ChibiHorsewoman Posted April 19, 2004 Share Posted April 19, 2004 [color=darkviolet]Infact, I didn't even write this one, but I want to know what you think of this, then I'll tell you who wrote it: [center]I feel you slipping away like the sand in an hourglass Do you think it's fair that you may not be there to share the life you've helped me build? I have changed this I know Yet you stand by me still all the love that we've shared but nothing could prepare me For the sudden realization that hit me not so long ago Ground away and eroded The walls are crumbling down Love is crying itself to sleep passing away without a sound Ground away and eroded giving up without protest or sound Love is fading away Love is fading away I've built it all around you, but are you all that's true? Is my search really over, or has it just begun? Should I take a stand or just walk away? Help me make up my mind should I go or should I stay? Ground away and eroded the walls are crumbling down love is crying itself to sleep on a clear and moonlit night. I twist and turn in my bed thoughts of you in my head. Is love fading away? Is love fading away? I hear your voice on the phone, and I don't feel so alone anymore.[/center][/color] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chocobo Gene Posted April 27, 2004 Share Posted April 27, 2004 It's a good poem, I'd like to konw who it is by, I really like the bits of repitition on it, it really gives the feeling that this person has a feeling of emptyness, and has a feeling of love for some one The phrase at the end is very effective, it caps of the poem very well, and this is where I believe it comes into true light, the person is lonley, and wants to escape and this phone call, maybe symbalic, is a sign for this person, that things arw changing, and that they have some hope. In total it is really a good poem, and i would like to know who wrote it, it has really peacked my interest, well gotta go, I hope to hear more of you Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ChibiHorsewoman Posted April 28, 2004 Author Share Posted April 28, 2004 [color=darkviolet]I'm amazed that someone actually finally reviewed this poem. The author is my husband and he wrote this during AIT in Ft. Gordon GA back in 2001 prior to our engagement. I guess at that time he was confused or something. I don't know he doesn't liek to talk about stuff liek that. Maybe it's because he's a guy. But I'm glad you liked it.[/color] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chocobo Gene Posted April 28, 2004 Share Posted April 28, 2004 Indeed, this poem was probaly one of the best I have read in a long time, it is much better than poems I have read before, by profesionals, I think your husband should be proud, it is really full of passion. I can actually now see more into this poem, now the bottom part of this poem, It could represent you, before he meet you, and you helped him away, like the line"Ground away and eroded, The walls are crumbling down" that may represent his love for you. Thank you for putting this up, and telling me who wrote it, I really hope you will be able to put others up, or even one's you write yourself Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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