Infidelity

[satan665]

Most of you seem to think about this only on a personal level. Also I think animals have reasoning capacity, albeit not nearly the same way as us.

Howabout this, people marry and are not always right for each other. Its because people can be romantics and jump into things or whatever. You're married and have kids but are unhappy in general. Cheating is likely a strong temptation at this point. Is it wrong to think this way in that situation? The best solution would be to figure it out between the couple, but who knows? I don't think its quite as clear cut as right and wrong.

If its so wrong, why do so many people have the temptation? Not that many people have the temptation to kill?

[DeathBug]

I think that some things are clearly right, and some things are clearly wrong. Sure, there are many situations with grey areas, but I don't think this is one of them.

If you're unhappy in your relationship, leave it before you start sleeping with other people or whatever. It's clear and dry.

[satan665]

Basically I was hoping you would look a little deeper into it, even if your personal feelings are cut and dry. Life is more interesting that way.

[KarmaOfChaos]

[QUOTE][i]Originally posted by satan665 [/i]
[B]Basically I was hoping you would look a little deeper into it, even if your personal feelings are cut and dry. Life is more interesting that way. [/B][/QUOTE]

[color=deeppink]
Some things deserve deeper thought. This one really doesn't. You either think it's wrong or you don't. Anyone who is 'in the middle' basically just doesn't want to commit to anything because they don't want to offend. There's no gray area here.

-Karma
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[DeathBug]

Exactly what Karna said. This isn't a complex situation. Besides, sense it's an issue of right and wrong, my morality/feelings determines entirely how I feel about it. Ther'es no other factors.

[Mitch]

[size=1] I'd have to say that society and religion define what's wrong and right so much now that there really is not gray area. It's more like you go with it or against it.

I have never been in a serious relationship, so I can't say much there. But I can tell you I am attracted to almost any girl I see; whether it be physical or for the way they act, or the simple gestures they make. Any woman is attractive if you give it enough time...even as ugly as you might predefine them.

I don't go as far as to say I want to have sex with every woman I see. Most of the time I'm not even wanting of sex...mostly I just want affection, and to perhaps hold and cuddle. Sex is not something that defines how much I would go out with this person or whatever. While it is a part of it, it's a small sliver.

Of course I imagine sex and such...but that is only when I am feeling sexual. Which is very random, I must say.

Humans are animals as much as a dolphin is an animal as well as a mammal. There's no over-looking this fact. Just because we are superior to other animals doesn't somehow destroy this fact. We have instinct too. We sometimes act purely on our natures and desires.

But with our logical intellects and what society, parents, and religion has told us, it is obvioulsy deemed wrong to cheat or have thoughts of having sexual or otherwise relations with someone else while we are binded to another.

As I've said before, if we did not have our intellect, and were degraded to the intelligence of what most animals have, then stuff like this wouldn't matter. There would be no right and wrong. We'd basically have sex when we had the urge, and in definition "rape" others. There would be no right and wrong. Only instinct would be a right and wrong. Only impulses.

But obviously this is not so. We are far more intelligent than a lot of animals. So of course it's wrong from what I've been told my whole life to cheat. It hurts more than it helps, and it makes you look bad. Now thinking it is an entirely different thing. That is fine, as long as there is not action.

There it is. Cut and dried.[/size]

[Artemis]

I skipped a bit, so please forgive me if I repeat what others have said.
When it comes down to it, men are turned on by sight, and women by touch. Naturally, a person is far more likely to [I]see[/I] many people of the opposite sex than [I]touch[/I] them. Additionally, men often have more trouble with committment. Though that's the case for some women, it's more common with men. I believe, however, that as men grow older, they realize they want only one connection, and this is how (w/ religious and soceital influences) most wind up in a monogamous relationship. However, temptation is always there. As far as I can tell, men have a harder time resisting those urges than women do. That's were greater infidelity comes in the place of the man.
For those of you guys who are worried about admitting to your girlfriends that you're still (as in natural) attracted to other girls, explain to them that despite the fact that there are so many others who are also attractive, she (your girlfriend) outweighs them all. That's why you're with her, is it not? It should score you some points for complimenting her... :laugh:

[Solo Tremaine]

[COLOR=#503F86]I think the context of the relationship has to be taken into account here.

A long-distance relationship is a very hard thing to keep alive when you've got so many other 'outlets' for a relationship. The fundemental thing about being with someone is that you are actually with them, and even if you're saving yourself for someone so far away, the physical companionship isn't there to gratify when you might need it.

I'm not trying to justify it per se, but there are other things to take into account. You can't say that any one person's morals are completely sound all of the time. You might think and know it's wrong, but it's really just a simple biological process that will most likely out over most others under the right conditions.

EDIT: Okay, I think I'm being a bit pessimistic here, but it's been bothering me for a while. I guess male hormones are harder to ignore.

Which makes biological sense- it's more economical for men to have hundreds of partners than women, seeing as they have to bear the child and men don't. It makes for a better chance of offspring surviving if a female can find a partner that will stay and protect the offspring and provide for her. For men, if they stay with one partner, they have a better chance of their genes being taken onto the next generation. Some psychologist/researcher (probably Darwin) said that altruism was selfish on the level of the genes: i.e. creatures would help those closer to themselves to preserve a greater number of their genes being incorporated into the next generation.

So in fact, if they wanted to have thei genes in as many offspring as possible, a male could run around and have as many partners as possible- although because they won't stay to protect the child or the mother they all have a lesser chance of surviving.

That isn't very socially acceptable, either. A lot of species do mate for life, and I think it's a much more preferable way of doing things.

But when you throw in personality, society and all that jazz, everything gets so much more complicated. Either way I don't think infidelity is necessarily right, but somewhat inevitable in some cases.[/COLOR]

[KarmaOfChaos]

[QUOTE][i]Originally posted by Solo Tremaine [/i]
[COLOR=#503F86]I think the context of the relationship has to be taken into account here.

A long-distance relationship is a very hard thing to keep alive when you've got so many other 'outlets' for a relationship. The fundemental thing about being with someone is that you are actually with them, and even if you're saving yourself for someone so far away, the physical companionship isn't there to gratify when you might need it.[/color][/quote]
[color=deeppink]
How true.

Long distance relationships are incredibly hard and I know from personal experience that it's much more tempting, and far easier, to cheat on your partner, because they're not there. You feel horrible about it, but it's just human emotion. You can't change that. I had to end the relationship because I couldn't take him being so far away, and refused to cheat on him.

So, cheating isn't justified here...but I can see where it's a lot more likely. Still, you should have the courage to face your partner and tell them that it's not going to work like this, instead of cheating behind his or her back.
[/color]
[quote][COLOR=#503F86]
But when you throw in personality, society and all that jazz, everything gets so much more complicated. Either way I don't think infidelity is necessarily right, but somewhat inevitable in some cases.[/COLOR][/QUOTE]
[color=deeppink]
Because of humanity's imperfection, yes. Infidelity happens, quite a lot. Mistakes are made, and people are hurt. But, as you said, that doesn't make it right.

-Karma
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