Jealous

[ChibiV]

What do you think of jealousy? For example, if you loved someone, and you're jealous when that person is with someone else. Is that love or a sign of untrustworthy? Personally, I think if you loved someone, you must trust that person. You shouldn't be jealous. Also, someone told me that, if that person doesn't jealous, that mean he/she doesn't love you. Is that true?

[Kei]

[color=royalblue]Oo Weird wording, but I think I get at what you're asking.

To me, jealousy is both a good and a bad thing. To one extent, it can be seen as a sign that you truly like/love someone, and would do anything for them, or to get with them. Therein lies the bad part. It can also be considered extremely selfish. I myself have been bitten by the Green-Eyed Monster a couple of times. It's a very weird and confusing emotion.

As for your question, I don't believe that if a person doesn't get envious of the fact that the person they like is with someone else, that doesn't mean they don't love them. Love can go beyond sinking down to the lower levels to try and get them back. As the saying says, "If you truly love someone, let them go." Of course, if the person is two-timimg you, you have every right to do as you will.[/color]

[Corey]

I'd have to say that jealousy can be a very bad thing. Jealousy can spawn contemp as well as hatred for another. I try to live a jelous-less life but it is a very hard task to complete. I see people and I"m jelous of the things they have or do often. I hate admitting that seeing as I try to do away with such trivial problems... But I can't. Jelousy is something that is built into the very genetic coding of our minds. Sadly, it's hard for one to completely do away with emotions.

If only we were like the enlightened Vulcans...

[vegeta rocker]

ahhhhh live long and prosper huh? sounds like a interesting emotionless life.....
but since there are emotions and jealousy is one life is complicated.
Jealousy is never a good emotion, but everyone goes through it.
Is it a bad thing? Well like has been said it spawns other emotions. It can make you kill or injure.

[Rhys Mayiessen]

[color=skyblue]I agree with DarkOrderKnight about that jealousy can bring up hatred towards others because well I have experienced it first hand. The guy I like always hangs around with girls...I mean almost all of his friends are girls. Everytime I see him with another girl I'm insanely jealous. I tried to stop being jealous by telling myself that there is nothing between him and the other girls he's with but it just doesn't work.

So jealous is a bad thing especially when you hear that one of the girls he hangs out with likes him and then there is a possiblity of them getting together. Someday I think my jealousy will drive me mad. But I am learning to control it[/color]

[Juu]

[color=ff00cc] [size=1]Oooh boy... :shifty:
It's been a while since the event occured, but I'm still getting fwapped with this really, really huge block of jealousy. >>;

I wouldn't say it makes someone feel hatred towards the person they're jealous of, but some sort of uneasy feeling... You know, whenever you talk to them, you just don't feel exactly 100% relaxed.

I'm jealous of lots of people. Some in good ways, and some in... not so...great ways. @.@;

Good ways like... Tori and Jenna! I'm sooo jealous of you guys. --[/color] [/size]

[RicoTranzrig]

[COLOR=darkblue]Well, I'm thinking that jealousy is a sign that you still need to know the person more before you really love the person, probably you're still in the infatuation stage. It really depends on what your definitions of love are. I used to be jealous and started suspecting things with my 'special friend'. And now, I feel that I can trust the person more simple because I know more about her to feel secure; hopefully to eventually ignore all the negative suspictions and concentrate on giving her my love/support.[/COLOR]

[Yu Law]

I hate jealousy...it tends to eat away at you even when you try not to think about it.It hurts ten times more than it helps.

all in all I'd say its bad...however,it does have an odd way of showing you were you stand with your girlfriend...-_-

Watching her just freak out and demand that you stop talking to any kind of girls just because your going out with her really shows you how much she trusts you -_-

[Charles]

Jealousy is a natural human emotion that stems from passion--not reason. So, under some circumstances, it can betray our better judgement.

When a couple breaks up, it's not necessarily because the partners no longer share love for one another. It might be due to incompatibility issues. They might not share the same interests, or want the same things out of life. They might have married young and realized later, that they don't know each other as well as they thought they did. Other times, people simply grow apart and lose the bond that kept them together..

In situations like these, I can understand if jealousy arises when one partner discovers that the other has found happiness with someone else. They couldn't provide the happiness their partner needed, and now someone else is--with a person they still love.

Jealousy doesn't even need to operate on such a level. That's just one example. But, it occurs because feelings of love are still there. In that situation, there's nothing wrong with it.

Unfortunately jealousy is often a result of insecurity. In [i]that[/i] kind of situation it's dead wrong. Obviously, it can lead to bitterness and abuse. Having said that, it's safe to add that some people just can't feel comfortable in a relationship and are constantly suspecting their partner of infidelity--which only serves to push people apart from one another. Or, it can lead to dangerous outcomes, like violent behavior.

So, while you're in a relationship, you shouldn't be jealous. You should be comfortable and trusting. A relationship without trust isn't a healthy relationship at all. After certain break-ups, it's only natrual to feel jealous. Those feelings go away though once one accepts that their partner is better off.

[Guest Cute_eyes]

i also agree with darkordernight
jealousy always brings hatred
but don't let it ruin ur life is it
it's like this boy hates me just cause i skateboard and i do better at it
but some people don't get it
wot is rong they can't stop bein mad and start to pick on me
it's like they hate me now and they were my best friends
is it rong if ur better at somethin then someone else

[Biida]

[color=skyblue] Ah, yes. Jealousy, the green-eyed monster. *sighs and looks in the mirror, beginning to think her eyes are getting greener now every day* I'm bitten by the evil thing a lot, and usually just for stupid reasons... All in all, insecurities suck. O o;

It doesn't necessarily always bring hatred, though. I prefer Juu's description of how it makes you uncomfy around someone.

[size=1]And I'm tired, slightly hyper, and in need of a coffee. So, just ignore me for now. ^ ^; [/size][/color]

[Duo Maxwell]

I'm pretty indifferent when it comes to people I like being with someone else. Sure I get annoyed but really I can't change a thing by hating the other person so why bother getting jealous.

I usued to get jealous easily but I've become very indifferent since I began going to my school.

[JCBaggee]

[font=arial][color=red]I don't know if my problem is that I'm jealous. I think I'm just reeaally depressed.

--Chris[/color][/font]

[ChibiV]

This is kind of hard. How do you know when you're overly jealous of someone?

[JCBaggee]

[color=red][font=arial]Well, if you want something of theres so badly that it jeopardizes a friendship or whatever with them, you're probably pretty jealous. Basically, you hate them for material possessions/friends/etc.

--Chris[/color][/font]

[ChibiV]

[QUOTE][i]Originally posted by JCBaggee [/i]
[B][color=red][font=arial]Well, if you want something of theres so badly that it jeopardizes a friendship or whatever with them, you're probably pretty jealous. Basically, you hate them for material possessions/friends/etc.

--Chris[/color][/font] [/B][/QUOTE]

After reading your post, I just remember something. I know some people mistaken love and possession. If you love someone, that doesn't mean you own or possess them. When a person get jealous, could it be that he/she thinks that he/she possesses or owns the other?

[Lady Macaiodh]

[color=darkblue]I think jealousy, when it arises, is not something that can really be helped, because it's a feeling, not a decision. Rather, being not jealous is a decision. It's a natural emotion to have & not wrong, but it's how you decide to handle it that makes the difference.

I'm not usually the jealous type with whoever I'm dating. But I've had incidents where the guy got mad or offended because I [i]wasn't[/i] jealous. They took it as a sign that I didn't care, & even flirted with other girls to try to get a rise out of me. So I had to sort of pretend to give them peace of mind!

I also think that if your partner has been unfaithful, you have the right to be more jealous than usual (but that's more of a trust issue).[/color]

[Magnum Apex]

[QUOTE][i]Originally posted by Lady Macaiodh [/i]
[B][color=darkblue]I'm not usually the jealous type with whoever I'm dating. But I've had incidents where the guy got mad or offended because I [i]wasn't[/i] jealous. They took it as a sign that I didn't care, & even flirted with other girls to try to get a rise out of me. So I had to sort of pretend to give them peace of mind! [/color] [/B][/QUOTE]

[font=trebuchet ms][color=darkblue]I've been guilty of that. There have been times when I'd like my other half to show at least a bit of jealousy. I found out later that she is, in fact, jealous. I'm a flirt, though a decent one, I can make girl friends easily. She never told me it bothered her, until we got into the topic without planning to. You know what, though? I think it's cute, because when I'm jealous, or when she's jealous, we never try to make the other person feel bad for our own irrational emotions. In other words, even if one of us is jealous, we'll never ask the other person to stop doing what makes us feel that way, because deep down we trust each other, and we know it'd be wrong for us to act on an irrational feeling. Also, I believe the longer we remain together, the easier it will be to overcome jealousy.

Oh well...

Jealousy is too complicated a subject, and it is neither right nor wrong, but it balances out in these two depending on the people involved. In my case, jealousy isn't such a bad thing, since no hatred comes off it, and we never try to blame anyone other than ourselves for the way we feel. However, I've encountered many situations where jealousy leads to frustration, and broken hearts.

A friend of mine has a very jealous, untrustworthy boyfriend. He honestly doesn't want her to have any friends (or any guy friends), since he believes with him in the picture should be enough. She doesn't want her to be my friend, so she lies to him when she and I talk. Then, she blames herself for lying to him, when she's actually doing nothing wrong since the boyfriend's the one who gets pissed off whenever she interacts with other people. I am sure he believes he is right in blaming her for it.

The guy makes me sick. He makes her feel bad for her own insecurities, and that's when jealousy can be detrimental to a relationship, and to the individual's emotions.

Again, it depends on the people involved. Also, do not confuse jealousy with envy. Envy is the result of wanting something others' have, especially when it causes the envious person to feel resentful. Envy IS always bad, unless it fuels your desire to obtain something, honorably.[/color][/font]

[Guest Cute_eyes]

i agree
u shouldn't be jealous most of the time
be happy for wot u have
there are different kinds of people
and here's today's sayin
HE WHO ANGERS YOU CONQUERS YOU

[Yu Law]

I hate jealousy....even if you love someone so much that you would die for them there is always gonna be that litte thing in the back of your head driving you crazy and leading you to believe that your soulmate...your love...your heart is doing something wrong because she or he just can't be so perfect without having one flaw, and the only flaw that you mind can even imagine them having is lust...I say jealousy can be a sign of true love or a sign of true fear...hey but thats just me ranting

[Vegitto4]

[QUOTE][i]Originally posted by ChibiV [/i]
[B]What do you think of jealousy? For example, if you loved someone, and you're jealous when that person is with someone else. Is that love or a sign of untrustworthy? Personally, I think if you loved someone, you must trust that person. You shouldn't be jealous. Also, someone told me that, if that person doesn't jealous, that mean he/she doesn't love you. Is that true? [/B][/QUOTE]

**reads a couple times to make sure he knows what your asking**

Well, from what i gather, your asking if jealousy is a good thing.

See i could either tell a story about last summer, which a bunch of you already know about, or give u my views. Meh


View: being a jealous person, it works out this way. I dont see being jealous as a bad thing, necessarily. I think that in order to be human, you need to have a certain level of jealousy. It shows that you care for soemthing or someone. Now, if that level is so great that you try to control the other person, then it becomes a problem. It all varies within the situation. Now, if you had a specific situation, which i havent' looked for yet,( i know i'm posting late) I could help out more.

[Ravenstorture]

i know it's hard not to be jealous, i took a while to get rid of it
but here is the deal with Harlequin and I: he loves me, and I love him. I want him to be happy, at whatever cost, and he wants me to be happy at whatever cost also. If it makes him happy, I'm all for it. If him sleeping with millions of teenybopping sluttish enemies of mine makes him happy, then that's fine with me. As long as it makes him happy. Same with me. If me slaughtering my parents and going to a thai jail makes me happy, then that's exactly what he wants me to do. If you are in love as much as we are, it doesn't matter if the other is pashing off a donkey or trying to drill for oil in their cat. It is unconditional - they will love you no matter who they are standing with, and you will love them no matter who you are sleeping with.

If you are in love to this extent, however, you tend to find that you don't need to put the "free relationship" theory into practice. It all depends on the type or strength or even definition of love. You don't fall out of love with someone that easily, especially if your partner loves you so much that they freely let you do whatever the hell you want. If harlequin would be eternally, infinately happy if I was dead, then I would kill myself. I am very grateful that this is not the case, however.

[Queen Asuka]

[color=hotpink][size=1]Whenever I feel jealous, it always stems from my own self-image. I get jealous because I feel inadequate, like I'm not good enough. And so if I'm jealous of you, it usually means that I think you are better than me. Don't ask me why I have such low self-esteem, it just sort of happens when you see all these pretty and popular people and you know how very unattractive you are.

In a relationship, I tend to be SUPER jealous. Why? Because I'M NOT GOOD ENOUGH! I don't like for other girls to come in and mess with Ryan *thinks about last night* because then I feel threatened, even though I trust Ryan would never leave me. Does that make sense.

Friday is one year for me and Ryan! WHOOHOO![/color][/size]

[treton_noir]

[QUOTE][i]Originally posted by Queen Asuka [/i]
[B][color=hotpink][size=1]Whenever I feel jealous, it always stems from my own self-image. I get jealous because I feel inadequate, like I'm not good enough. And so if I'm jealous of you, it usually means that I think you are better than me. Don't ask me why I have such low self-esteem, it just sort of happens when you see all these pretty and popular people and you know how very unattractive you are.

In a relationship, I tend to be SUPER jealous. Why? Because I'M NOT GOOD ENOUGH! I don't like for other girls to come in and mess with Ryan *thinks about last night* because then I feel threatened, even though I trust Ryan would never leave me. Does that make sense.[/color][/size] [/B][/QUOTE]

please ignore this part of Tori's post. she is delusional. she sometimes becomes over stressed and begins to think crazy things. i, then, proceed to convince her otherwise.

i, on the other hand, i think, am more jealous than she is in the relationship area. i wont tell her (even though she will probably see it now, so i guess that means im telling her. hmm...), but it really upsets me for her to talk with other guys. i HATE feeling like i have to share her. its not that i dont want her to have guy friends. i think im just greedy and want her to myself.

YAY for the yearness!

[Guest Gunslinger]

I agrea with Lady. You cant help jealousy. Its probably something everyone feels at some point. The thing that determines if its okay or hurtful is how you deal with it.

I dont beleive if you are jealous that you think of someone as a possession or something, I think it is a sign that you do really care about her. And anyway, if you love someone and want to be with them, you dont want them to be with anyone else, right?

Im not going to lie. I get jealous every single time my g/f talks or looks at another guy. I dont burn with rage, but yes I am jealous. I dont tell her she cant see anyone or talk to anyone because im jealous. That is where she becomes a possession. Its not that I dont trust her either. I do. Its just that, you care about them so much, your scared to death of loosing them to someone. Even if you do trust them, you still always think about that worst case scenario, its just natural. You just have to realize, that your partner will talk to other people. It doesnt mean she doesnt care about you are that they are interested in them. But for men at least, thats something that is very hard to understand.