Guest Chris Posted January 25, 2003 Share Posted January 25, 2003 [color=green]have you ever heard a question that was just so stupid that you had to repeat it? please share them with me if you have. here are some of mine. how do you open a door? when two woman are together, how do they deside which one of them is going to fertalize the egg?(i refrazed that one due to content) why do guys like it when women kiss? can women sperm? have you ever laminated your topai?(sp?) that's all i can remember right now. and if this is against the rules, sorry.[/color] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gabe Posted January 25, 2003 Share Posted January 25, 2003 How much is a 30 cent cone at McDonalds? Daniel, Whats your name? (Lol My cousin asked me that) If you mated a Bulldog and a Sh[b]i[/b]tzu would you get a Bullsh[b]i[/b]t? That's all I can think of the top of my head.. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bing Posted January 25, 2003 Share Posted January 25, 2003 [size=1][color=darkblue]Why can't I hear the minutes silence? (Said by dumb relative) Do I look good in this?, Am I ugly? (Said by pretty friend) Who is Dave Grohl? (Said by dumb child) Why can't I swim across to France? (Stupid girl on ferry) Most of them are things that I've overheard in other people's conversations. Enough said.[/color][/size] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GinnyLyn Posted January 25, 2003 Share Posted January 25, 2003 [color=royal blue]A little something I picked up somewhere, just in case this topic doesn't last. ;) Can fat people go skinny-dipping? You can't have everything. Where would you put it? If you throw a cat out a car window does it become kitty litter? If a chronic liar tells you he is a chronic liar do you believe him? If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why does he keep doing it? If you have a friend who works for the Psychic Friends Network, should you plan a surprise birthday party for them? Why is it called a TV set when you only get one? When people lose weight, where does it go? If a mute child swears, does his mother make him wash his hands with soap? Did the early settlers ever go on a camping trip? Why do airlines call flights nonstop? Won't they all stop eventually? If olive oil comes from olives, where does baby oil come from? If you dive into a pool of dry ice, can you swim without getting wet? Why are there Braille signs on drive-up ATM's? If a tree falls in the forest and no one is around to see it do the other trees make fun of it? If 7-11 is open 24 hours a day, 365 days a year, why are there locks on the doors? Does the Postmaster General need a stamp of approval? If it's zero degrees outside today and it's supposed to be twice as cold tomorrow, how cold is it going to be? How many people thought of the Post-It note before it was invented but just didn't have anything to jot it down on? If con is the opposite of pro, is Congress the opposite of progress? How does a shelf salesman keep his store from looking empty? If the #2 pencil is the most popular, why's it still #2? If God sneezes...what should you say? If Fed Ex and UPS were to merge, would they call it Fed UP? If a turtle doesn't have a shell, is he homeless or naked? What is the speed of dark? There are 24 hours in a day, and 24 beers in a case. Coincidence? If the cops arrest a mime, do they have to tell him he has the right to remain silent? Why do they sell a pound cake that only weighs 12 ounces? Do one legged ducks swim in circles? What did we do before the Law of Gravity was passed? If a parsley farmer is sued, can they garnish his wages? Why doesn't superglue stick to its container? Why is it so hard to remember how to spell mnemonic? What is the probability that something will happen according to the odds? If nothing ever sticks to Teflon, how do they make Teflon stick to the pan? What happens if you get scared half to death twice? If a jogger runs a the speed of sound can he still hear his walkman? What is another word for thesaurus? If people from Poland are called Poles, why aren't people from Holland called Holes? What do sheep count when they can't sleep? Since cats always land on their feet and jelly bread always lands jelly-side down, what happens if you tie jelly bread to the back of a cat? Why do you need a driver's license to buy liquor when you can't drink and drive? If a dog sweats through his tongue, why does he have armpits? Do infants enjoy infancy as much as adults enjoy adultery? Would a fly without wings be called a walk? Should vegetarians eat animal crackers? Why is 'abbreviation' such a long word? If you spend your day doing nothing, how do you know when you're done? If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular? How come you press harder on a remote control when you know the battery is dead? What do you do when you see an endangered animal that eats only endangered plants? How can there be self-help groups? Ballerinas are always on their toes. Why don't they just get taller ballerinas? If a book about failures doesn't sell, is it a success? Why do they call it disposable douche? Is there a kind of douche you keep after using? If an orange is orange, why isn't a lime called a green or a lemon called a yellow? What part of the monkey do you use a monkey wrench on? If the funeral procession is at night, do folks drive with their lights off? How can the weather be hot as hell one day and cold as hell another? How much deeper would the ocean be if sponges didn't grow in it? If the plural of tooth is teeth, why isn't the plural of booth beeth? Why are there interstate highways in Hawaii? Is there reserved parking for non-handicapped people at the Special Olympics? Isn't it a bit unnerving that doctors call what they do "practice"? Why does bottled water have an expiration date? Does anybody ever vanish with a trace? If you try to fail, and succeed, which have you done? If the Energizer Bunny attacks someone, is it charged with battery? If a bus station is where a bus stops, and a train station is where a train stops, why do I have a work station on my desk? What hair color do they put on the driver's licenses of bald men? Life is hard compared to what? When your pet bird sees you reading the newspaper, does he wonder why you're just sitting there, staring at carpeting? Why do we have hot water heaters? Shouldn't there be a shorter word for monosyllabic? Are there seeing eye humans for blind dogs? Why is there an eject button on the VCR remote? Don't you have to get up to get to the tape? If a cow laughed, would milk come out her nose? If someone with multiple personalities threatens to kill herself, is it considered a hostage situation? If you take a shower, where do you put it? How is it possible to have a civil war? If the folks at the psychic hotlines were really psychic, wouldn't they call you first? When sign makers go on strike, is anything written on their signs? How come Superman could stop bullets with his chest, but always ducked when someone threw a gun at him? Aren't all generalizations false? If you play a blank tape at full volume and have a mime for a neighbor, will he complain? Why do they report power outages on TV? Do Lipton employees take coffee breaks? If vegetarians eat vegetables, what do humanitarians eat? Why is it that when you transport something by car, it's called a shipment, but when you transport something by ship, it's called cargo? Why do fat chance and slim chance mean the same thing? After eating, do amphibians have to wait an hour before getting out of the water? If you have an open mind why don't your brains fall out? Could someone ever get addicted to counseling? If so, how could you treat them? Why is there an expiration date on sour cream? If a word in the dictionary were misspelled, how would we know? What's another word for synonym? Is there a Dr. Salt? What happened to the first 6 ups? Just before someone gets nervous, do they experience cocoons in their stomach? If you're traveling at the speed of light and you turn your headlights on, what happens? What is a free gift? Aren't all gifts free? Is it true that cannibals don't eat clowns because they taste funny? How do you know when you're out of invisible ink? Do fish get cramps after eating? If you can read the marking, isn't that end already up? Why is it when a door is open it's ajar, but when a jar is open it's not adoor? If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy her friends? Why is a person who plays the piano called a pianist, but a person who drives a race car not called a racist? Why is lemon juice mostly artificial ingredients but dishwashing liquid contains real lemons? If you're cross-eyed and have dyslexia can you read correctly? How do they get a deer to cross at that yellow road sign? What was the best thing before sliced bread? Why do we drive on parkways but park on driveways? Who tows the tow trucks when they break down? Why are they called buildings, when they're already finished? Shouldn't they be called builts? Why isn't phonetic spelled the way it sounds? Do you need a silencer if you are going to shoot a mime? How do you know when yogurt goes bad? 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Deedlit Posted January 25, 2003 Share Posted January 25, 2003 [color=009966]LOL :rotflmao::haha: Those are great, GinnyLyn! ^_- Here's one that I got from a DragonLance book. A chicken with its neck wrung is different from a chicken with its head cut off, but does it matter to the chicken?[/color] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rhys Mayiessen Posted January 25, 2003 Share Posted January 25, 2003 [color=navy]Oooooh! I have a really stupid one and I said it. Person: Downloading Heavy Metal. Me: Oh so you like Heavy Metal do you? Yeah its not that great but you can see how stupid I can be sometimes!:p [/color] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bremma Posted January 25, 2003 Share Posted January 25, 2003 Heh.. here's one. WHat does chcolate taffy taste like? (me.. i was wondering like what TYPE of chcolate.. but that was lost in translation...) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The One Posted January 25, 2003 Share Posted January 25, 2003 [color=darkred]I seem to remember a similar topic to this posted by ...uh...was it Sailor Stardust? Yeah, anyway, I find these funny, but I have to admit, I have uttered some of these before, or ones similar. I'm sure everyones opinion of me just dropped 10 points, but there you go. [i]How do you know when yogurt goes bad? [/i] I don't actually know. Now I feel even more stupid...[/color] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Deedlit Posted January 26, 2003 Share Posted January 26, 2003 [color=009966]lol That was one that GL posted. No one's opinion of you dropped at all. ^_-[/color] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Chris Posted January 26, 2003 Share Posted January 26, 2003 [color=green]i wouldn't say [b]no one's[/b]. those are very good ginny. here's some more if you ask your mother for one egg, and she gives you two, and you eat both, who many teeth does a crocadile have? why is a dinosour? how did you get on my buddy list?(said by me three times... don't ask)[/color] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dan L Posted January 26, 2003 Share Posted January 26, 2003 "Is your phone turned on?" (asked over the phone) Not quite the same as what most of you have said.. but that was just such a stupid question I considered sending the guy away... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
L.A. Rod. Posted January 26, 2003 Share Posted January 26, 2003 "If space has intelligent life, is there stupid life, too?" Some guy in my class, I started laughing later in the day. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
amibasuki Posted January 26, 2003 Share Posted January 26, 2003 [FONT=arial]heh, this one over-the-phone telemarketer asked me a question somewhat similar to yours. she asked, "Does your phoneline work?" I told her she had the wrong number and hung up the phone. people who ask questions like that in seriousness (if that's even a word :p) need to be smacked.[/FONT] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GinnyLyn Posted January 26, 2003 Share Posted January 26, 2003 [color=royal blue]How about the one when you are sleeping and someone pokes you into wakefulness and says, "Did I wake you?" I can't [i]stand[/i] people who do that.[/color] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Posthumous Posted January 26, 2003 Share Posted January 26, 2003 [COLOR=green][SIZE=1][i]Or how about when you can't sleep, a younger sibling comes near you and keeps asking you, "Are you sleeping yet?" I hate that when my youngest cousin does that.[/i][/SIZE][/COLOR] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Juu Posted January 27, 2003 Share Posted January 27, 2003 [color=ff00cc] [size=1]~Are you sleeping?~ -Mom ~Are you asian?~ -Girl in class... ~People think we're related. Isn't that funny?~ -Celia ~How do you say 'Sayonara' in Japanese?~ -Boy in Japanese Class ~Which flavor do you like better, Coke or Pepsi?~ -Celia ~"O-Genki Desu Ka?" "Genki Desu." "so... how are you feeling?"~ -Person from Japanese Class ~(after running in the wrong bathroom* ...How come the toilets look different? o_o; ~ -Juu[/color] [/size] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Yu Yu Hakusho! Posted January 27, 2003 Share Posted January 27, 2003 I get the SAME exact ones like that Juu.....all the boys in my Exp. Lang. class go up to me and ask, "How do you say Konnichi Wa in Japanese Lauren?" I just look at them.....like this......o.O Someone asked me if Coke was from Korea once...or was it that other drink...can't remember. But it was one of the soft drinks we have here. And in trading Yu-Gi-Oh cards a while back.... "Hey, can I trade you that Blue Eyes White Dragon for my Blue Eyes White Dragon?" If you saw what was happening and was there to witness it, you'd be laughing your *** off...... It was the same exact card, same conditon...everything. I don't talk to her anymore though.....><; (she's kind of messed up) "Can I eat your lunch? I'm full." -Sam "Can I sign my name in Japanese?" -Michelle "Can you do my homework for me? I don't feel like doing it." -Lauren There are so many more, but I can't think of them right now. My [i]Favorite.....[/i] "What does Yu Yu Hakusho Ghost Files mean Lauren?" -Katie Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Blade Posted January 27, 2003 Share Posted January 27, 2003 [COLOR=orangered]If you want to read some really stupid things you have come to the right place!!!!![/COLOR] I have proof that that the human race is doomed because of stupidity, here are some actual label instructions on consumer goods. On a Sears hairdryer: Do not use while sleeping. (darn, and that's the only time I have to work on my hair). On a bag of Fritos: You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside. (the shoplifter special?) On a bar of Dial soap: "Directions: Use like regular soap." (and that would be how???....) On some Swanson frozen dinners: "Serving suggestion: Defrost." (but, it's "just" a suggestion). On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom): "Do not turn upside down." (well...duh, a bit late, huh)! On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding: "Product will be hot after heating." (...and you thought????...) On packaging for a Rowenta iron: "Do not iron clothes on body." (but wouldn't this save me more time?) On Boot's Children Cough Medicine:"Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication." (We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents if we could just get those 5-year-olds with head-colds off those forklifts.) On Nytol Sleep Aid: "Warning: May cause drowsiness." (and...I'm taking this because???....) On most brands of Christmas lights: "For indoor or outdoor use only." (as opposed to...what?) On a Japanese food processor: "Not to be used for the other use." (now, somebody out there, help me on this. I'm a bit curious.) On Sainsbury's peanuts: "Warning: contains nuts." (talk about a news flash!) On an American Airlines packet of nuts: "Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts." (Step 3: maybe, uh...fly Delta?) I don't blame the company. I blame the parents for this one: On a child's superman costume: "Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly." On a Swedish chainsaw: "Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands or genitals." (...was there a lot of this happening somewhere?) I mean how stupid can people get???? Regards Blade :naughty: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GinnyLyn Posted January 27, 2003 Share Posted January 27, 2003 [color=royal blue]Some questions I got while working over the holidays: *phone rings, Ginny answers* "Chili's ---, Gift Card Headquarters, this is Ginny, how can I help you?" Response 1: "Is this Chili's?" Response 2: "Do you sell gift cards?" Or when people come up to me in the ToGo station, BIG [SIZE=4]HUGE[/SIZE] To Go signs everywhere pointing at my station, and they ask: "Yeah, do you do your food to go?" OR (and just to show that customers aren't the only stupid question ones), I get to work in uniform...and a server asks if I'm working today. Makes me wanna say, "Nah, just thought I'd put on the latest in resturaunt fashion and spend my off time at my job." Makes me want to beat them over their empty heads with several NERF bats.[/color] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hybrid Posted January 27, 2003 Share Posted January 27, 2003 [color=darkblue]I've heard and read some dumb things before: "have you ever heard a question that was just so stupid that you had to repeat it" lol j/k I've seen some really stupid warnings before: On a box to a set of carving knifes: Warning, contains sharp knifes! (O_o as opposed to them being blunt, who would want blunt carving knifes) On the label to a milkshake: Contains milk. (well duh, thats why its called a MILKshake) Theres more but I can't remember them at the moment, I'll edit later [/color] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dan L Posted January 27, 2003 Share Posted January 27, 2003 [QUOTE][i]Originally posted by Hybrid [/i] [B][color=darblue]On the label to a milkshake: Contains milk. (well duh, thats why its called a MILKshake) [/color] [/B][/QUOTE] It's even worse when they label a packet of nuts: WARNING: CONTAINS NUTS!!.. .... (on looking, I realise someone else has already said it.. but my point still stands ;P) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mitch Posted January 27, 2003 Share Posted January 27, 2003 [color=red] Why do humans look to the sky? Why does the world answer back, sheltered, sheeped in cry?...:rolleyes: This thread is so pointless...: Dives away from it:[/color] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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