Tell me the truth.

[Sara]

[SIZE=1]If your friend asked you to lie to them, would you do it?

Obviously, some answers will vary according to the seriousness of the situation. I'm not going to give any examples; make up your own.

I just want to see what you will take this.[/SIZE]

[Sui Generis]

Depends. I mean I'm totally non-confrantational in real life.

I mean I know it would be hard for me to not lie, but I'd try....

I don't like lieing...

Now if it was to someone else to get them out of trouble, then I'd have no problem with it ;)

[Posthumous]

[b][sarcastic]*gasp* I would never![/sarcastic]

Then again, if they did ask me to lie to them or someone else I would.If it were a bully pickin on my best friend [strike]I would beat the shitake mushrooms out of him[/strike] I'd tell him that he's not there and then [strike]Beat the crap out of him[/strike] tell him to stop.

Other situations too.[/b]

[Semjaza]

Why would they even ask me to do that?

I've found that generally people (friends, whatever) want me to think they are something they are not. Such as girls that think they are fat when they really aren't whatsoever. They still want everyone to agree.

Sure, I've acted like I liked things I really don't for my friends' sakes (if they asked, I'd tell them the truth though heh)... But I don't really recall a situation where they right out asked me to lie to them.

Kind of weird I think.

[Yu Law]

I would if I had to but I don't like to.Maybe if it was to save the friendship.

but it depends...

[Justin]

I generally try to be as honest as possible. So, unless it was [i]really[/i] as serious situation where a lie was gravely important, I would probably tell the truth.

-Justin

[Celia]

[color=0099FF] [size=1]Depends on the situation. If I had to lie as in a way of helping somebody, then I would do it; but not my very best friend though. [/color] [/size]

[Guest Anakin Solo]

If they wanted me to lie to them...sure why not. If they didn't want me too....I would probably still lie to them, depending on the situation. And if I were asked to lie for them in a situation, I would do it in heartbeat.

[Heaven's Cloud]

[QUOTE][i]Originally posted by Sara [/i]
[B][SIZE=1]If your friend asked you to lie to them, would you do it?

Obviously, some answers will vary according to the seriousness of the situation. I'm not going to give any examples; make up your own.

I just want to see what you will take this.[/SIZE] [/B][/QUOTE]

[color=indigo]I guess it depends on what I could gain from the lie...sometimes I'll just tell my friend I'll lie for them and then I won't just because I get off on being mean and spitful.[/color]

[PiroMunkie]

[QUOTE][i]Originally posted by Sara[/i]
[B][SIZE=1]If your friend asked you to lie to them, would you do it?[/SIZE] [/B][/QUOTE][color=indigo][size=1]No.

Of course, I could be lying. ;)[/color][/size]

[Delian]

It all depends on the situation and who i'd be lying to. If it was a really close friend and the lie wouldn't effect me in any way, then yes I would. Otherwise, I'd tell the truth or just stay out of it...

Truth comes out eventually.

[GinnyLyn]

Mmmm, hypothetical questions, Sar? :)

In theory, I wouldn't. In theory, I know others wouldn't do it for me if I asked.

But then, I've never been in the situation, really. I could form a better opinion if I did.

There's been a few times when they asked me to lie to them was unspoken, but clearly there. And in tense, emotional times, it depends on whether the lie would carry them on a little further through the time...or break them completely.

But them knowing it's a lie...it's different than them [i]not[/i] knowing it's a lie. I mean, why ask someone to lie to you in the first place if you know it's a lie. Whether you try to play like the lie is the truth, albeit for a short time, the truth, as mentioned, is still out there. And knowing that what you are holding onto at the moment [i]isn't[/i] the truth--it just messes with it completely. There's no comfort in that.

Here's to another post that made sense. :drunk:

[Sara]

:shifty:

[size=1]*quietly kills Piro*

...What?!

Anyway. ^_~

I'm afraid that if I toss out a couple examples, people are just going to start saying things like: [QUOTE]1. No. 2. yes. 3. yes.[/QUOTE] Oh, well.

Okay, three varying levels of seriousness: Do you lie or not?

1. [b]Your best friend has discovered that you have never seen (or didn't like) his/her favorite movie. After a playful fight, he or she agrees to drop the subject if you just say you like it.[/b].

It's all in fun, no big moral dilemma. Do you end the fight or let them tackle you again?

2. [b]Your date [or friend] shows you her dress for the school dance. She likes it, although she can tell you don't. She asks you to tell her you like it.[/b]

You both know you'd be lying. Does it really matter?

3. [b]Your best friend has been quiet all day, and won't tell you what's wrong. Later that night, she tells you that her mother has been diagnosed with cancer. She wants to hear you say everything will be alright.[/b]

What do you tell her? "It's okay, everything is going to be okay," or "I'm sorry, you know I can't do that. I'm here for you, though, alright?"

You're not really gaining anything in any of these situations, and you're not trying to get anyone in or out of trouble. [/size]

[KrypToniK]

I guess I could if they really wanted me to, but I don't see why they would want me to lie to them.

I guess it really depends on the situation.

[PiroMunkie]

[QUOTE][i]Originally posted by Sara[/i]
[B]:shifty:

[size=1]*quietly kills Piro*

...What?![/size][/b][/quote][color=indigo][size=1]Meheh. Phase two complete! ^^


1. [b]Your best friend has discovered that you have never seen (or didn't like) his/her favorite movie. After a playful fight, he or she agrees to drop the subject if you just say you like it.[/b].

Fight 'til the death! :p Of course, if my friend was a girl, I would not fight at all. I would just [i]really[/i] sarcastically tell them that I "like" it. <-- with air quotes and everything! All for one low price of $195.99 :) (not sold in stores, and I am sorry no COD's)

2. [b]Your date [or friend] shows you her dress for the school dance. She likes it, although she can tell you don't. She asks you to tell her you like it.[/b]

Pfft, no. The dress does not make the person. If her feelings are hurt by my honesty, then I can speak even more honestly and tell her just because I do not like the dress does not mean that I think any less of her for wearing, or wanting to wear, it.

3. [b]Your best friend has been quiet all day, and won't tell you what's wrong. Later that night, she tells you that her mother has been diagnosed with cancer. She wants to hear you say everything will be alright.[/b]

At first, yes, I would tell them that. That is what they need to hear at that point in time. The person would be emotionally unstable. Once they have calmed down, you can speak of things more seriously and with more solid truth to them.

By solid truth, I mean the [b]hard[/b] truth. At first I could say something along the lines of "Everything will be all right; she will go to a better place.". This would be a 'soft' truth. Everything will be all right [i]eventually[/i]. "Eventually" being once she gets over the fact that her mom has cancer and can move on with life. By that time, she should have accepted the hard truth that her mom [i]is[/i] going to die; but it helps to make sure she knows that, and let her know that you care enough to talk to her about it.[/color][/size]

[Lady Asphyxia]

[color=darkred][size=1][b]1. Your best friend has discovered that you have never seen (or didn't like) his/her favorite movie. After a playful fight, he or she agrees to drop the subject if you just say you like it..[/b]

Fight. First of all, because I've been in this situation, and it's more fun just to fight than pretend I like it. Besides, it gives us something to do. What? Are we supposed to spend our time productively, or something?

[b]2. Your date [or friend] shows you her dress for the school dance. She likes it, although she can tell you don't. She asks you to tell her you like it.[/b]

Yes. Mainly because a fair few of my friends have confidence problems, and I'd rather that they [i]didn't[/i] get all self-conscious. Besides, it's just a dress. Does it [i]matter[/i] whether or not I say I like it?

[b]3. Your best friend has been quiet all day, and won't tell you what's wrong. Later that night, she tells you that her mother has been diagnosed with cancer. She wants to hear you say everything will be alright.[/b]

Whoa...now this brings back memories. First of all, I'd probably give her a huge hug and hold her for a while, just to show my support. Then I'd tell her it'll be all right. How do you know it won't be? Her mother could have had cancer diagnosed early on, and she could be saved. Later, I'd ask and try to gather what sort of cancer, and how far adnvanced. I'd keep telling her everything will be all right all the way through, mainly because, even if her Mum does die, she herself will come out all right.[/color][/size]

[Lady Macaiodh]

[color=darkblue]I really don't see the point in [i]any[/i] scenario, because if they ask you to lie, they know you're lying. What's the point of that? You can tell the truth in a way that won't hurt anyone's feelings.

Once, I had to tell one of my best friends that her husband had tried to kiss me & get me to have sex with him. I guess she could tell what I was about to say from how I was leading up to it, because she started acting like she didn't want to hear it. But I said it anyway. The next day, she said she had wanted me to lie to her at the time, but looking back on it she was really glad I didn't.

In those serious situations, it depends on the circumstance. For the cancer thing, I'd just say "I don't know. I hope so. But God is watching over her" or something comforting along those lines.[/color]

[Guest Hikaru Ichijyo]

Well I never have been one to condone lying...I just don't think it's right to decieve a person even when they ask you too. It's not really a morale issue but a code of honor for me.

As for the situations:

1.)I'm sorry but I'm brutefully honest when a movie sucks. I wouldn't drop the subject and would most likely try to point out all the flaws within the movie to prove my points. Sorry but that's human nature for you. ^_^;

2.)Once again honesty would be the best policy if a friend of mine was wearing a dress I didn't like or let's say it made them look rather foolish. I'd definitely tell them I don't like that, I'd expect them to do the same for me since no-one wants to look like a fool.

3.)In that last situation comforting a person isn't really considered a lie even when it revolves around cancer. So I'd definitely comfort them and give them a word of advice to keep there hopes up I'd hate to see any of my friends go through a depression like that.

[Delian]

Example 1
I'd tell her no and keep on play fighting until we both give up...she'll get over it

Example 2
If the outfit looks bad, I definitely tell her it looks bad...and I'd go with her to return it and choose something better. If she was a good friend she'd understand that I wouldn't want her to embarass herself at the dance.

Example 3
I'd tell her that everything will be alright no matter what happens. I'd let her know that she'll be in my prayers and that i'll be there for her...or something like that.

[ChibiV]

[QUOTE][i]Originally posted by Sara [/i]
[B][SIZE=1]If your friend asked you to lie to them, would you do it?

Obviously, some answers will vary according to the seriousness of the situation. I'm not going to give any examples; make up your own.

I just want to see what you will take this.[/SIZE] [/B][/QUOTE]

Yes. Definitely, if that lie doesn't harm my friend or other. My friend asked my to lie to her parent that she's going to my house, but the truth is she's going out with her boyfriend. :D That's not a bad lie, and something that I can do within my ability to help my friend. :D

[Mnemolth]

Interesting...

I agree with Lady M. I don't think there is really any point in lying to the person that asked you to lie to them for their sake. It doesn't seem to make any sense to me.

Here's my own little example. Kinda different but around the same theme. [i]This example is assuming I'm a girl[/i], but boys can just as easily switch positions with a few small modifications.

Imagine your best friend is getting married, and on the eve of the wedding you find out that the groom has had an affair with another woman during their time together, although this was a while back and it is all over now, but your best friend did not know about any of this.

Now, further imagine your friend is the kind of person who does NOT want to know these things and reacts VERY badly when these things are revealed. She wants her wedding to go flawlessly and you KNOW that if you tell her, it would break her heart, she would be forced to cancel the wedding, and in all likelihood never speak to you again. Although you were only a messenger, you know that you will be the bearer of such horrible news that you will forever be marked by it, and your relationship with your best friend cannot survive, or if it does, it can never be the same.

On the other hand, if she were to find this out after getting hitched, she may be angry with you for a while, but she would know why you did what you did and its highly likely you guys can patch things up.

Finally imagine that you know the groom well. That it was a bad mistake, and that he is ashamed of it, and he pleas to you to not tell your best friend, and he promises nothing like that will ever happen again. AND YOU BELIEVE HIM.

What would you do? Tell your best friend and probably lose the closest relationship in your life? Or realise that in this case, the truth will do more damage than a lie?

The premise of this example is whether to tell the truth when you have nothing to gain and everything to lose, or to tell a lie where you have everything to gain and nothing to lose.

[vegeta rocker]

My answer for all the scenarios would be i wouldn't lie. They will obviously find out the truth inthe end and what is the point in prolonging the inevitable? It won't make it go away will it? No, and they might as well hear it from a friend and have a better capacity to get over it. I can already see myself freaking out the second i lie and it back fires......

CAUGHT! I'M CAUGHT IN MY OWN WEB OF LIES!

[Mitch]

[color=red] Placing all of the millions of scenarios you could give me, I believe there's two places they could go. There's those situations that are actually [i]critical[/i] to a relationship and/or a friendship. And then there's those that don't even matter one bit to how something is going.

So basically, it depends on how difficult the situation it is. If your friend says they are going to go and kill themselves or something along the lines somewhere in the finality, you obviously don't want them to kill themselves. So you would tell them everything is going to be happy and wonderful forever and ever. That there is of course a lie, but on the other side, it is a compassionate lie somewhat.

But more along what the lines of what Sara is asking. Would you lie if a friend [i]asked[/i] you to. That could be kind of contradicting and spiralling right there. I could have been lieing from the very beginning and then, supposing they ask you to lie--that's just a whole tangle of lies and other things.

You see, people lie sometimes just for the sake. They don't mean it, but then again, then they don't have to argue. Basically, it depends on how riled and able to fight over someone else's ideals someone is. If it's a small thing that doesn't matter in the long run--such as liking a movie for an example--then I would be abriged to lie that I liked it just to possibly get the friend off of my case. And then again, it also depends on how high I hold that friend. If they're my best friend in the world, I would certainly not lie. But if I'm abriged not to care of what that person thinks of me, I will lie.

But now, taking this higher. Say they ask you to lie and say you're something you're not and build a reputation as such. That there is something that changes other's opinions of you. That is a much bigger thing than just saying you didn't like a movie. That's being asked to [i]live a lie[/i]. That is a completely different thing in intensity all together then just lying about the movie.

There's many different other ways and scenarios you can rank up to what Sara's asked, but they all land in one of two places. Either it's something that doesn't matter to the person who is being asked to lie, or it is. Almost everything, if not all, will follow into one of those two places.[/color]

[Dan L]

[QUOTE][i]Originally posted by Sara [/i]
[B][size=1]1. Your best friend has discovered that you have never seen (or didn't like) his/her favorite movie. After a playful fight, he or she agrees to drop the subject if you just say you like it..

It's all in fun, no big moral dilemma. Do you end the fight or let them tackle you again?[/size] [/B][/QUOTE]

I wouldn'y end it.. not on moral grounds, cos like you said it's all in fun, but out of determination to get them to say they [i]didn't[/i] like it, or drop the subject ;)

[QUOTE][i]Originally posted by Sara [/i]
[B][size=1]2. Your date [or friend] shows you her dress for the school dance. She likes it, although she can tell you don't. She asks you to tell her you like it.

You both know you'd be lying. Does it really matter? [/size] [/B][/QUOTE]

Yes. It matters, [i]because[/i] you both know you'd be lying if you said you liked it. It's better to get the truth out than let it eat at both of you when you know what you said was a lie.

[QUOTE][i]Originally posted by Sara [/i]
[B][size=1]3. Your best friend has been quiet all day, and won't tell you what's wrong. Later that night, she tells you that her mother has been diagnosed with cancer. She wants to hear you say everything will be alright.

What do you tell her? "It's okay, everything is going to be okay," or "I'm sorry, you know I can't do that. I'm here for you, though, alright?"

You're not really gaining anything in any of these situations, and you're not trying to get anyone in or out of trouble. [/size] [/B][/QUOTE]

I don't see how it's lying.. I would say everything will be OK.. but I wouldn't really see it as a lie.. cos even if their mother dies of cancer, there's always [i]something[/i] to be happy about.. and I really believe that death isn't the end, so to be perfectly honest I don't see "everything will be OK" as a lie at all.. I mean, I know damn well that it won't be OK in the short term, and that their mother may die, and I would say that too, but in the long term everything would be OK.

(And I know people who have experience in this particular matter.. so just trust me on that.. if everything is said that is needed to be said, and everything is done that is needed to be done, before they die, it's not as painful as if you spend the time worrying about it. In other words, if you have a positive attitude, everything does end up OK)

[Cora Jane 2]

[font=arial][size=1] I guess it truly depends on which friend I was talking to, the topic, and my mood. If I felt like being really sarcastic... well I probably would lie... but I would have a really really sarcastic tone, (especially about the first and second dilema). The third one is alot more difficult... this brings up memories from the past. Ok. One of the girl's at school, her mother died of cancer last year... my grandmother has cancer... a close friend of the family died from cancer... so as you can tell this one hits me hard. Anywho. I would say "everything's gonna be alright" then once they are over the shock and have come to terms with the reality of who ever it is that has the cancer... I would sit and talk them through what's going on, and always make myself available if they need to talk. But for the first two... I would probably lie... 'hey, if they shut up... and stop moaning and groaning about it... it works.. right?' lol.... [/font][/size]