RPG Quest For Glory I

[The Harlequin]

[font=gothic][color=crimson]Lacroix: You'll adjust soon enough. Besides, I can [I]catch[/I] fish, but do you have any idea how bad a cook I am? Not just of fish, but of anything? That's part of the reason I'm so thin. I can't eat my own damn cooking. And I normally don't eat much anyway, but that's beside the point.

Alastuin: You want me to be your housewife?

Lacroix: No, I was just pointing out I can't do [I]everything[/I].

Alastuin: You still come too damn close.

Lacroix: I'm a survivor. I have to do everything.

[I]He looked down at her, and actually managed a smile. He held her closer, resting his head on hers. They stood like that a long moment, before he briskly pulled away and got down to business.[/I]

Lacroix: One, you need a long, dark cloak. And we need to work on your manner...

Alastuin: It's all about your image isn't it?

Lacroix: It helps keep me alive. More importantly, it makes people stay away from me.

Alastuin: Point taken.

[I]Lacroix wandered over to a foot locker beside the bed, and drew out a long black cloak, made of some soft material. It seemed a few inches too short for him, so it fitted Alastuin perfectly.[/I]

Lacroix: You feel like a walk?

Alastuin: I think it would be best. Besides, I imagine you have work to do in Spielburg.

Lacroix: Why not. Coming?

[I]The walked out of the cave, Lacroix pulling undergrowth back over the entrance. The set off towards Spielburg, saying little, but walking very close together.[/color][/font]

[Ravenstorture]

[color=darkgreen][font=gothic]Alastuin: Hmmm, I feel like a fledgeling....

Lacroix: Right... o.0;;

Alastun: Well, night is falling, and I am hungry. What say ye to a counter meal at the ye Olde Katta's Tail inn?

Lacroix: Whatever. Go there often?

Alastuin: Never been there before in my life. Which is why I want to go...

[i]They strolled through the back streets of Speilburg, smiling at the masses of scared people that fled from the wicked aura of the pair. Alastuin took Lacroix's arm and held it tightly, becoming immensely happy at the prospect of never being alone again. Her life had been hell, and now it was over.
The inn sailed into veiw, and sounds of mayhem flowed from it's doors. A stained glass bay window smashed outwards, a barmaid falling into the gutter, fleeing the scene as fast as her dumpy legs could carry her. Alastuin slowed, lacroix did not.[/i][/font][/color]

[enigma]

[COLOR=blue][I]OOC: Hmm, I don't know. I thought that this RPG would be a light-hearted, jestful story based on it's original counterpart, but it's turned out to be too serious for my liking once I compared it to the original. Count me out.[/COLOR][/I]

[The Harlequin]

[font=gothic][color=crimson][I]Lacroix walked in, and surveyed the room. The bar brawl halted. Somewhat suddenly. Just as suddenly, the participants seemed to find a pressing need to carry their recreation elsewhere. They all filed out, entered a tavern up the street, and continued their fight. Lacroix sighed in contempt, and sat at a shadowy table in the corner, his back to the room. Alastuin sat beside him. Lacroix gestured for a meal for them both, telling the tavernkeeper in no uncertain terms it had better not have fish in it. Alastuin looked at him quizzically for the last bit.[/I]

Lacroix: You've had fish most of your life. Time to try something new.

Alastuin: Right...

[I]Lacroix suddenly shot his hand down, and was greeted by a cry of surprise and pain. He sighed again, stood and turned. He looked down at the wouldbe thief. He was holding his thumb, pressing it against the wrist. The thief attempted a kick, which Lacroix caught with his other hand. A kick of his own brought the thief to his knees.[/I]

Lacroix: You're obviously not a local. Do you know who I am?

[I]There was no response. Lacroix pressed harder on the man's thumb, and received a gesture indicating a negative response.[/I]

Lacroix: Heard of The Archon? If not, then those fools at the guild have been lax in their duty.

[I]Lacroix pulled the man to his feet by the scruff of his neck. He threw him backwards, and the man rolled over the table, agilely landing on his feet. He took a chair, and Lacroix sat back down.[/I]

Lacroix: So who are you, why the hell are you here, and what the hell do you think you're going to do with that dagger? In any order.

[I]The thief looked a little sheepish, and resheathed his knife.[/font][/color][/I]

[Ravenstorture]

[color=darkgreen][font=gothic]Alastuin: My my, aren't we charming with the strangers...

[i]Lacroix glared at her dangerously. Alastuin undid her cloak so they man's eyes fell on her body like wet iron.[/i]

Alastuin: What is your name?

Stranger: Tyrael...

Alastuin: Tyrael, please stop staring at me or I will let go of Lacroix.

Lacroix: What?

[i]Alastuin tightened her grip under the table. Lacroix's expression didn't waver, but he paled slightly and his breathing slowed considerably. Tyrael pulled his eyes from her form. The Tavenrkeeper placed a large platter of roast duck and lamb before Alastuin with a flourish. There was hot bread and a pitcher of wine to accompany it. [/i]

Alastuin: Eat with us, sir, and tell us of your travels...[/color][/font]

[The Unholy Newt]

[i]Tyrael was rather nervous sittiing with this pair. The man looked extremely unhinged and looked like he could snap at any moment. The woman was attractive, but not his type.[/i]

Tyrael: Well, I haven't travelled that much, but I do get upto some fun things around this little town. I guess you have heard about the incidents last night. The five murders. That was me. And now, in fear of executuin, I need some quick cash to get me out of here. See, I've been looking at that noticeboard at the Adventurers Guild and I reckon that could get me out of here and set up somewhere else. But, some help would be nice. Are you in?

[The Harlequin]

[font=gothic][color=crimson][I]Lacroix flicked an eyebrow at this.[/I]

Lacroix: I've been hired for it twice over already. So yes, I would suppose that suffices as "being in". More importantly however, what the hell are you doing killing people in this city? Are you really that sloppy?

Tyrael: Just having a little fun...

Lacroix: And fearing execution? I assure you, chances are you'd never even come up as a suspect. Suspicious deaths are generally attributed to the guild of thieves itself, rather than individual members, or more frequently, to me. Didn't anyone explain anything to you?

Tyrael: I didn't really hang around long enough for anyone to explain anything.

Lacroix: If that is a habit, then your survival to this age should be commended.

[I]Lacroix lapsed back into silence, gesturing for Alastuin to fill the gap if she so wished.[/font][/color][/I]

[Ravenstorture]

[color=darkgreen][font=gothic]Alastuin: I don't think that I will be going anywhere he isn't, so yeah... I guess I'm in. By the way, you do realise that because of these murders, I probably won't be allowed to leave the city... not that it should be a problem.

Tyrael: Why is that?

Alastuin: The guild of thieves will be suspected. I am a prominent member.

Lacroix: You stupid, stupid woman.

Alastuin: The reason I am a prominent member is because I am the only female member. Believe me, if I could remain covert, I would. If I could have my way, in fact, I would have nothing to do with that stupid bunch of blithering idiots that call themselves lockpickers, I've seen a pained bull making a quieter entry. And talk about -

[i]Lacroix silenced her rant with his hand. She reddened and busied herself with the wine.[/i]

Lacroix: As you said, it shouldn't be a problem. As for you, Sir Tyrael, we will be joining you.[/color][/font]

[The Harlequin]

[font=gothic][color=crimson]Lacroix: Which I believe requires us to head to the castle.

[I]He rose, and clasped his cloak around his body.[/I]

Tyrael: Now?

[I]Lacroix favoured him with a grim look and a humourless laugh.[/I]

Lacroix: I'm the most wanted man in Spielburg, and I'm about to go the castle, openly this time (Which no one commented on), and allow myself to be surrounded a hell of a lot of armed guardsmen, and anyone else the Baron feels like. You think I don't look forward to this?

[I]Alastuin looked over at Tyrael. They shared a confused glance.[/I]

Tyrael: You lost me on the sharp turn right there at the end...

Lacroix: Simple. This will be the most fun I've had in years.

Alastuin: So you do have some emotions. They're just to imcomprehensible to be considered normal.... or even emotions at all by most people...

Lacroix: Perhaps that's close to the truth. We'll pursue it some other time if you wish. For now however, I believe we have an appointment.[/font][/color]

[Ravenstorture]

[color=darkgreen][font=gothic][i]Alastuin took the offered hand from Lacroix and the three left the bar, full and refreshed. They headed north, uphill and out of the city, into quite farmland and gentle countryside. The castle loomed in the distance. Night had fallen but the moon had not yet risen, so the land was steeped in black. Human shadows lurked metres away, ignored by the party. Lacroix set a quick pace, holding Alastuin's arm to his side tightly. She clutched to it as if it were southern minnow caviar. Suddenly, the outer walls of the castle were within scouting distance, and they stopped beneath a tree to catch their breath. Only Alastuin had anything to catch.[/i]

Lacroix: Main doors?

Alastuin: Now wouldn't be a very good time to tell you that I have no idea what is going on, would it?

[i]They stared up at the castle. Lights were ablaze, and it looked as if the armies were feasting inside. Raucous yelling and crazed music floated from the arched windows.[/i][/color][/font]

[The Harlequin]

[font=gothic][color=crimson]Lacroix: Ah, the nightlife. Shall we indulge?

Tyrael: We're not here to party...

Lacroix: I wasn't intending to. Come, there's a sally port round the side.

[I]Lacroix led them off to the east side of the castle, ignoring the sentries that patrolled the area. A few even waved to him...

Lacroix eventually reached a narrow gate, with a small gatehouse beside it. Lacroix kicked the door open, and there was a moment of silence. Then the gate was suddenly opened. Lacroix walked out, and beckoned them to follow him.

He directed them through several long passageways, ignoring the by-ways which would have been far less conspicious. The few soldiers moving about paid him no heed.

The guards at the doors to the great hall however, required a little more convincing. Lacroix looked at them for a moment, a demonic grin rending his face. They stepped aside quickly.

Lacroix listened intently for a moment. The Baron was proposing a toast to something, or someone. Lacroix knocked the doors wide, and walked in. A large table, laden with food, stretched across the large room. Several smoky firepits were arrayed along each side. The room was hazy, both with the smoke from the firepits, and from the assorted drugs being smoked... Several scantily clad dancing girls served as waiters. Every place at the table was filled, yet many were already inebriated to the point of falling out of their chairs. Lacroix cleared three such patrons away, and gestured for the others to sit down. Lacroix stood behind the centre seat, leaning casually on its wooden frame. The Baron, already on his feet, was incensed.[/I]

Baron: What is the meaning of this....

Lacroix: Ladies and gentlemen, if such exist, my apologies for interrupting your revelries. Should there actually be a full set of wits about the collective in this room, then perhaps you would understand that it would be best if you left.

[I]Both Tyrael and Alastuin looked surprised as those able to got up and walked out. Those unable to stayed were they were, oblivious. Soon, the only noise was the snores of the drunk.[/I]

Baron: Let me guess, you've finally come to kill me?

Lacroix: Not yet. Actually, I believe you're looking for adventurers. You have them.

[I]The Baron alternated between looking confused, irate, happy and amused for a while. At last he sat down, defeated. He looked up at them, an almost despairing look in his eyes.[/I]

Baron: Care for a drink?[/font][/color]

[The Unholy Newt]

[i]Tyrael now knew that he was right. The Archon was definitely unhinged. He accepted the Baron's offer for a drink, a very strong drink and they discussed this Hero of Spielburg business. They decided the best course of action was to find the Baronet first. They questioned the Baron and learned that the Baronet had ridden out on his daily monster hunts and only his horse had returned. On that particular day he had gone out to vanquish the evil troll that lived in a cave north of the castle. No one dared to try and see if he was still alive because they feared being eaten by the troll.

The trio decided they would stay the night at the castle and begin in the morning.[/i]

[The Harlequin]

[font=gothic][color=crimson]OOC: Hmmm. Think I'll ressurect an old rpg scene of mine...

IC: [I]Lacroix started the night out restless, unable to sleep. The bed he had been given was somewhat more spacious than he was used to, and far more opulent. He'd probably have better luck sleeping on the floor.

After a few hours, he sighed, and arose. From his earlier visits, he knew of all the byways and passages that riddled the castle, and all the entrances. Walking over to the large, empty wardrobe, he stepped inside the door and crawled into one of the shelves, using his legs to push him into what appeared to be a wall. It swung open soundlessly. Apparently the Baron was a little less certain of himself than he seemed....

Lacroix slid into a passageway, landing on his hands easily and rolling to his feet. He listened intently, but the castle was silent. Taking a short moment to orient himself, he set off along the tunnel, traversing the winding turns designed to confuse an attacker with ease. Eventually, he ended up in the library.

The library entrance was behind one of the shelves, of course, yet it opened an entire section of books. The interesting part was that if you removed one of the 20 or so books that made up the door, or even all of them, you were unable to tell there was a door there. And there was no wall at the end of passageway that was visible from the inside. And no wooden backing. Yet you couldn't see the black gap. Lacroix still hadn't worked it out.

As was his custom, Lacroix knocked the door, whatever it was, open, then dove out silently, coming up on his feet in a catlike stance.

Well...he was intending to. This time however, on his way out, he ran into another human body. His shoulder struck the being in the stomach. Lacroix immediately rolled away, and looked down. Alastuin lay there, looking up at him slightly surprised, but apparently uninjured. Lacroix gave her a hand up, and actually managed an apology.[/I]

Lacroix: Couldn't sleep either?

Alastuin: I rarely do.

Lacroix: Alright. Question 2. Why were you going through tomes such as these?

[I]Another reason the entrance was safe was that it was contained behind the tomes on demonology. Lacroix had read them, they had no idea what they were talking about, but it still served to intimidate the foolish.[/I]

Alastuin: Nothing more interesting to read.

Lacroix: Even though they aren't in the least bit factual?

Alastuin: How was I to know? Or care...

[I]Lacroix reached behind him and took a book at random. Leading Alastuin over to one of the reading tables, he sat her down and opened it, reading through the book. Whenever he came to an error, and there were a lot of them, he'd point it out. He was, however, nice enough not to corrupt her with true knowledge. Eventually, dawn found them. Lacroix lay back, against the table, Alastuin curled up next to him, her head in his lap. Seemed to surprise several librarians. Not their presence, they were used to Lacroix slipping in and out, just that he actually tolerated company.[/font][/color][/I]

[The Unholy Newt]

[i]Tyrael walked out into the courtyard at dawm to meet the other two. They were waiting at the stables with the horses the Baron had given them. Without a word the mounted the horses and left the castle. They travelled through a garden that belonged to a Centaur farmer. They stopped to ask him about the cave where the Baronet had ridden to.[/i]

[b]Centaur:[/b] That area of the forest is a dangerous one you know. There is a very dangerous Troll that lives in it, and they say that the cave is occupied by an evil sorceror who enchants all who enter. That is probably what became of the Baron's son.

[b]Tyrael:[/b] Thank you.

[i]Tyrael threw the Centaur a few gold pieces and they continued on. By about midday they reached sight of the cave. A large troll was sleeping outside the entrance. They attempted to sneak quietly past the troll but as they neared him, Alastuin stepped on branch and snapped it, waking the creature . . .[/i]

ooc: Not a very good post I know, but I really couldn't be bothered at the moment.

[Ravenstorture]

[color=darkgreen][font=gothic]OOC: Yeah, dump it all on me why don't you!

[i]Alastuin swore silently and leapt to the side as the monstrous creature passed a violent and acrid wind and stretched, opening eyes slit with thick, horizontal pupils not unlike that of a donkey. His leathery skin scraped over itself as the troll stood and lumbered deeper into the cave to a freshwater spring, releiving itself and then taking a drink, in that order. Alastuin considered getting up and walking off that moment, but the malevolent gleam in Lacroix's eyes across the entrance kept her deep in the shrubbery.[/i]

Troll: Fee, fi, fo, fum... what a load of dog's bollocks...[/color][/font]

[The Harlequin]

[font=gothic][color=crimson]OOC: I resurrected this, at Raven's urging albeitly, but still... So I'm doing this my way.

IC: [I]Never daunted by a beast far larger than him, with more more physical strength, and the power to regenerate any wound except burns, The Archon walked into the clearing, arms folded. The troll turned, and roared at him. A bellowing cry, that shook the trees, and sent woodland creatures scurrying away. Lacroix's expression didn't change.[/I]

Lacroix: Yeah? Well **** you!

[I]The troll seemed confused by this. He probably understood a bit of human tongue, but not enough to decipher Lacroix's words. The fact that the human hadn't moved, and didn't seemed scared, probably confused it even more.

After a few minutes of deliberation, during which no one moved (though Lacroix somehow managed to convey a sense of boredom with moving a muscle), the troll made up what served for a mind. It lumbered towards the unmoving assassin.

It stopped about two feet away from him, puzzled. It looked at him closer, trying to determine whether Lacroix was really alive. Lacroix answered the question with a dagger strike to the eye.

The troll stumbled back, clutching its face. Lacroix calmly took his pack of his back, pulling out a torch, flint and steel. Lighting it, he turned and put the torch in the same place the dagger had been.

Though a troll is nearly invulnerable to normal weapons, it caught like kindling, the fires eclipsing the roaring beast in seconds. As it burned, the troll dancing around in agony in front of him, Lacroix's expression remained as it had for the entire incident. When only ashes were left, he looked over at the other two.[/I]

Lacroix: Well?[/font][/color]

[Ravenstorture]

[color=darkgreen][font=gothic]Alastuin: Oh my god, you have no idea how much I want to have sex with you right now...

Lacroix: Right....

Tyrael: I'm going to ignore that. Well done, Lacroix... that was over surprisingly quickly.

Alastuin: Where to next?

Lacroix: Back to the castle for an ale.

Alastuin: Ale?

Lacroix: Ale, bed, same thing.

Tyrael: I am severely regretting bringing you two along with me on this trip...

[i]Alastuin motioned to the pile of ash on the floor and Tyrael reconsidered.

Together, they returned to the castle where a stunned Baron admitted them room for the night.[/i]

OOC: Haha, serves you right for staying offline for so long, Newt! The love-crazed freaks will run riot in your RPG yet!!![/color][/font]