Boba Fett Posted February 3, 2004 Share Posted February 3, 2004 [QUOTE][i]Originally posted by Shinmaru [/i] [B] You know that Semjaza Azazel guy, the one that everyone hates? The guy just gets on everyone's nerves, doesn't he? I mean, the way he responds to people's inane, useless arguments with well thought out posts and facts is just so irritating! And the guy even has the gall to include the sources of his information so as to seperate fact from fiction! What a cold, heartless bastard, huh? What am I getting at? I'm re-establishing the 'We Hate Semjaza Azazel' Club for Tony haters everywhere! Now the people who send him pointless, awfully written PMs complaining every time he closes a thread or expresses an opinion actually have a place to voice their views! Entry into the club is simple. All you have to do is write a 750 word essay detailing why you hate Semjaza Azazel, while including specific examples of how Tony embarrassed you across the boards. It can surely be done, since Tony seemingly has the time to establish personal vendettas against people he doesn't even know! Also, it would be nice if I could get letters of recommendation from other noted "Tony haters" detailing why you hate Tony enough to be allowed entrance into this prestigious club. Have fun and happy hating, everyone! [/B][/QUOTE] The category moderator Semjaza Azazel has unnecessarily harassed me, like every other law-abiding member of the message board known as ?OtakuBoards?. This sadistic and scarily powerful figure in this small Internet domain spends all of his waking hours plotting to ruin the lives of OtakuBoards members. Among other things, he?s refused to host poorly designed geocities sites, expressed his offensive opinions in the Otaku Lounge and locked perfectly good threads. Let?s take a small look at some of the threads this vile moderator has unnecessarily locked, in clear violation of his power as a moderator. First and foremost is [URL=http://www.otakuboards.com/showthread.php?s=&threadid=36859]Things not to do with food[/URL]. This thought provoking and controversial thread had just begun an engaging discussion of the horrors created when chocolate milk and water are mixed, when Semjaza Azazel closed it. With one stroke of his mod rod, Semjaza had destroyed one of the board?s most promising threads. Only days earlier, the same foul moderator closed the thread [URL=http://www.otakuboards.com/showthread.php?s=&threadid=36837]Cheats For The Sims Bustin Out[/URL]. Not only did this betray his famous hatred for copying and pasting, it also is proof of him using his superior resources to make average members look bad. He provided a link to [URL=http://www.gamefaqs.com/console/ps2/code/36806.html]Game FAQs[/URL]. He used a power that isn?t available to the average person, the search engine, to hunt down this obscure site. He most likely spent hours to make a poor new member of OtakuBoards look stupid. This Semjaza makes Kuja look kind and grandfatherly. The final straw can be found in the Poetry, Fan Fiction and Literature forum. Semjaza waltzed into this sacred house of writing one day and closed the first topic he saw, just for spite. This thread happened to be the epic novel [URL=http://www.otakuboards.com/showthread.php?s=&threadid=35793]Sonic's adventure in Chao World[/URL]. Witty and written with stellar punctuation and grammar, this brilliant Sonic the Hedgehog parody was destined to go far. Semjaza crushed that dream. He closed this thread without a backward glance, ruining any chance of completion for this masterpiece. The above thread closings pale in comparison to the radical opinions expressed by Mr. Azazel in the Otaku Lounge. This guy is clearly nuts. He [URL=http://www.otakuboards.com/showthread.php?s=&postid=551234#post551234]doesn't trust MTV[/URL], [URL=http://www.otakuboards.com/showthread.php?s=&postid=551234#post551234]doubts the honesty of Justin Timberlake[/URL], [URL=http://www.otakuboards.com/showthread.php?s=&postid=551188#post551188]gets his information about Dark Matter from cartoons[/URL], [URL=http://www.otakuboards.com/showthread.php?s=&postid=550729#post550729]would like to cheat drugs companies out of their hard earned profits[/URL] and [URL=http://www.otakuboards.com/showthread.php?s=&postid=550479#post550479]even claims that PETA is insane[/URL]. What a nutter? Semjaza has somehow gotten it into his warped mind that Justin Timberlake meant to rip off part of Janet Jackson?s breastplate during the most recent super bowl halftime show. Imagine, such a good looking, honest and moral young man acting in such a perverted way. Likely? I think not. Semjaza is accusing this man of an outrageous crime of which he has no solid evidence, besides a videotape viewed by millions of people. He also claims that the animal rights group People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals is insane. This is blatantly false. This group stands up for the rights of poor defenseless poodles everywhere. Just because PETA advocates letting animals getting the same rights as human beings, Mr. Azazel labels them insane. These animals aren?t allowed to use the same water fountains as humans, vote or ride on buses. This is clearly wrong and there should be a national movement undertaken to free these creatures from bondage and give them the rights they deserve. Semjaza opposes this righteous action. In his next radical post, the Otaku Gamer moderator stated that he didn?t think that insulin should cost as much as it does. People shouldn?t get drugs they don?t pay for. After all, those drug companies are barely getting by as it is. The pharmaceutical companies deserve to profit from their creations. What will he ask for next, people to stop making pointless posts to raise their post counts? Despite his high and mighty attitude, Semjaza Azazel has no concept of reality. He takes his information from random and inaccurate sources, sometimes cartoons. Recently he stated that he learned everything he ?knows? about dark matter came from a cartoon. This, ladies and gentlemen, is an example of the source quality that Semjaza uses. In closing, I strongly recommend to the administration of OtakuBoards remove this unscrupulous moderator from his position of influence on this message board. During his time here, he has done nothing but harm both this boards reputation and stifle intelligent conversation. His radical opinions have upset many a member of this message board time and time again. He makes a habit of scaring away ?L33T? new members of OB, by using proper grammar. There are even rumors that he runs a website called [URL=http://www.slownerveaction.org/wip/]Wrapped in Plastic[/URL], which contains references to dismemberment! Clearly, Semjaza Azazel must go. In this essay I have shown how, by humiliating the rank and file of OtakuBoards, Semjaza Azazel has invoked my wrath. From the Otaku Lounge, to Music/TV/Movies, within Poetry/Fan Fiction/Literature and even in the Sony Forum, Mr. Azazel has shown himself to be a very nasty person. He goes out of his way to hurt the feelings of random people, the meanie. -Boba Fett [Note: I am currently working on getting endorsements from fellow Semjaza Azazel haters, and will edit in any endorsements I receive] [size=1]Disclaimer: If you haven?t already guessed, this is a joke. I have nothing but the utmost respect for the moderators and administration of OtakuBoards, Semjaza Azazel included.[/size] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shinmaru Posted February 3, 2004 Share Posted February 3, 2004 You are my new hero, Boba. lol Haha, this is the sort of stuff I was hoping for when I added that club into my sig...the whole thing gave me a great laugh, hehe. There are some grammar/spelling mistakes in there, but that doesn't really matter...what matters is that this whole thing was damned funny lol. Consider yourself member numero uno of the club, even without the recommendations :p Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sara Posted February 5, 2004 Share Posted February 5, 2004 [size=1]Boba, you dork! I was going to do this first. *seethes* I'd still do it, but dang...it would be hard to top this. Heh...brilliant. I loved reading it. *laughs softly*[/size] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lea Posted February 5, 2004 Share Posted February 5, 2004 [COLOR=blue]I found it highly amusing ^_^ I wonder why this...Tony monster hasn't been stopped before. His dastardly deeds have been gone unchecked long enough! *forms a riot*[/COLOR] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gavin Posted February 5, 2004 Share Posted February 5, 2004 [size=1]I only looked at this thread because I thought that Boba had gone nuts and was looking for some way to get banned and go down in flame and glory. It's a very good read Boba, highly humourous, the bit about the Dark Matter was good since I too posted in that thread. It just proves that fact that people who do their jobs well will pay for it in the end.[/size] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Baron Samedi Posted February 7, 2004 Share Posted February 7, 2004 Haha. I loved that Boba. I was thinking of doing one, but I might leave it. Anyhow, excellent work there. You really made me hate Semjaza. My blood will hereon boil at the mere mention of his name. Great work. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
amibasuki Posted February 9, 2004 Share Posted February 9, 2004 [FONT=arial]and to think that I've been under his sinful, brainwashing influence for so long that I never saw him for what he [i]really[/i] was. until now. you've just saved a life today, Boba Fett.[/FONT] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
James P. Galvatron Posted February 9, 2004 Share Posted February 9, 2004 I thank you Boba I would never have had the guts, sheer stupidty, and wit to do what you just did. I salute you yes Semjaza has gotten on my nerves to with his witty remarks his background checks always having the information. Coming to threads and areas he doesn't belong acting like a smarty saying the information we gave out was wrong and correcting us and giving us a proof that we are wrong. For your bravery Boba Fett I thank You. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Artemis Posted February 9, 2004 Share Posted February 9, 2004 Wow, that was incredibly hilarious! When I first saw the thread title, I was a little disturbed, but this is one of the funniest things I've read in a long time. I'd like to see what Semjaza himself thinks of your outstanding essay. Quite honestly, it helped me gain a better appreciation for all of our mods. ;) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Isen`tar Posted February 9, 2004 Share Posted February 9, 2004 Ah no! The humanity! A mod doing his job! Stop him quickly! *runs away screaming into the night* Idiot l33ters... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
vegeta rocker Posted February 10, 2004 Share Posted February 10, 2004 *bow incesstantly* awesome man, i was actually wondering if it was a joke. But then i clicked the sonic link and all became shockingly clear. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bio Posted February 11, 2004 Share Posted February 11, 2004 [font=tahoma][size=1]It really is a shame that it's necessary to put that disclaimer... Oh well, it was still hilarious. How dare Semjaza Azazel insult the [strike]infidelity[/strike] intelligence of Justin Timberlake?! He is a [strike]pedifile[/strike] valued member of society! He only wishes for [strike]adultery[/strike] wholesome programming for all viewers.[/font][/size] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Boba Fett Posted February 11, 2004 Author Share Posted February 11, 2004 [COLOR=green]I felt it necessary to include the disclaimer because, as most of you are well aware, there are some people who tend to miss subtle humor time and time again. Examples of this can be found wherever wrist cutter posts. Therefore, I felt it prudent to include this disclaimer to avoid irrelevant comments that would create spam. I'd also like to thank everyone for the kind comments. I really appreciate it when people respond to my work in such a positive manner. I'll have to write random essays more often...[/COLOR] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lady Asphyxia Posted February 19, 2004 Share Posted February 19, 2004 [font=Verdana][size=1]What I find humerous [apart from the humour in the essay] is that most of the links have now been deleted with the coming of V7. *grins* And the fact that you backed up your claims of Tony's horrible use of evidence with evidence struck me as incredibly funny. [/size][/font] [font=Verdana][size=1]Well done, again, [strike]Dragon Warrior[/strike] Boba. ^_^" Funny and well placed humour, hee. [/size][/font] [font=Verdana][size=1][/size][/font] [font=Verdana][size=1][b]EDIT -- [/b]*blushes* Whoops! Sorry, Boba. Must've gotten a little mixed up there along the way.[/size][/font] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Warlock Posted February 19, 2004 Share Posted February 19, 2004 [quote name='Lady Asphyxia][font=Verdana][size=1]What I find humerous [apart from the humour in the essay] is that most of the links have now been deleted with the coming of V7. *grins*[/size'][/font][/quote] You noticed it too, huh? *snicker* But that is a prime example of a humorous essay. And seeing as there's nothing bad I can find to say about it, all I can do is give you two thumbs up. It gave me a good laugh, and in the end, that's all that counts. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Break Posted February 19, 2004 Share Posted February 19, 2004 [font=arial][color=#CC0000][size=2]Did I miss something? oO[/size][/color][/font] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shinmaru Posted February 19, 2004 Share Posted February 19, 2004 [quote name='Break][font=arial][color=#CC0000][size=2]Did I miss something? oO[/size][/color'][/font][/quote] Heh, just to give a recap (because it's no longer in my signature lol), this essay came about because of a 'I Hate Semjaza Azazel' club that I had in my signature a couple weeks back. Basically, it was a silly club that had crazy requirements for membership and Boba is the only one who bothered to do anything :p Though, mostly the blurb in my sig served to poke fun at the dorks who complain about him. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lady Macaiodh Posted February 19, 2004 Share Posted February 19, 2004 [COLOR=DarkSlateBlue]This is not funny. I already had a heart attack yesterday. If I can't... stop laughing... I will have... another one... I'm not kidding... help... somebody call 911... Know worry darling.. They are just jealous of your overwhelming beauty...[/COLOR] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NorykoAngelcry Posted February 19, 2004 Share Posted February 19, 2004 [QUOTE=Lady Macaiodh][COLOR=DarkSlateBlue]This is not funny. I already had a heart attack yesterday. If I can't... stop laughing... I will have... another one... I'm not kidding... help... somebody call 911... Know worry darling.. They are just jealous of your overwhelming beauty...[/COLOR][/QUOTE] [COLOR=darkred][SIZE=1]Pulls out defibrillator. . CLEAR!! This is one of the funniest posts I have read in quite some time. . nothing like stopping that evil Semjaza >_< I, like Sara, was planning on posting something. . but I don't think I could intelligently bash on someone that I really don't know at all! lol Oh well, I am happy just laughing at Boba's essay ^_^[/SIZE][/COLOR] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Boba Fett Posted February 19, 2004 Author Share Posted February 19, 2004 [QUOTE=Lady Asphyxia][font=Verdana][size=1]What I find humerous [apart from the humour in the essay] is that most of the links have now been deleted with the coming of V7. *grins* And the fact that you backed up your claims of Tony's horrible use of evidence with evidence struck me as incredibly funny. [/size][/font] [font=Verdana][size=1]Well done, again, Dragon Warrior. ^_^" Funny and well placed humour, hee. [/size][/font][/QUOTE] [color=green]Thanks to all for the kind comments. As for the now shattered links that pervade my post, I can?t find most of the threads in question. They seem to have been deleted from the archive, or are buried deep within it. I guess you?ll have to use your imaginations. One last thing. I?m Boba. Don?t forget that Lady Asphy.[/color] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Semjaza Posted March 27, 2004 Share Posted March 27, 2004 I know this is rather old at this point, but I thought I posted in here and tonight I realized I actually didn't. I wanted to just say that I really enjoyed the application. I wonder if anyone else even bothered to send one in to Shinmaru lol. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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