Boo Posted June 23, 2003 Share Posted June 23, 2003 [color=gray]From now on, every poem i make gets in this thread =) starting with this one: ______________ Look in my eyes, and tell me what you see. Do you see hatred, or a happy melody. I cant tell, what my eyes say. I cant speak, the way my heart speaks. I dont know, if im able to pray, When my breath stocks, and my eyes stray. I dont know when my eyes lie, or when they search for help; A point of light, when i cry. A grip to relay on, when falling down. And a bit of happyness instead of a frown. But I cant have it all. I can actually have none. Because these shadows, blockng my sight, making me fall, deeper and deeper, caught in my soul...[/color] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vicky Posted June 23, 2003 Share Posted June 23, 2003 Thats...so good! It's really nice and .....ummm, something...oh! It's gone! But, meh it's good. Really! Do you see hatred is me fav line! :) :) :p Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wolf Maximas13 Posted June 23, 2003 Share Posted June 23, 2003 wow, thats deap. didn't know you had it in ya. keep um coming, cause if this is any indication of what your able to do. this could be a very looked at thread Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Boo Posted July 1, 2003 Author Share Posted July 1, 2003 you liked it. =) Well... I kinda have writers block right now, so ill be posting my next one later this summer. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Juu Posted July 2, 2003 Share Posted July 2, 2003 [color=ff00cc] [size=1]Wow, D_A! That was great! I love how the words rhyme without nessicarily ending with the same letters. Very neat. ^_^ 9.3/10.[/color] [/size] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Boo Posted July 10, 2003 Author Share Posted July 10, 2003 [color=gray]Thank you for the comments pjepul, Im glad it was so positive ^_^;; ::EDIT:: deleted poem because of stinkiness of the poem.[/color] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SaiyanPrincessX Posted July 16, 2003 Share Posted July 16, 2003 I really like them D_A. They really get into depth. I can tell you put alot of thought into them; nice job. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pyrophobic Posted August 3, 2003 Share Posted August 3, 2003 Ooh, these are lovely and intense. I love 'em! Nice use of enjambement and emotion. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Boo Posted December 17, 2003 Author Share Posted December 17, 2003 [color=gray]This is my first poem I made in a while... and I actually like it ^__^ Well I know this thread is old so I need a new one... (it even still has D_A in the title...) Oh well, I am proud to present you my newest work: [B]Standing among the shadows[/B] [i] Wandering, thinking, hoping, ever to see a new light again, here she stands, peering into the moon. The frown on her face, that look in her eye. Awaiting a new day, a chance to catch a wave, uncaught before. She takes my hand, and walks deeper and deeper, into the shadows, of what used to be. The shadows of what were and can never be changed. The shadow of a light, which shall never return. Standing among the shadows, a tear escaped from her eye and falls in the nothingness these shades form, heading towards the light these shades hide. Trying to reach them, only to get jammed by another shadow wall. A door locked, not able to be opened. An obstacle to prevent it from going any further then it already has. The tear scattered against the wall, of what used to be. The wall cracked, letting out, a ray of light, to touch her heart, and light it, once again And suddenly I felled, her coming back. Out of the shadows, still holding my arm, shining bright. The tear was gone, and a smile was placed, on the face of the girl, who had never smiled before.[/color][/i] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vicky Posted December 17, 2003 Share Posted December 17, 2003 [SIZE=1][B]Hey, that's pretty good Boo! I really like that one, though it seems a bit to... not my taste... nevermind... I really like it, it's great! Hope you give us some more, you're good! It's a good poem, and I really do like it.[/SIZE][/B] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Create an account or sign in to comment
You need to be a member in order to leave a comment
Create an account
Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!
Register a new accountSign in
Already have an account? Sign in here.
Sign In Now