by telling them it might be my last story.[/FONT][/COLOR'][/SIZE][/quote] Obviously. As you said, you're trying to motivate yourself into actually finishing. But this logic is severely flawed. If I understand you correctly, you have told yourself that if you don't finish this one, it'll be your last. This is a dumb idea. When I was fourteen, I was still only writing unfinished sketches. In fact, it was just last year that I even decided to finally begin writing from the intended starting point of my "series", which still only exists in my head. (All three timelines, twenty-odd main characters, allamorphs, cyborgs, a Man in White, three disembodies spirits, two galaxies, and a partridge in a pear tree. Not quite sure how the partridge fits in canonically, though.) So while you may be getting aggravated that you can't seem to finish anything constructive, keep in mind that you're still really young, and still shouldn't be expected to crank out a masterpiece just yet. Also, by setting yourself up this way, you're basically guaranteeing that you'll quit. The first moment you get significantly hung up or stuck on a story bit, and you'll remember that "this might be your last", and you'll try to push harder, and you'll get stressed, and you'll get fed up with it, throw the whole endeavor in the wastebasket, and content yourself with defeat the rest of your life. Ye [I]gods[/I], if I'd got discouraged at the first signs of writer's block, I'd have quit when I was nine. My comment about [I]our[/I] perceptions was intended to show you what your statement actually says to the people who come into the thread. If you're bothering to mention that it might be your last, it's obvious that you feel that it is somewhat important that the audience knows this tidbit. Not only that, but usually the people who are making that statement are already successful, and are [I]retiring[/I]. You've barely started, and you also mentioned after [COLOR="DarkRed"]Sabrina[/COLOR] first called you out that it was a motivation for you, and thus not something any of us really needed to know. So yes, I know you said this "might" be your last. And I'm telling you that even saying [I]that[/I] much is downright stupid. (^_^) Don't set yourself up for failure. Trust me on that one.[/FONT]

[quote name='Matt']You guys should check the soundtrack out. It was released for free. [URL="http://www.petroglyphgames.com/forums/index.php?showtopic=7587&hl="][U]Here[/U][/URL] you go.[/QUOTE] [FONT=Arial][I]Gracías[/I], my friend. I am now very happy. For those who don't really want to follow the link without further information, it's the Universe At War: Earth Assault OST. Comes with three albums on the download, and it is what I'm listening to right now. ....though, I should probably be heading to jazz band now also. >_>[/FONT]

[FONT=Arial]Oh, for the love of..... [CENTER][IMG]http://icanhascheezburger.files.wordpress.com/2007/11/funny-pictures-cat-giving-finger.jpg[/IMG][/CENTER] Sheesh. :p[/FONT]

[FONT=Arial]Before I get into anything really intensive, I'd like to say two things. [QUOTE=Aberinkula][COLOR="DarkSlateGray"][SIZE="1"][FONT="Book Antiqua"]Welcome to the latest, and possibly the last story I'll write, 2572. // And as for why it might be my last story, I've just simply started to lose interst. In fact, I can't finish any story, so this being my last will make me want to finish it. It may sound foolish, but I think that it may help me in the future.[/FONT][/SIZE][/COLOR][/QUOTE] No. No, it won't. In fact, calling it "the last" is not only an even greater excuse to simply lay it aside, but doing so also forces you to lie to yourself, should you ever want to continue writing. And besides, telling [I]us[/I] that it's your last attempt does basically nothing. My life was not made radically different after seeing you had posted this, and it will not be radically different knowing that this may be your final composition. And at the end of the day, I'm not going to lose any sleep over whether or not you end your career as a writer, or even that you had a career at all. Harsh, I know, but you need to get used to knowing that even though some of us may comment on your work and try to help you out, it's probably not going to break our hearts that you decided to quit—which is what that statement comes across as. Second, I think you're confusing "chapter" with "scene". Actual chapters in decent length books run around thirty pages, at least, depending on the author. The amount of material you're providing for each of your "chapters" is more along the lines of a children's fiction novel, like the Bobbsey Twins, or the Boxcar Children, or sommat—and even then, there's probably about ten pages to [I]them[/I], too. If you've read Christopher Paolini's book [I][U]Eragon[/U][/I], you'll notice a similar style with his chapters. Some of them barely run two pages. This isn't because he's necessarily pioneering anything, but more, I think, because he's an immature writer, and made the same mistake regarding "chapter" and "scene". I remember once during Spanish class coming up with an idea to plug into my main universe, and by the time I got there, it was seventeen pages (front and back, college rule) later; and the scene carried for five [I]more[/I] pages before I felt comfortable making a chapter break. For instance, between chapters 1 and 2, you could instead have just made the break that indicated a time-skip, since that is perfectly allowable in the middle of a chapter. Also, the break you have right after the beginning of Chapter 2 would then not be necessary; it's just a continuation of the scene, and indicates that nothing really interesting happened between the time Higar left for school and arrived there. I'm not really sure what to offer as a suggestion for judging good chapter length; it's more of a feel you get from reading a lot of good fiction. If you immerse yourself in stuff by the guys who know what they're doing, you'll start feeling how to do it yourself. That's all I'll say for the moment. I'll come back later with in-depth stuff, since I see things that want my attention. :p[/FONT]