RPG Super Otaku Bros.

[Dragon Warrior]

Based off my awesome animation here on OB, this RPG will be where I star as the Mario ripoff and Shinmaru stars as the Luigi ripoff. It won't totally be like my animation. It's just where Shin and I kick major butt up in da hizzle in Mushroom Kingdom, word!

Ahem... read it if you want. It's total madness!
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[i]One day, Dragon Warrior was washing his clothes and hanging them out on the line when suddenly a school of toads walked down the street past where he was doing laundry.[/i]

Teacher: Holy Mother of Pancreas! That man's naked!

DW: (turns around) No I'm not. I'm wearing clothes.

Teacher: Sick person! Children, don't look!

Little Kid: (walks over to DW and kicks him in the shin)

DW: Ouchies!

Teacher: Now he's swearing! I'll have you in court, mister!

[b]Later that day, in court...[/b]

Judge: Order! Order! I want to order! (speaks into the box at the drive-thru) Yes, I'd like a cheeseburger and fries. And make it snappy. I have a case to do back at the courthouse.

[b]Later, when the judge was actually there...[/b]

Judge: Okay. Now that I have eaten, we can have this court go under session.

People: Yays!

Judge: DW, are you aware of what you did?

DW: No, actually :<

Judge: Then die! >: O

DW: What? :eek:

Judge: I mean... ahem... you ran around naked and swore a lot. Bad for you.

DW: No I didn't. I wore clothes and I said--

Judge: I don't wanna hear your potty mouth! I'm sentencing you to plumber work with some idiot named Shinmaru. Meeting ajorned.

DW: Don't you mean court--

Judge: SILENCE!

DW: (is beaten down by squeakies)

[b]Later, at that plumber place...[/b]

Fat Slob: And this is your box where you keep anything you want. It pretty much is just good for keeping a shoe in it on account it';s a shoebox. Enjoy. (snorts and leaves)

DW: This sucks.

Shinmaru: I'll say.

Audience: (claps) Yeah!

DW: O.o

Shinmaru: I'm Shinmaru. We're plumbers together.

DW: I feel some crazy show coming on... (is beaten down by squeakies) Ow! That's tender!

[Shinmaru]

OOC: Whee, another RPG. This'll give me something to do in between posts for OB and the Holy OtakuBot. Yes, I went as low as to plug my RPG in another RPG...so sue me. Not literally, of course.

~~~~~

[i]Shinmaru and Dragon Warrior work in the Mines of Plumbia, plumbing away. How fun, eh?[/i]

DW: So, what are we supposed to do all day, anyway?

Shinmaru: Uh...plumb?

DW: ...

Shinmaru: ...

DW: Okay :<

[i]DW and Shinmaru get to work on various plumbing-related activities, such as twisting wrenches, overcharging for their services and pulling up their low-riding pants.[/i]

Shinmaru (pulling up pants): Jeez, why do we have to wear these stupid things, anyway?

DW: I are be having a wedgie :o

Shinmaru: ...I could've done without you telling me that.

DW: XD

[i]Ignoring DW, Shinmaru continues to twist random nuts and bolts. Encountering an especially tricky bolt, Shinmaru tries in vain to twist it off.[/i]

Shinmaru: Argh...I hate it when this happens! >_<"

[i]Shinmaru beats the pipe over and over again until the bolt pops off.[/i]

Shinmaru: ...oops.

DW: What be happening? :(

Shinmaru: You'd better cover yourself.

[i]Shinmaru prepares for the inevitable onslaught of water, but it never comes. The pipe shakes for a few seconds, then expands to the size of a tall plumber whom wears green overalls and a blue shirt.[/i]

Shinmaru: Say, that's pretty nifty...what say we go inside?

DW: Merf.

Shinmaru: ...I'll take that as a yes.

[i]Shinmaru and DW stroll inside the overly large opening to the pipe, not knowing exactly what wacky misadventures would be waiting for them inside.[/i]

[Dragon Warrior]

[i]DW and Shinmaru find themselves inside a large palace all of a sudden.[/i]

Shinmaru: Wow. What are the chances?

???: HOLY ****!!!!

[i]DW and Shinmaru turn abruptly to see an old toad creature hopping up and down in front of them.[/i]

Toadsworth: I'm ****ing Toadsworth and I ****ing swear too much! Welcome.

DW: What are we doing here?

Toadsworth: Why, you're ****ing plumbers and we ****ing need plumbers!

Shinmaru: Oh, you have a bad pipe?

Toadsworth: **** no! The ****ing princess has been captured again and we ****ing need plumbers who are ****ing just like you to ****ing go out there and ****ing save her!

DW: Are you sure this is for little kids? O.o

Toadsworth: So... will you do it, you ****heads?!

Shinmaru: Why plumbers?

Toadsworth: ****, I have no ****ing clue! It's just how these ****ing stories go. Now you ****ing up for it?

DW/Shinmaru: Sure. Why not.

DW: Meh! ;_;

Toadsworth: That's da good ****! Let's get you two ****brains ready for this ****ing journey!

[b]So they were off to get ****ing--I mean... er... they were off to get ready.[/b]

DW: Shinmaru, I ****ing feel weird.

Shinmaru: Hey! NO swearing!

DW: But Toadsworth swore!

Shinmaru: He's old and will probably die very soon. He's allowed to cherish his last moments here.

DW: Oh :<

Shinmaru: Now what did you say? (fixes new plumber suit) you are bloated?

DW: Well... yes, but I actually said I feel weird.

Shinmaru: That's because you need your Micky D's. You haven't had your McDonalds yet today.

DW: That's true =D

Shinmaru: Shall we?

DW: No :<

Shinmaru: O.o

DW: I mean yes...

[i]And so they were off to McDonalds, which was conviently built a block away from the Mushroom Castle.[/i]

DW: My pants are riding me againness! ;_;

[Shinmaru]

[i]DW and Shinmaru step through the automatic (nifty) opening doors to the insanity that is McDonalds. Little kiddy mushrooms running around, middle-aged mushrooms arguing over heavily oversalted fries and pimpily faced teenaged mushrooms cowering behind their cash registers...there is only one word for it: McDonalds.[/i]

DW: Stop being overdescriptive >: o

Shinmaru: Okay, okay...sheesh, I'm not allowed to describe my settings every once in a while?

DW: :<

Shinmaru: ...I hate you sometimes.

[i]DW and Shinmaru get into the massive, curving line of parents. They take a long, hard look at their surroundings. The line was moving slower than Syk3 in a chat (just joking around, buddy >_>) and several people were just sitting back and slurping their collective drinks. The slurping wouldn't stop...the incessant noise was grating ever so slowly on Shinmaru's patience...with every slurp, he delved further and further into the bowels of madness...until finally...finally, he snapped.[/i]

Shinmaru: That's it!

[i]Shinmaru leaped into the air and came crashing down upon the head of the mushroom that was directly in front of him. He bounced slightly higher in the area, whilst some music signifying the hit went off in the background and a small 100 came out of the mushroom's head.[/i]

DW: Hey...how did you do that?

[i]Shinmaru ignored DW and kept up his killing spree...200...500...1,000...2,000...5,000...and, finally, he leaped a triumphant leap onto the head of the last mushroom in line and got a nice little 1-Up for his efforts. He landed softly in front of the cash register, where the teenage mushroom was still trembling slightly.[/i]

Teenager: Uh....c-can I help you, s-sir?

Shinmaru: Yeah, I'd just like some fries and a drink, please.

Teenager (wipes forehead): Okay...that'll be five million coins, sir.

Shinmaru: WHAT?!

[i]The teenager cowers back in fear of the anger that is Shinmaru. Word. DW runs up to Shinmaru in an effort to calm him down.[/i]

DW: Yo, you can't just explode up in this dizzle, dawg. You gotta keep smooth in da heezy fo sheezy, word.

Shinmaru: ...what the hell are you talking about?

DW: I don't know, exactly :<

Shinmaru: ...

[i]Shinmaru sighed and decided to just walk out of the McDonalds. DW followed him, then decided to come back.[/i]

DW: Forgot our fries and drinks.

[i]DW swiped the fries and drinks before following Shinmaru out the automatic doors.[/i]

[Dragon Warrior]

[i]After eating those delectable treats from McDonalds, the two heroes made their way back down the block and back to the Mushroom Castle where Toadsworth was bouncing up and down and swearing as usual.[/i]

Toadsworth: Holy ****, you two ****heads! You just went and ****ing ate while the ****ing princess needs help? You two are ****ing ***holes! Man!

Shinmaru: DW hadn't had his delicious lunch yet.

Toadsworth: DW can ****ing kiss my *** for all I ****ing care! Now get the **** out there and save that God **** princess!

[i]So DW and Shinmaru were equipped with absolutely nothing. Once they left the Mushroom Castle, they found they were on the setting of one Super Mario Bros. (the first of the series).[/i]

[center](Mario World 1-1 Music Plays)[/center]

DW: I are hungryness :<

Shinmaru: Shut up >: o

DW: ;_;

Shinmaru: I'm sorry... it's just... you suck and it's sad.

Goomba: Hi there, partners. Haven't seen you 'round these parts. Care to take a snooze in my shack?

DW: HOLY SHIZZLE! HE WANTS SEX! (kills Goomba by hopping on it's head)

Goomba: I are daedededed. X.x

Shinmaru: This world is messed up, I must say.

[i]Suddenly some dude on a cloud falls out of the sky and kills a passing traveler.[/i]

???: (dusts self off) Holy crap, that's messed up, word.

Shinmaru: Who in the name of Syk's sammich are you?

Lakitu: <------

DW: :< OH MY

Lakitu: What the hell is :< ?

Shinmaru: Some face he made up.

Lakitu: Well, stop it already. It scares the **** out of me.

Shinmaru: Where you from?

Lakitu: I dunno. But what I do know is I'm a traveling salesman and I sell Spikeys. Want one? They come in red in green and when I chuck them at you, they are in ball form until they unravel when they hit the ground.

Shinmaru: No thanks. We're broke.

Lakitu: You suck >: o *kicks shinmaru in the shin*

Shinmaru: ;_;

Lakitu: That'll teach ya!

DW: Hey, smelly cloud man! Wanna come with us on our journey?

Lakitu: NO >: o

DW: ;_;

Lakitu: Okay... but just so I wait until you have a zillion coins to pay me for one of these Spikeys. Then I'm out of here.

Shinmaru: I thought they were called Spineys.

Lakitu: ****, son. I know what my own damn merchandise is called. Now let's start traveling before I get a hankerin' for subway.

[i]How fun :<[/i]

[Shinmaru]

[i]Shinmaru and DW continued to run through Level 1-1, while Lakitu just sorta...floated there. The music continued in a neveredning jingle of doom as DW and Shinmaru made their way through the level, jumping many a Goomba and Koopa Troopa.[/i]

Shinmaru: Man, this is easy!

DW: Merf.

Shinmaru: ...you lost me.

DW: Ack!

Shinmaru: Eh?

DW: Look out ahead!

[i]Shinmaru comes to a dead stop, which is a good thing, since he came within mere centimeters of being struck by a hammer. Yes, a hammer, thrown by none other than...A HAMMER BROTHER!!!!! OMFG!!!!1111[/i]

Lakitu: What the hell is a Hammer Brother?

Shinmaru: Looks kinda like a Koopa Troopa...only it's throwing hammers.

[i]Shinmaru, DW and Lakitu stare at the Hammer Brother, whilst it aimlessly continues to throw hammers.[/i]

Shinmaru: Uh...doesn't it ever stop?

Lakitu: Apparently not.

DW: I are getting dizzy @_@

Shinmaru: ...just throw a Spiny at it.

Lakitu: No way, man! These are like my children!

[i]Lakitu clutches at his Spinys as if to emphasize this point. Either that or he's into pain because, damn, do those things ever hurt.[/i]

Shinmaru: Just do it!

Lakitu: Fine!

[i]Lakitu rears back and throws the Spiny at the Hammer Brother. The Spiny bops him on the head and he keels over in a heap, several hammers hitting the ground at once.[/i]

Shinmaru: ...

Lakitu: ...

DW: :)

Shinmaru: That was surprisingly easy.

Lakitu: ...almost too easy.

[i]Shinmaru and Lakitu stare at the Hammer Brother, expecting it to pop back to life at any moment...on and on they stare, wondering when life will re-enter the bones of the Hammer Brother. Then, DW just strolls right past it.[/i]

DW: What are you two waiting for? You're wasting the timer...we won't get bonus points.

Shinmaru & Lakitu: ...

[i]Shinmaru and Lakitu follow DW to the end of the level where, presumably, bonus points are waiting.[/i]

[Dragon Warrior]

Wario: (wobbles over to a can of beer in a kooler and scratches himself) Hahaha... smif. (drinks his beer) I wanna watch TV, but all that's on is your mom doin' the meuuuhhaehhehebweeeh!

Waluigi: *weird laughing sounds*

Wario: What? Two plumbers and a spiny-throwing smelly cloud man are coming this way to get bonus points for good time? These are the times I wish I were sober... BUT I'M NOT. (dances)

[i]Just then, Shinmaru, DW, and Lakitu arrive.[/i]

Shinmaru: Here we are!

DW: (leaps from a tall stack of blocks, hits the flag pole and falls down, ripping the flag off with him) OUCHIES!

[center][i]2000 pointsness![/i][/center]

Shinmaru: WTF?

Wario: Hey...

[i]Everyone turns to see Wario in his underwear.[/i]

Everyone: Ewww!

Wario: You toreded down my flag. Die in a sec... (takes a long drink of his beer) Okay. Now die. (collapses)

Shinmaru: I thought Wario didn't show up until many games after this one?

Waluigi: *weird laughing sounds*

Shinmaru: WTFH [what the f---ing hell] is Waluigi doing here?

DW: MEH >: o (kills Waluigi)

Lakitu: You can't kill him. He may have coins.

Shinmaru: Okay, shut up, everyone. Wario is almost dead from alcohol poisoning and DW almost killed Waluigi and right now we look like we attempted murder so we can't be seen with these bodies.

[b]But not too far away...[/b]

Policeman: LA LA LA. Fun in the moon!

Policeman2: Let's go see if anyone attempted murder by that flag and castle.

Policeman: Sounds like a plot!

[b]Back with the heroes...[/b]

Shinmaru: Ah **** ;_;