Lady Asphyxia

[font=arial narrow]Oh god, what I would give for Vegemite and real butter on toast right now. I love the way you continually do something to change and to impress us. If all you did was write the same sort of poems, then it all would hae gotten old fast. But the way you change it; the cats poem which was indescribably yummy, and now this toast poem with no connotations at all [but with extra zest! ^.~] it all makes it very interesting to keep reading your poems. For some reason, the poem reminds me of something like Dr Seuss. I think it has to be the exclaimation marks. Have you written anything in Dr Seuss style? If so, where is it? If not, I challenge you to! ^_^[/font]

[font=arial narrow][size=2]I have three words for you: [b]Short. Attention. Span.[/b] It can most probably be considered the bane of my life. Generally I'm in the middle of many books at once: my most was probably 7-8 at once. I find this happens particularly when I'm rereading books, because I get bored with them, mark the page, and move to the next book. My biggest problem with reading multiple books is that I get confused which events happen in which books. So I'll go back to a book and think, [i]This doesn't make sense! They were just at the carnival, not a forest![/i] and lose the plot...which in turn makes me lose interest and pick up another book, haha. I can see that reading multiple books can msot definitely be tiresome/troublesome, but at the same time I get bored very easily. I'm quite a demanding reader, I suppose. The second desription seems to lag, I either put down the book and skip until I hit some dialogue. A bad habit. ^_^"[/font][/size]

[size=2] Contact [PG -- VSL] Short story The bustling crowd of people jostled its way through the markets, the summer heat making people cranky and rude. She pushed her way through the square, elbowing those stupid enough to take her on. Her flight had been delayed; she'd spent fourteen hours at an airport with eighty other passengers, all of them grumpy about the delay. And now she had to fight her way through this tide of people in the markets. With a snarl, she viciously elbowed a brunette who'd shoved Terri out of her way. The brunette, a snooty business-type, by the looks of it, just sent her a look of disdain and continued on. Terri pushed her own straggly blonde hair out of the way and continued, spotting a likely place to get a cup of coffee. God, how she needed a coffee. With a sigh, Terri went to pull out her wallet as she waited in line at the coffee place. It was gone, of course. Just what she needed. With a sigh, Terri moved out of the line, apologising to the man behind her. What is Contact? Contact explores the ideas that you will have some sort of effect on every person you meet, and that every person has a story. Contact is an RPG in the sense that each player plays his or her own character. Unlike a normal RPG, where each group collaborates in telling the story, each post is a story in and of itself. The post before yours relates to, but does not really impact on, your post. Your characters do not interact or bond in any real way. Six Degrees of Seperation is the theory that anyone on the planet can be connected to any other person on the planet through a chain of acquaintances that has no more than five intermediaries. Contact uses this theory. As an example, the first post is a story focusing on Terri. The second post is from the perspective of someone Terry came into contact with. For instance, the second post could follow the story of the brunette Terri had the altercation with, the man she apologised to, or even the pickpocket. In each Chapter, there will be six posts. There are three 'rules' in Contact; each post must mention/somehow have contact with the post before them, each post must have contact with a person other than the previous post, and the last post in each chapter must somehow have contact with the character from the first post. In each chapter, the first poster will be given a setting to work with. While the first poster is chosen, the remainer posters are free to post whenever they choose, as long as it relates to the post directly before theirs. Requirements Because of the nature of this RPG, you need to be flexible. Other players will be representing your characters. In some respects, there'll be less of your characters appearing, but in other ways, your characters will be free reign to anyone involved in the RPG. While you must work within limits of the described character -- i.e. if you choose to play the brunette, she must remain both snooty and businesslike -- because it is your story, you must also have the ability to expand on a character without being paranoid about playing someone else's character. Please keep everything to a PG level. If you must exceed that level, label the beginning of the post. Sign up Because of the unusual nature of the RPG, I require a sample story of no more than 400 words. Any sign ups more than 400 words will be automatically disregarded. Your name: Sample story: Preferably, I would also like a link to a story you've written/RPG you've participated in on OB. This is, however, optional. It is not required in order to make it into the RPG. [/size]

[font=Arial Narrow][size=2]OB Anthology requires all creative threads to be rated. Any thread not rated is to be closed. However, even if this thread was rated, I would still close it. While your spelling and punctuation is acceptable, I really must ask you to put more effort into your posting. This story seems to have been written with very little effort and almost no narration or description. In future, try to flesh out your stories. I have no objection to stories about duels in OB Anthology, but I would like you to put more effort into them next time you put a story up. Thread Closed. [/size][/font]

[font=Arial Narrow][size=2]It was never removed. It was closed, yes, but not removed. If you go into advanced search, then enter your user name and choose "OB Anthology" from the list, it comes up with all the threads you've posted in within OB Anthology. Or, if you like, you can just go[color=SeaGreen][url="http://otakuboards.com/showthread.php?t=45625"] here[/url][/color]. [/size][/font]

[quote name='Shinmaru'] I'm pretty bad with pronouns, and I'm always at a loss as to how to refer to characters without getting really repetitive. I think that's really tough, honestly lol.[/quote] [font=Arial Narrow][size=2] Oh, god. Tell me about it. Sometimes I try to substitute "she" for something like "the blonde" or something. I don't do it very often, but it generally isn't to bad. Imagine my surprise when, after sending a story to a new beta [like an editor] to crit, she says that using phrases like "the blonde" make it too long! ...I never sent anything else to her, lol. >.> I liked the story. I don't know what Mitch was talking about, don't listen to him, lol. I thought the description was great and the total downtroddenness was just fantastic. I did work experience at a library and I know exactly what Miss M. feels like. I was shelving for hours. I actually gave myself a concussion at one point. I think the only thing I have difficulty with is that I want something to happen. I'm a person in one of those camps, you know?: [i]A story is interesting when an ordinary person does something out of the ordinary[/i]. I want M. to...to put up with helping her husband and for her to get sick while he isn't and not have any help and then eventually just snap and do...something. And the ending just [b]lends[/b] itself to that sort of thing. So, yes. I'd love for you to go further with this, but as it stands, it's good. ^_^ [/size][/font]

[quote name='MistressRoxie][color=#9933ff][size=1]Just another note to point out, a lot of nations in Europe (like England, France, Spain), Japan, and I don't know about Australia, but I'll assume (someone can always correct me) actually have working mass transit systems. You can take a train or a bus from a bus or train stop, and actually go somewhere!!! I'm still trying to grasp the concept, and am wondering if it works as well as I think it does, since I'm unfamiliar with mass transit that works.[/size'][/color][/quote] [font=Arial Narrow][size=2]Mmm...not so much in Australia. Australia is a very big place [just smaller than the contiguous 48 States of the US] and so we drive several hours to get anywhere. While we might drive an hour and a half to go to our Capital city and see maybe 4 towns in between, in England you drive for an hour and a half and see a town every fifteen minutes. Public transport is available in towns, but I don't know very many people who use it. We do have mass transit systems in the 'cities' [Which aren't as large as yours, I don't believe] and they work very well. I can catch a bus up from my town to the city [an hour and a half trip], catch a train from there to Central, then another train or bus [or even City Cat, which is a boat] to wherever I want to go. Most of the time I stay with friends in the city, so it takes me about two minutes to get there. Obviously bus rides take longer, but they're quite comfortable. The European system, while I've never actually been on it myself, seems to be very good. If you get a 3 month Eurorail pass you can pretty much go where you want to, I believe...as long as you have visas. ^_^" My brother's been on the London underground, and he said that it smells very bad, haha. [/size][/font][quote name='x kakashi x']well, childish much?[/quote] [font=Arial Narrow][size=2] This from a guy who says [i]childish much[/i]? [img]http://otakuboards.com/images/smilies/tongue.gif[/img] I can understand your point of view; but at the same time I think it's also important to take in the situation for the rest of the world, too. In Australia, I think that's pretty on par. Let me see...2.30 is about 4 dollars fifty cents, and we're paying about a dollar per litre at the moment [according to my Mum, I just asked her, lol.] 1 gallon is approx. 4.5 litres, so Australian and American fuel prices are pretty much on par at present. We actually had a fuel stunt here not long ago. A few years ago, ethanol based fuel got a bad rap because some petrol stations had fuel with 20% ethanol, which pretty much destroys you're engine. 10% ethanol is okay, however, and that's the amount it's supposed to have if you buy ethanol based fuel. This company, in order to raise good publicity for ethanol based fuel, put the price up as 9c per litre, between the hours of 7 am and 9am on this one day. So that, instead of paying about $40 for 40 litres, people paid about $3.60 for the same amount. The demand for this promotion was so great that they had to extend it for hours! Amazing, non? I don't really know very much about the situation with Saudi Arabia. I did try to do some research on it and found a website detailing examples where America apparently turned a blind eye or bent to Saudi Arabi's will -- the inference was because of fuel related issues, of course. [/size][/font]

[font=Arial Narrow][size=2]Oh, boo frickety hoo. You guys are so spoilt, it's ridiculous. We're paying 89 cents per [color=Red]litre[color=Black] in Queensland, and I'm pretty sure that New South Wales is generally about 10 cents more expensive. England is paying 79-85 pence per litre, and has been as high as 99 pence per litre. 1 gallon=4.546 litres, and 1 quid equals about 1.87 US dollars. Using those rates, fuel prices are something close to the following: 1 gallon in England= .79x1.87x4.[/color][/color]546 = [color=Red]6.72[/color] [color=Red]US dollars[/color]. 1 gallon in English currency= .79x4.546 = 3.59 pence. I think that says quite a bit, don't you? And quite frankly, I don't think boycotting Saudi based fuel will lower American fuel prices. It [color=Magenta]may[color=Black] lower other countries' prices; if the cheap fuel isn't going to America, then it's free to go to the other countries, in theory. I'm not exactly a professor regarding fuel, but I don't see how boycotting it will bring it down, lol. I think when it comes down to it, this'll be a matter of principle versus practicality. [/color][/color][/size][/font]

[font=Arial Narrow][size=2]There are several reasons that I'm closing this thread. The first is that OB Anthology requires all threads to be rated according to maturity. To learn more about ratings, please see [url="http://otakuboards.com/showthread.php?t=44313"][color=SeaGreen]this thread[/color]. [/url] However, I would have closed this thread even if it did have a rating. Your post quality is not satisfactory. "Netspeak" -- [/size][/font][font=Arial Narrow][size=2][color=Red]u instead of you, etc --[color=Black] is not acceptable at OtakuBoards, and correct punctuation and grammar [I.e. Capitalisation of the beginning of sentences, apostrophes of contractions] is a must,[color=DarkOrchid] especially [/color]in OB Anthology. In future, please clean up your post quality. I would recommend that you look at Otakuboard's [color=Orange][url="http://otakuboards.com/rules.php?#spam"]rules[/url][/color]. It wouldn't hurt to look at the [color=Orange][url="http://otakuboards.com/faq.php?"]FAQ[/url][/color], either. Thread Closed. [/color][/color][/size][/font]

[font=Arial Narrow][size=2]Just a reminder that these quotes are from stories/fanfics etc. that have been [color=DarkRed][i]written[/i][/color], not a part of your everyday conversation. If we just wanted quotatations you and your friends came up with, this thread would belong in OL. ^.~ Also, I suggest that you also state [color=Orange][i]why[/i][/color][/size][/font][font=Arial Narrow][size=2] you like your quote, rather than just quoting it.[/size][/font]

[quote name='MistressRoxie][color=#9933ff][/color][color=#9933ff']I personally think of Pope John Paul II as a great man. I do not agree with many of his pro-life choices (I'm pretty liberal), but I respect his consistency and his perseverance, and setting an example for the church in his descisions.[/quote] [font=Arial Narrow][size=2] [color=black]The Pope was a great man, no doubt about it. I think perhaps one of his strongest points was that he was able to bring both the conservative and the unorthadox factions of Catholicism closer together. His strict moral beliefs allowed the Conservatives to continue following him when a 'new-age' Pope would have alientated them, but his 'new-thinking' [I.e. the gathering mass with religious leaders from all over the word to pray for peace] also brought harmony within the world and encouraged a more liberal view of the Vatican for those who believed that Catholicism was too strict and prejudiced. He was a brilliant and kind man, and I think we and the rest of the world will find the loss even greater if the new Pope is not as diplomatic or charismatic as Pope John Paul II. I am a Catholic by baptism and confirmation, but I'm not very religious and I rarely, if ever, attend church etc. I will be praying on my Rosary Beads tonight, however. Mmm. Hating to sound mushy, but we've lost a great man. [/color][/size][/font][/color]

[font=Arial Narrow][size=2]Yamisui, please do not double post unless you absolutely have to. Your first post was not long enough to justify double posting. In future, please check the character limit before you double post.[/size][/font]

[font=Arial Narrow][size=2]Please do not double post, Malkav. If you need to add to the original post, simply edit it. ^.~ I've put this message as a post rather than inside your post, so that if you want to add another chapter, you may do so without double posting.[/size][/font]

[font=Arial Narrow][size=2]Mmm. Dagger, I agree with you completely. Commas can get confusing quickly, especially in a long sentence. Dashes are very easily recognised as a pause, I think, because the sentence actually stops -- there's a break in the writing, wheras a comma can be missed. Has anyone here ever deliberately experimented with punctuation to see how it affects their style of writing? I've written stories where I leave out the quotation marks in dialogue, and I've found that it forces my style of writing to be quite subdued and very flowing...as well as improving my descriptions. If I ever post it anywhere, I'll add the quotation marks simply because it would become cumbersome for the reader to read. [Alas, I'm the kind of person who will skip description and just read the dialogue -- if there are no quotation marks, I'll put the damn book down, lol.] Anyone else do something like this?[/size][/font]

[size=2][font=Arial Narrow]What is your view on punctuation in writing? Recently, both my beta readers [basically an editor] have gone through my work, and 'corrected' all my contractions; they marked [color=red]he'd[/color][color=black] as being [/color][color=red]he would[/color][color=black] and [color=red]shouldn't[/color] as being [color=red]should not[/color]. [/color][color=black]I understand that there is a place for this more formal use of words, particularly in business letters, but in my mind, my style of writing is quite informal, and the use of 'was not' in a first person monologue such as [i][color=seagreen]Pity it wasn?t me[/color][/i] seems to break the flow of the sentence. [/color][/font][/size] [font=Arial Narrow][size=2][color=black][font=Verdana][/font][/color][/size][/font] [color=black][font=Verdana][font=Arial Narrow][size=2]Of course, this is just one example. When you write, are there any punctuation quirks that you have, or quirks that annoy you? How are you taught to use punctuation in your country? Have you ever experimented with punctuation when writing; left out quotation marks for dialogue, capitalised every noun, ended each sentence with a capital?[/size][/font] [/font][/color]

[font=Verdana][size=1]You should also have rated your thread. All threads in OB Anthology must be rated as of December last year. To learn more about these ratings, see [/size][/font][url="http://otakuboards.com/showthread.php?t=44313"][font=Verdana][size=1]this [/size][/font][/url][font=Verdana][size=1]thread. [/size][/font] [font=Verdana][size=1][/size][/font] [font=Verdana][size=1]You may recreate this thread with the appropriate rating.[/size][/font] [font=Verdana][size=1][/size][/font] [font=Verdana][size=1]Thread Closed.[/size][/font]

[font=Verdana][size=1]Regarding ratings: I know that I, for one, will always check inside a thread to see if it's rated in the subheadings before actually closing a thread. If you forget to rate your thread, go 'edit' and change it; it won't show on the main forum page, however, it will show inside the thread [In the post title; see where [b]Ratings[/b] is in my post?]. If I see that a thread has been rated on the subtitle, then I'll simply change the main title to reflect that rating. After all, it shows me that the member/person [i]is[/i] following the rules, if a little belatedly.[/size][/font] [font=Verdana][size=1][/size][/font] [font=Verdana][size=1]The bottom line is that we all make mistakes, and generally, as mods, we're willing to understand that. If you accidentally create a double thread, just PM the forum/team mod. We're only too happy to help, and we certainly don't bite. ^_^[/size][/font]

[font=Verdana][size=1]Despite the fact that I do really like and encourage one-shots [my best work has often been from one-shots] OB Anthology requires all threads to be rated. Check out [/size][/font][url="http://otakuboards.com/showthread.php?t=44313"][font=Verdana][size=1]OB Anthology Basics[/size][/font][/url][font=Verdana][size=1] to learn more about it, and feel free to-recreate the thread with the appropriate rating.[/size][/font] [font=Verdana][size=1][/size][/font] [font=Verdana][size=1]Thread Closed.[/size][/font]

Whoo. Research essays, I can do. Generally. [quote name='Mitch']E.E. Cummings was a poet, painter, and man. His use of style and technique has been ridiculed, as well as praised, by critics. [/quote] I think perhaps [i]His use of style has been both ridiculed and praised by critics [/i]would be a better phrase. As it is, the sentence sounds a bit long when it can easily be made less complex. [quote]Cummings was always about the individual. He began with a traditional poetic style, as of that of Keats and others.[/quote] What others? When you just say Keats and others, it almost sounds as if you don't know of any other. Perhaps instead you can say [i]He began with a traditional poetic style, much like those used by Keats, Byron, Shelley, and other writers of the time.[/i] [quote] From there, he began using his emerging style. At first this new style was very compressed, even foreign, but in his later poems it is refined and near wholeness. To further understand Cummings' poetry, a deep analysis of his various uses of language and typography will enrich understanding and let one see the beauty of his poems. [/quote] You useds the stem understand twice in close proximity. Just watch that. ^.~ [quote]Cummings used language in many ways. One was by juxtaposition. By juxtaposing two terms together, he was able to form a new word. Although mainly lingustic, it is also typographical: words such as greentwittering have a certain aesthetic quality to them that makes them interesting to eye (Maurer). Most often, though, juxtaposition is used to speed up the tempo. An example of this is in the well-known poem, "in Just-": [color=red][Just an interesting side note; William Golding does the same thing with Samneric in Lord of the Flies. Cool, non?][/color] [size=1]and eddieandbill come running from marbles and piracies and it's spring[/size] Another way it is used is to produce telescoped (two or more images uniquely compressed together to make them seem as one) imagery: [size=1](past now float he--shes chiselled from darkness, slicesofnight with greyrockfaces-also)once, a spoolhat priest with a bellhat(all got up fit to, why it's. . .with redder than orange than redorange petticoats)bride[/size] "Slicesofnight," "greyrockfaces," "spoolhat," "bellhat," and "redorange" all juxtapose two words together and make interesting, telescoped imagery. Also, by juxtaposition, Cummings may create a new concept by two unlike descriptives, such as timeshaped or flowerterrible (Maurer). Other times, he telescopes two images together so tightly as to create a portmanteau (a word made by combining two words together - brunch is a good example) word, such as unknowndulous, a combination of undulous and unknown (Baum). Metonymy is perhaps one of the most interesting devices [color=red]C[/color]ummings uses. Metonymy is a figure of speech. It substitutes a different word for another, such as "wheels" to refer to a car, or "Washington" to refer to the United States Government. But Cummings doesn't use metonymy in quite the same way. Cummings' early books are full of favorite words. Thrilling, flowers, utter, skillful, groping, crisp, keen, actual, stars. These early words are often used as metonymies. Flower and other words are metaphorical shorthand for concepts Cummings finds worthy. Flowers mean growth, existing. Stars stand for the fixed beauty of nature. As he progressed in his style, Cummings began using more abstract words as this "metaphorical shorthand." Yes is used as a noun. It is everything positive. If is something hesitant, not certain, not complete: [size=1]yes is a pleasant country: if's wintry (my lovely) let's open the year both is the very weather (not either) my treasure, when violets appear love is a deeper season than reason; my sweet one (and april's where we're)[/size] Metonymy is based on reduction. Cummings was heavy on compression of language: using as little words as possible to say the most. Ther[color=red]e[/color]fore, he uses metonymy. [color=red][Personally, I think that last sentence was a little redundant. I think you'd do better to incorporate it into the sentences before somehow.][/color] It creates a certain thrill when read. [color=red][For a reasearch essay, this seems a little...subjective?][/color] It has a type of novelty. It says much in a few words. This peculiar use of language is just like an author's use of symbols, adding meaning with each use (Baum). Perhaps [color=red][When you started the last description of techniques, you also used perhaps, and you described it as most interesting, too. My advice is to say something like, [i]Also worth mentioning is[/i].] [/color]most worth mentioning is Cumming's use of compression. His use of compression daunts some of his poems and makes them nearly unaccessible to the reader unless they read closely. His earlier work deliberately violated a reader's traditional expectations. Instead, he chose to write individualistically. His 1952 "nonlecture two" exemplifies this: "so far as i am concerned, poetry and every other art is and forever will be strictly and distinctly a question of individuality." When readers would write for explanations of his poems, he would answer them, but harshly (Thompson). Eventually Cummings' attitudes towards his reading audience changed, and his style became more reader-accessible. With the poem "listen," first published in 1923, it is written in a way as to show something as it is happening. To Cummings, the use of language is not faithful, conventional syntax is historical, and is written as if the thoughts, feelings, and sensations have already happened (Baum). But in reality, there's no order to it. It's just an explosion where the senses are attacked all at once. This was Cummings' aim with the compression of language - he tried to recreate an experience from the ground up, without falsifying temporal order, but by writing something as if it were happening right in the poem (the numbers indicate the line spacing): [size=1]1listenthis a dog barks andthis crowd of people and are these steeplesglitter O why eyes houses the smiles5cried gestures buttered with sunlightO, listenleaves in are move push leaves green are crisply writhea new spikes of the by river chuckles see clean whymirrors cries people bark gestures10come O you if come who with listen runme with I quickListen13irrevocably14 (something arrives)15noiselessly in things lives treesat its own pace, certainly silently17comes1819yes20you cannot hurry it with a thousand poems2122you cannot stop it with all the policement in the world[/size] When reading this, we feel just as disoriented as we would if the events were happening to us. But it is nearly unreadable, and those who haven't read a lot of Cummings probably won't be able to swallow it. In its final 1967 version, "(listen)," Cummings carefully rewrote the poem. It is much more reader-friendly, and asks the reader to participate rather than demands (Thompson). [size=1](listen) this a dog barks and how crazily houses eyes people smiles faces streets steeples and eagerly tumbl ing through wonder ful sunlight --look-- selves, stir:writhe o-p-e-n-i-n-g are (leaves;flowers) dreams ,come quickly come run run with me now jump shout (laugh dance cry sing) for it's Spring --irrevocably; and in earth sky trees :every where a miracle arrives (yes) you and i may not hurry it with a thousand poems my darling but nobody will stop it With All The Policemen In The World[/size] [color=red][Here, I would personally mention the obvious difference between the two examples.] [/color]Cummings' later style considers the reader in mind. The poetry is conventional yet screams Cummings at the same time. The poem retains its feeling of everything happening at the very moment, but is much more focused. Cummings was also a painter, and tried to bring the aesthetics of the painters to his poetry. His way of doing so was mainly through typography. The most remedial among these is his use of capitalization. Like Emily Dickinson, he capitalized important nouns for emphasis. However, unlike Dickinson, he did not capitalize the beginning letter of every line in his poems. The reason for this is he didn't want to give unnecessary emphasis. He also didn't capitalize the pronoun "I" as it is traditionally. His use of "i" showed his individualism, and segregates the author from the speaker of the poem. This leaves him free to put emphasis where it truly belongs. Cummings also employs spacing as a typographical tool. Cumming's use of spacing is often to slow down the tempo. Its other uses were to squeeze more meaning out of a poem, and to put extreme emphasis on a particular word by alienating it from parts of the poem. Below is a poem showing how spacing may be used to strain more meaning from a poem: [size=1]l(a le af fa ll s) one l iness[/size] There are many layers of meaning to this poem, but our concern is with spacing. The very look of this poem because of the spacing is like a leaf falling in a spiral pattern, then lying on the ground. Also, the letter "l" looks like the numerical "1" on a keyboard. That is one of the main points of this poem: when a leaf falls to death, it falls alone. Also there is "l(a," the french pronoun for "the," which shows even more oneness. Then there is "one," which immediately catches the eye. If Cummings would have just written the poem regularily, it would just read "a leaf falls/ loneliness," but instead he brings the spatial and aesthetic qualities of the painters and crafts something wholly beautiful, short, and full of meaning (Semansky). Another typographical tool Cummings used was punctuation. Cummings' use of punctuation is tied into spacing in the sense that they slow down the tempo. Some critics proclaim Cummings dots his poetry with too much punctuation, but the punctuation serves as a minor time control. His use of parentheses is also very important. It's another technique of immediacy he uses, which helps to show something instantaneously happening. He usually uses them in pairs, but will often put down only one parenthesis as an opening or closing mark. This shows that the poem is only a fragment of something larger, as if hinting at something unsaid (Baum). Cummings brought the aesthetics of the painters to poetry. He himself was a painter as well, and followed in the footsteps of the cubists. His techniques of immediacy take apart a moment and put it back together, just as the cubists (only they used an actual image), and try to make others see it as he saw it. His early poems were somewhat romantic and traditional, but his later poems show him to be a transcendentalist like Walt Whitman or Ralph Waldo Emerson, and his style to be anything but traditional. His other techniques and his developed style showed him to be a unique, original poet.[/QUOTE][font=Verdana][/font] [font=Verdana][size=1][/size][/font] [font=Verdana][size=1]I hope you didn't mind the switching from quotes to red text half way through; I find that quote annoys me because it seems to segregrate the text from the whole when it is the whole a person should be looking at... or something like that. ^.~ The essay isn't bad, in my opinion, but the thing I think it lacks is something to tie it all together. While I get that this essay is all about Cumming's use of whatevers and his individuality, it seems as if each analysis of style is totally seperate from the one before it, where it should really flow and be linked. A short sentence to lead on from the last technique would probably suffice. Also, I think perhaps you should be less in awe of Cummings whilst writing this. I know this sounds odd, but when reading this, it almost seems that you're saying the same thing about each technique, i.e. it's very effective and interesting or whatever. Perhaps you aren't saying the same thing, but it does come across that way. [/size][/font] [font=Verdana][size=1][/size][/font] [font=Verdana][size=1]I'm not sure exactly how essays are supposed to go in your country, lol. It could be different from place to place. And I don't know what class this is for, either. But if I was marking this, I'd say the problem as I see it is that it comes across as more [i]subjective[/i] than [i]objective[/i]. If the assignment is, you know, to state and clearly explain and justify Cumming's techniques and whether it is good or bad, then I suppose you've done that. ^_^[/size][/font] [font=Verdana][size=1][/size][/font] [font=Verdana][size=1]Hope I helped somewhat. [/size][/font]

[size=1][font=Verdana]Dragonboym2, I have already spoken to you about double posting. In fact, I deleted your post and edited it into your original post, which you have changed [b]back[/b] to a double post. Otakuboards, as a courtesy, [i]does[/i] allow double posting when the post reaches its character limit. However, this is a [i]courtesy,[/i] and is certainly not manditory on my behalf. In future, please respect my decision as a moderator. I also suggest that you refer to the [/font][url="http://otakuboards.com/rules.php?"][b][font=Verdana]rules[/font][/b][/url][font=Verdana].[/font][/size] [font=Verdana][size=1]This thread is closed, and from now on you will not be allowed the curteousy of double posting if you reach the post count. [/size][/font] [font=Verdana][size=1]If you have any problems with this decision, feel free to PM me.[/size][/font] [font=Verdana][size=1]Thread Closed.[/size][/font]

[font=Verdana][size=1]*squees James* Yay! I've been hanging out for that for nigh on a year and a half! Although, admittedly, the WYSIWYG editor really made things simpler. ^_^[/size][/font] [font=Verdana][size=1][/size][/font] [font=Verdana][size=1]So I think you all know my opinion of this idea, lol.[/size][/font]

[font=Verdana][size=1]Since this thread seems to focus more on the upcoming movie than the books, I'm going to move it to Music, Movies and TV Forum. If you have any problems with that, PM me.[/size][/font] [font=Verdana][size=1][/size][/font] [font=Verdana][size=1]Thread Moved.[/size][/font]

[font=Verdana][size=1]Actually, what you need is a rating. As of December 1st last year, all threads in OB Anthology had to be rated for maturity. All threads that aren't rated are closed. To learn more about ratings, see [/size][/font][url="http://otakuboards.com/showthread.php?t=44313"][font=Verdana][size=1][b]this thread[/b][/size][/font][/url][font=Verdana][size=1]. [/size][/font] [font=Verdana][size=1][/size][/font] [font=Verdana][size=1]Feel free to re-create the thread with the appropriate rating.[/size][/font] [font=Verdana][size=1][/size][/font] [font=Verdana][size=1]Thread closed.[/size][/font]

[font=Verdana][size=1]All threads on OB Anthology must be rated for maturity. As of December 1st last year, any threads that aren't rated are to be closed. To learn more about ratings, please see [/size][/font][url="http://otakuboards.com/showthread.php?t=44313"][font=Verdana][size=1][b]this thread[/b][/size][/font][/url][font=Verdana][size=1]. [/size][/font] [font=Verdana][size=1][/size][/font] [font=Verdana][size=1]Feel free to re-create this thread with the appropriate rating. ^_^[/size][/font] [font=Verdana][size=1][/size][/font] [font=Verdana][size=1]Thread Closed.[/size][/font]

[font=Verdana][size=1]A quick reminder to all that this is 55 [b]Fiction[/b]. The rules of the thread clearly state;[color=black] [i]2.) You are not writing poetry, idle thoughts, or anything else that does not fit the above requirements.[/i] I've deleted the posts that are poetry. If anyone wants to argue this or ask me about it, PM me.[/color] [/size][/font]