The Truth...

[Red]

[b]Shy.. I would not even count this person as a friend anymore, regardless of how he feels, someone's secrets are a sacred display of trust if they choose to tell someone else.

I don't know you all too well Shy, as I've only had one or two conversations with you over AIM. Regardless of this, I still think of you the same way. Whoever discontinues trying to be friends with you because of your sexuality doesn't deserve to be friends with you.[/b]

[sydney]

Shy, if being Gay is part of who you are then you shouldnt have to lie about it. People should be able to accept you for who you are.

I really dont mind that you are gay, and anyone else who respects you for who you are will understand.

[Schrat]

shy, its your desicion to make....if you want to be homosexual, then thats your desicion. I dont agree with you at all, im actual a little homo-fobic, but i entitly you to your desicion.

I think you should tell your freinds and family, they should know, they are the ones that love you, and you shouldnt hide something that big from them....

good luck~schrat

[Shy]

[size=1]Hmm, I've been struggling with how to respond to everyone's thoughts on this; but I am more than thankful that everyone has been so kind to me. Your understanding means a lot more to me than you might think.

There are some really great friends here at OB, and I'm really fortunate to have some of them as my friends. ^_^

And yes, I think that it should be [i]my[/i] decision about whether or not to tell everyone. (Ironically, there is a slight chance that some of mr IRL friends might end up reading this somehow, hi Tim and/or Steve). But if he does choose to tell people, I will be ready to handle whatever scrutiny I get for it.

Thanks everyone,

-Josh[/size]

[Mitch]

[color=red] You are welcome. We weren't saying you should tell, that's your decision through and through. I was just saying it would be the best thing to do.[/color]

[Shaun]

Shy, I agree with Ginny for the most part. BUT I have always believed that no matter who you're dealing with, you gotta be a good example. I am not going to look at you or talk to you any differently than before, even though I don't agree with your choice. (same here as Ginny, don't flame me!) I want to still be your friend, and nothing can change that. I have a few gay friends. They know how I feel about it, and respect that. I respect their choices as well. That part of them isn't the reason they're my friends anyway. Who's business is that other than yours anyway? Truth is good, but to dwell on it becomes dangerous. Hope we can still talk and have fun on AIM as always. See ya around!:)

[Charles]

I know that I'm coming into this relatively late, but I feel that a friend is someone that one can confide in. If I'm placing my trust in a friend, especially concerning intimate details of my life, I'm doing so with a firm understanding that they're there to listen and lead me in the right direction, if necessary.

As you and others have said, this is your life, your personal business, and it's your obligation to "come out" whenever and however you wish to. When you do, I'm sure that those closest to you will accept you for who you are. They might be taken back at first, but if your sexuality doesn't matter to us, it certainly shouldn't matter to people who have known you and grown with you.

To me, you're still the same cool guy with a great sense of humor, who loves Duck Tales and Captain Planet. So, I wish you the best of luck in letting those around you know your secret, as opposed to someone who has no business speaking of it.

As long as you accept yourself unconditionally, and be proud of who you are, I'm sure that others will be proud of you. Truth, like surgery, may hurt, but it cures.

[TheShinje]

[color=red] I really don't have much of an opinion that differs from what has been already said, My beliefs tell be that it is wrong, however it is not my place to judge. What you did here takes alot of guts. It is not easy in this world to be gay, and i really have an issue with people who shove their beliefs around like they own the place, so like veryone here has said, I will not think of you any differently, to me, you're still the same Shyguy that moderates the anime forums. It is a hard topic to bring to family. Just try to be strong, call on whatever brings you peace and it shall give you the strength to face the trials ahead. [/color]

[Guest Projekt[Navi]]

I give props to ShyGuy for being serious and honest in his way of life .. its c00 to be what you want to be .. at first I thought you we're kidding, but after reading all of the replys of the page .. i realized you we're serious ... so now I feel bad

" The first step is too admit " - Lisa

Got that right_

[Shinobi]

wow, as everyone else said, you must have alot of guts, to tell a community of 3000 + that you are gay. You should not be ashamed of it, if you want to be so, then tell the whole ****** world! I was abit suprised though, i would never have geuss, you did do a good job of keeping it a secret, but you shouldn't need to!!! Mostly everyone has said what i wanted so say already. Just hang in there.

[Rain]

[color=blue][size=1]ShyGuy, I think you're a really strong person to tell everyone here that you're gay. And I admire you for it. Don't ever feel like you have to keep something secret just because some people might not like it. It won't do any good. You're fine just the way you are, and if someone doesn't want to accept that, well, it's their loss.[/size][/color]

[Dan L]

[b]exerpts from Christian Worship Songs[/b]

[i]"Come as you are, don't change a thing...
...His love for you will never die"[/i]

(by Jacqui Vasques (sp?))

[i]"Come just as you are to worship
Come just as you are before your God"[/i]

(by Brian Doerkeson)

[i]"This is who I'm meant to be, I know you have chosen me"[/i]

(by Brenton Brown)


basically, it doesn't matter what you think of the worship side of things. Those exerpts are very true, whether you believe in God or not. You shouldn't need to change yourself in order to have others love you for who you are. That defeats the whole objective of unconditional love.

As a christian, I believe that God loves everyone regardless of what their personal preferences are, in aany area. As Christians, we shouldn't really be any different (I'm glad to say that I haven't seen a Christian say anything different in this thread).

Ultimately, my belief is that if God wants to change you, he will, if you let him. But it's not for us to decide how, when, or if you should change. It doesn't matter what you see as sin, all of us do it on a regular basis, whether Christian or not, and whether big things or small things.. no-one should be denied because of what they have done, what they do, or what they will do, regardless of whether you see it as wrong or not.

[GinnyLyn]

[color=crimson]*Is in FULL agreement with Deus* That's what I was trying to say earlier. He's just better at saying it. ^^[/color]

[Roxie Faye]

[color=#9933ff]Arg. I haven't had anytime to reply to this thread at all until now, and I haven't looked at any posts other than shy's first one, so forgive me for the lastness in this, and the fact that i might have repeated things people have said.

Shy, your "friend" is not a friend, because, if he was, he'd know that your personal life is your personal life.

I won't see you any differently, and neitehr should anyone else. You're still Shy who mods the anime section. You're still the same Josh/Joshy/Joshii/Yoshi/Yoshii that you always were, and always will be.

As for the truth, there are certain times to tell the truth and tell a lie. I think smal white lies are okay. I mean, if you visit a sick friend two days in a row, and the second day, they ask you if they look any better, and they really don't, you aren't going to say "no. you look horrible." Most people would just smile and say, "yeah. you're looking better." I think that kind of a lie is alright.[/color]

[Dan L]

New thought of the day:

[i][b]Truth exposes truth[/b][/i]

meaning: If you lie about something, then fair enough.. you'll avoid someone's feelings being hurt, you'll save yourself from trouble, you'll protect yourself from the way someone may feel about the truth, but this is all in the short term. When people eventually find out that they were lied to (and they more often do than don't), they will be even more hurt than if you told them the truth from the start. This may not seem to apply to all situations, but that's all because we make a false justification of our actions because "it doesn't do any harm really".. but we fail to see that by creating an atmosphere of lies we make the truth even more unbearable on the day when we must all face it. That doesn't mean we have to shout every truth from the top of a rooftop, or embarrass people in public with the truth, but rather, don't let yourself fall into the trap of thinking that little "white" lies (notice how they almost sound sweet, due to the wording) are any less lies than the bigger ones.

But anyway, my real point is this: The truth doesn't make things better. Like when Shy told his friend, things didn't get any better. By telling the truth we aren't going to have a perfect life, and live without any worries whatsoever, but instead we are going to live a life of truth, and of acceptance of everything that is wrong in our lives. By letting people know the truth about us and what we think, we uncover their true opinions on our [i]true selves[/i].


Meh.. that's my little(ish) rant on truth.. interpret it as you will..

And no, I don't tell the truth all the time. I never said I did, but I happen to believe that I should, despite the fact that it is immensely difficult, and doesn't always make me look good (glorification shouldn't be my goal).