Drix D'Zanth Posted January 22, 2004 Share Posted January 22, 2004 What a difficult subject, no? Considering the relationships I've developed on Otakuboards with some of its members, it has occured to me that I am actually quite [i] fond[/i] of some of them. Is this a healthy thing? Let's address this: Considering the ambiguity of an online relationship, it is entirely impossible to acutally know someone to the same respect as a peer or acquaintance. in a recent study of psychological behavior (from which I'll provide the link), the human brain responds, communication-wise, 60% to body language, 20% vocal tone, and 20% actual message. I would be intrigued to know your thoughts, especially considering some of you have [b]met[/b] an OB member. I'm not about to advicate OB, or any website for that matter, as safe for meeting people. Do you feel that it is possible for an internet friendship, or to test the limits of your conservatism, relationship, to work? I suppose this is a slightly introspective look at one of the posibilites a good message board can provide. I would also like to congradulate Japan_86 on her 400 post count, following this message. *opens champagne, blows up large amounts explosives, fires guns* Congrats friend. Wow, I can actually call her friend, and believe it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wrist cutter Posted January 22, 2004 Share Posted January 22, 2004 I guess there are a few people online I would call "friends". But I realize that I'll never quite know these people the way I know people who I actually see, and so I guess my relationship with them is significantly different. In general though, I use the message boards and such more for just discussion purposes rather than actually making friends, or anything of that nature. It works better that way... online friends just don't seem to work out as well... or something/ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Japan Posted January 22, 2004 Share Posted January 22, 2004 I believe that online relationships are unhealthy. Though some people have them nonetheless. It is just that the long distance thing could become quite of a problem, if you are far apart and still living under your parents' roof. I'd rather just stay friends with everyone. Also, I feel that online relationships can make the couple that is in one, frustrated and depressed. I know that I was depressed a little while ago because of this issue. I also see in other people, how it affects them negatively. I think that online friends can offer no more, and no less, than a friendship. Thanks Drixy:) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lea Posted January 22, 2004 Share Posted January 22, 2004 [COLOR=blue]Sometimes, I forget that people on the internet aren't as honest and sane as I would like to believe. In my whole experience with the internet, I have met people who weren't who they said they were. There have been kids from school that pretended to be other kids, and gushed about their "uncontrolable love" for me. Like the one time a drunk kid snuck on his friend's AIM name....but that's another story. I have met a kid who wasn't....stable. It just became apparent when the more I talked to him, the more he seemed erratic and dangerouse. 0.0 In the end, I think you have to exercise your caution, and trust your judgement. If you feel there is something wrong, then there is. [/COLOR] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
White Mage Posted January 22, 2004 Share Posted January 22, 2004 [size=1]It's nice to be friends with some people over the net, But not to replace them over your real life friends. My girlfriends friend choses some 19 in Canada over her best friends at times, and thats not good. Online relationships are for Stupid people, and I hate stupid people ^_~[/size] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
outlawstar69 Posted January 22, 2004 Share Posted January 22, 2004 *Yay! I'm back from my OB hiatus :) !* Online relationships... this issue depends alot on the nature of the relationship, I think. For instance, I think for the most of us, there aren't many people that we've met online that you would invite to a holiday dinner, or on a family vacation with you. (Thank goodness most of us exercise some sort of caution.) Are you refering to a relationship that consists mostly of something like, "ohh yeah, I saw that anime / played that video game", or "yeah, my day was kinda lame because I was grounded" kind of depth? Does this pertain to exclusive anonymous relationships; would an online relationship with someone you knew personally before, but they moved away? We've heard stories of people who end up getting kidnapped by people they've met online, but we've also heard stories of people who meet online and get married, and live quite happily. Concerning one of my own questions, does anyone think that having an online friendship with someone you knew personally, and hung out with be able to be the same as when they were physically there? (Not to change the subject intentionally or anything, just want some thoughts about this.) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Epid3mic Posted January 22, 2004 Share Posted January 22, 2004 Online relationships are all good and fun...to a certain extent. There are a few problems with metting someone online. One, probably the the biggest, is that the person may just plain not be who they say they are. This could be for various reasons, that I will not get into here (people are wierd). Secondly, most people act different online then they do IRL. This can be a slight change to a drastic one. This usually consists of the said person becoming more open online than off. But when you talk to someone online who you have never met off, the person you are talking to can be quite different the person you wouldn meet in real life. Another thing with online relationships is that there is a much decreased sense of commitment. When you meet someone IRL, and you keep talking to them and meeting them, and find out you don't like this person, you can't just block them. Hehe...that would be kind of funny though... So, in conclusion, if you just want to have a friendly chat about a certain subject, online is just as good as anyplace. But it may not be the safest place to find a life-long mate. But then again, my friend's uncle met his wife online 0_o Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ryu_Sakura Posted January 22, 2004 Share Posted January 22, 2004 I know people from all over the wold: Africa, Asia, other parts of North America, South America, Europe, ane 1 from Australia. It's the only way I can keep in touch, being I refuse to speek often. So, For me, I like online relationships, well, first because I can Be myself, and don't have to fake it to be "in" because online I can find people who like what I like. It's a bad thing if you get so involved you become obsessed with this person you have to meet them in person. I think that is unhealthy, Because how do you know they're not faking what they say? Or if they are a bad (into drugs, guns, ect...) person? What would you do then? I mean if you know them really well, for like 5 years, you talk on web cam, or your freind knows them really really well, so much that they have met them in person before they talked online, (like at camp or somhing) I'm begining to ramble, but thats my bit. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SasukeUchiha Posted January 22, 2004 Share Posted January 22, 2004 Online friends are great, just gotta weed through the scummy people. I have had friends on aim for over 2 years now, and it might sound sad but I do consider them friends. Doesnt mean I am going to run over to there houses or nething, because you never know. But there isnt a problem with getting close to someone online, just dont let that spill into real life. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Annie Posted January 22, 2004 Share Posted January 22, 2004 [QUOTE][i]Originally posted by White Mage [/i] [B][size=1]Online relationships are for Stupid people, and I hate stupid people ^_~[/size] [/B][/QUOTE] [color=indigo][i][size=1]That was stupid. There are people out there who have steady relationships online, whether it be a friendship or couple (boyfriend/girlfriend, boyfriend/boyfriend, girlfriend/girlfriend), that are actually normal and friendly, and have a special meaning. Me being one, you want to call me "stupid"? Call me what you may, but my friends are dear to me. A friend, in my opinion, is someone you can rely on to be there for you in times of need. Someone whom you can talk to and seek comfort in. Someone who cheers you up by mere words alone, which is completely possible IRL as it is online. I come online to talk to my friends here on the OB because, even though they are online friends, they seem to help me more than my IRL friends do. So an online relationship, to me, is just as important, or more, as an IRL relationship. And if you want to call someone stupid for that, then you are disgusting. Continuing; As I said above, I am one of the people who carry out an online relationship, and have been for over three months. I adore SilpheedPilot, I understand him better than I understand any of the guys that I know IRL. I won't explain to you why, that is my personal business. I don't base my life on this relationship because of the fact that he and I have not personally met IRL. He and I both have our lives IRL and we focus on that life. There are more important things outside of the net that we divert our attention to. And of course, internet relationships can be unhealthy. That's only if you allow it to be unhealthy. The internet is just that, the internet. It can be real or surreal. The danger in the internet is the way a person takes it into mind. Taking it too seriously can cause mental issues, such as withdrawl, misconceptions of what is reality or a strand of HTML codes, the list goes on. Some people just can't/won't see that it's only the internet and that's where it's unhealthy and dangerous. Sure people lie about themselves online, and we can't help that. You have to rely on yourself for protection against those people. If you don't feel comfortable telling someone your name or what state/country you live in or your age, then don't tell that person. If they persist, there's that handy-dandy "ignore" or "block" button. If the person you are talking to online doesn't persist you for information, doesn't ask you too personal of questions for a long time, lets you get comfortable with your conversations (even if they are something as harmless as "How are you today? How is the weather where you live?"), then that to me, is someone you could probably trust [b]later on[/b] down the road.[/color][/size][/i] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Semjaza Posted January 22, 2004 Share Posted January 22, 2004 I personally don't believe in online relationships in the sense of boyfriend/girlfriend. In fact, I find the idea almost insulting to those who actually have real, tangible relationships in their everyday lives. Typing doesn't replace anything. That's isn't to say you cannot form an attraction or fondness. I've dated a girl I met online and was friends with only on the computer for about two years. I obviously had an attraction to her. However, nothing was decided until we met and decided we could actually pull off a real, long distance relationship that wasn't based around the computer. That lasted for 7 months or so. In the end, you're still talking to people. In fact, it totally bypasses the whole "appearance" side of it all. If you talk to the person enough, you really can do nothing more than speak and share ideas with eachother. In some ways, I think that aspect is quite beneficial. I personally put a lot more in the intelligence of someone, but with most people you probably won't even get to that stage because of your style or first impressions or who knows what else. The idea of these friendships isn't really all that unhealthy, in my eyes. I genuinely enjoy talking to many people and look forward to seeing them online from time to time. However, what would be unhealthy is letting them take presedence over your life offline... which I'd imagine is a major concern for many people. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mitch Posted January 22, 2004 Share Posted January 22, 2004 [size=1][color=red] I pretty much go with what Tony said. And you're totally right, Tony, about it feeling unhealthy for online friends to take presedence over your life. I'd have to say though, online I can be a lot more personal than I usually am in real life. In real life, I've very rarely told someone how I feel, or ranted at them. It's different here though. I've ranted to many online friends of mine, as I'm sure many of you know that have had me do it. So basically, I do look forward to speaking to my online friends, but not to some immense extent. At times it is some immense extent, but lately, I've been seeing the reality of things: that I need to get a job, that I need to get some actual friends other than the ones I have. In real life. I only have two people I call friends. It's been like that most of my life, really. I'm a quiet person around a stranger. Plus my family's moved multiple times in my life. Plus I used to be a really ignorant kid. But now, it's much the same. I mean, sure, there's flattering them, or humoring them, but I just don't show who I really am in some amazing way. I just can't communicate as well as I can through just writing things down. I'm sure I could grow as an orator (and I will), but at this point, most of the things I say are either sarcastic, or just talking to myself (which is another thing I do lol. It's fun, everyone should do it). That's the basis of what I say every day, other than replying to some question in school, or whatnot. This has sort of changed in a small way, though, since my writing of columns in the newspaper. Some of you may recall my one article, "Pristine Nazerene." That article was deceptively dark, and many people at my school didn't understand it, but those who did, I think they got more of an understanding of who I can be at times. But people still don't know me, nor understand me. I mean, if I don't even understand myself, how can someone else understand me more? Exactly. I think, at this point, the internet does take a decently large presence over my life. I mean, it's not like it's killing me or anything, but I'm usually on once a day at least, for an hour or more. I've been trying to stay off more lately, though. But this week, hopefully, I plan to force myself to get a job. Anyway, I'm going off topic. I actually value a lot of my friendships online. Even moreso than some people I know in real life. Which I think is a sad fact, but it's a fact nonetheless. I do have my two friends though, and I do value them. But one of them, his name's Adam, we don't really hang out much anymore heh. It's no big deal. The other one, Ryan, he's a computer nerd. He's a really cool friend though, I really value our friendship. Yeah. I have no clue where I'm going with this post. Basically, I'm just reinforcing what Tony said on some level. The internet has its pros and cons for friendships. I think they allow someone to be themselves more, I mean, there's not the appearance factor really, not whatnot else. You can just be yourself ultimately. Which is something, often, I hide in real life, for reasons even I can't define. It's just how I am, I guess. I mean, I do show myself; just not every facet of myself. My mood changes often, and I think you can tell here on OB when that happens (anyone remember me bashing education? Yeah. That was when I wasn't in too good of a mood lol. Right now, I actually love education. See how it changes so fast?) and on My O as well. I've been in a good mood lately, though, so yay. But when I'm in some moods, I just keep it to myself, listen to music, whatever else. I'm pretty sure a lot of people my age are like this, though. Who knows. What I can't stand is girlfriend/boyfriend relationships online though. I doubt they often work. I mean, once you meet the person in real life, what's going to happen then? Then everything's factoring in. As much as people deny it, physical implications are quite more important than anything when you first meet someone. I know when I first meet someone physically that I can't just be myself. I'm not like that. I have to become comfortable with that person first, have some understanding, have something on some level that goes on to become what the internet allows--just being yourself, then, now, and raw. What can I say. I'm a loser. :p Well, I'd rather be a loser than win all the time. When you win all the time, you get arrogant and hubrant. And I guess I feel the stereotypical role of a writer as well, all to myself most of the time and all.[/size][/color] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chaos Soldier Posted January 22, 2004 Share Posted January 22, 2004 I'm not a big fan of any sort of online relationships. I tried that sort of thing many moons ago and it just never works. Wether its a "boyfriend/girlfriend" sort of relationship or just trying to make friends type they just don't suffice to the real thing. Social Interaction is a good thing but not online.. since chances are you'll never really meet nor interact with any of these friends. So what's the point of having friends you'll never hang out with or see??? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PiroMunkie Posted January 22, 2004 Share Posted January 22, 2004 [size=1]Heh ... I feel like I have so much I could say, but yet I can think of nothing. Online [i]friendships[/i] can surely develop. It is surely a selective basis, or should be, but I do believe friends can exist without the presence of physical contact. Through my own personal experience, I have a few people I would actually consider friends out of the many people I have met. Most are just acquaintances, but some people have actually made a connection with me that makes me feel comfortable in talking about certain things with them. Most cases of kidnappings from online meets are because people are just ignorant. Not the kidnappers, but those who are kidnapped. They run out and meet people without really knowing them. Also, keep in mind, "that ppl whu typ lik this r usully teh ones who hav this happn 2 them." (A) Those kinds of people are usually young anyway, and (B) if they are not, then they are too braindead to have a lot of common judgement. For a while, police hard a hard time tracking down online predators because the decoys they had typing as "innocent children" were typing like your typical mature person would. It was not until they realized, "Hey, 'kidz talk lik this on teh net, lolz OMG!!!1!'" that they actually began picking up pace. I understand the point people actually [i]act[/i] different in person, but even if you are friends long enough, you should be familiar with what the person's actions might be. Surely, I can recall in conversations with people where I have said things like, "Well, in a situation like that I would do (blah blah blah)," or "I have a habit of (blah blah blah)." So people will have preconceived notions about how a person is going to act before they meet (if they [i]do[/i] meet). It is when those are not what was expected you should start worrying, heh. As for online boyfriend/girlfriend relationships, I would like to think it is possible for them to work out. I do not have any significant doubts about it. However, until the two actually meet, I would moreso consider the relationship as "exclusive friends." I know it can be unhealthy to try such a feat, because humans need human contact, but it really just depends on the types of people within the relationship. There are so many variables that can go into judgements on both sides of the case, it is hard to really debate either side. Online relationships in general [i]can[/i] be unhealthy, though. I know that personally. However, I believe it builds character to go through the trails and tribulations. I do not think I would be as strong-willed of a person if I did not fight the negative aspects that can result from long-distance relationships.[/size] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest lavalamp Posted January 22, 2004 Share Posted January 22, 2004 I think the internet is really nothing more than a sanctuary. I think online relationships can be fun and mildly exciting, but at the same time, having one is bittersweet when your "real" life isn't quite up to par. What is a "real" life, anyway? Does seeing someone make it real? I think that's a ridiculous concept. I'm not sure I agree with the comment regarding allowing internet relationships to take precedence over your life offline. Why not? What halo does offline have that online doesn't? Yes, there are some disadvantages to living your life purely online: a lack of social skills, a lack of consistency regarding the relationships we're talking about, a lack of a real "ground" in which you can place a foot on. And? If you do let this take precedence over your offline life, it's not as if you're really going to need all that you lose. While it's impossible to avoid all minor interaction offline, you can keep it at that: minor interaction. It's insanely difficult to balance relationships when you're holding many on different "reality" platforms, if that makes any sense. Speaking from personal experience, I'd say it's nearly impossible to hold onto friendships in one or the other if you're completely dedicated like you should be to one. If not impossible, it's very difficult; I haven't had any success. In regards to people online having the ability to lie to you, I'm torn. In some warped way, online is almost more pure. Yes, you can't see the person you're talking to, and therefore you absolutely must stick to the intellectual side of the individual. Romantic relationships, as bizarre to some as they may be, really flourish from this. Yes, people can lie. However, even in lies you realize that a personality a person is adopting is a clear representation of a "real" personality on a deeper level. The large problem people have is with gender, and I honestly can't say I understand this. If you are involved with someone who is lying about their gender, what's the problem? I think this is where people truly become insanely shallow and neglect what they should be focusing on: the mind of the person they're speaking with. Even if you are in a romantic relationship with someone online and you find out they are not quite what you thought they were, they are in fact still the same person. I think with the internet, you really have to let go of previously established norms and learn to embrace people for who they are on a different level. "A/S/L" is not the different level. That's the beauty of the internet. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DeathKnight Posted January 22, 2004 Share Posted January 22, 2004 [color=crimson]Romantically, it would be advisable to not do anything that was potentionally long distance for a great duration of time- it leads to alot of unneccesary pain and generally doesn't work out. Otherwise, all systems are go. It is just a different band of communication and I have acquired many good friends. I've met an OBer IRL and it was fine- no horrible revelation or anything of the sort. Still, keep your eyes open. You should be able to see the chinks in the armor if you are good enough.[/color] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
the_fizz Posted January 22, 2004 Share Posted January 22, 2004 [color=royalblue]On-line relationships are a 50/50 chance of turning into something real or a complete falsehood. One way or the other depends on the people who choose to become something more then ?chat buddies?. I mean if they ?keep it real? in some ways it is the same as staying in touch with an old school friend or a family member that has moved away. Although, on the other hand there is always that underlining chance that the people you meet are putting up a front or something fallacious and bogus in that relationship. That is always the risk of choosing to meet individuals, weather it is in person or on-line. The people you meet in life are not always going to have best intensions for that relationship, on-line or in person. Thus, if you are asking if it is ?Right and Good? or ?Wrong and Bad? it is up to the people in that relationship to be honest and up front with one another from the get go or that relationship will never work one way or the other on-line or in person. As, for me do I agree or disagree with meeting people and forming relationships with other off the internet, I would have to say ?Yes? and ?No? to starting one. I have meet two really great friends for chatting on-line and one really [b]BIG A**HOLE[/b] to boat. So, just be careful with whom you choose to form relationship with in your life, weather it is on-line or in person, you can never tell what that other person is thinking, even if you think you know them. In the end everyone will prove themselves one way or the other. [/color] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
James Posted January 22, 2004 Share Posted January 22, 2004 [color=#707875]I think that everyone is different when it comes to something like this. For the most part, there are very, very few people on the Internet who I would actually list as "friends" (at least in terms of comparing them to "real life" friends). But that's largely because it takes a lot of conversation and a lot of interaction to form a closer bond. Most people I talk to on the Internet are people that I'd simply consider to be acquaintances. They're people I like talking to, but they aren't people who have a great deal of consequence in my everyday life. That's just how it is -- it's part of the limitations of the Internet as a medium for communication. However, I don't doubt that close bonds can exist via the Internet. I know that I've certainly built some very strong friendships based on online contact. But again, the actual number of people who fit in that category is very, very small. But that's me. Everyone is different. I'm sure that some people take the Internet more seriously than others in general. For some, they probably never form any kind of bond via the 'net. For others, I'm sure it's a more serious business. It just comes down to the individual.[/color] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Heaven's Cloud Posted January 22, 2004 Share Posted January 22, 2004 [color=indigo]In some ways I feel that internet friendships are really no different than ordinary, real life friendships. Friendships usually occur when two people enjoy one another?s attitudes and outlooks. Sure, a person can easily mask their true self on the net, but I have also known many people that masked their true self in real life. Lies are universal. However, I have always had varying levels of friendship and I really can?t think of too many people that made it past my outer most echelon. A lot of people I have met online intrigue me, and I would enjoy meeting them?but I would enjoy meeting them to satisfy a certain level of curiosity I think. As far as online relationships (ie: boyfriend, girlfriend) go, I would not mind meeting someone online, but it would have to be a situation where we could easily meet in person. I do require physicality in a relationship.[/color] ~BIG "YAY" TO DRIX Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
White Mage Posted January 22, 2004 Share Posted January 22, 2004 [QUOTE][i]Originally posted by Annie [/i] [B][color=indigo][i][size=1]That was stupid. There are people out there who have steady relationships online, whether it be a friendship or couple (boyfriend/girlfriend, boyfriend/boyfriend, girlfriend/girlfriend), that are actually normal and friendly, and have a special meaning. Me being one, you want to call me "stupid"? Call me what you may, but my friends are dear to me. A friend, in my opinion, is someone you can rely on to be there for you in times of need. Someone whom you can talk to and seek comfort in. Someone who cheers you up by mere words alone, which is completely possible IRL as it is online. I come online to talk to my friends here on the OB because, even though they are online friends, they seem to help me more than my IRL friends do. So an online relationship, to me, is just as important, or more, as an IRL relationship. And if you want to call someone stupid for that, then you are disgusting. [/color][/size][/i] [/B][/QUOTE] [size=1]Well it doesnt matter who does It, It's MY own opinon and that doesnt mean I think everyone should think the same way I do, so it really doesnt matter. Is it because you cant get an real life relationship? Just wondering why people think its cool.[/size] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Queen Asuka Posted January 22, 2004 Share Posted January 22, 2004 [color=hotpink][size=1]Wow, a very interesting thread, indeed. I must say that I have developed a handful of especially good friendships by spending time online, especially here on the OtakuBoards. But the ones that I trust and wouldn't mind meeting in person are the ones that I have talked to for a long time, have read about their lives, have talked to them about their problems, and have related to them on some level. When you get a phone call and snail nail from me, then you should consider yourself something special. Now in my opinion the people who are lied to and kidnapped and all of those insane things are the ones who set themselves up for it. They go into the world of the interenet NOT to make friends, but to flirt, "cyber," and have some kind of "sexual good time." And that's how it has always came across to me. To actually find some decent people to talk to was pretty difficult for me way back when. Want to hear a story? My sister was "in love" with some guy from North Carolina a few years ago. She talked to him on the phone all the time. She actually tried to run away and go and meet him, but luckily me and my parents caught her before she made it up the road (it was about 2 am when she left). That was when we found out where he lived, and after she had ran up an $800 phone bill that my parents still are trying to pay off. She was only about 14. See what happens? I actually had to nice opportunity to meet Juuthena this summer on my trip to Oregon/California. It was sort of surreal to meet her in person, but then again, she was just exactly as I had always percieved her to be. Because of that great experience, I can't wait to meet others that are also close to me. As for relationships (with dating and such), I had a pretty bad experience about three years ago. I think it's only going to work out if the people can actually be there with one another. If you truly have feelings for the person, then if it is in your power, you can make it work no matter what. But I think it's only safe to have one of these relationships if you are legally an adult and can therefore have the means to meet this potential "mate." Otherwise, if you're 14 and you wont be able to meet this person until you're 18, then it just seems kind of fruitless...I would say to go and find someone who is there for you right now. Now I will admit, it's easier to talk to people via the internet than in person. It's so much easier to let your feelings flow and not have the restriction of someone seeing you embarrassed. And that is why I think friendships work. And eventually the liars will come out because the will feel so guilty. Just look at Justin. :p[/color][/size] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Charles Posted January 23, 2004 Share Posted January 23, 2004 [QUOTE][i]Originally posted by White Mage [/i] [B][size=1] Is it because you cant get an real life relationship? Just wondering why people think its cool.[/size] [/B][/QUOTE] Let's not get nasty. If we're going to muse over this subject, we don't need anything resembling personal attacks. Otherwise, the thread will degenerate and I'll be forced to go crazy. Anyway, I'm have a very cynical outlook concerning online relationships. Especially so-called romantic ones. It's one thing to utilize a matchmaking service where reasonably located adults compare shared interests and there's an immediate (and realistic) intention to meet. Even my opinion on this method isn't favorable, but I'm inclined to look at it in a more positive light than say, talking with someone via AIM and coming to the false conclusion that a lasting relationship with said individual is plausible. A real relationship should be founded on honesty and intimacy. Those things aren't wholly available online because of the anonymity and distance attached to the Internet. It's both natural and common for people to contrive mental images and ideals of "what" and "who" someone should be to fit their own interests. Which, of course, leaves a lot of room for disappointment when they discover they're attracted to that perception instead of a real person. I wonder if that made sense. O_o;; There are just so many complications in addition to that, it's not even funny. Otherwise, I see most people online as text. I consider some friends and value that friendship, but it's difficult to categorize them with people I interact with in my everyday life because once again, the personal contact just isn't there. Especially since I try especially hard to detach my real life from that of my Internet ventures. I rarely delve into personal discussions or share my private life and whatever problems I face with anyone online. I just see this as a place to escape all that. And really, I'm not actively searching for companionship online. I just want to have fun. I guess that's my motivation for not investing into these things so much like others do. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
xxxGothChickxxx Posted January 23, 2004 Share Posted January 23, 2004 I don't see the need for online relationships....Welp, at least I don't need 'em...I have a boy friend...but I guess for people who can't get them can completely lie about themselves and have one and never know. I really think they're stupid!!! I know 2 people from this board are having one but I'm not going to say who cuz it's well...Because I'm not. K? So, yeah that's my take on this. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Maully Posted January 23, 2004 Share Posted January 23, 2004 [color=green]I would never consider online to be a primary station to meet people. I go online most of the time purely for discussion. Once in a great while I find someone who's opinions and thoughts coincide with my own. I enjoy chatting with them, but most of the time that is all. I do have a small group of internet friends, but rarely, if ever, do they take precidence to my tangible friends here at home. It may be easy to talk to someone online, that also means it's easy to lie to someone online. I may be a 65 year old man for what most of you know. It just takes some common sense. Online friendships are fine. You're not judged by your appearrance, but on the level you speak/type. You can also be selective of who you talk to. Sometimes people can spark a friendship that way. Don't be too hasty though. That's how it is in the long run.[/color] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
James P. Galvatron Posted January 23, 2004 Share Posted January 23, 2004 Online friendships are okay their fun and interesting now online dating thats another story its weird a waste of time and I think you be better off trying to get a real bf or gf just like Molleta said you dont know who u could be talking too. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Create an account or sign in to comment
You need to be a member in order to leave a comment
Create an account
Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!
Register a new accountSign in
Already have an account? Sign in here.
Sign In Now