Transtic Nerve Posted November 20, 2002 Share Posted November 20, 2002 This is just a curious topic for me. I was wondering if anyone here has, is, or would be willing to date someone, regardless of gender, who is outside their race. Or maybe someone who has a different cultural background. My brother is getting married in 7 months to a Puerto Rican girl, who I have nothing against (she gave birth to my beautiful neice, however not the only reason that I like her), and their values and culture is hugely differnet than mine or my families. It's not a abd thing, for I always love learning about new culture and people, but it's just weird. My brother plans on having like...25 people from our side of the family at his wedding... she plans on having 200... I was like... "say what now?" ::faint:: My boyfriend is from England and that culture is also somewhat different, although not so much. He may not be of a different race, but it's still a different culture and it's still having to deal with something different. So I was wondering if anyone here has had to deal with a culture shock or if you've dated/dating a person of different race, how does it differ from your own values and culture and how do you deal with it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Manic Webb Posted November 20, 2002 Share Posted November 20, 2002 Despite my shining, irresistable charm, I've never dated anyone. Yes, yes, I know. I'm just as surprised as you all are. :) I'm a "guy-friend." It's a lonely existance, but somebody has to live it. Anyway, I am fully willing to date any girl of any race. My family has a nice little history of interracial relationships, what with my cousins being partially Filipino and my baby half-sister is part black and part white. I think dating (and even marrying) people of a different culture is a good thing. Being around people of a different culture shows you just how alike all people are and helps you understand the differences. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Valen Posted November 20, 2002 Share Posted November 20, 2002 200? Woah... that's a lot of people... But yeah, I've been in many relationships where we had different cultures... wasn't anything major, but we did have our differences... bit I just payed it no mind, that's one of the best ways to deal with it, or at least that's what I believe is the best way... I don't really see what major difference in culture that was there, besides the language bit. Yeah, she was from El Salvador, but that didn't matter... we were both different religions, that didn't bother us either... I guess as long as you both love eachother you'll be fine... But that's just me... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
James Posted November 20, 2002 Share Posted November 20, 2002 [color=royalblue]I have no problems if it comes to dating someone that is outside my race. In fact, I often find that to be an attractive quality in the other person...in the sense that it makes them interesting and different from me. So yeah, I think different cultures (in dating OR friendships) is cool, it adds an interesting mix to life. :)[/color] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kent Posted November 20, 2002 Share Posted November 20, 2002 Well I would say that I have no hang ups about gettting involved with someone of a different culture or race. I've been involved with a jewish girl and that wasnt anything big at all. We barely had anything different between the two of us besides her being an orthodox jew and me being a confused irish american that still didnt identify with any religion. I would have to go with valen. As long as you "love" each other, things are fine. All though I must say that some times those differences can make for unpredicted troubles. But those troubles are nothing true love cant over come. I gotta say though, since I want to answer the whole question, I dont think I could ever get with a guy. I dont think I need to justify it, but to use the words of homosexuals Ive heard, Im just not like that. Still, its all good if you want to get with anyone. As long as there are descent and honest reasons for your relationship, then everything is just fine. Oh yea, endymion, I feel ya. I was and still am sometimes, the guy friend. It just happens to some of us. But I feel ya... I really do. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
starlight Posted November 20, 2002 Share Posted November 20, 2002 [QUOTE][i]Originally posted by Endymion [/i] [B]Despite my shining, irresistable charm, I've never dated anyone. Yes, yes, I know. I'm just as surprised as you all are. :) I'm a "guy-friend." It's a lonely existance, but somebody has to live it. [/B][/QUOTE] *sigh* same case here... except that im not a "guy" friend.... um... I guess that would make me... a gal friend?:cross: but I dont care if its another race ether, I mean, we are all just people and my school is very... international? lol ;) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rain Posted November 20, 2002 Share Posted November 20, 2002 [color=blue]Heh heh...I'm in the same boat as Starlight and Endymion...and I seem to be the only person in my school who is... Anyway, I wouldn't have a problem with dating someone of a different race or culture. Some older generations might, but that wouldn't bother me...if you love someone, nothing else matters (or so is my understanding ;)).[/color] [QUOTE][i]Originally posted by Transtic Nerve[/i] [b]My brother plans on having like...25 people from our side of the family at his wedding... she plans on having 200... I was like... "say what now?"[/b][/QUOTE] [color=blue]I know how you feel. My brother is marrying a Greek girl, and she has all these relatives she wants to invite to the wedding...I sort of stay out of the way of all that planning stuff.[/color] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
vegeta rocker Posted November 20, 2002 Share Posted November 20, 2002 I never have, but i would be willing to. Everyone where i live is either white or latin, its so integrated that it isn't a culture shock that much. I think people that wouldn't date someone of another race is shallow and unrealistic. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shy Posted November 20, 2002 Share Posted November 20, 2002 [size=1]To be honest, anyone I have ever dated was white... but I don't go around thinking, "Ugh, I can't stand *insert ethnicity here* There is no way that I would ever date them!" For six years my best friend was African-American, so race was never an issue for me. I find it easier to become attached to someone with a similar background and morals just because there is so much about other cultures that I don't know. It would be incredibly to take part in holidays or traditions that had no relevance to me. I am partially Hispanic, partially Irish, and partially American Indian; that would make me the product of several mixed relationships, wouldn't it? -Shy[/size] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Transtic Nerve Posted November 20, 2002 Author Share Posted November 20, 2002 [QUOTE][i]Originally posted by gokents [/i] [B]I gotta say though, since I want to answer the whole question, I dont think I could ever get with a guy. I dont think I need to justify it, but to use the words of homosexuals Ive heard, Im just not like that. [/B][/QUOTE] lol, when I wrote "regardless of gender" I wasn't implying that people should or maybe would want to date someone of the same gender, I was simply stating that the question (would you, have you, etc etc date a person of different race/cultural background) was meant for anyone, gay, straight, or bisexual. For any of you interested, The movie "Monster's Ball" was really good on dealing with the issue of interracial relationships in a place where it's looked down upon. It's really good, and really sad. And Halle Berry is in it... lol Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dan L Posted November 20, 2002 Share Posted November 20, 2002 Races really aren't a problem for me.. but for me, I couldn't get involved in that kind of relationship with a non-christian. Don't judge that statement until you actually read the reason: Ultimately, it's really hard to be with someone that you seriously believe is destined to.. well.. let's just say "A different place entirely".. it really doesn't matter at all whether you are right or not, but the sheer belief that the two of you are destined to spend an eternity, one in heaven and one.. not in heaven, just destroys you. And it is a [i]lot[/i] harder to bring someone to faith, than to lose faith because you don't want to lose that person. So yeah.. I'm not "selective" due to prejudice, but because my beliefs would destroy me.. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pressure Posted November 20, 2002 Share Posted November 20, 2002 [color=purple]It's odd, I don't know why, and it's not because of prejudice or anything, but I have only been attracted to one african-american in my entire life. His name is Shane, he acts caucasian. I don't know why, but I'm just not attracted to people outside of my own skin color. Being an athiest, it is hard to not be attracted to people of other religions, so that isn't an issue.[/color] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sara Posted November 20, 2002 Share Posted November 20, 2002 [size=1]I've never dated....anyone. So I guess the issue has never come up.[/size] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Genkai Posted November 20, 2002 Share Posted November 20, 2002 First girlfriend was black, and I've dated other races than my own as well, I stalk Utada Hikaru, and the person I'm madly in love with now is chinese...... So I don't have a problem with it, sankyuu.... I think most people would..... And DBZCG isnt saying she's reluctant to, she just hasnt been attracted to people other than her race Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Adam Posted November 20, 2002 Share Posted November 20, 2002 It's so hard to find the right person, why limit yourself on something so silly. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rhys Mayiessen Posted November 20, 2002 Share Posted November 20, 2002 The first person I ever dated was actually Romanian (I'm white, well my ancestors were from Ireland, Scottland, and England). After that I liked a guy that was Asian actually I'm still friends with him and the other guy I liked was another Romanian. So I guess you could say that I don't even like my own kind!:p Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wrist cutter Posted November 20, 2002 Share Posted November 20, 2002 I think it'd be kind of strange, myself. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kinetic Posted November 20, 2002 Share Posted November 20, 2002 [QUOTE][i]Originally posted by Shyguy [/i] [B][size=1] For six years my best friend was African-American, so race was never an issue for me. -Shy[/size] [/B][/QUOTE] [color=darkblue] That is the same case for me. Nearly all of my life my best friends have been Hispanic, Muslim, or African-American (right now my best friend is a mix of the last two). [/color] [quote][b][size=1] find it easier to become attached to someone with a similar background and morals just because there is so much about other cultures that I don't know. It would be incredibly to take part in holidays or traditions that had no relevance to me. -Shy[/size] [/B][/QUOTE] [color=darkblue] However, this I only partially agree with. Most of my friends are Muslim and it seemed a lot easier for me to become friends with them. At first it was unusual because I thought I would say something idiotic, but they're just like you and I. No difference really. The only thing, is that they believe something that's only slightly different from Christian (from what I have learned) and that they are fasting until the end of this month (which makes it uncomfortable to eat because I feel bad, but they don't care :p) Although, I'm making them sound different, they're really alike to you and I. [/color] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wrist cutter Posted November 20, 2002 Share Posted November 20, 2002 I think ShyGuy was mainly talking relationships, serious ones. And I can see where he's coming from. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sara Posted November 21, 2002 Share Posted November 21, 2002 [QUOTE][i]Originally posted by wrist cutter [/i] [B]I think it'd be kind of strange, myself. [/B][/QUOTE] [SIZE=1]Your bluntness makes me smile.[/SIZE] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Semjaza Posted November 21, 2002 Share Posted November 21, 2002 I think in a situation like this most people would say they don't see the color, they just see the person. I don't know if that's true or not, because skin color is such an obvious thing. I've gone to mostly black/hispanic schools, and have had many friends that were not white at all. At that time I never really thought about anyone outside of how they treated me in terms of if I liked them or not. I saw all the colors, but it didn't matter. If I didn't go to these places, chances are I'd probably not be so open about it... A lot of my family is pretty racist. As for dating, I don't know. In the end, all I really care about is some compatability. If that person happened to be black or whatever else, so be it. That has yet to happen though, and if it did I'll admit it would probably be pretty weird at first. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mitch Posted November 21, 2002 Share Posted November 21, 2002 [QUOTE][i]Originally posted by Transtic Nerve [/i]This is just a curious topic for me. I was wondering if anyone here has, is, or would be willing to date someone, [b]regardless of gender[/b], who is outside their race. Or maybe someone who has a different cultural background. My brother is getting married in 7 months to a Puerto Rican girl, who I have nothing against (she gave birth to my beautiful neice, however not the only reason that I like her), and their values and culture is hugely differnet than mine or my families. It's not a abd thing, for I always love learning about new culture and people, but it's just weird. My brother plans on having like...25 people from our side of the family at his wedding... she plans on having 200... I was like... "say what now?" ::faint:: My boyfriend is from England and that culture is also somewhat different, although not so much. He may not be of a different race, but it's still a different culture and it's still having to deal with something different. So I was wondering if anyone here has had to deal with a culture shock or if you've dated/dating a person of different race, how does it differ from your own values and culture and how do you deal with it. [/QUOTE] [color=red] You're talking an intimate relationship here, right? Not of another gender I wouldn't. I'm straight as the river does flow, straight as linear is straight. So not in that case. I've never even dated before, so, I'm open to dating someone of the [i]opposite[/i] sex, though.[/color] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Phantom Posted November 21, 2002 Share Posted November 21, 2002 Lol...nope, I would not like to date anyone outside my race..my ethicity whatever...the concept of being with a girl or guy that is not my race is just gross.... Oh wait..lol...ANY GUY OR GIRL is gross to me.. lol...I got my angel...and well, if she was black and was a guy...as long as I love her/him..thats all that truely counts to me. Anyway, hehe. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PiroMunkie Posted November 22, 2002 Share Posted November 22, 2002 [color=indigo]For some reason, I could never see myself with an African-American girlfriend. They, at least in my area, tend to have a major attitude problem. Not too mention our musical taste are almost polar opposites. I have only met one African-American girl with at least a [i]similar[/i] taste in music. We just do not really get along. Other than that, I am pretty open to options. Despite how vast and diverse my school is, all of my friends (boy and girl) are white, with the exceptions of these two girls I know who are both Asian. One is Korean, and the other is Japanese or Chinese... not sure which. It would be odd to be with someone who can speak an entirely different language than you, though. They could say something to you, and you would be totally oblivious to what it meant. That could get irritating.[/color] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sara Posted November 22, 2002 Share Posted November 22, 2002 [b]They could say something to you, and you would be totally oblivious to what it meant.[/b] [size=1]Teh, happens to me all the time. Stupid computer nerds. Stupid me for hanging out with them all the time. o0[/size] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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