Separation

[Patronus]

[size=1][color=darkred]So, me and a close friend had a long discussion last night about leaving for college. We both were worried - we don't want to leave our friends. At all.

It's going to be so hard. I want to be independent - yes, but it's kind of hard without friends you know. They are what make you. And I know going to college is partially about making new friends, but what about old friends? Yes, there's a time to move on, but friendship is forever.

I'm wanting to go to New York University, Ohio State University, or Miami University (the one in Florida, not Ohio), and OSU is mainly a last resort. I want to get out of Ohio, but everyone around here wants to go to OU (Ohio University in Athens) or OSU, which means I'll be mainly alone if I go out of state.

The point of this thread isn't to complain - God no - it's about me wanting help, advice. How have you - those of you who have graduated - dealt with departure? How have those who haven't plan on doing so?

-Leh[/color][/size]

[Sara]

[size=1]Most of my friends were seniors last year, so I'm not really upset about leaving myself. It seems sort of anticlimactic, heh.

A few of my friends are going to the same college (and all still hang out together, maybe too much) but I don't really know that I want to go there (although it's definitely an option.) I don't know, after a few months of being removed from them, I'm not sure that I want to spend a ton of time with them again. Don't get me wrong, they're great people...but I don't want to spend the rest of my school career hanging out with only the same people I got to know my sophomore year.

So I don't know. Everyone manages to keep in touch (to one extent or another) via email and instant messengers, which is nice. I do miss having them around--things just aren't the same, and school seems empty sometimes--but there's not a lot I can do about it.

My friend Carr and I may well end up going to the same university, but we probably won't hang out that much. We'd be in different colleges, and I think we're both interested in making [i]new[/i] friends. Not that there's anything wrong with the old ones (heh), but it's come up in conversation a couple times, and it seems like we both want to avoid...well, latching onto each other, for lack of a better term. (Sorry, my mind blanked out.)

I guess I'm just ready to move on. [/size]

[Japan]

Even though I am not in college quite yet, I've dealt with departure many times. I comes with my dad's job. I moved from Illinois to England, and England to Washington State. I miss my old home, my old school, my favorite places, and my friends. When I moved to England, I left behind my very best friend. We did everything together.
Also, after moving to England, I made new friends, found a cool school, and I loved going to London every other weekand, and going to France and Germany every few months. I made new friends, and things got to be great again.
I was very upset when I had to leave Europe. Europe wa a very beautiful and fun place. Washington state may have its cons, but it is alright. I've made new friends that are great in every aspect.
The point I am trying to say is, life goes on. Just keep your chin up and you'll do fine, Leh. Follow your dreams, and your heart. If you want to go out of state after you graduate, then go out of state. You'll be able to call your friends, email them, and write them. So, it isn't the end of the world. You'll make new friends at the college of your choice. Just remember to keep the old.

[future girl]

I have to say I'm with Sara in being ready to move on. I have a lot of friends that I'm almost positive my relationships with will die and although that does sadden me to a certain extent, I'm not fighting it. If everything goes as I have it planned I'll be going very far away for college and I won't have family or friends with me. I'm interested in experiencing something new.

Either way, college is full of ppl so it shouldn't be so hard to find a few ppl you can get along with well enough to not feel lonely.

[Spikey]

Well I would say go. If you want to go to a real good college then go. If you don't want to leave your friends don't. The way I look at it it's four years away from your friends, and college has long breaks so they could come see you or you could come see them. I'd think that it would be a great idea if you really want to go to that college to go. That's just my two cents.

[Semjaza]

I dated a girl who went to that university in Athens. Was rather hard considering I live way out in Chicago. It's not a bad school if you're stuck, honestly. I think you'd probably have a good time.

That said, it can be hard leaving your friends. I originally went away for college my first semmester. About 7 hours away. I'd honestly say that I became even closer to my best friends back in Chicago simply because all we could actually do was [i]talk[/i]. It was beneficial and helped me sort out who I should care about and who I shouldn't.

In some ways, college is a way to move on. Some people will never mature past high school mindsets. It's nice to finally get a perspective on it all.

[Lady Asphyxia]

[size=1]A lot of my friends are in Year 12 this year, and by next year they'll have graduated and chances are I won't see them again. A few I'll keep in touch with, but most I won't have contact with. And while it's sad that I'll be losing some good friends because of laziness and because of time constraint, it will also make me more independant. I'll be able to concentrate better for Year 12 -- a big plus -- and that's a good thing.

I think in time you'll either adapt to new friends, or you'll realise that you've grown apart for one reason or another.

Besides which, the best of friends often don't keep track in a big way. For instance, they might drop in when they're travelling and in town, and it can be just like you never parted. Just because you get older and drift apart doesn't mean that you never had anything together. And it's the fact that you were together; that you have been friends, and you have all these happy memories that counts, right? Things get more complicated as you get older, but at least you'll be able to look back with a smile. And nothing will stop you from giving them a call when you feel the need to reminisce.[/size]

[Darkness]

I just graduated from college a few weeks ago, so I've been through this twice. Once when leaving to school, and once when leaving from school. The thing is that your close friends will always be around. Regardless of whether you meet them in college or high school. My biggest problem was the the double-life aspect to school. It can be a little difficult to make adjustments everytime you come home for the breaks. If you leave, it won't be long before you get used to it.

[SasukeUchiha]

When I left highschool I kind of thought like you did. You just have to figure that the friendships that are truly worth your time and the people who you will probably be lifelong friends with will be the ones that keep in touch with you no matter how many miles are between you.

I lost more friends than I could count when I left highschool, and I was only left with 2. Those 2 are now my best friends, and I would rather have them than the other 70+ people who I just lost touch with.

Hope That Helps A Lil. ^^

[Guest cloricus]

[quote]Friendship is forever.[/quote]I really don't know where you got that idea from... *looks at Disney movies* But it's a load of nothing, the people that you know will be different in a few years time and you might not like that "differentness" so I wouldn't waste time on the choice.[quote]A lot of my friends are in Year 12 this year[/quote]I forgot about that. 0_0;

I've never really had many friends and when I was younger and up north I kind of just found myself with ten or so people who were close friends and after a year or so of being with them I was given the choice to move to a school up there or stay at my current one. It was hard but I decided to stick with my current one and within a year I found it to be the correct option. (All but two of the people disappeared, suicided, moved away, became annoying and just generally dissipated from that area.) Of course the opposite has happened to me in other cases (though highlighting those defeats my point) but education and doing what you want should come first in front of friends which may or may not still be your friends in two years.

[DeathBug]

Good golly, I can't wait to get the heck out of high school. Really, Iv'e got a handful of close friends, but Im' seriously ready to move on. I'm essentially sick of that building and everyone in it.

I'm currently under the delusion that people in college are more mature and sophisticated than those in high school. I know it's a delusion, but Id' like to be happy with the thought while it lasts...

I think the thing I like most about going to college is having a clean slate to start with. I've matured a lot over the past few years, and it's annoying to still be regarded as the same annoying gekk I was in 7th grade.

[Sara]

[QUOTE][i]Originally posted by DeathBug [/i]
[B]I'm currently under the delusion that people in college are more mature and sophisticated than those in high school. I know it's a delusion, but Id' like to be happy with the thought while it lasts...[/B][/QUOTE] [SIZE=1]Brilliant post. *laughs*

One girl I've gone to school with for several years (known her since I was five, yikes) moved out to Maine this year to study marine biology. She loves it there (or at least doesn't let on to me that she doesn't.) Everyone else in her class pretty much stayed in Wisconsin. (There were a couple exceptions, but everyone I'm aware of is still in the Midwest.)

But, yeah. She found something she loved, and went where she could learn it best. That happened to be a thousand miles away....but I think it's been a really good experience for her. Everything I've heard from her has been positive. (Although I haven't had a lot of chance to talk with her too often recently.)

But, yeah. It is possible to go wherever your little heart desires and still keep in contact with your old friends. And you might end up having a fantastic time.

While your friends are probably going to be a consideration when you choose a college, don't base your entire decision around them. If another campus offers exactly what you're looking for, go for it.

*rolls eyes* Okay, enough advice giving. Now, if I could only make up my [i]own[/i] mind, we'd be set![/SIZE]