Jump to content
OtakuBoards

is love real?


Guest Mimi
 Share

Recommended Posts

Do you belive in love? I mean what is it? How can we tell when we fall in love and how do we go about expressing it?
Link to comment
Share on other sites

[quote name='Mimi']Do you belive in love? I mean what is it? How can we tell when we fall in love and how do we go about expressing it?[/quote]


i have no idea... im really too young to try to fall in luv (13) but i thought i was once.. until the guy broke ^ with me for my best friend :( . so idunno. im in the same boat ur in :confused:
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Yeah, I believe in it. I have never experienced it personally, but I know it exists. As for how you know...well, you will when it happens. Expressing it...well, like feeling it, you just know how to do it. Its an instinct, it comes naturally. We have all just forgotten how to do it. Until "They" show up, you probably will never know true love.
Link to comment
Share on other sites

I, personally, don't believe in true love. Plus, there's a fine line between love and lust (for the love of the opposite gender). Anyway, I think there is many ways you can express love- family love, friend love, etc. (Heck, maybe there's even enemy love. But that's just me). Falling in love is extremely hard to figure out. There's many sides to it, like as falling in love for the right reasons and such. But then again, you could probably find it in someone you least expected. Love, in one word, is bemusing. *Shrugs*
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Eli has a valid point when it comes to love and lust. That is why I am not a big fan of love at first sight, but it still can be possible. First sight is a physical attraction and if we are physically attracted to someone there is one thing that we are thinking about and its not I want to be in a committment with you.
I do think love is real. You just have to discern certain things. These may be different with different people but I think we all would know when the time is right. I was once in love. It was with a girl who I had known for most of my life and we were good friends. It was after a one month stretch after really hanging out with her I got hooked. You know when you are in love because its like a drug that you can't get enough of. Real love is attainable but it is really easy to fall in the lust trap so be careful.
Link to comment
Share on other sites

[color=darkviolet]Love is one of those strange experiances that has to be had for each individual and it's different for each individual.

Besides, what kind of love are we talking about becasue tehre are quite a few different types.

For exampe: I love my mom, but not the same way I love my husband. And I love my cat, but it's not the same kind of love I have for my best friend.

Infact, implying that the love I have for my cat is equal to the love I have for my best friend who I have not only known for a longer period of time, but who has offered emotional support in quite a few life crisises cheapens the friendship.

Also, implying that I love my mom teh same way I love my husband has this nasty incestrous cloud around it.

But I would say that everyone has experianced some definition of love even if it was one sided.[/color]
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Of course there are different types of love. Philios (brotherly love/friends), eros (sexual/romantic love), storge (innate/instinct/love for a child) and agape (spiritual love).

I discuss eros love at my website in a blog entitled "Warning - Excessive Stupidity" [[url]http://www.smallprint.co.nr][/url] (sorry for the plug, I thought it was appropriate x_x)

Other than that I haven't much to say because I fell all those types of love. Eros is the one which is confusing me a lot lately because I can honestly say I love my boyfriend (in the sense that he is someone whose company I enjoy and I like what he has to say and who he is) and I do feel a sexual and romantic bond, but I don't think it is a firm and deep set love. I guess we're only just scratching the surface cause I refuse to believe we are deep within a passionate relationship three and a half months down the line :]
Link to comment
Share on other sites

that's a very loaded question really, love is so wide and encompassing a word that has so many meaning you might as well be deciphering the meaning of life through the dictionary...

In a purely analytical way of speaking, I would say love is an positive emotion emitted by our body's chemsitry, it is the next step up from liking someone (or REALLY liking someone) and can range from anything like love of kin, to love of spouse or love of particular object or subject or even life in general.

The particular love that I think you're referring to is the type of love of two mutually attracted conecntual adult, if you don't believe that this type of love exist, then you have a good chance of never considering lifelong companion since when you're old and crummy and cranky and snappish, who else but your spouse and your offspring would enjoy your company and intimacy (and not that way) but the one you love?

Being in love is something that can't be proxied, love happens, just as sorrow or hatred, everyone has a different way of expressing it, everyone has a different way of feeling it... if need the ask what love is, then you've most likely never felt it.
Link to comment
Share on other sites

[color=darkblue]Of course love is real. In fact, I'd go so far as to say love is a tangible force to be reckoned with. I've certainly never felt or experienced anything like it.

One day, when I'm a physicist, I'm going to find out if it can be measured and studied, if it is a quantum force, like light. I'm almost positive it can. Something like [i]chi.[/i] Either way, it seems to be some type of force, rather than just a feeling. How else can you explain why so many people have done so many crazy things in the name of it?

I think that people experienced this [i]thing,[/i] and they felt it, so they called it a feeling, just like you feel energy, even though energy is really a force, and they needed to come up with a name for it, so they called it love. But there's really much more to it. Just my opinion.

As for expressing it, if you're sure, just tell the person. It's nothing to be ashamed of. People need to learn to love for the sake of loving, not for being loved in return. Simple as that.[/color]
Link to comment
Share on other sites

There is definitely such a thing as love. Just because something is human, doesn't mean that either it doesn't exist, it's purely a result of chemicals anyway, or it's some kind of ideal that can't be reached.

The problem with love is that very often it can't be found in most of the places we look.

Often we assume that if we love somebody, we will love them straight away, and we will always love them constantly, and if not then it is not "true love". Whereas in reality love is something best built upon. Love isn't about a perfect relationship of any sort- but one which can mould, and most importantly, one where both people grow and are molded together and grow closer through it.

So really, the question is not "is love real" as an emotion but "is "quick-fix love" real". That is, the concept that we seem to have that two people can just fall in love and stay in love and have a perfect relationship, because well, they're in love. Is that real? No. And most importantly, that is [b]not[/b] love, it [b]is[/b] lust. Lust doesn't have to be purely sex-oriented. You can lust over money, over posessions, over anything. In this case, the lust is for a relationship- and the reason that it is lust is simply because you want all the good things in a relationship, but you don't want to have to have the pain of building on what you have. You want it all now, you don't want to still be getting there in 10 years time.

People who have been in very long term relationships will tell you that it takes a great number of years- the problem is that as a society we aren't willing to commit to that kind of length of time any more, and we certainly don't want to wait for "love" to appear in the relationship- we want it now.

And of course, nobody gets it instantly. What they do have from sheer novelty value fades soon and they wonder where the love went- where actually all they were really focussed on was lust, and lust never holds out for long when you actually have what you've been lusting over.

So many have been brought to the conclusion that love is fake- that it doesn't last, all that kind of crap, whereas in actuality they never really found it.


There are other types of love of course- but they all need building on. You don't instantly hit it off as friends with somebody, and your family has to invest a lot of love into you in order to build that love up too. As for the spiritual love- that grows too! The main problem is that in practically all cases, people expect that if there is love, then it is instant and perfect love, and this is never the case.
Link to comment
Share on other sites

[size=1][color=darkgreen][i]"Love is when you are attracted to someone who has a certain DNA pattern that is similar to your own. The pattern originally comes from your parents and they mix to create your own. When someone you meet or know has a DNA pattern similar to your own, you will be attracted to them."[/i]

That is the scientific formula to explain love (I heard it on the news a year ago, so i don't remember it that much). I think there isn't any "explanation" for love (Crazy scientists). I agree with Dan L about love taking time to grow, it just seems impossible to love someone as soon as you see them when don't know there name or a thing about them.

Family love is a bit different in my oppinion. I think you somehow automatically love your parents (I mean the ones who live in your house, not the aunts, cousins, ect.) sense they have been with you sense you were a baby. It might have taken time to build the love up, but we sertainly don't remember it.

I think friendship Love is the hardest to get to because you don't know how the person acts when you first meet them and there isn't really any trust between you and the person. [/size][/color]
Link to comment
Share on other sites

[quote name='Quad']"Love is when you are attracted to someone who has a certain DNA pattern that is similar to your own. The pattern originally comes from your parents and they mix to create your own. When someone you meet or know has a DNA pattern similar to your own, you will be attracted to them."[/quote]

Doesn't science also say "opposites attract"?
Link to comment
Share on other sites

[quote name='wrist cutter']Doesn't science also say "opposites attract"?[/quote]

No, that's an old wive's tale. I, personally, believe that love exists, but don't believe in most adages relating to love, like "opposites attract" and "love at first sight".
Link to comment
Share on other sites

[size=1]People can grow on you or people can have instant attraction. You can probably not love someone at first sight, but you can grow to love someone. You'll know when you're in love. I could tell you all that crapola about "always looking for them", "special things for them", "your knees go weak", etc. But, you should already know it. And it isn't necessarily love either.

I have never.... been in what I wold consider mature love. If you're in love, you'll know it. Easy as that.[/size]
Link to comment
Share on other sites

I'd have to say over all I believe in love. I definitely don't believe in love at first sight, you have to know someone before you can actually come anywhere near loving them. You won't necessarily know it if you are though, it can be very confusing and hazy sometimes. I often think I'm in love with my girlfriend, but then other times I think I just really like her. But then again I thought I was in love with my last gf but now I look at it and I know I wasn't. I don't believe in all that similar DNA crap and scientific explanations to love, that's just something that can't be scientifically proven. I do think opposites can attract, but nobody is completely opposite to someone else. I think me and my girlfriend are very very different but not opposite, for love to work you have to have some compatability and things in common. I doubt I'm really the best person to be giving advice on love though. I haven't been completely in love yet, close, but not quite there. Love is different for everybody so you have to figure it out yourself, that's the best advice I can say regarding the issue. Well, I guess those who don't know teach....right?
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Put it this way, Love really is hard to explain to people in words, but it is sort of a feeling that needed a name. A force that happens to draw two together. It may be "chemical Results" but I don't believe so. love is when you have to build relationships, it doesn't happen straight away. It is a goal that many people go after that we slowly mold over time. If you want it right then, then it is indeed lust. It has to be built upon, and not very many people want to, because it takes a while to do that. WE have to cautiously slip away the covers that pile upon what we think is love. That is where humanity draws the line. They begin thinking there is no love that can be shared mentally, so then happens what we call lust. After a while, we get bored, and want nothing more to do with what we lusted for once we have it.

Think about it, even if you think you hated your mother, why did you stay with her when you got angry? Didn't you eventually get back in touch? Thats a different type of love than what i'm speaking of, but it has the idea i'm tring to place down. There is a bond that you can't get rid of that draws you to one another. People who want it right away, or even think it, are wrong to think that way- for there is no possible way, except in fairy tales. Even then those are only fairy tales, just stories in ones mind.

Or you could say this, There are thousands of ways to love someone, Between boy and girl, mother and child, Between friends, and a rare occasion of being between teacher and student. No matter what way, as long as love is there, all you want is to be with that person, to talk to them, to share feelings......just to be around them. Sometimes love might make you do somthing you'll regret or put yourself in danger, but it also gives you strength, knowing you can see that someone again or that you're keeping them safe will give you strength beyond your wildest dreams....because you're protecting Love, the feeling inside of you too. But possibly the most wonderful thing about love is when you love someone, no matter what they say to you or what they do will keep you from loving them. Love is unconditional. Whatever happens, whether they hate you or try to hurt you, you'll love them. Even you might do things you'll regret, but in the end nothing will keep you from them......because love is the flame the never dies. A feeling that it will be alright if you have a litle fight, or a misunderstanding. The strongest bond you can find in anyone.

If you want a more clear derinition, I would ask someone you know, who has been "in love" for many years, like great-grandparents, or someone you know who is honestly in love, not lusting. Dan L has a good explanation. I'm never very good with explanations am I?
Link to comment
Share on other sites

I believe in love, but not in 'love at first sight'. I just find that all too 'convenient' to me. And lusty, not true love.

I don't think I've ever fallen in love...but I have felt a strong effection for someone. That feeling...was like a pit in my chest and something was caught... I believe love is greater than that, so I can only imagine and hope.

I think when you find that special someone, you will know. You'll get that [I]feeling[/I] and it'll hurt to be away from them...

Well. At least that's what I expect. That's what I felt when I had that strong effection for _______. [SIZE=1]I refuse to reveal his name. meh......[/SIZE]
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Guest lavalamp
[QUOTE=Sarangeyo]I believe in love, but not in 'love at first sight'. I just find that all too 'convenient' to me. And lusty, not true love.

I don't think I've ever fallen in love...but I have felt a strong effection for someone. That feeling...was like a pit in my chest and something was caught... I believe love is greater than that, so I can only imagine and hope.

I think when you find that special someone, you will know. You'll get that [I]feeling[/I] and it'll hurt to be away from them...

Well. At least that's what I expect. That's what I felt when I had that strong effection for _______. [SIZE=1]I refuse to reveal his name. meh......[/SIZE][/QUOTE]

Your description ["...was like a pit in my chest"] is really on target and that's what I personally always thought love felt like. I've experienced it before and it's a pretty amazing albeit crippling feeling.

It's like a notch from being nauseated so if that's not love then I don't want to fall in love.
Link to comment
Share on other sites

I'm only halfway through 15, and I can't say I've experienced real love. There's been times when I thought I was, and then one time when I thought it was gonna be forever (what the hell...), but I wasn't.

It messes you up. I makes you think things, makes you think things all weird. And it takes me ages to realise it. I wish it didn't but I guess I got a softspot somewhere hey.

I believe in 'true love', but it takes more than a few weeks or a girlfriend here and there to get into it.
Link to comment
Share on other sites

[quote name='Mimi']Do you belive in love? I mean what is it? How can we tell when we fall in love and how do we go about expressing it?[/quote]

Love is like when you are listening to a song that is playing in another room, and you are singing along, and then a train goes by blocking out the song, but you keep singing and when you hear it again, you are in perfect time like you were before. That's love.

And that's how it is with me and ____
Link to comment
Share on other sites

[quote name='Mimi']Do you belive in love? I mean what is it? How can we tell when we fall in love and how do we go about expressing it?[/quote]
[Size=1]
I suppose that there are alot of answers to those questions. They all really depend on whether or not you really beleive in love. I, don't beleive in love. Love is Hormones from one person reacting to hormons in another person, I'd say.

But If you're a believer in love, the answers would be. Love is life, you can tell your in love because you can't wait to see this person, and when you finally do, your heart does this little flip flop type thing, and you don't feel complete without them. I don't think there is any certain way to express feelings, everyone does it differently, Just go with what you feel.[/size]
Link to comment
Share on other sites

There is no such thing as love in the sense everyone is talking about.

These feelings are basicly composed of lust mixed with infatuation.

It is all instinctive, to make the species survive.
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Guest
This topic is now closed to further replies.
 Share

×
×
  • Create New...