Sex-Why?

[DeathBug]

[color=indigo][size=1][font=comic sans ms]Can someone please explain to me [i]hy[/i] so many people are spending so much time and effort to try and have sex? What, exactly, is the great appeal? I'm speaking mostly of promiscuious or casual sex, but not because of any moral standings. Let's look at it as a matter of common sense.

Possible/Probable results of sex:

*Physical health complications (Diseases, infections, etc.)

*Emotional complications (Oh, the drama)

*Potential legal and financial complications

*Pregnancy (If you're heterosexual, and pregnancy leads to a whole host of other problems.)

Ah, and a sexually active friend of mine, when hearing my opinion, told me that I "wouldn't understand" until I had sex, and that "it wasn't as simple" as I was making it sound.

Well, gee, after actually having sex, none of the above potential problems go away; ergo, we can add another possible complication resulting from having sex.

*Inability to remain rational regarding sex (?)

Granted, if you're with a single partner, whom you know is clean and you share a healthy emotional relationship with, then the dangers of health and emotional complications decrease. And, if you're a homosexual, the risk of pregnancy doesn't exist. (However, statistically, if you're a homosexual male, premiscuous sex is almost three times as likely to result in health complications as a result of disease.)

So, if you're with a partner you share a healthy relationship with and whom you trust, and are prepared to deal with the possibility of pregnancy, then sex is okay for you.

However, so many people having sex, not even using condoms, don't consider any of the consequences of their actions. They put their entire future on the line to feel good for a few minutes. Are these people just stupid, or oblivious to what they're doing? I understand that some people have emotional complications that drive them to seek intimate encounters, but surely that can't account for all the people having reckless and promiscuious sex. Can it?

Am I missing something here?[/color][/size][/font]

[ChibiHorsewoman]

[color=darkviolet]Damned if I know why everyone seems to want to go and have sex. The whole thing is like a double edged sword. If you don't have sex there's all this pressure to have sex. And if you have sex there's this pressure not to have sex.

On one hand you get this big stigma about being a virgin. If you're a virgin, suddenly you're not attractive enough to get laid. Or you're prudish, stuck up, a tease (if all you do is make out) or a multitude of other names and catergories. Heck, if you're a guy and you don't have sex suddenly you're gay even if you're just so shy around girls you won't even talk to your friend's wife. It's gotten so bad for virgins that some of them actually make up stories about getting laid to make themselves look good.

Then there's all the names catergories and double standards of having pre-marital or extra curricular sex. If a girl goes and has sex with more than one guy she's a slut, or a whore, or easy, or some other lovely words that girls will call other girls for being promiscuous. But heck a guy can do the same thing and he's a stud, and cool, and he gets lucky. Is it any wonder some people become born again virgins?

Some other reasons people have sex:

*[b]To prove that their attractive.[/b]-Like telling the world- look someone wanst me!

*[b]Boredum[/b]-Self explanitory

*[b]Curiousity[/b]-Well, I haven't slept with this person yet. Let's see how they are.

*[b]Love[/b]-Not always together with sex, but if you're in a relationship that can work.

*[b]Pure and simple enjoyment[/b]-Either you've gone long enough (five months and counting) or your libido just got really reved up, or heck he/she's good looking enough I [i]probably[/i] won't have a gag reflex when I wake up next to him/her in the morning . Or heck, it's better than watching Buffalo lose [b][i]again[/i][/b]. Besides, just because your football team can't score doesn't mean you won't! :devil:

I honestly don't know why so many people are suddenly going around having unprotected sex without condoms or even birth control. Some of the smartest people I know are proving that they lack intelligence by doing this. I'm like, well if he won't put on a condom, why don't you? They make them for women now!

No, DB. I don't think you're really missing anything. Some people just have more restraint than others, simple as that.[/color]

[Balmon]

Chibi hit on a number of great points - but possibly missed a terribly important one: truth be told - many people just have large quantities of sex because they enjoy it. I mean, can anyone of you HONESTLY tell me what rushes can beat that of sex?

And please, let's not get too esoteric here... I mean, I'm a musician, so I know the highs of art and what-have-you, but in the end, the Id (thanks a TON, Freud), coupled with biology (see HORNINESS) gets the better of some people, and they just can't help but want to get it.

Weak? Sure. Human? Definitely. Stupid? Probably

Simple, enough? I think so.

Phil

EDIT: I completely agree with the post below me.

[Semjaza]

I have no real idea why some people will just randomly have sex with pretty much anyone willing to do it. I know people like this and I won't pretend to even understand it.

Sex is incredibly enjoyable, but I find that sticking with the same person is more than good enough for me.

[Hevn]

[QUOTE=ChibiHorsewoman][color=darkviolet]And if you have sex there's this pressure not to have sex.

On one hand you get this big stigma about being a virgin. If you're a virgin, suddenly you're not attractive enough to get laid. Or you're prudish, stuck up, a tease (if all you do is make out) or a multitude of other names and catergories. Heck, if you're a guy and you don't have sex suddenly you're gay even if you're just so shy around girls you won't even talk to your friend's wife. It's gotten so bad for virgins that some of them actually make up stories about getting laid to make themselves look good.
[/color][/QUOTE]

[COLOR=RoyalBlue][SIZE=1][B]This has got me laughin' so hard. It's just SO true. I told myself before I wouldn't say these thing to people but I did. And for my friends who are not virgins, I warned them to be good at it or else they'll lose their man. But I'm all over that now and have stopped coz it really got me feeling guilty of things I [I]indirectly[/I] made my friends do.

In my experience, curiosity got the best of me. And I know a lot who do it because of curiosity. For young people hormones and curiosity goes well to push through with the thought of having sex. Also, having been laid is being part of the "in crowd' for some others. For older people on the other hand...

I leave it to the older ones of OB coz i'm not yet [I]that[/I] old to know... ^_^x[/B][/SIZE][/COLOR]

[Inuyasha311]

I have been having sex with my boyfriend now for 4 years 4YEARS he is the only one and thats good for me. I couldn't even think about having sex with anyone else.But having sex with one person that you love does take all that other stress out.

[Rachael]

Its not only curiousity and love and all the other reasons preiveously mentioned though they do contribute to the reason to have sex. Many teenagers nowadays aren't really educated in sex ed. I remember my teacher telling me that the government made a survey to see how much adolecences knew about sex and 2 out of every 5 ((or something like that ) teenagers thought aids could be cured!!!! scary thought huh.

[Shippou]

People have sex simply for the pleasure. When someone is "horny" they don't think much. men are simple minded. that is the best information you will ever get



Shippou

[Heaven's Cloud]

[QUOTE=Shippou]People have sex simply for the pleasure. When someone is "horny" they don't think much. men are simple minded. that is the best information you will ever get
[/QUOTE]

[color=indigo]Why do people say things like this in a serious fashion? That is possibly the worst information you could ever get. I am a man and I am not simple minded. Actually, I would go as far to say that very few men I know are simple minded, especially when it comes to sex.

That doesn?t mean that we don?t want to sleep with pretty much every pretty woman we see, we would like to. It is an inherent animal urge, plus, sex is really, really fun, and it becomes more fun the better you get at it. But most men that I know, and the vast majority of women, try to be fairly cautious. There are too many venereal diseases out there and no one wants to be the first person to contract the one where your penis explodes.

I think the reason why so many people feel that promiscuity is such a big deal is because men tend to lie about it, quite often. Actually, if one of my friends gave me a figure I would probably divide it in half, and even then I may be skeptical.

Anyway, that small minority of people that will screw anything that moves tends to ruin sex for everyone. This is because they usually end up seducing more moral individuals while they are intoxicated and passing along there horrible germs. Yuck.[/color]

[Balmon]

[quote name='Heaven's Cloud']Why do people say things like this in a serious fashion? That is possibly the worst information you could ever get. I am a man and I am not simple minded. Actually, I would go as far to say that very few men I know are simple minded, especially when it comes to sex.[/quote]

Because it is in fashion. Watched TV lately? Or maybe... gone to the movies? Welcome to the sexified generation. So much of it is THROWN at you from every possible angle, it's hard not to miss it.

Regarding the simple-minded thing, you are in that general minority of men who isn't when it comes to sex.

[quote name='Heaven's Cloud']That doesn?t mean that we don?t want to sleep with pretty much every pretty woman we see, we would like to. It is an inherent animal urge, plus, sex is really, really fun, and it becomes more fun the better you get at it. But most men that I know, and the vast majority of women, try to be fairly cautious. There are too many venereal diseases out there and no one wants to be the first person to contract the one where your penis explodes. [/quote]

You know a smart bunch of people then. But walk into a high school, and grab the closest male you see, and ask him if he asked the last girl he slept with if she has a venereal disease. He'll probably look at you as if you're a venereal disease. Chances are excellent that was the LAST thing on his mind.

[quote name='Heaven's Cloud'] Anyway, that small minority of people that will screw anything that moves tends to ruin sex for everyone. This is because they usually end up seducing more moral individuals while they are intoxicated and passing along there horrible germs. Yuck.[/quote]

Agreed.

Phil

[ChibiHorsewoman]

[quote name='Balmon']Chibi hit on a number of great points - but possibly missed a terribly important one: truth be told - many people just have large quantities of sex because they enjoy it. I mean, can anyone of you HONESTLY tell me what rushes can beat that of sex? [/quote]

[color=darkviolet]I omited that reason because I thought it was the most obvious.

Of course sex is fun and people do it for enjoyment. Heck, we're the only species who has sex for recreation rather than just procreation. If people didn't enjoy sex, do you think there would be as many male enhancement and libido enhancement drugs out there? Probably not we'd just learn to go without.

The only rush that I've had that comes close to sex is completing a five foot oxer. But it's still not the same thing let me tell you. :devil:

Damn, how many more months do I have to remain celebate?![/color]

[Harry]

You're over analizing something that is enjoyable.

Also the first time usually sucks anyway.

[Gelgoog Pilot]

Believe it or not but the studly Gelgoog is...a virgin. There i said it I really never felt that much pressure about it....Well a little until I saw what happened to a friend of mine. He didn't catch a disease but after his g/f that he had gone out with for a year or so he was sex crazed. (prepare for rude comment for effectiveness) "Dude I need to get some ***** soon!" Ugh. That was like the strangest thing I had ever heard and well frankly took the pressure away. I really don't want to end up like that.

Anyway...I've often thought about why people do it with out reguard to moderation. Girls (Im not picking on ya) are really strange especially when the word is it that they reach their sexual peek during their thirties and even later(guys reach it at 17 and contiue till god knows when). The several "sluts" I know are mostly a group of popular girls who really are worthless in anything but the sack. One i have known for years upon years, and I got to thinking maybe they are searching for that special feeling...the climax of sex. I'm not an expert on sex or anything but I have heard and read and all that stuff that women tend to climax in a much lesser amount then men. So i got to thinking (this girls is only 14 for christ sake) maybe besides trying to be accepted to the "in" crowd she was searching for that feeling, not getting it with the guys she had sex with she moved on to others.

Aside from my little rant there I don't know that much about the feeling I've never experienced it, I'm both trying to find the right person and well am too busy with my life right now to have to worry about getting laid tonight.

And Chibi just so you know I partly agree with you on the double standard names for women not men...but I have called one such guy who slept around too much a slut heh...OH yeah he got pissed and punched me but...I still got the whole class laughing at him.

[Charles]

[quote name='Shippou']People have sex simply for the pleasure. When someone is "horny" they don't think much. men are simple minded. that is the best information you will ever get[/quote]

[center][IMG]http://img43.exs.cx/img43/1238/notlnoobs.jpg[/IMG][/center]

I have to agree with Heaven's Cloud. It's a common stereotype to assume that men are mindless sexual beasts, but I can assure you that idea is false--generated by the same societal misconceptions that would have you believe that women should be homemakers while men should waste away in front of the television watching sports. The differences between genders, when it comes to their roles in society, is probably more blurred than it's been in quite a while.

Anyway, sex is a big deal because our society is centered around it. Teens feel pressured to have sex because the media places a huge emphasis on sex. Typically, sexual activity is equated with success i.e. if you're not having sex, you're not successful. Look at the performers teens watch: singers, actors, athletes--the one common denominator between all of them is that their sex lives are heavily exploited. Most films and sitcoms prominently feature sex, as do television commercials. Even the most mundane things, like shampoo commercials, are near pornographic in nature.

When sex is the only thing being rammed down young people's throats (no pun intended), of course there's going to be a certain degree of pressure surrounding it. Also, you have to remember that many unfortunate children, living in the ghetto, have nothing else to do. So they have sex. There's no one there for them to teach them about safe sex, so they don't use protection. It's that simple.

Otherwise, the most obvious reason is that sex is an inherent instinct. People are compelled to reproduce so that they can spread their genes to future generations. The fact that it's enjoyable is the icing on the cake.

[Morpheus]

I agree with most of you. At their core, men are sexcrazed beasts. But the ones who show it and can't control it are the old steriotype. Guys are insane at home, but those who can't control themselves in front of others are the pigs.

[Baron Samedi]

[size=1]Why do people drink Coke so much? Why are there 'popular' people? Why do people hope that there are aliens?

Because it is a chance to belong to something greater. Poeple always want to be....to have something. Something special, and 'bigger' than they are. I guess that the... fact of having sex does that. Coupled with the fact that it is apparently wonderful, and some people think entirely with their dicks, you have one rabid sex culture. Doesn't help that at every turn sex is thrown in your face. Most people live for the moment and don't plan ahead. Their fault.[/size]

[Emme888]

[QUOTE=Harry]You're over analizing something that is enjoyable.

Also the first time usually sucks anyway.[/QUOTE]

Really?! it sucks? that's too bad. All i know is that anything sexual is very very enjoyable.. and i have to agree with Harry here.. stop thinking about it too much. People do it, cause it feels good (either to them emotionally or physically or both) simple as that.

But i do have to add as a virgin my opinions are limited i guess. But i have found that anytime i've done anything promiscuous with a guy, the relationship has turned sour. Not being of the sexual act.. its because that's all he ends up wanting to do from that point on. Which i dont mind to a certain point, cause hey we're both getting pleasure from it..but when a person starts feeling like a tool. That's when you know its just about the booty.

Girls are coming more into their own now for sexuality as well. I feel that it is a [U][B]great[/B][/U] thing that women are finally realizing that its ok to make sure that they are getting some enjoyment out of it as well. Ladies pleasure is a good thing, enjoy it. I think women should start thinking like men. I know at first everyone wants to do the emotional attachments to the person, but if a person can go on throughout life without being dependent on another person for their well being. Kudos to them as well. Cause honestly.. that's where i am in my life. I dont have any ugre for a boyfriend at all.. none what so ever. But I am human so i do randomly do some promiscuous stuff with people just to get it out of my system. This might sound bad to most... but it works for me. Besides if doin that once a month is bad.. than shoot me.. cause i dont think that theres anything wrong with enjoying it.

And its something that should be enjoyed as well. Whether you're pleasing yourself by masterbation or finding in another partner.. make sure you're enjoying it. Cause if you're not than dont do it.. cause it's not worth the worries if you dont like it.

I think that's it.. do just keep it simple. Do it if it feels right and good to you, and be responsible, Have safe sex. Or dont have sex at all.. for some all they need is oral and that get the job done as well. orgasm by getting urself off, or by getting someone else off. I love it when i know that im am sexually pleasing to whoever im with.. so everyone.. dont be afraid to tell the person ur with that it feels great .. or give them a little advice.. cause its all for the best.

wow.. weird this is the one subject i could talk forever on....
and im still a virgin...
does anyone else think thats weird? :laugh:
hmm for any more advice i suggest comso its the dirttiest magizine for sex tips know to man kind.. but also the best as well

[ChibiHorsewoman]

[quote name='Emme888']I think women should start thinking like men. [/quote]


[color=darkviolet]Yes we should all start thinking with our clitorises. That way we'll be guaranteed to get off.

I can't really think of what else to add to this right now.[/color]

[PiroMunkie]

[quote name='ChibiHorsewoman][color=darkviolet']Heck, we're the only species who has sex for recreation rather than just procreation.[/color][/quote][size=1]Actually, dolphins also will have sex for fun. I think pigs mights as well ... but I know that dolphins do. I also doubt that many animals [i]only[/i] have sex for procreation. If a one gets horny enough I am sure there will be little to stop him/her from getting what he/she wants. Rape is not a crime in the animal kingdom, lol.

Personally, I have a rather low sex drive, heh. It does not stop me from shamelessly flirting with whoever (mostly just for fun, I do not care if it is a guy or girl, lol), but I really feel no need or want for sex. I do not know what it is, but I am just too tired or lethargic. And for some reason people are usually surprised to find out I am virgin, lol.


Why people like to have sex for any reason other than procreation is a little fuzzy to me. I suppose experimentation and the pursuit of some kind of knowledge is a possibility, lol, but to do it just mindlessly would be a waste. So really, unless I feel like I am going to really get something out of it that is worthwhile, it does not seem like anything that great. So that is why procreation seems like the only sensible reason to me.


Charles and Semjaza are the main people I agree with throughout this topic. I cannot vouche for Tony's claim that "Sex is incredibly enjoyable..." heh, but other than that I do not think I can add much here.[/size]

[Guest XBebop]

Procreation the only [i]sensible[/i] reason? LOL. If you ever have sex, or even masturbate you'll find out why people like to have sex. it feels good. reeeaaallllyyyy good. On another hand, if you only have sex once every 20 years to create life; your chances of getting AIDS are low. So it's a win-win situation, really.

[Charles]

[QUOTE=ChibiHorsewoman][color=darkviolet]Yes we should all start thinking with our clitorises. That way we'll be guaranteed to get off.

I can't really think of what else to add to this right now.[/color][/QUOTE]

[center][IMG]http://img49.exs.cx/img49/8058/132935.jpg[/IMG][/center]

[CENTER] :rolleyes: [/CENTER]

It is a respectable point, despite its flawed execution within the post. The real issue here isn't how women approach sexual relationships differently than men--because presently, I could argue that people of both genders probably desire pretty much the same things.

Apparent throughout this thread, is the portrait of the infantilized male, being guided by his dick, and little else. Forget the fact that the amount of housework and childcare that men tackle has doubled in the last twenty-five years. They're not interested in sex because they want to share the benefits of an intimate relationship with someone they're committed to, right? I know, they just want to hit it and run! Wrong-o.

The only harmful difference between sexual motives between men and women is psychologically implanted by society. That is, society views women who embrace sex as openly as men in a negative light. Look at all the derogatory terms floating around for promiscuous women compared to males. Men aren't treated nearly as badly for having many partners. I think that's the only difference, as it stands. And that's the thing that needs to change.

I know some kind of alarm bell that tells you to ignore our posts goes off in your heads when a male comes in here and paints a portrait of the true reality of the situation. But please, let's be realistic here. I think it's just as damaging for some of you to automatically stereotype men, as it would be for me to suggest that females should be strictly homemakers. Neither train of thought is valid. Only when people understand such a basic fact, could they then begin to understand why people have sex outside of their reproductive instincts.

So the real point should be this: "Society should treat both men and women equally when it comes to the volume of their sexual activity."

Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm going to go sleep with a variety of women for no good reason.

[PiroMunkie]

[quote name='XBebop]Procreation the only [i]sensible[/i'] reason? LOL. If you ever have sex, or even masturbate you'll find out why people like to have sex. it feels good. reeeaaallllyyyy good. On another hand, if you only have sex once every 20 years to create life; your chances of getting AIDS are low. So it's a win-win situation, really.[/quote][size=1]Doing something just because it feels good makes little sense. A bowl of ice cream on a hot day also feels really good, but you do not see me turning up the heat in the house just so I can have a good bowl of ice cream. After all, that really would not make much sense either.

Masturbation does not feel all [i]that[/i] good, lol. Is there a bit of reason to masturbation? Yes, it helps reduce the risk of prostate cancer (or so it has been said). I can get more thrill listening to a good song than I can masturbating.

I do not spite people for having sex for whatever reason or excuse, I just find the whole concept really amusing. People can have sex all they want for I care. Heck, I would watch. Well, watch for the sake of studying. Much like a scientist would study the mating habits of an animal. I could probably have more fun thinking about all the possible aspects of it than I could if I just had sex. Do I have my own firm morals and ethics regarding the topic? Yes, but I am not going to infringe them upon other people. That is not my place.

I am not trying to denounce the opinion that sex feels good. I am just saying there would have to be much more to it than just a feeling if I, myself, were to participate in the act. I want to know the outcomes of going through the process before I consent myself to do so. If not, the next thing I know I could have unexpected twins on the way and a burning sensation in strange places.[/size]

[nolimits]

[COLOR=Indigo][B][FONT=Georgia]Most people avoid this subject because it's embarrissing. If you ask most adults why they have sex they'll problely tell you, because it's fun.

Sex does feel good, that's why most people do it, but if that's the reason a person is having sex for, then, in my opinion, they missed the true value of sex.

During a person's life, there will always be times one will desire sex more than anything else or they just have crossed "the line of no returning" with their parterner.

But in my opinion, sex is created by god for the purpose of reproducing. However, most people do it these days for pleasure. personaly i would only have sex, when i love my parterner so much that i want to show him everything i have and take him deep inside with me.

When sex is done due to the desire of pleasure, it is nothing more than just a physical act, but when it is given to the loved one with passion, it is the highest feeling of human expressions.

~peace~
[/FONT][/B][/COLOR]

[Hevn]

[B][COLOR=RoyalBlue][SIZE=1]One true fact: God's intention for creating sex is not just because of reproduction but so married people can feel their unity (being one body) and enjoy the pleasures sex can give.

God did made sex for the pleasure of the human flesh but it has restrictions.[/SIZE][/COLOR][/B]

[Dan L]

I have nothing to add onto what nolimits and 'hEvN have said, as I pretty much share their opinions

Sex itself isn't bad; it's just our over-indulgent (specifically all-pleasure, no commitment/sacrifice) culture which makes it so

With regards to why some people try to have sex with as many people as possible, it [i]is[/i] a very appealing temptation (as temptations usually are), and thus a lot of people don't think logically when confronted with it.

Promiscuous sex has it's major downfall in that who knows what kind of stuff you might catch, or whether or not you might end up pregnant or impregnating someone.

Then again, [i]every[/i] temptation has it's bad after effects. But people who carry those out rarely think about them at the time, or if they do, they think that the act is worth it anyway.