Writing Eternal Dream

[Juu]

[color=0099ff] [size=1][center]~*Eternal Dream*~[/center]

Take another step...
You have traveled great distances to come here.
Take another step...
The door in the wall is nothing but the path you must take.
Take another step...
Your doom is very near.
Take another step...
[center]~~~[/center]

Elijah felt something under his feet. He had reached the city limits, where the forest marked the boundaries of the Kingdom. Dark cedars and pines shadowed the grounds. Outside the forest, he would be far beyond the reach of the Astyrian soldiers. He had been running for nine days throughout the country, criss-crossing through busy streets. He could hear the sound of hooves not far from where he had been standing. It was exausting. They had been hunting him for miles. It was never his fault. He had committed no crime. Yet the cunning council would counter his words with ease, sending each of them straight back into his mouth. Elijah was defenseless in the new city. There was neither a soul or spirit there at the scene. The man had been dead for days. Possibly even weeks. Skipping past stones, and leaping through trees, Elijah inhaled deeply. Neither a breath nor heartbeat was heard. He was alone now, the soldiers had given up after more than a week's run.

He stopped to catch his breath. Pulling out a pouch from his belt, he drank from the canteen until the very last drop touched his lips. Just then, his head turned towards a small alter. Veils of gentle sunlight caressed the tips of brittle grass which lay before it. There was something enchanting about the alter, for it lay covered in mysterious, whirling vines as he had never seen before. He leaned over to touch it. A light breeze swept across his face, tickling the tiny hairs on his back, sending a chill in the atmostphere.

[i]"Isilier..."[/i]

Elijah's eyes widened. Echoes of a whisper trickled amongst the leaves.

[i]"Isilier..."[/i]

He heard the light, silver chimes of bells overhead. He didn't move. Too frightened to breathe, paralyzed with fear. The breeze passed, and his body loosened once again.

"This fresh air's driving me mad..." He murmured to himself.

Elijah made his way into a clearing. His jet black eyes seemed to linger about, forgetting the voice he had heard, and continuing his travels North. The traveler gazed into the vermillion sky, tainted with clouds. Just then, he saw something... something glimmer in the sunlight. He rushed over to check it. What he found there paralyzed him with fear.
[center]~~~[/center][/color] [/size]

[color=ff00cc] [size=1]-----
Bah. ><; That's the first part to my story... Some C&C would be appreciated. ^_^[/color] [/size]

[Red]

[b][color=003399]More.. more.. post more!

I think it's a great start. Very descriptive and to the point, although you left it on an edge. >.<

[size=1]More.... more...[/size][/b][/color]

[Boo]

Ooooo! Very nice.
I want to read on ^^
First time i ever read a continue story on OB i think :p

[Celia]

[color=0099FF] [size=1]Wonderful! It's a really clear poem... And post the second half!!![/color] [/size]

[Juu]

[color=ff00cc] [size=1]His hands trembled as he bent down to pick it up. Two pairs of silver bells lay on the ground, drenched with fresh blood. Elijah held it in his palms, studying it carefully. Eyeing the bells, observing carefully, drops of wet blood fell from the spheres, onto his palms. A lump in his throat left him breathless, as countless amounts of blood fell from the bells. A strange mark apon the silver seemed to fill his mind of queer mysteries of the forest. He shuddered as dropped them, suddenly feeling a surge of energy in his veins. In that instant, a blinding light appeared from the bells, surrounding him in a fury of white light. Elijah quickly shielded his eyes, blindly struggling to the closest tree behind them. He couldn't open his eyes. The light was too strong...

As he grew somewhat attatched to the light, he crawled towards the bells on his elbows, stuggling to make his way without opening his eyes. He cupped one hand over the bells, shielding his eyes with the other. The bells began to shake, and sent another spark to his palm. Elijah resisted. His hands numbed at the jolts. Finally, he took firm hold of the bells, and held them closely in his hand.

And then... the vines of the wall began to unravel, revealing hieroglypic patterns in the stone walls. They slowly parted from each other, pulling away into their own directions. The whispers grew louder. Trees began to sway wildly as the whispers grew louder. The ground shook ahead of him with great magnitude. Elijah struggled to keep his balance. His eyes widened. The land seemed to sink into a ditch, less than five feet ahead of him. Two sculptures of frog-like creatures rose from the ground, covered with dirt and debris of where they rose.

Elijah stepped back.

"This is a dream." He told himself. "This is a dream..."

The mouths of the creature-sculptures slowly opened, a slight crevice in their tounges. Engraved into their tounges was the same character marked on the surface of the bells. Trusting his reflexes, he placed each of the bells on their tounges. Their mouths snapped closed, carrying each of the bells inside. They sank back into the ground, as a loud moan rumbled throughout the forest. He fell backwards, and crawled away from the wall, full of fear. The ground silenced, and the markings on the wall began to glow. Just then, his hands were drawn outsretched towards the wall. As if in a trance, he stepped towards the wall, pressing his hands against two triangles which marked the gates. He pulled his hands back, and saw the letter on the bells printed on his skin with blood. The door began to hover slightly off the ground, blinding him with white light, winds pulling him closer to the gate.

[i]"Isilier..."[/i][/color] [/size]

[Boo]

[QUOTE][i]Originally posted by Celia [/i]
[B][color=0099FF] [size=1]It's a really clear poem...[/color] [/size] [/B][/QUOTE]

err.... I think its a story with more than 2 halfs ;)


AW: EXITING! :p
I cant wait for the nxt part!