Please, give me some advices

[ChibiV]

[SIZE=1]I have this trouble quite awhile already. My problem is that I have difficulty with expressing my feeling and telling the truth. (nothing harm though, it's not that I want to lie, I just don't want to hurt others feeling) How do I overcome my fear/struggle to be more open and speak of my mind. I always keep everything to myself, believe me, it's not a good feeling. Each time I lied, I feel really bad and guilty. My guilt and conscience is killing me. Can someone tell me how I can express my feeling and stop feelling guilty?[/SIZE]

[Guest cloricus]

There are many ways, writing, talking to other people just to get the point where you feel you can do it right and drawing. There are many other ways, you just have to find one that suits you.

-eps-

[Kei]

[color=royalblue]Well, what I would do is try writing out what I'm feeling. Just try to find a medium to think about. If your conscience is bothering you, calm yourself and then go tell the person the truth. You'll have to accept the consequences, whatever they may be, if that's the case. With being open, just come out and say what you feel like saying. Some people may accept it and some won't. That's all a part of opinions. I, myself, am going through something like what you are. *pokes Weh and Solo* Just say what you want. If whoever you're with doesn't like it, so what? That's on them.[/color]

[stardust]

basically, all you need to remember is that by telling them the truth, you're doing them a favor! I've been there so many times, and hearing a hard truth is better then a nice lie anyday. Trust me, I always wish people would tell me the truth even if it huirts,cuz they'll get over it,trust me...

[LostProphet]

hmmm....This forum has always helped me get along, at least since I joined.....try putting it in a poem or song, some type of media like that and posting it in the P/F/L Forum...

[ChibiV]

I wrote some poems in the P/F/L forum. It's very easy for me to write, the strange thing is, all of my writing based on other's feeling, not mine. Someone told me their story, and I put it a poem. It is very hard for me to open my mouth and speak. :(

[Avaris]

think alot about what you're saying, before you say it. I know I say a lot of stupid things that can sometimes be hurtful but usually my friends just laugh it off. Lying never ends up good, so try as hard as you can to tell the truth. i had this friend once who told everyone she was pregnant, pretty much just to get attention, and everyone hated her for ages but they got over it eventually. The thign is that you have to bond with people and the closer you get to someone the easier it is to talk to them. practice makes perfect.

[Semjaza]

I'd guess the simplest thing is to just tell the truth. I try to most of the time, because really... if you lie once, you're going to have to do it again countless times. You can very rarely just lie about one thing and never have to again. It's always a ball of lies.

I can't say I ever feel guilty for lying, because I don't have much of a conscience. However, life is just a lot easier if you are honest from the start in general.

You don't have to deal with it later, and while people might not appreciate your honesty at first, they generally come around. At the very least, you at least have some respect. I am not very supportive of people I know aren't being upfront with me. I don't even care if they hate me. I'd rather it was just out there and they were being honest. They'd get my respect at the least.

Of course all that totally depends on the situation. There are times when you simply cannot tell the truth or must gloss over something at least. It's a complex thing.

[Lady Asphyxia]

[size=1]Practice not lying. Often people do things when the lie -- fiddle with their fingers or something. If you realise you're lying, stop. If you don't realise until after you've lied, then backtrack and start again.

Obviously, there's a reason for lying. What situations do you lie in? Is it because you don't think the truth is enough and won't emphasise your point enough so other people can see why you're upset [or something]? Or is it just to protect people in general?

Honestly, I suggest, if it's the latter reason, to stop. People can protect themselves, and some things [i]need[/i] to be said.

On the other hand, you have to remember that sometimes holding the truth back can be better for all involved. You just have to use your judgement.[/size]

[T man]

I say just say whats on your mind and think is it better to keep it to your self and have it eat at you or is it better to tell some one. Of course telling lies isn't so hard for me because I have not felt guilt for A while.

[Transtic Nerve]

Here's some advice: Advice is a word that is singular and plural, so no need to add an "s" to it.

Anyway, the way you feel is not something you can just overcome. Be glad you feel that way cause then people don't think of you as bad cause you don't say bad things. If I were you, I'd stay the way you are. No need changing something that isn't bad. I mean really... would you want to tell someone they are a fat a$s and ruin their day or just say they look good and make them feel better about themselves?

[Epsilon]

Say what you feel. People won't get mad at you, plus it'd be easyer to live your life. I write poems, books, and draw pictures to show how I feel. If you really feel the way you do then show it. he best way to get your message arcoss is to write or to talk about it. Hope this helps you.

[Baron Samedi]

i have a similar problem Chibiv. i dont lie... but i am not enitrely open. i try to protect people, and in doing so, make it more awkward for me. "What a tangled we we weave". you'll get stuck eventually. so even thought its difficult- sometimes you need to place yourself first. dont go around being nasty- sheltering is allowed- but if it's placing you under stress (which it obviously is) then stop it. be open- people forget as time marches on. if they can't forgive and forget- then you need to forget them.