Does Experimentation make you Bi or Gay?

[k9-Girl]

I've read that most women have in someway or another either experimented with or fantisized about another being with another woman at one point in their lives. This being the case, I mean, such a phenomenon being so common place, encompassing almost, if not the majority of women, does it really constitute the finite label of bisexual? I know I've done my share of experimenting with girls, but I consider myself bisexual as a result of my inherant sexual preference not what few acts I've done in my past. I tried talking about this with a couple friends of mine and they're convinced that if you experiment at least once you're bi so I was curious what you guys thought. I know guys like to think all girls are bi and that those who deny it are just embarassed, but I'm not so sure, if I was a normal girl I might be content with my own opinion, but obviously having a hightened libido I'd much rather rely on the views of others here rather than just playcate to some social dillusion of all women being freaky. Are we all inherently bisexual?

[youta moteuchi]

acttually, I think that you are bi or not deppending on what comes AFTER the experimentation..... For example, is a guy has an intercorse with another one, but doesn't like it, or realizes that's not what he wants, then I think he's not gay.... it could be though, that if he tryes time after another he WANTS to be gay, hehe. But what happens is that feelings like frenship, or even admiration can make you think like you are sexually atrcted to someone, when you are not, actually. And if an experimantation comes from it, it doesn't mean you "switche sides" or whatever...

well, that's just my opinion and you are not to agree with it if you don't.... (was it redundant?)

[Dagger]

Well, you know what they say about the Kinsey Scale... ;)

More seriously, my answer to your question is no. A lot of the women who experiment with their own sex or call themselves bi-curious are just wannabe "Girls Gone Wild" who do it primarily because most men find that sort of thing attractive. However, there clearly are plenty of people who feel genuinely uncertain about their sexuality. Sometimes this gets sorted out as you grow up; many, many adolescent girls go through a fleeting period in which they have crushes on female teachers and so forth. Sometimes it lasts longer and you end up developing strong romantic relationships with members of both sexes, or only women.

Numerous people, both straight and gay, feel very strongly about and are quite confident in their sexual orientation. Because of this, I think it's a little silly to say that everyone is inherently bisexual.

~Dagger~

[ColourDeaf]

[QUOTE=Dagger IX1]Well, you know what they say about the Kinsey Scale... ;)

Numerous people, both straight and gay, feel very strongly about and are quite confident in their sexual orientation. Because of this, I think it's a little silly to say that everyone is inherently bisexual.

~Dagger~[/QUOTE]

Not necessarily. Some pyshcologists could say that sexual drive is not only a natural drive for reproduction, but can be seen as a form of dominance over others, so it is viable that people (if going by Freud, especially men) could be inherently have instincts to dominate other s of their own sex, as showing that they are the best (an "alpha male" response, as it were), although this is unlikely.

But I digress.

Experimentation isn't necessarily a clean cut sign as to wether a person is bi/gay, as the others have said, it's merely if you find it more attractive than hetrosexual sex.

But that's just my two cents.

ColourDeaf

[AzureWolf]

[font=Book Antiqua][color=blue]If you are asking for the official medical standing on this question, the answer is simply no. Keep in mind though, that with this statement comes also the fact that over 75% of 18 year old girls are not virgins. Experimentation still counts as sex, but does not brand one with a sexual preference.[/color][/font]

[font=Book Antiqua][color=#0000ff]Anyway, the point is, in our sexually weak generations, there is far more experimentation than one would expect normally.[/color][/font]

[gothicanimechic]

personally, i dont think that it makes you bisexual or gay/lesbian (take your pick!). it is just a natural thing-not that i do it! lol

[Guest Sean]

[COLOR=Silver]Ok really when you think about it, your not being bi-sexual, your being bi-curious. Just interested, and experimenting to see what it is like. That is the crossroads, come to say. You could either stay as you are not bothered about any of it, and go as it comes. Or you could go down one of three paths.

The Bi-Sexual path, where you like it enpough to become Bi-Sexual
The Staright Path, where you didn't like it and give up on that experience
Or the In-Between, where you don't really care.

But really, just experimenting is the beginning of that path, your not essentially Bi, your just Bi-curious. Which has been said in a post before. [/COLOR]

[Skye]

All the good men are gay and taken.

[quote name='youta moteuchi']acttually, I think that you are bi or not deppending on what comes AFTER the experimentation..... For example, is a guy has an intercorse with another one, but doesn't like it, or realizes that's not what he wants, then I think he's not gay.... it could be though, that if he tryes time after another he WANTS to be gay, hehe. But what happens is that feelings like frenship, or even admiration can make you think like you are sexually atrcted to someone, when you are not, actually. And if an experimantation comes from it, it doesn't mean you "switche sides" or whatever...[/quote]

^_^ Exactly. Mostly, when you experiment, its just to see. Your only bi or gay or whatever if you LIKED it afterwards? I should know. Youta has said most of what I was going to say, anyway, so: case in point. On his last sentence: Gods, are you reading my mind? I am in love with my BFFL, though not physically attracted to her. Now, in some cases I was head-over-heels in physical attraction for some girl, but never really ?liked? her as anything more than a friend?

Off topic: I can?t believe I?m using PINK in my signature? *shudders* I hate pink? but strangley, my sig appeals to me?

[Richard Doherty]

Experimentation is just that; experimentation. To be bi-sexual, I believe you would have to pursue the act of intercourse with the same and opposite sex. But a one night stand wouldn't give you a label. If you continue the act or even enjoy it, then yes you are bi/gay/lesbian.

As for being inherently bi, that's still up for debate. Human nature is very complex, and puberty only makes it more complex. During that time you are open to new things. As they say, that is the time in which a person decides who they are going to be for the rest of their lives.

[ChibiHorsewoman]

[color=darkviolet]The closest I ever came to experimentation is when I kissed a friend of mine in Wal*Mart because we were bored. As far as I know I'm still straight.

Experimentation is just what it sounds like, you're trying to figure out what works for you you aren't officially whatever label you're going to use on yourself until you decide on dating guys, girls or both esclusively. So in my opinion, sleeping with one girl or two then staying strictly guys only doesn't suddenly make you a lesbian in denial or a bisexual.

Hell, I have an over active libido too-which is a real you know what because my guy's over seas. But I'm not going to go there too extensively. Nobody really wants to know about another person's sex life...unless you're a celebratey. [/color]

[Guest ScirosDarkblade]

A girl experimenting with a same-sex sexual encounter doesn't make her gay or bi. It makes her hot. Now if only I could convince my girlfriend of that...

[Charles]

[quote name='k9-Girl']I've read that most women have in someway or another either experimented with or fantisized about another being with another woman at one point in their lives. This being the case, I mean, such a phenomenon being so common place, encompassing almost, if not the majority of women, does it really constitute the finite label of bisexual? I know I've done my share of experimenting with girls, but I consider myself bisexual as a result of my inherant sexual preference not what few acts I've done in my past. I tried talking about this with a couple friends of mine and they're convinced that if you experiment at least once you're bi so I was curious what you guys thought. I know guys like to think all girls are bi and that those who deny it are just embarassed, but I'm not so sure, if I was a normal girl I might be content with my own opinion, but obviously having a hightened libido I'd much rather rely on the views of others here rather than just playcate to some social dillusion of all women being freaky. Are we all inherently bisexual?[/quote]
Just because you try some Mexican food, does that make you Mexican?

I know that's stripped-down logic that doesn't necessarily apply to this situation effecitvely, and in that case, I believe that Dagger answered the post effectively. Teenagers are often overcome by a variety of unfamiliar feelings all at once, both physical and mental. It's the period of their lives where they grow into themselves. They're constantly searching for an identity. That is, exposing themselves to new experiences and trying new things. So, to succumb to the whirlwind of emotions, hormones, and curiosity, certainly doesn?t automatically define an individual. Nope, it?s the lifestyle they choose based on those avenues that dictates their sexual orientation.

Although, if you're confused and post on OtakuBoards, your chances of being homosexual increase dramatically from what I can tell.

[MissWem]

[COLOR=DarkRed]lol!!!

There is no way people could be inherently bi. Or else you wouldn't get extremely homophobic men/women. Unless you're going to try argue that they're homophobic because they once thought they might've been gay and find it a personal attack or something...

But I must agree with a lot of the other people who label such experimentation as being bi-curious...

I myself have had moments of bi-curious discussion with a close friend. We haven't really gone anywhere with it. It's the usual, flirt back and forth, act intimate in public just for some attention, mostly coz we get quite bored with life sometimes..except that she feigns complete and utter jealousy if another girl flirts with me (of course then one starts to wonder why other girls would flirt with me in the first place, I really don't have an answer to that).

Although I think it almost got me into a bit of a mess once, my Exbf (my bf at the time) thought I had cheated on him with her :p that was bad...hahahahaha...oh well...

Experimentation is a good way of figuring out where you sexuality is heading. Plus it makes for some interesting stories in the future.

I know I'm straight, but it's the curiousity that drives me :)[/COLOR]

[James]

[color=#707875]There's a really simple answer to all of this.

If you are attracted to someone of the same sex and not someone of the opposite sex, you are gay. If you are attracted to people of both sexes, you are bisexual. And if you're attracted to members of the opposite sex, you are heterosexual.

This is pretty obvious, irrespective of whether or not you "experiment". You might have sex with someone and totally dislike it. But that's just sex. The question is, could you fall in love with someone of the same gender? There's a [i]lot[/i] more to it than sex; it's a very deep thing.

So I don't think that experimentation or sex alone determines what your sexuality is. It's the way you are able to feel about someone that dictates it -- whether or not you can fall in love and be attracted to someone of whatever gender.[/color]

[Solo Tremaine]

[COLOR=#503F86]I don't think experimentation has any bearing on what you might or might not 'be' or 'become' in terms of your sexuality. Experimentation by definition surely just means trying anything you take a fancy to as a means to find yourself and what you like. Experimentation doesn't change you into being one or the other. I might kiss a guy who kisses really well, but that one event won't make me gay. It doesn't work like that.

Generally, I know girls to be a lot more open to same-sex experimentaion than boys, but it doesn't make them bisexual. Like James said, it's sex. And to some extent, I think a lot of people do it to show off, especially when it's become more socially acceptable, almost popular in places, to be gay.[/COLOR]

[Burori]

[QUOTE=Delirium]All the good men are gay and taken.
[/QUOTE]


I fully resent that comment. I am neither gay nor taken. Plus I AM a good man ^_^

As for the whole bi issue. My opinion is...not really. If you enjoy it and keep at it with a same sex buddy then I suppose that is a indication that you are gay if you just try it once or twice (depending on the situation for the second try) you're just curious of what that is.

So there's the Almighty OB's Legendary Super Saiyajin's thoughts for ya.

[k9-Girl]

It's interesting comparing these theories (most of which sound like reasonable dead on observations of reality) to those of our parents, hehe...

My mom just shakes her head and says I am "Just confused" when she use to find me with a girlfriend making out, lol. I honestly don't think my parents care what I am as long as I end up with a guy and make babies, tee-hee. Which might be the case seeing as 98% of all physically attractive bi or homo females are insane or fake. Experimentation is fun, but I often found myself more satisfied with males as the penis is a very very wonderful thing. And trust me people, threesomes... they're horrifically overrated, don't buy into the hype, just be content with the one on one experience... Every threesome inevitably becomes a twosome with one very angry person on the sidelines. Some more advice... Sex underwater, not fun, eh, well just let me put it this way, a woman's lubrication is water solluable, think about it people... And Anal Sex? I was never dumb enough to even try that. Unless you're two guys without anyother options, it's just unecessary and quite unhealthy for many objective and undeniable reasons, but hey, whatever floats your boat, I'm just sayin'.

[ChibiHorsewoman]

[quote name='k9-Girl']My mom just shakes her head and says I am "Just confused" when she use to find me with a girlfriend making out, lol. I honestly don't think my parents care what I am as long as I end up with a guy and make babies, tee-hee. Which might be the case seeing as 98% of all physically attractive bi or homo females are insane or fake. Experimentation is fun, but I often found myself more satisfied with males as the penis is a very very wonderful thing. And trust me people, threesomes... they're horrifically overrated, don't buy into the hype, just be content with the one on one experience... Every threesome inevitably becomes a twosome with one very angry person on the sidelines. Some more advice... Sex underwater, not fun, eh, well just let me put it this way, a woman's lubrication is water solluable, think about it people... And Anal Sex? I was never dumb enough to even try that.[/quote]

[color=darkviolet]Girl, three very important words for you:

[size=3]Too much information[/size] [/color]

[James P. Galvatron]

Thanks for ruining the experience K9-girl I mean like I could not have experienced that thing my self and next time warn us before you give us any information like that.

To the question I am not bi-sexual nor homosexual and I have never thought of a guy in any other way than a bud to play basketball, play xbox, or hang out at the mall with.

I mean guys think of bi-sexual girls as hot, but most people think of gay guys or bi-sexual not really hot it's like guys think homosexual girls or bi girls are hot, but girls don't really think of homosexual guys or bi-sexuals guys as hot. I don't really care if someone is homosexual, straight, inbetween , or whatnot it doesn't matter to me I think of them as the same person they were before they told me.

[k9-Girl]

Too Much Information? Sweet Heart, if you think that is too much information then well... heheh... we'll just leave it at that.

Ruining the experience Inuyasha my boy? Sorry, the truth sucks I guess, better to learn it now before you're let down during the actual act. Sorry for no warning, but you could have stopped reading at any time and I personally didn't find it that extreme, but what do I know... sigh...

I'd edit my post to remove that info but since it has already been quoted, there's really no point, lol.

[Gelgoog Pilot]

*shakes head at Delirium* That really hurts...I don't know if you just called me gay or a bad guy. YOu shouldn't judge us on only a few observations. We don't go around saying how girls are eather carpet-eaters or justworthless sluts. Sorry Im getting heated up.

Well. Ok on this topic....I don't think experimentation is a way to brand some one's sexual preference. I experimented once *bows head ashamed* Thank god I can blame it on being drunk. I was NOT cool...I sort of wish i had been so drunk I had forgotten it heh. But enough of that, if you enjoy it and seek it out then well you're just that way.

I agree with the statment that alot of bis are probably chicks wanting to be wild or erotic...some load of crap like that. I personally don't find it as a turn on. I don't want to go to my g/f's house and find her making out with a girl on the couch. Cheating is vheating...no matter the sex.

[k9-Girl]

[quote name='Gelgoog Pilot']*shakes head at Delirium* That really hurts...I don't know if you just called me gay or a bad guy.[/quote]

Are you talking to Me? O.o; What are you talking about?

[QUOTE]YOu shouldn't judge us on only a few observations.[/QUOTE]

Why not? What's fit for the goose is fit for the gander.

[QUOTE]We don't go around saying how girls are eather carpet-eaters or justworthless sluts.[/QUOTE]

And neither do I, so... what's your point?

[QUOTE]Sorry Im getting heated up.[/QUOTE]

What the hell is wrong with you?

[oshi]

"Experimentation."

That's all it is. It doesn't dictate anything. If it's experimentation to you, then that means that you are a willing participant in something that you can control. So, you control which way you go. Male, or female? It's just about sex and what you want.

But when it becomes something bigger than just what you want, then you can gauge it as something that really matters. That's when it becomes a part of who you are, and you can't really even measure who you are against other people. If you are one way, that's just you. It doesn't make you straight, and it doesn't make you gay. If you want to say you're bisexual because you've fooled around with both men and women, nobody can stop you.

Just go with the flow. Once you really can't control who you're attracted to, keep track of the trends. If you keep falling in love with the same kind of person, acknowledge the pattern and take it from there. It's really not all that different from a girl falling for tall guys with glasses over and over again.

It's just viewed differently by society.

[Harry]

There's no such thing as bi-curious. It's mainly just attention whoring.

[Transtic Nerve]

no one knows anything about being gay/bi unless they are.

It's not about sex, only an ignorant person would think sexual orientation is about sex... its about love. Everyone experiments... probably 50% of the boys here probably experimented...