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Oreo's as.... sex symbols?


Guest Midnight Rush
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Guest Midnight Rush
Oreo's... the delicious little black round things with the wonderful white inbetweenness. Commonly known as a cookie with filling. These "cookies" can be seen all around the world, as the definitive guide to truth, the TV tells us....

But what makes Oreo's sell so well?

I can't be taste or price, because that would be logical. No. It must be something better. Thus we come to the point of this topic: What are the REAL effects of Oreo's?

I was discussing this with myself and thought of a few things:

Stops baldness

Stops wieghtgain

Gives immortal life...

But then I realized, those things weren't good enough. I know what it is. They sexify whoever eats them. Has anyone else noticed this? I haven't either, don't worry.

The lack of observable evidence hasn't stopped scientists before, so I must carry on this quest: What are the mystical properties of Oreo's?

I need your opinions. Or we will all be doomed to a life without... knowing!
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First things first, dude you are reading way too far into it. The oreo cookie is just that, a cookie. Two crunchy chocolate outer pieces sandwiching a layer of creamy white...creamy stuff. Nothing more, nothing less.

Next, "They sexify whoever eats them." not true. Otherwise, I'd most likely have my own personal harem by now.

Lastly, just take it at face value. An extremely tasty, and errily addictive cookie snack.

Now, if you'll excuse me, I must finish watching this hilarious flash toon, "Dad's Home."

Goodbye.
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I think an Oreo would be intresting during sex.Is that what this topic is about?I don't get it.

Anyways,all I know about Oreos is that they contain a lot of fat.So I can't eat them.Especially the "double stuffed" kind.When my mum buys them,I write "FAT MAKERS" on the bag so I don't eat them.
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[COLOR=DarkSlateBlue][SIZE=1]It's because they give your milk extra flavour when they go all soggy and drop off when you dip them.
Actually, I find that quite annoying...that's why I don't eat Oreos....and I'm fully aware that this was a joke, please don't take me seriously.[/SIZE][/COLOR]
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[size=1][color=darkblue]Woah, if Oreos "sexify" whoever eats them... I must be really sexy.

Anyway, maybe the way some people eat Oreos makes other people kinky. Heh. That could be true though, depending on how a person is, a lot of things can make people kinky, but I'm not going to get into that....

Oreos are Oreos and that's all my mind can think of past that.[/color][/size]
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Guest Midnight Rush
Interesting chobit... I haven't considered that.

*Consideres that*

Yea it would be interesting. Good even, depending..

I assume milk is the drink of choice while consuming the non-sexificational Oreo's?

Does anyone drink Coke and Oj (Seperate glasses) with them like me?
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I like Oreos, I eat Oreos, despite this I consider them rather unsexy. They make your saliva black and black saliva is something I associate with people that chew tobacco or some other unhygenic habit. I wouldn't want to kiss someone with an unhygenic habit or someone that reminds me of someone with an unhygenic habit and therefore Oreos aren't sexy. ::nods::
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[color=hotpink][size=1]I TOTALLY believe that Oreos make you sexier. At least in my case, lol. As I was sitting here today, minding my own business, munching on my Halloween Oreos (orange cream, yummyness), Mimmi dons me as [b]Sexyness.[/b] Why else would she give that nickname to me? Is it because I was already sexy? (*coughyeahcough*)

MAYBE IT WAS THE OREOS!

Sorry, I get SO enthused about Oreos. They are my favorite cookie. And even if I am getter fatter, at least I still look sexy while eating them. ^_^[/color][/size]
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[color=darkviolet]I guess if you sexily lick the creamy whit filling Oreos suddenly become some kind of sexiness. But aside from that fact I don't see the sexiness in Oreos? Nope I dodn't see that.

Now Hostess cupcakes... :tasty: Don't you think?

Also off topic, but off the top of my head does anyone besides me think that a twinkie is some sort of phallic representaiton? Or maybe it's just me and what's about to be six months of [spoiler]sex[/spoiler] deprivation.[/color]
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[quote name='Jim_Hawking']The oreo cookie is just that, a cookie. Two crunchy chocolate outer pieces sandwiching a layer of creamy white...creamy stuff. Nothing more, nothing less.[/quote]
[COLOR=RoyalBlue][SIZE=1][B]It's not just a cookie! >:O[/B]
[/SIZE][/COLOR]

[quote name='chobit][color=darkviolet']Especially the "double stuffed" kind[/color][/quote]
[COLOR=RoyalBlue][SIZE=1][B]Double stuffed oreos will make you god.[/B][/SIZE][/COLOR]

[quote name='Methuselah][COLOR=DarkSlateBlue][SIZE=1]It's because they give your milk extra flavour when they go all soggy and drop off when you dip them.[/SIZE'][/COLOR][/quote]
[COLOR=RoyalBlue][SIZE=1][B]Maybe you dip them too long. =D[/B][/SIZE][/COLOR]

[quote name='Lix][size=1][color=darkblue]Woah, if Oreos "sexify" whoever eats them... I must be really sexy.[/color'][/size][/quote]
[COLOR=RoyalBlue][SIZE=1][B]No, dear. There's a special way of eating Oreos so you'll achieve sexiness. ^_~[/B][/SIZE][/COLOR]

[quote name='DetectiveMikeRS']Oreos represent the unity of mankind regardless of skin color, or that's the black and white cookie according to Sienfeld.[/quote]
[COLOR=RoyalBlue][SIZE=1][B]No they don't. >:O[/B][/SIZE][/COLOR]

[quote name='anatema']They make your saliva black.[/quote]
[COLOR=RoyalBlue][SIZE=1][B]They make the in betweens of your teeth black too, heh.[/B][/SIZE][/COLOR]

[quote name='Queen Asuka][color=hotpink][size=1]MAYBE IT WAS THE OREOS![/color'][/size][/quote]
[COLOR=RoyalBlue][SIZE=1][B]I know for sure that it was. ^_~[/B][/SIZE][/COLOR]

[quote name='ChibiHorsewoman][color=darkviolet]Or maybe it's just me and what's about to be six months of [spoiler]sex[/spoiler'] deprivation.[/color][/quote]
[COLOR=RoyalBlue][SIZE=1][B]I think it's the six-months of sex deprivation, you poor thing.[/B][/SIZE][/COLOR]

[COLOR=RoyalBlue][SIZE=1][B]I'm a living proof that oreos sexify people. Just ask [URL=http://http://www.otakuboards.com/member.php?u=7699]Alan[/URL]. ^_~[/B][/SIZE][/COLOR]
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[QUOTE=Hevn][COLOR=RoyalBlue][SIZE=1]

[COLOR=RoyalBlue][SIZE=1][B]No, dear. There's a special way of eating Oreos so you'll achieve sexiness. ^_~[/B][/SIZE][/COLOR]
[/SIZE][/COLOR][/QUOTE]


really? I didn't know consuming fatty calories made you sexy? yeah eating a couple won't hurt you... but obviously from your obession with them.. it sounds like to me you're packin down the oreos at a fast pace. Slow down, and enjoy them for simplely being a cookie.

And eating bags full at a time will only give you a gut...

[SIZE=4]And that's definately not sexy.[/SIZE]
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[QUOTE=Emme888]really? I didn't know consuming fatty calories made you sexy? yeah eating a couple won't hurt you... but obviously from your obession with them.. it sounds like to me you're packin down the oreos at a fast pace. Slow down, and enjoy them for simplely being a cookie.

And eating bags full at a time will only give you a gut...

[SIZE=4]And that's definately not sexy.[/SIZE][/QUOTE]
[COLOR=RoyalBlue][SIZE=1][B]~_~

I'm not obsessed with oreos.

*someone hands out ten bags of oreos*

OREOS!!11!!1! *munch munch munch*

Lol. Obviously, this thread is full of nonsense as it's created for the sole purpose of jesting around. So this be the last post I'll be making here. But I'll be answering the questions of the thread starter [I]seriously [/I]with my own opinion.

Oreos probably sell so well because of its taste accompanied by an impressive advertisement of showing us a unique way of eating a simple cookie. The "Twist, Lick and Dunk" experience was new and striking to little kids and even grown-ups too.

Now what are the REAL effects of Oreos? In REALITY, if you take in so much you'll get more fatty calories than you should normally take in. Another effect might be getting high from all the sugar. Now we all know the effects of being high.

Uh, I refuse to answer the question about Oreos and sexiness. >_<

What are the mystical properties of Oreo's? Basically, I don't know. If it has mystical properties it should be written in their secret recipe or something so... I just don't know, man.[/B][/SIZE][/COLOR]
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Guest Midnight Rush
I think thats it hevn, they make you high from sugar.

And when you are high, you lose a few inhibitions, thus opening a POSSIBILITY of sexification. And if many around you are already high from sugar or something, then it opens the probability of sexification...lol
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[color=darkviolet]Scary, but true a sugar high can make anyone seem sexy to you. So I would advise not sleeping with someone you met after comsuming a package of Oreos. Or for that matter Cosmos and pixie sticks. Not cool.

But if you already have teh one you love I guess a sugar high could help produce some pretty good sack sessions since I guess sugar and chocolate produce endorphines. I think[/color]
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[FONT=Verdana][SIZE=1] The Question is how are oreos not sexy? think about it..a long day..eat alot of oreos..then you somehow get a craving for milk. hmm? Maybe that extra sugar really does bring out your sexiness....or maybe not. [/FONT][/SIZE]
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[QUOTE=Jim_Hawking]First things first, dude you are reading way too far into it. The oreo cookie is just that, a cookie. Two crunchy chocolate outer pieces sandwiching a layer of creamy white...creamy stuff. Nothing more, nothing less.

Next, "They sexify whoever eats them." not true. Otherwise, I'd most likely have my own personal harem by now.

Lastly, just take it at face value. An extremely tasty, and errily addictive cookie snack.

Now, if you'll excuse me, I must finish watching this hilarious flash toon, "Dad's Home."

Goodbye.[/QUOTE]
Dude this thread was meant for awesomeness, not anti-awesomeness.
(aka its a joke)

I think that oreos are as awesome... as a supernova because there are no other cookies like them.,.. That are black and have... white... filling...
Did you know: They have oreo stacking CONTESTS!?!??! yeah I got like 15... but someone got like 50. yeha I felt bad about myself then.

Oreos are just plain goodness. They go well in or on ice cream, by themselves, in milk, to compliment chicken, to beautify our pantries, to serve as a boredom reducer... there are billions of different things oreos are great for.



Oh, and yeah, theyre "America's Favorite Cookie."
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Guest Midnight Rush
[QUOTE=Falkon]Dude this thread was meant for awesomeness, not anti-awesomeness.
(aka its a joke)

I think that oreos are as awesome... as a supernova because there are no other cookies like them.,.. That are black and have... white... filling...
Did you know: They have oreo stacking CONTESTS!?!??! yeah I got like 15... but someone got like 50. yeha I felt bad about myself then.

Oreos are just plain goodness. They go well in or on ice cream, by themselves, in milk, to compliment chicken, to beautify our pantries, to serve as a boredom reducer... there are billions of different things oreos are great for.



Oh, and yeah, theyre "America's Favorite Cookie."[/QUOTE]

50 you say? interesting.... I've gotten to like 14-15..not 50 holy crap...

America's fav. cookie.... CLUB!

The Oreo Siggy Club! All Oreo lovers join immediately!
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[COLOR=DarkRed][SIZE=1]
[quote name='Falkon']Did you know: They have oreo stacking CONTESTS!?!??! yeah I got like 15... but someone got like 50. yeha I felt bad about myself then.[/quote]
Find me hot; I stacked 28.

[quote name='ChibiHorsewoman][COLOR=DarkOrchid']But if you already have teh one you love I guess a sugar high could help produce some pretty good sack sessions since I guess sugar and chocolate produce endorphines. I think[/COLOR][/quote]
It does! Chocolate makes you secrete endorphins thus producing a feeling comparable to an opium high. Correct me if I'm wrong but I heard it also contains some substance which the brain uses to produce serotonin, inducing feelings of euphoria. Add to that the sugar content of the whole Oreo cookie and you've got one happy (and frisky) bunny. Very sexy.

[quote name='Midnight Rush']Does anyone drink Coke and Oj (Seperate glasses) with them like me?[/quote]
*winces* And you dunk the cookie where?

[/SIZE][/COLOR]
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[QUOTE=eternity][Quote:
Originally Posted by Midnight Rush]
Does anyone drink Coke and Oj (Seperate glasses) with them like me?


*winces* And you dunk the cookie where?[/quote]

XD

Drink with coke and OJ??? HAHAHA I don't even like Coke. But no, I find my cookies more satisfying with... water, actually. Wait... yeah thats because I dont like milk to begin with, soooo yeah. No.

And the secreting endorphins thing? wow, looks like america has stumbled upon another drug. OOOh get this: bananas:

[QUOTE]
BANANAS
After reading this You will NEVER look at a banana in the same
way
again !

Bananas. Containing three natural sugars - sucrose, fructose and
glucose
combined with fiber, a banana gives an instant, sustained and
substantial
boost ofenergy. Research has proven that just two bananas provide
enough
energy for a strenuous 90-minute workout. No wonder the banana is the
number one fruit with the world's leading athletes. But energy isn't
the
only way a banana can help us keep fit. It can also help overcome or
prevent a substantial number of illnesses and conditions, making it a
must
to add to our daily diet.

Depression: According to a recent survey undertaken by MIND amongst
people
suffering from depression, many felt much better after eating a banana.
This

is because bananas contain tryptophan, a type of protein that the body
converts into serotonin, known to make you relax, improve your mood and
generally make you feel happier.

PMS: Forget the pills - eat a banana. The vitamin B6 it contains
regulates

blood glucose levels, which can affect your mood.

Anemia: High in iron, bananas can stimulate the production of
hemoglobin in
the blood and so helps in cases of anemia.

Blood Pressure: This unique tropical fruit is extremely high in
potassium
yet low in salt, making it the perfect to beat blood pressure. So
much so,

the US Food and Drug Administration has just allowed the banana
industry to
make official claims for the fruit's ability to reduce the risk of
blood
pressure and stroke.

Brain Power: 200 students at a Twickenham (Middlesex) school were
helped
through their exams this year by eating bananas at breakfast, break,
and
lunch in a bid to boost their brain power. Research has shown that the
potassium-packed fruit can assist lear ning by making pupils more
alert.

Constipation: High in fiber, including bananas in the diet can help
restore
normal bowel action, helping to overcome the problem without resorting
to
laxatives.

Hangovers: One of the quickest ways of curing a hangover is to make a
banana

milkshake, sweetened with honey. The banana calms the stomach and, with
the
help of the honey, builds up depleted blood sugar levels, while the
milk
soothes and re-hydrates your system.

Heartburn: Bananas have a natural antacid effect in the body, so if you
suffer from heartburn, try eating a banana for soothing relief.

Morning Sickness: Snacking on bananas between meals helps to keep blood
sugar levels up and avoid morning sickness.

Mosquito bites: Before reaching for the insect bite cream, try rubbing
the
affected area with the inside of a banana skin. Many people find it
amazingly successful at reducing swelling and irritation.

Nerves: Bananas are high in B vitamins that help calm the nervous
system.

Overweight and at work? Studies at the Institute of Psychology in
Austria
found pressure at work leads to gorging on comfort food like chocolate
and
chips. Looking at 5,000 hospital patients, researchers found the most
obese

were more likely to be in high-pressure jobs. The report concluded
that, to
avoid panic-induced food cravings, we need to control our blood sugar
levels

by snacking on high carbohydrate foods every two hours to keep levels
steady.

Ulcers: The banana is used as the dietary food against intestinal
disorders
because of its soft texture and smoothness. It is the only raw fruit
that
can be eaten without distress in over-chronicler cases. It also
neutralizes
over-acidity and reduces irritation by coating the lining of the
stomach.

Temperature control: Many other cultures see bananas as a "cooling"
fruit
that can lower both the physical and emotion al temperature of
expectant
mothers. In Thailand, for example, pregnant women eat bananas to
ensure
their baby is born with a cool temperature.


Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD): Bananas can help SAD sufferers
because
they contain the natural mood enhancer, tryptophan.

Smoking: Bananas can also help people trying to give up smoking. The
B6,
B12 they contain, as well as the potassium and magnesium found in
them,
help the body recover from the effects of nicotine withdrawal.

Stress: Potassium is a vital mineral, which helps normalize the
heartbeat,
sends oxygen to the brain and regulates your body's water balance.
When we
are stressed, our metabolic rate rises, thereby reducing our potassium
levels. These can be rebalanced with the help of a high-potassium
banana
snack.

Snacks: According to research in "The New England Journal of
Medicine,"eating bananas as part of a regular diet can cut the risk of
death

by strokes by as much as 40% !

Warts: Those keen on natural alternatives swear that if you want to
kill off

a wart, take a piece of banana skin and place it on the wart, with the
yellow side out. Carefully hold the skin in place with a plaster or
surgical tape!

So, a banana really is a natural remedy for many ills ! When you
compare it

to an apple, it has four times the protein, twice the carbohydrate,
three
times the phosphorus, five times the vitamin A and iron, and twice the
other

vitamins and minerals. It is also rich in potassium and is one of the
best
value foods around. So maybe its time to change that well-known phrase
so
that we say,

"A banana a day keeps the doctor away!"

A new illicit drug for america ;)
[/quote]

Sorry, I know that had nothing to do with the sheer sexiness of oreos, but since I got onto the topic of oreos being Americas new Illicit drugs, I figured I might as well mention this!
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[quote name='ChibiHorsewoman][color=darkviolet']I guess a sugar high could help produce some pretty good sack sessions since I guess sugar and chocolate produce endorphines. I think[/color][/quote]

That was terrible.


Sugar induced giddyness/highs take you so far up...

And are considerably short, and you fall hard in the end, as the engery obtained from candies/cookies doesnt last long in your system. Eat enough processed sugar and you get sick.

*points to above post*


The energy from fruit lasts longer and keeps you level, instead of the up and down roller-coaster of candies and such.

Which is why fruit is more recommended to athletes.
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