Mother-in-law trouble

[ChibiHorsewoman]

[color=darkviolet]Plain and simple, I can't stand my mother-in-law. Yes, I know it's a bit cliche, but trust me I don't know many people who can stand her anyway.

It wasn't that way when I first started seeing my husband. At first she was cool with me and I was cool with her-I guess. I think it was because I knew that L. didn't have much of a family, infact I thought that she was the only family he had. Yeah, i knew he had a brother, but he lived (and still does live) out of state and from what she told me they don't get along. Actually they do, his brother paid for one year tuition at a private school and dropped out of college to take care of L. when something happened with their mom.

I think it must have been after we got engaged that she must have realized that I was taking away (her way of looking at it, not mine) the only member of her family who actually has anything to do with her. Now she gets on my case about how I should lose weight. Yes, I know I'm a bit over weight, but compaired to her Sveltlana Ortina (did I get that right?) looks like Katherine Zwelger when she was playing Bridgit Jones.

And now we're about to have a baby in a matter of days (literally). I went over her place last month. (FYI, me going over to her apartment means that she comes outside and I talk to her since the place is overrun with cats and smells like low tide on a hot day) She gave me this used diaper bag that smelled like her cats had used it for their second litter box and wanted me to make sure to bring the baby over when she arrived. When I told her I couldn't bring her over because of the cats and teh fact that she smokes so much she was like so, you can leave her outside. Not in the middle of October in Western New York. Also she said that it wouldn't be any different than having her at my parent's house since they have my cat and two dogs. Following that, she proceeeded to light up a cigarette (after I had asked her not to smoke around me) and when I complained she said quite rudely that it wasn't going in my face. At that moment a breeze blewmy way taking the smoke and the smell of her in my direction (yeah I should probably mention that she doesn't bathe and dresses like a slutty 20 something) I decided that it was time to take my leave, so I did.

My mother-in-law has no sense of hygeine (no, Lincoln wouldn't mind me saying this since he feels the same way) and her house keeping skills leave much to be desired. Never mind the fact that she can't manage to go more than ten minutes without a cigarette. Yet she wants me to bring my daughter over there. The woman couldn't even manage to raise her own kids yet she wants to tell me how to raise mine.

My question is how would you handle the situation, since I know the majority of you aren't in this position at the moment. I really don't want my daughter to have much to do with my mother-in-law aside from the occasional visit at my parent's house...very occasional. But I know it's not completely up to me, Lincoln deserves some say in it as well. And my mom keeps saying that's it's not right to deny her the right to see her grandchild. But she kept Lincoln away from every member of her and his father's families for nearly ten years. So how would that be different?Wouldn't it be easier than trying to explain this woman to a three year old?

Advice or even a scolding if someone thinks I'm wrong about trying to keep the paternal grandmother away from her granddaughter would be appriciated. Thanks[/color]

[chobit]

No,no,its ok to hate her,we can't all get along or this world wouldn't be so ****** up.

Have you ever seen that 70's Show?(Go watch it if you haven't)Well,Kitty has got a ***** of a mother.Shes increadly mean/funny and makes Kitty feels very tired and she always ends up going to bed.

Don't go to bed.Fight her dammit.Tell her your allergic to smoke and then take her to an old ladys store for clothes.Maybe Lincoln can talk to her?

I know this isn't good advice,hell it won't even work,but I tried considering I'm only almost 15 and probably won't have in laws anytime soon.

Good luck! :love:

[Delta]

[COLOR=DarkRed][SIZE=1]
My, my. What an abominable old lady!

Hire a cleaning lady for her.
Well, that's what I would do. Perhaps your husband would like that, too. The idea sounds thoughtful!

Love and Peace! :love2:

[/SIZE][/COLOR]

[Gavin]

[SIZE=1]Well it sounds like you've got a truly wonderful mother-in-law, pardon my sarcasm, to be honest I don't think there's really anything you can do to resolve this. If she wants to be a tramp, for the lack of a better word the you're just going to have to put up with it or move away from her.

I find it amusing that this is the first time I've ever heard about a wife who dislikes her mother-in-law, usually or at least in my experience it's the son-in-law who doesn't get on. If she really does get on your nerves that much I'd advise you to just tell her that if she does want to see her grandchild she'd better stop acting up and show you a little respect. Not nice but she doesn't seem to be a nice woman.[/SIZE]

[Harry]

Sever all the ties. Any other way such as "talking about it" are futile.

[ChibiHorsewoman]

[quote name='Harry']Sever all the ties. Any other way such as "talking about it" are futile.[/quote]

[color=darkviolet]Actually I've come to the descision that I should trhow her in the trunkof my car and toss her in the lake. It wouldn't be a far drive and she could get a bath when I threw her in.

Oh but now she wants us to buy a tattoo for her birthday. The woman has 15 already. Where the hell is she going to put another one? Not to mention why does she feel she should be able to ask for something like that. Getting inked is not cheap!

I swear, I'm kind of glad the doctor put me on bed rest since Tuesday, that way I don't have to deal with her.[/color]