Jesus Chicken

[color=blue]I watched the brown leaves fall to the dark forest floor. Steadily I made my way through the trees, shuffling leaves beneath my feet. I looked up into the canopy of the area, and stared into the spindly tree tops, all bare except for a few orange leaves here and there, and when a strong breeze comes, down they will come. I watched a few birds chase one another through the the trees, one flew close to me, I reached for my sword slowly, and the cleft the creature in two. Blood spilt over the ground and the other birds flew off, screaching. That was the sound I wanted to stop...Typical, I thought to myself, as I wandered on from the forest leaving behind me the only place I had ever known, things always go the opposite to how I want them to. Oh well, now is my chance to try and change all that...[/color]

[color=blue]Powderfinger, probably the biggest band after Silverchair in OZ, just released a new album, Vulture Steet. I purchased the album the day it came out, and it's damn GOOD! It's heaps rockier then their older stuff, and just as cool. SO if anyone here owns the album, I would just like to hear your opinion of it. If not, go buy it, now![/color]

[color=blue]The radio station is KBBL...In the same episode, what does Homer raise Bart's allowance to, so they can pay the bills?[/color]

[color=blue]You're damn right! Ok...ignore the Uh-Oh thing, but here's yo picture[/color]

[color=blue]The lyrics are as follows: [I]I wanna go to Mt Splashmore, take me, take me, take me, take me now! NOW! NOW! NOW! NOW! NOW! Mt.Splashmore take me there, right now[/I] Hmmm.... When Homer gets a helper monkey, whats it's name, and what is it involved in that causes injury to the monkey in question???[/color]

[color=blue]I'm sorry to admit that I have seen this movie. I saw it a couple of hours ago now, and it's one of the crappiest movies I've ever seen. I think all the people involved in that movie, were just doing it for money. The Plot was unclear and vague, and the scripped had so many holes it could have been typed on Swiss Cheese. Terrible[/color]

[color=blue]Ohhh, GOD!, Why? Jesus, these are offcially the lamest jokes in the world. I would just like to know, if anyone here likes Baby Jokes? Because if you do, I shall post them, but I probably need a guarantee that no one will get me arrested first.[/color]

[color=blue] Cloricus...Be Quiet. You're just living proof that post counts are no indicator of quality of post-matter. You love being a geek, but how about a tool? hehehe, yeah. C'mon Flynn, you have enough other people here to not accept Cloricus' post and kick this thing off.[/color]

[color=blue]And then...Mittens the kitten, got possessed...[/color]

[color=blue]Bleh! I am happy being a Member. I don't really post well enough to be a Mod, and I would be a terrible one anyway. All I would do would be to get Members I didn't like banned, and close threads I didn't agree with...not that any of our [I]current[/I] Mods would do that? *Cough!*Harlequin*Cough![/color]

[color=blue]So this is just an open thread to anyone who wants to be in it, right? If so, I'm going to post in this crazy thread as an actualt start of the so called "story" yeah. So fill us in, and we should kick it off.[/color]

[color=blue] Olga! Go the "Gods Must be crazy" Movies! For the squirrel: [I]"See, this just goes to show that Diabeties, is a very serious problem, and it's now getting to the animals. A small sip of a sugary drink, like Coke, or a jellybaby, might be all a Squirrel needs to survive. So if you see a Squirrel with diabetes, don't kick it, give it a hit...of sugar.[/I] It doesn't have to make sense...[/color]

[color=blue]Send some Pm's to people you think would suit then, you crazy fool. Thats right, Raven's getting jealous over someone whom Harlequin won't meet. Ever. And if you have met each other, it's mearly a formality.[/color]

[color=blue]We began walking along the street when an idea came to me. [I]"I think the best idea would be to follow that crazy deamon thing that attacked us. Hey Qyrain, maybe he's your father?"[/I] Both Dragalla and Qyrain just stared at me. [I]"No, seriously, I think we should follow that thing, he went east right? He jumped off that building, didn't he?"[/I] Dragalla:[I] But I still need a weapon of some description. "True, Hey, go into that alley, there should be two fallen deamons, I'm pretty sure one of them had a sword or something."[/I] I said, pointing into the alleyway where I had killed the two beasts. Dragalla ran off into the darkness. My gaze followed her, well her lower-half anyway. [I]"Hmm, I'm glad she chose pants that were a size smaller then what she should probably wearing."[/I] Qyrain: [I]For once, I agree with you Indrid. "You think she has a fine *** too?"[/I] Qyrain simply rolled his eyes, then went on to explain further. Qyrain: [I]The beast that attacked us.He did say he was leading the attack, if I remember correctly. "Ahh, of course, yeah, I think you're right.[/I] Dragalla walked out of the darkness, wielding a short sword, stained with human blood. Dragalla: [I]So are we giving chase to that fiend? "I believe we are"[/I] I replied, winking.[/color]

[color=blue]They have awards for people doing really stupid things don't they? If they do, someone should give one to that cop. I don't think there is anything wrong with toy guns, having spent a large amount of my childhood, around at The Harlequin's, playing with toy guns, and pretending to kill things, and each other. WE TURNED OUT FINE!! Yeah, the woman shouldn;t be trying to ban toy guns, she should be trying to put restrictions on the IQ of police officers. What a dumbass.[/color]

[color=blue][I]"So no one has any ideas?"[/I] They both shook their heads. [I]"Nice."[/I] We all stood around silently, thinking of what to do next, when our "quiet time" was interrupted by a creature walking out of an alleyway, around the corner and then stopping at the front of the store where we stood. I stared at it for a moment, seeing a large sword in it's grip, taterred wings, and cold stare. Then I responded accordingly. [I]"WHAT THE **** IS THAT??!!"[/I] ???: [I]Hello there. My name is Ryan, I am a Fallen Angel. It is I who lead this attack on your pitiful excuse for a planet.[/I] [I]"Of course, you're the bad guy!. I am Indrid, this is Qyrain and that lovely little lady there is Dr-..."[/I] Ryan: [I]Dragalla, yes I know her. Stupid woman.[/I] Qyrain: [I]I don't think that's very necessary. It was Indrid that dressed her.[/I] [I]"I confess to that. So what do you want anyway?"[/I][/color]

[color=blue]BAH! It is but a small detail. I'm a mage fighter anyway. I thought that should have been made pretty clear by my Bio stuff. Oh well. Now you know.[/color]

[color=blue]We ran and walked warily around the block, and found a clothing store that had obviously been the scene of a recent attack. Three men lay ripped apart and nearby a single deamon lay decapitated. [I]"You friends do nice work."[/I]I said, eying the fallen. [I]"You should be able to find something in here to your liking. Plenty of black."[/I] I watched Dragalla walk over to a clothing rack, crimson hair falling to her knees. [I]"I can trim your hair back a little bit if you want too."[/I]I said. Dragalla simply turned and shook her head. Dragalla:[I]Excuse me for a moment.[/I] She removed a pair of black vinyl pants and a dark red short sleeved cotton top from the clothing rack and the walked behind an open door. "[I]I don't know why she did that, it's not like we haven't seen her naked so far anyway. Just goes to show that deamon women are just as silly as the rest of the human ones."[/I] Qyrain simply just raised an eyebrow and looked at me. "[I]I wish you would stop doing that."[/I] Qyrain:[I]If you give me no reason to "do it" as you put it, I shan't have any need to.[/I] [I]"Bah!"[/I] At that point, Dragalla came back from around the door, now fully clothed. Dragalla:[I]Do you think this should be suitable?[/I] She asked us, turning a little bit. I watched her spin, and noticed her tight pants. Leaning closer to Qyrain, I covered my mouth and whispered in his ear: [I]"Yummm, ***."[/I] Qyrain simply turned, and raised his eyebrow once again, but this time, he had a smirk on his face. [I]"That's better"[/I] I said to him, [I]"Yeah that looks fine to me. So what this god-forsaken-rock are we going to do now?[/I][/color]

[color=blue]Just following on from Manic's comment from the previous page about having different titles for OB memebers who have made 1000+ posts. Perhaps there could be a few different titles to choose from, for those people who want be a bit different. I'm not exactly sure what they could be, but I'm sure it would be a pleasant change from everyone being exactly the same. Perhaps you could have titles that have something to do with member's interests. Something like "Manga Maniac" for a person who is an avid Manga fan. I dunno. I'm just throwing ideas around here, but yeah.[/color]

[color=blue]I'd have to disagree with you Lost Prophet. Flea fits in like no one else would in the RHCP. Could you think of anyone esle cool or funky enough? I would be veyr suprised.[/color]

[color=blue]Name: Kristopher "Kris "Cornell Race: Human. It's not creative, I know, but you can get bent. "Class": Kris is a half human - half Vahtni Bio: Kristohper was born of two surface dwellers. His mother "Kendra" was a Vahtni, who was raped by Kris' father(obviously) when a group of human's rushed her in the forest, beat her, and had their way with her unconscious form. Kris was raised by his mother among a large population of Vahtni. By the age of seven, Kris was the strongest adolescant in the village, being half human. He tought himself to fight with a sword that was given to him by his mother, who said that it was left behind by the group that had attacked her and belonged to his father. Since Kristopher recieved this sword, he has longed to plunge it into his father's chest, and let it rest there. For many years he remained under the care her mother, and the other Vahtni present in the village. Kris tought himself to ride, and fire a bow, with great skill. When he reached the age of tweleve, Kris began his part as an apprentice spellwielder. For the following eight years, Kristopher's life was nothing more then meditation, mock combat and studying prayers. One sunny morning in the month of Rain, Kris was awoken by the sound of screaming accompanied by the smell of smoke. He reached for his sword, which was glowing from an incantation Kris hat uttered the night before, and opened the door of his hut. To his dismay his village was being attacked by a group of humans. The Vahtni were winning the battle, using their prowess in magic to dispatch the human marauders, but a few Vahtni had fallen in the battle. As the humans retreated, Kris sreached the slain for the only person that mattered to him, and found her. He discovered her charred corpse under the remains of a hut that had been torched by the humans. The only give-away for her identity was the end of a pendant she wore around her neck. He was soon informed that he must leave this village, as once any member of the Vahtni communtiy is orphaned, they are outcast until they reach the age of sixty. Kris knew full well there was no reason to argue, and was more then willing to leave as he wanted to leave behind the memories of his mother, now dead. Kristopher has now set out into the world, in an attempt to track down his father, and deal out a just punishment. Description: With a name like mine who else could it possibly be... See Attachment. Other: Kris carries with him a sack of gold coins, and his enchanted sword. He wears black leather armour, with a shirt underneath. (see attachment) He also wears the pendant he found on the remains of his mother. (see attachment}. He also likes to eat roast chicken...Hehehe there you go Flynn, some dietry stuff too.[/color]

Damn, thats alot of hair I thought to myself. Hmm, oh well, what's she going to do, and if it's a trap, it doesn't matter, we were going to die anyway, and if she killed us, at least it would all be over soon. I looked over at Qyrain. Hell I didn' know if he would turn on me either, but it was a risk I was willing to take. I looked back the mass of hair, flesh and blood that lay before me. ???: Oh thankyou Indrid, thankyou Qyrain. "But I haven't said anything yet, niether has..." ???: You forget, I can read your minds remember? "Oh yeah, this will save precious time reserved for communication. " Qyrain: So what is yo-... ???: My name is Dragalla. "This is going to get annoying if you keep interrupting us, so perhaps you should let us finish saying what we were going to say , even if you know whats co-..." Dragalla: Coming next? Ok, I'll see what I can do. "Nice"I thought to myself, just what we need another smart *** in my group. Dragall glared at me and then replied. Dragalla:I'm still bleeding, since it is your group I'm a part of, you should probably help me. "Hmm, Ok, but don' be reading my mind between 11 and 12 o'clock at night, that's Indrid's time!"

[color=blue]I blew a deep breath out as I studied the creature that lay on the ground before me. It's lucky that the sound of gunfire and screaming didn't draw the attention of any other deamons. I leaned against the wall, slowly sliding down it. Breathing loudly, I tried to decide what to do. It seems that there are other people out there who are trying to fight these things, and I am too, so why not help them. It's as simple as that, and I have nothing better to do. I stood up, and walked back up the alley, when another deamon walked past. It seemed to be just sweeping the area, searching for any humans that had been left behind. It's eyes of pitch looked down my alley, and obviously saw me, and the fallen deamon behind me. It screamed loudly, and broke into a run. I raised my 9mm's and opened fire. Damn this things were quick. Bullets spread unholy fluid behind the beast, but its speed kept it coming, and the thing plowed into me. I moaned in pain and looked down at my white clothes that were now stained with deamon's blood. Hmm, thats a sentance I never thought I would think would happen. I rolled it off me, and rose to my feet. Cold, and drenched with blood of a creature that had just risen from the depths of hell, I walked out of the alleyway, leaving two deamons behind.[/color]

[color=blue] WHAT THE **** IS GOING ON?! I screamed in my mind. I then realised how right I was in choosing not to vocalise anything as three beasts flew past. And people say the bronx is bad, Je-SUS! I saw one them lift up a person, and throw him through a wall. Here I was, tucked up against a wall holding two uzis, and there was something that had just thrown a guy through a wall. Well there eyes weren't shielded, and their face and stomach didn't look that hard. There must be a way to kill these things, and I'm sure going to find out if guns can do something. [I]Click! Click! Click![/I] I heard sounds of taloned feet approaching over the screams of human horror, and snarls of deamon delight. Well it seemed as though now seemed as good a time as any to find out if my weapons of choice can deal with the things. I picked up a rock just to my left, and hurled it further down the alley I was currently occupying. [I]SMASH![/I] The sound of breaking glass greeted my ears, and that of the deamon no more then 10 feet away. Something sped past me, as I swept around to see the back of the deamon, staring up at the wall. The beast turned and saw the barrels of my guns. The beast then saw the barrels of my guns flash. The beast then could see no more. It howled in pain as the bullets tore through it's eyes, and embedded themselves in his brain. The howling quickly stopped. I walked closer to it slowly, and emptied a full clip from the metal object in my left hand into its head. Can't be too careful, I thought to myself. Oh well, at these things die like everthing else.[/color]

[color=blue]Yeah, there's no real need for it anyway. Because when you think about it, when someone sees something they really don't disagree with, like a post, they are generally mature enough to send a PM to a mod, or maybe the member who posted whatever it is that is causing the other person to be offended. For example, when I was a newb on these crazy boards, I had a banner that featured a cartoon I had drawn. Sara Tuscumbere (I think thats right) didn't like it very much, and so PM'ed me. I took it on board and changed my banner. So yeah. When people have a problem with something, normally they will let someone know about it. I see no need to introduce a different system for doing something we can already do just fine.[/color]