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Comedy Line YAll


Guest Pikeon
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Attention everyone I am teh director of this scene and whats happening is this:
anyone with previous comedy experience is eligible to post comedy in this t hread. all comedy is allowed certain comedy is prohibited (Ethnic insults, Certain Races also include,bad words such as the wrong word for an african american , nothing insulting )
Im going to start off
A husband, wife and their small daughter visit a nudist camp.
As they walk into the camp, the little girl is all wide-eyed. "Mummy, there are ladies here with bigger boobs than yours!" she exclaims.

Her mother replies, "The bigger they are the dumber they are."

The daughter goes on, "There are men here with bigger penises than Daddy's!"

Her mother replies again, "The bigger they are the dumber they are."

The little girl goes out to play, but a short time later she's back. "Mummy," she asks, "Is dumbness contagious like a cold?"

Her mother replies, "Why on earth would you think that dumbness is contagious?"

The girl answers, "Well, Daddy's talking to the dumbest lady I've ever seen, and the longer they talk the dumber he gets!"
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A completely inebriated man walked into a bar and, after staring for some time at the only woman seated at the bar, walked over to her, placed his hand up her skirt and began fondling her. She jumped up and slapped him silly. He immediately apologized and explained, "I'm sorry. I thought you were my wife. You look exactly like her." "Why you drunken, worthless, insufferable *******!" she screamed. "Funny," he muttered, "you even sound exactly like her."
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One day, a little girl was sitting and watching her mother do the dishes at the kitchen sink. She suddenly noticed that her mother had several strands of white hair sticking out in contrast to her brunette hair.
The little girl looked at her mother and inquisitively asked, "Why are some of your hairs white, Mom?"

Her mother replied, "Well, every time you do something wrong and make me cry or unhappy, one of my hairs turns white."

The little girl thought about this revelation for a while and then asked, "Momma, how come all of grandma's hairs are white?"
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you want jokes huh?

three men just died in a car crash, the were all standing at the pearly gates when st. peter asked them what they would like their familys to say about them at their funeral, the first guy said "I want them to say I was an intelegent and wonderful man and That I was good to every body"
the second man said "I want them to say that I was tallented and that I was a wonderfull father and husband."
the third man said "I want them to say......LOOK HE'S MOVING!!!!!!"

Want more just ask........
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Hah :whoops: I just now rqlized it I meant to put this in the General Discussion room.

3 men were going to be put in the deat hsentce . Threre were three deaths, gas chamber, Poison, and HIV injection
The first that was up asked if he could have the
Posion. He died later
The second man asked if he could have the gas chamber.
He said "hey whats that smell" and then he died
The third man was up he asked for HIV injection
The third man was injected and started laughing
The executor said "Why are you laughing"
the third man replied "hah hah I fooled you Im weraing a Condom
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Ok here's one.....

A lady was standing in line at a store getting ready to purchase a product from the store, when all of a sudden a drunk stumbled up behind her. She noticed that the man was staring right at her. she asked "Can I help you?"
the drunk replied "Are you single?"
the lady answered "Why yes I am. Why do you ask?"
the drunk says "Cause you're ugly as $h!T!!":laugh:
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OK. Here's one my sis told me.

There was a man that was in his bed about ready to die. His wife was beside him. The old man said, "Honey, you've always been at my side. When I lost my job, you were at my side. When we lost our son, you were at my side. When we had nothing to eat, you were at my side. Do you want to know what I think?"
the wife replies, "What?" *tears strolling down her face.*
The man says, "I think you're bad luck!!!" :laugh:
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