Man problems...help!

[Avalon]

[color=darkorchid]Ok people, here's the story. Yesterday, my fiance called up his ex/first love/friend Katrina to talk. See, they haven't kept in touch for a while so he needed to talk to her...to tell her about our engagement and all. Well, he got her on the phone and they talked...for hours. I mean, he didn't call me back like he said he would!

Anyway, I had to go to the hospital yesterday for...well, never you mind. While there, I called him...and asked how she was doing. "Peachy," he said. I just laughed. Then I asked him if he told her about EVERYTHING. He said that he just told a little bit...so I'm guessing that he didn't tell her about the engagement, which made me a little angry...and a little supicious(sp?).

Then, oh my goddess then, he told me that they were going to hang out downtown tomorrow(which is today). Outwardly, I was like "OK..." Inwardly, I was like, "F---!!!" I mean, this girl still loves him...and he still loves her...so I became even more supicious. I hung up after saying my goodbyes and left the hospital hours later.

I told my mom about this....situation, and she basically said the same thing I said: "She's trying to take your man." Now, I know that might sound like I'm pushing it, but believe me, I've been in this EXACT situation before...and lets just say that I lost the guy, ok.

Anyway, I called him up and told my feeling about this situation: "Point blank, I don't trust her." Then I asked him if any of his old feelings came back, cause I had a feeling that they did...and I was right. So I'm really worried at this point of time. Then he tells me that he was fighting his feelings...now when he said that, I just wanted(and still want) to call off the engagement. But then he said that he loved me more...'well, if that were true, these "feelings" wouldn't still exist,' which is what I told myself. I told him that if those "feelings" get any stronger, he might want to tell me...cause I'm gonna step out the way.

I mean, I know damn well I can't match to that girl. To him, that girl couldn't do no wrong. I mean, that's his first love for goddess' sakes! They've been dating each other for years! I've only dated him for a couple of months, even though I was his friend for 5 years. I mean, right now I just have the strongest feeling that I'm going to lose him to her. I mean, I wouldn't be surprised if I did, you know?

Well, now they are at Downtown Atlanta doing...eachother or whatever, I don't know. But I'm serious...if he comes back and tells me that he cheated on me like he did last time(yes, he cheated while we were dating), it's over! Iif any of you could give me some advice, I would really appreciate it...[/color]

[Balinese]

[FONT=Comic Sans MS].........

you know he cheated on you while you were dating. yet you held on to him?

i made that mistake with my ex-fiance, and it was the stupidest thing i ever did, because he continued to cheat on me for two more months.

my advice: as hard as it may seem, DUMP THE DONKEY. (well, thinking a more impolite word :p, but you get my drift, i hope). not to be mean about it, but taking him back was like saying, 'go on, cheat on me, i really don't care'. call off the engagement, say goodbye, and find yourself a man who isn't a total jerk.

you are worth more than this. and you don't deserve a man cheating on you because he's "fighting his feelings" for his ex. believe me.

Balinese[/FONT]

[Guest Spike88]

[FONT=Impact]I may be a 16 year old guy sitting around with nothing to do but hey I know a few things and if this guy is going to hangout with and ex then there is something wrong. My gf would totally kick my butt if I even suggested it. I wouldn't of even been allowed to go especially with me still semiliking the other girl. Anyways my advice is you need to talk to him seriously about this. If he really loves you he won't have feelings for her end of story thats how it is supposed to work.[/FONT]

[ChibiHorsewoman]

[color=darkviolet]Okay, I'm not any type of psychiatrist, but let me get this straight.

The main point in this story is that you're having some serious doubts about this guy who you're supposed to be marrying in how long? And he's been keeping in touch with his ex for how long? And he's cheated on you and you know about it, but you stayed with him. I don't know about you, but shouldn't your sixth sense be telling you that something is not quite right?

The guy sounds like a bit of a slime ball and that's not something you really want to wind up spending the rest of your life with unless you want to be a guest on the Jerry Springer show. Not a goal in my life, but then I'm not you.

One thing you may want to do before you call the whole engagement off is talk to your fiance about your concerns. I had real fun doing that prior to my wedding. My husband decided to tell me that the crazy lady who lives in teh same apartment building as his mother was also a ******** partner of his who he got pregnant, but she had a misscarriage. That's why she doesn't seem to care for me too much, never mind the fact that one of her kids is his cousin. Yeah, that was fun. but even so, you have to ask those kinds of questions.

Still, if you get those answers and still want to go through with it, may I suggest instead a year and a day handfasting to see if he'd be willing to stay faithful to you instead of going all out on a ceromony? This could work for the best in the long run.

Of course, if you really want to know my true feelings I'd say kick him to the curb girlfriend. But that's just ghetto me talking.[/color]

[HOTpage2004]

It's called love, I'm guessing you already guessed that, but in any relationship, theres problems. Think of it this way, if you broke up, you would stiill love him deep inside and he'll still love you, whenever two people are dating and than break up, they still can be friends. Like my big bro (total hotty for hot girls) he had relationships and broke up with them, and when he finnaly got engaged, he thought of one of these girls and needed to talk to her, so he called her up and they spent time with each other, and all it made him realize was how much he needed the girl he was engaged to. Now he's married to that girl and has a little boy. You can never forget someone you loved so much. Sometimes you just need someone else to talk to. But if you find out that he is cheating on you, kick him in the a**! :smirk:

[NeoNabishen]

[FONT=Fixedsys][SIZE=2][COLOR=Blue]Number one, you can love more then one person at any given time. Trust me it happens to guys all the time. If he is in love with you and her then the only thing you can hope for is that he will chose one of you and then stick by his decision. But since he cheated on you one, I would not trust him.
Number two, all guys are not all bad, but given the chance most guys will do something stupid. Does that make sense? You should trust the man that you are going to marry. I don’t think you can trust this guy, if he did it once he WILL do it again.
So my advice
Dump the guy, cry once and then move on.Or hit him with a hammer :bash: Or end your relationship with a bang :blowup:
Ok maybe the authorities wouldn’t like that one.
But know matter what happens don't let him give you the idea that all men are cheating losers. Some of us are good guys.
If you really love him don’t give up, but sometimes you have to cut your loses.[/FONT][/SIZE][/COLOR]