Mr. Maul

[quote name='ChibiHorseWoman][COLOR=#9933ff']By the way.... still don't exactly know who either of you really are, so don't expect a wedding gift. :animeblus[/COLOR][/quote] [SIZE=1][COLOR=DimGray] That minor detail didn't stop me. [/COLOR][/SIZE]

[center][IMG]http://www.supersaverzone.org/prodimages/5779-1.jpg[/IMG] [/center] [SIZE=1][COLOR=DimGray]I got you this toaster oven. The food's not included. [/COLOR][/SIZE]

[SIZE=1][COLOR=DimGray]Luckily, I was born with impeccable musical taste, so I've never had this problem. [/COLOR][/SIZE]

[center][IMG]http://bp1.blogger.com/_KXcyDEz5dhQ/R08XJs9i8fI/AAAAAAAAAEw/8Z8EfmYaQs4/s400/Bing+Crosby.jpg[/IMG] [SIZE=1][COLOR=DimGray]The official soundtrack of Christmas. [/COLOR][/SIZE][/center]

[SIZE=1][COLOR=DimGray]Harold Shipman is my dentist. He's a heck of a lot better than Orin Scrivello, my old dentist. [/COLOR][/SIZE]

[COLOR=DimGray][SIZE=1]It tastes even worse when they take them off. They use a grinder to sand off the bits of glue that are still left on your teeth, so there's glue dust going everywhere. It smells as terrible as it tastes. [/SIZE][/COLOR]

[quote name='Lunar][COLOR=DarkOrange']What are wax beans?:confused:[/COLOR][/quote] [FONT=Verdana][SIZE=1][COLOR=DimGray]It is your lucky day.[/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [FONT=Verdana][SIZE=1][COLOR=DimGray] I just won a time machine on eBay. I went back to the year 1998 and told Larry Page and Sergey Brin to start a company whose online service would assist people in their various queries. Now I've come back to the present time to relay this information to you. But please, let's keep it on the D/L. Just you and me, you know? That being said, the only thing I can think of that takes the disgusting cake is the glue that was used when I got braces. It was about five years ago and I can still taste it. [/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT]

[SIZE=1][COLOR=DimGray]I don't do any exercising at the moment, but I'm going to start doing a regiment I came up with sometime soon. It involves sets of push ups, sit ups, lunges, and running. No weights, because I don't have any, and I'm not trying to bulk up. [/COLOR][/SIZE]

[SIZE=1][COLOR=DimGray]Take two shots of vodka and mix it with another shot of vodka. [/COLOR][/SIZE]

[SIZE=1][COLOR=DimGray]I can suggest movies that you shouldn't waste your time seeing. [/COLOR][/SIZE]

[SIZE=1][COLOR=DimGray]I don't dance. I just two-step. [/COLOR][/SIZE]

[FONT=Verdana][SIZE=1][COLOR=DimGray]To all the US citizen board members eighteen years of age and older:[/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [center][IMG]http://c2.ac-images.myspacecdn.com/images02/13/l_0518f1d2128745b6b542bdcec7364599.png[/IMG] [/center] [FONT=Verdana][SIZE=1][COLOR=DimGray]Also, once you have done so, feel free to tell any horror/humorous/weird/normal stories that occurred when you voted. Hanging chads. [/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT]

[FONT=Verdana][SIZE=1][COLOR=DimGray]I would **** myself because I know no one else will. [/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT]

[FONT=Verdana][SIZE=1][COLOR=DimGray]My style of clothing is Awesome. [/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT]

[FONT=Verdana][SIZE=1][COLOR=DimGray]Today's my birthday. I had a McRib combo for breakfast, and I'm going to have key lime pie instead of boring ol' cake. I've got a stack of movies I'm going to watch, and I eagerly anticipate my presents. Tell me about your favorite birthday memories. [/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT]

[quote name='Eclipsed Dreamer][COLOR=Indigo']i've never seen him on snl, though. [/COLOR][/quote] [SIZE=1][COLOR=DimGray]That's because you're 14.[/COLOR][/SIZE] [quote name='Allamorph][FONT=Arial][B]Superbad[/B]. The name speaks for itself. Possibly the [I][B]only[/B][/I'] funny moment in the movie was McLovin, and even that only the first time. Every other second I spent watching this movie was also spent wondering who in the world wrote the script, and what debilitating brain disorder they had self-inflicted to be able to write it.[/FONT][/quote] [SIZE=1][COLOR=DimGray]It was written by Seth Rogen and Evan Goldberg when they were 15. The debilitating, yet non-self-inflicted brain disorder you referred to would be adolescence. Now, I won't argue with your right to dislike the movie, but, don't even think about disrespecting Mr. Rogen, because when you disrespect Mr. Rogen, you are disrespecting Judd Apatow, and when you disrespect Judd Apatow, you are disrespecting the best television series about high school ever made... Freaks and Geeks. And I won't stand for it. Oh, and as for Zombie Strippers, it's supposed to be bad. It's a parody of the grindhouse-esque genre. [/COLOR][/SIZE]

[URL="http://www.hasthelargehadroncolliderdestroyedtheworldyet.com/"]www.hasthelargehadroncolliderdestroyedtheworldyet.com[/URL]

[quote name='White][SIZE=1][COLOR=DimGray] Mr. Maul, I see what you were trying to do with the free style thing but I think there's a limit on how simple you should make a banner. At least put effort into it.[/COLOR'][/SIZE][/quote] [FONT=Verdana][SIZE=1][COLOR=DimGray]I seem to have forgotten that I had not put any effort into my signature. Thanks for reminding me. [/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT]

[SIZE=1][COLOR=DimGray]My current... [/COLOR][/SIZE]

[FONT=Verdana][SIZE=1][COLOR=DimGray]Umm... I'm not sure if I should be posting this here or even posting this at all, but, I just thought I would let everyone know that I have not fallen out of this RPG; I am merely waiting for the most opportune moment to introduce my character. So don't forget about me. [/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT]

[SIZE=1][COLOR=DimGray][B]Passenger/Crew Member Name[/B]: Jedidiah Aluitious Pennback [B]Age[/B]: 65 [B]Identification[/B]:[/COLOR][/SIZE] [IMG]http://i15.photobucket.com/albums/a376/mrmaul/JedidiahAluitiousPennbackID.png[/IMG] [SIZE=1][COLOR=DimGray][B]Occupation & Background[/B]: Maintenance - Chief Engineer. Quick-tempered, crusty, and harder than nails, Jedidiah Pennback ("The Chief", "Chief Pennback", or simply "Pennback" for short) is as salty a dog as they come. Always reeking of homemade moonshine and sweat, he is perpetually in some state of intoxication. Nevertheless, he remains the best in his field, even when completely sloshed. Rumored to have served in some branch of the military (Marines is the most common guess among the crew), Pennback always makes references to "The War," telling one story after another, each one's details contradicting the last's. Despite his extremely strict, drill instructor-like treatment of his crew, he is the grand poobah of slobbiness. He has a complete disregard for personal hygiene, and his quarters is in a state utter disarray. An engineering MacGuyver, Pennback has the gift of being able to essentially build anything out of anything, so long as he has the right tools (which he does... he and his tool belt never part company; he even sleeps with it on). If it's broken, he can fix it. If it's not broken, he can make it better. [/COLOR][/SIZE]

[FONT=Verdana][SIZE=1][COLOR=DimGray]Caffeine is a terrible drug. [/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT]

[SIZE=1][COLOR=DimGray]I don't ever sleep. [B]Ever[/B]. I also don't ever end my thread titles with prepositions. [B]Ever[/B]. [/COLOR][/SIZE]

[FONT=Verdana][SIZE=1][COLOR=DimGray]Same beat. Start at the very beginning for full effect. Here I come right off the drop/ Grippin' the grain as I raise the top/ Poppin' the trunk in the parking lot, you can/ Always catch me at the spot/ Smoke pourin' outta my Cadillac, fo'/ Fifteens bangin' in the back, sip-/ Sippin' my drank while I count my stack, man/ Carry seven grams and a platinum gat/ Screwed Up Click makin'-makin' my tracks, Rollin'-/ Rollin' on Dubs, leadin'-leadin' my pack/ Slow, loud, and bangin', just like Paul Wall spat, Cuz I'm/ Headin' up the game, knockin'-knockin' haters flat/ Comin' from the South, always doin' my thang, Screw/ Tape still on and y'all's watchin' me swang, while I'm/ Ridin' through the hood, callin'-callin' my gang, gonna-/ Gonna turn that sucka [B]Zen[/B] into a stain/ *Tires Squeal* Hahaha!/ [/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT]

[SIZE=1][COLOR=DimGray]Eels.[/COLOR][/SIZE] [URL="http://elbo.ws/tracks/eels/"][SIZE=1][COLOR=DimGray]Click. [/COLOR][/SIZE][/URL]