Guest dayday Posted July 18, 2003 Share Posted July 18, 2003 Ok, today I told someone about this. Then later I told someone else. I still don't know if this will be a good idea or not because I don't want anyone to know. But when I was very small, which isn't that long ago since I'm only 11, I was raped by a few people. Three of them were my cousins and one was a friend of my brother and I. But we weren't that close. He was staying at our house that night. So I was raped by all them and more than once too. One's in jail again for I don't know what reason because he always is. One of them changed and I now can be comfortable around. And the other ones I don't really know about. So yeah I was raped. And no one in my real life knows about it. I never told anyone about it. So I have this problem and I come with it in the open to OB. I need some serious help on this one. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest cloricus Posted July 18, 2003 Share Posted July 18, 2003 This isn't the best place for this sort of thing being a forum that is occupied by mainly younger people but I'm sure there are some people who might be able to help you in some way. My only advice is you really need to see a counsellor of some description because they know how to deal with things better than normal people or make use of a vast support networks scattered around the internet. They are hard to find but they are good. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kesaki_Inedia Posted July 18, 2003 Share Posted July 18, 2003 Oh, dayday, that's awful. I feel so bad for you. did you tell your parents? I don't know what to say. Thats just awful I'd have to go with cloricus on this one. you should talk to a councillor about it. I still think thats just awful... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kaola Su Posted July 18, 2003 Share Posted July 18, 2003 Well a few times before I have seen posts like this, but I would say yes to a cousellor, but I honeslty don't think anything is wrong with sharring it with us b/c no one really knows anything about you so it would do them no good and trying to use it against you or anything. But do get some help from a counsellor or someone you trust and go from there. Love, Kaola Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SadClown Posted July 18, 2003 Share Posted July 18, 2003 I've seen a few threads exactly like this on other boards and posting about them is not the place to get anything except internet sympathy from people whom you don't know, which won't help. My advice is to talk with your family or a real counsilor. You definetly won't find answers here. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OtakuSennen Posted July 18, 2003 Share Posted July 18, 2003 Wow.. Day day, I'm so sorry.. That's awful.. But yeah, I would definitely talk to a counselor and tell your parents (if you haven't already). And you really won't find answers on a message board.. I don't think anyone here is a counselor in profession.. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest dayday Posted July 18, 2003 Share Posted July 18, 2003 Yeah, I didn't think anyone was. But no I've never told my parents. Nobody else knows except two people. And they were just really shocked about it. I knew they wouldn't say anything so that's why I told them. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Syk3 Posted July 18, 2003 Share Posted July 18, 2003 [QUOTE][i]Originally posted by Kesaki_Inedia [/i] [B]did you tell your parents?[/B][/QUOTE] I'd probably take that as a 'no', considering the fact that she mentioned that this was only the third time that she has told someone, and that she has never talked to anyone about it offline. I know how hard it must be to even say what happened online, but this isn't the first time that someone has come to OB for confort on such things, and it certainly won't be the last, so I think that it's a very good idea to get suggestions and such here before you act offline, in my opinion. I know I would have as well if I was in your situation. All I can really say about the incident as a whole is to probably get help from a speicialized counsoler, like other people have mentioned. I'm pretty sure there are people here who have gone through similar ordeals, so I'd probably pay careful attention as to what they did. These sort of things need to be brought out as soon as possible so that those responsible can...well, get what's coming to them. EDIT: I don't know how many of you realize how hard it must have been for her to get this out online, and don't understand just how much help and how many suggestions she can get from people who have gone through this before and know exactly what Dayday should be doing. Sure, you may be getting sympathy from strangers, but she needs advice on what to do, and she can get that here. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Transtic Nerve Posted July 18, 2003 Share Posted July 18, 2003 I would suggest going to the police, but.... because it was so long ago, there's not much they can do. I would highly suggest talking to your parents... telling them is deffinantly something you should do. Then get cousiling or therapy... rape is considered a tramatic life, which means it can greatly vary your true personality. I've met and seen girls who were completely changed because of rape. One of them has this thing where you can't touch her shoulder or she'll freak out. It's really important you do get help cause you probably know already it's changed you. You're obviously looking at this as a very bad thing, which is good, and you know you need some help. Thats what I suggest. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest dayday Posted July 18, 2003 Share Posted July 18, 2003 Actually, my life is turning out really well, besides me thinking perverted things sometimes. But I don't find that strange in any way because almost everyone where I live thinks like that. But sometimes I don't like people to touch my sides or neck cause I'll twitch or scream. And when I'm alone sometimes I start to think of all those times and think strange things. But other than all that, I live my life very normally. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sandy Posted July 18, 2003 Share Posted July 18, 2003 [QUOTE][i]Originally posted by dayday [/i] [B]Actually, my life is turning out really well, besides me thinking perverted things sometimes.[/B][/QUOTE] Trust me, that's perfectly normal in puberty, I reckon it has very little to do with your raping. But raping [i]is[/i] very traumatizing - especially to 11 years old, my gosh! -, so I strongly advice you to talk to your parents ( or any close adult you have), and/or call to a helpline, there's lots of them around, and there are people who know what to do on the other side of the line. It's is a very good thing you've come to admit this to somebody, since the worst thing you can do is to keep this to yourself - it'll only increase the trauma, and you wouldn't want to become one of those jumpy girls Transtic mentioned. :( Just do something about it, and take care. :) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Japan Posted July 18, 2003 Share Posted July 18, 2003 I am very sorry that such a horrible thing happened to you, but you can't just leave it alone. My suggestion is to talk to your parents, or a trusted adult. Then go to a counsuler. They will help you and encourage you every step of the way. Trust me! The best possible choice is to bring out in the open. You may be ashamed, scared, and upset at first, but it is one of the first steps. Keeping it inside will only hurt you worse. What if some of them hurt you again? If you tell you parents, a trusted adult, or a counsuler, they will help bring those guys to justice and keep them from ever hurting you again. If you do that, you can create a new kind of normal. Not like those freaked out girls who scream every time you touch their shoulder. I won't promise you that after you tell your parents the truth that everything will go back to the way you were before the rape, but you would feel better and be braver. Well, Dayday, I hope everything goes well for now on, and good luck. PM me if you want to talk more. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ryan Posted July 18, 2003 Share Posted July 18, 2003 [color=red][font=century gothic][size=1] I'm so sorry. It must be aweful. All I can say is everything that everyone else is saying, because it is the right thing to do. Talk to your parents and see a counselor. Honestly, nothing else can really help you, besides talking with us here at OB!:) I'm glad your feeling a little bit better, and that is good, but if you are thinking that you will just get all happy and try to forget it happened won't work. Go see a counselor and tell your parents. They really need to know. I hope everything works out for you!!:):)[/color][/font][/size] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
eleanor Posted July 18, 2003 Share Posted July 18, 2003 [size=1] What's wrong with internet sympathy? Dayday, it must have been awful to go through that, and I must say you have a pretty strong spirit to have gone on through life like this! But, yeah, you should definatly tell your parents. I can't give you advice, I don't think any of us can! I don't think many ppl actually know what you've been through. Most definately, talk to someone about it, rather your parents of a counselor. I hope everything works out good! [/size] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest dayday Posted July 18, 2003 Share Posted July 18, 2003 Okay, but to tell you all something, they didn't hurt me. Not a single one of them hurt me physically. They were gentle about it even. I don't think they wanted to. Because if they did they had plenty of chances to but didn't. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
boothten Posted July 18, 2003 Share Posted July 18, 2003 [color=darkblue][size=1]Wow Dayday. I'm really sorry you went through that, no body should ever go through that kind of stuff. You should do what everyone here has already said. Talk to your parents. It may seem awkward at first telling them that you've been raped -at the age of 11- but they'll understand and try to seek comfort for you. Next thing is to go see a counsler, they'll help you. You may thing it strange at first, but you'll find it comforting to say this. It would only be worse to keep it all inside, those emotions would soon start to eat away, making you feel depressed and sad. Well, I hope you get through it all! :) If you need to talk, my AIM is LanHikari89. Again, I really hope you get throught it all! :) -Lan[/color][/size] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
eleanor Posted July 18, 2003 Share Posted July 18, 2003 [size=1] They were gentle about it......? Did you try to at least [i]resist[/i] them? ::sigh:: I'm sorry if that sounded rude, but in most rape cases..well, I thought the victom was brutally forced. [/size] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vegitto4 Posted July 18, 2003 Share Posted July 18, 2003 They wouldn't have done it if they didn't want to. Like most others in this thread have suggested, please do tell your parents. If the police can do nothing(which I wont be surprised about) then at least the parents and offenders can "discuss" ( i'd beat them personally, very soundly too) the punishment that could try to suffice for this horrible action. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Taylor Hewitt Posted July 18, 2003 Share Posted July 18, 2003 I think that it's a good thing that you finally told somebody. If it makes you feel better than that's what you should do. Telling your parents would be the best solution. They are still in your life i hear. And your cousins... you still talk to them so err it depends if you like them or not. You like one and you don't want them to get in trouble. Is it a big deal if it was years ago and you like them. Are you fine with it? I don't know. Can you get over it? Probably not. Scarred for life. And at the age of 3 or so that is horrible. Not even in school. I bet they are monsters. They are probably being nice so they don't get busted. If I could do anything - I would. You know that. All The Best Taylor Hewitt Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kesaki_Inedia Posted July 18, 2003 Share Posted July 18, 2003 Dayday I'm with every one else. PARENTS!!! This is why god put them here. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest dayday Posted July 18, 2003 Share Posted July 18, 2003 No, I didn't resist. And TH was right about some things. Not all of them. I was only about 3 or so and it did happen again a few years later. Like maybe another 3 or 4 years later. My brother's friend had spent the night at my house and he came into my room that night. He got caught, because my dad came in the room. And yes, actually it's two of my cousins I like now. One is just a sissy so I just throw him around, and the other one changed. I let him touch me but not like he used to. But the other one hasn't changed any as far as I know. He's in jail right now. I write him letters while I'm at church but that's it. I haven't seen him in a few years. I don't know what's he's on for now but this isn't his first time he went in. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Booboo Posted July 18, 2003 Share Posted July 18, 2003 I'm very sorry about what happened to you dayday. But I thought you had to resist or at least say 'no' for the situation to be called a raping. Did you at least tell them to stop or someting? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Taylor Hewitt Posted July 18, 2003 Share Posted July 18, 2003 Rape is unagreed sex and she was 3 so how the hell would she know what they were doing ok? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
amibasuki Posted July 18, 2003 Share Posted July 18, 2003 [FONT=arial]I believe that is called statutory rape. so yeah, even if she didn't resist, it's still illegal.[/FONT] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Booboo Posted July 18, 2003 Share Posted July 18, 2003 Oh..... well I didn't know she was 3....sorry. Pretend I never said that. I'll be leaving now, bye bye. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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