Pre-martial sex.

[chobit]

Ok,even though I'm young,and probably had the chance a couple of times,I haven't had sex.Bloody hell,I'm 15(almost).However,most of my friends are sexually "active",and they're always talking about it,and I feel weird 'cause I've decided to wait.Not neccesarily until I'm married,but until I find someone I really,really love(but might not be able to have).They think its really strange.

Is it?Your opinions and comments if you will.

[Muad'Dib]

[FONT=Palatino Linotype][COLOR=DarkOliveGreen]Absolutely not. It's not strange at all! It's probably the best thing to do to wait. But I'm not gonna preach about what all the health teachers drill into our heads... cause all of us already know that.

Looking at things from a completely naturalistic point of view, humans have sex strictly for reproduction. But being sentient, it means something deeper than that to us. Not just pleasure - but even deeper. Love, quite simply. For some people (whom I have great respect for) love is what it's all about. Besides reproduction that is.

You should be proud that you've made the decision to wait. I congradulate you, and give you my respect. ^_^

I've decided to wait for love myself, but there's kind of a long story that goes with that...[/COLOR][/FONT]

[DeathKnight]

[color=crimson]I think it's totally up to you. Some are bound by culture, religion and otherwise, but beyond that it is just up to you. Make a choice, think on it, etc.

Anyone who condemns you for any choice you make in that regard is, probably, idiotic. Now, I don't condone anyone who sleeps with anyone they can as often as possible [I view that to be disrespectful, not on a personal level but.. yeah] but you clearly don't wish anything of the sort- quite the opposite, in fact.

So, I think that's fine. Not "weird" or anything like that. You do what you view best for you. Your friends do what they view is best for them. Don't give in to any pressure they might put on you to change what you feel is the best course of action.[/color]

[James P. Galvatron]

Me myself I am 15 turned August 18th 2004. I haven't had sex either I don't why I have never taken the chance at it.
I myself am not waiting for marriage and usually guys aren't about love being involved with sex sex is just sex to a guy a right of passage while to a girl it usually means much more.

To me its inbetween really I don't think there is a such thing as love in highschool its just two people making out or dancing together usually they are just dating one another cause the other is real hot or pretty not because they are in love maybe thats just in my city I dont know.

[Guest ScirosDarkblade]

Pre-martial sex, eh?

Well, I'm all for some good mattress magic before going off to war. I think all warring nations should prepare for battle with city-wide orgies, porn festivals, and generally lewd public behavior.

A happy soldier is a good soldier.

[future girl]

[QUOTE=ScirosDarkblade]Pre-martial sex, eh?

Well, I'm all for some good mattress magic before going off to war. I think all warring nations should prepare for battle with city-wide orgies, porn festivals, and generally lewd public behavior.

A happy soldier is a good soldier.[/QUOTE]

::giggles:: I was thinking the same thing.

However, onto the intended topic at hand, I don't plan on waiting until I get married, but I also don't plan on sleeping with more than one person. When I was much younger the idea of having one partner for the rest of my life was a bit off putting, but it's a lot more appealing now. Mostly because with one person there's endless possibilities and the more you need to start over the less things you try and know... at least in my mind. To me marriage doesn't hold the importance that some people give it and while I understand why they do, it's not something that I view as definitive or romantic. In the end though, it's a personal thing and nothing should pressure you into thinking differently.

[Adahn]

Hmm, pre-marital sex, eh? Well, here's how it is. The only people who tell you it's a problem will be Christians or people that have had bad experiences with it. If two people are in love and of a healthy age, why shouldn't they? If you do happen to have pre-marital sex, there are two types.

1. Fornication: If you have sex just because you like it, and you don't care who you do it with, you're fornicating. Yay...

2. Making love: If you have sex with someone you love, that's good and everything. However, once you have sex with that person, you might as well consider yourselves married, because if either of you have sex with any other person, you're fornicating again.

I personally would only have sex with someone I loved, and following that consider myself bonded to them. I would consider myself to be committing adultery if I slept with anyone else. I would also consider it adultery if she slept with anyone else. It's not legally binding at all, but as my religion and morals go, nothing could be more permanent.

[Guest Midnight Rush]

I'm the opposite of Sciros, bedroom billiards is amazing AFTER the war. I'm coming back from fighting..and now a wonderful ******* is waiting.

Lovely.

[DeathBug]

If you had sex, would you be able to accept all the possible complications that could result from it?

If you can't, you shouldn't be having it.

If you don't want to have sex, then don't. I honestly don't see any good that could come from it at age 15 anyway. You're not weird; you just see the issue in a different light than your friends. Power to you.

[Pumpkin]

[FONT=Verdana][SIZE=1]
Whatever you do, DO NOT have sex when you are not ready. I'm not lieing when you said you will regret it. One of my friends started having sex when she was 14, to me, that was too young and I couldn't believe she could do such a thing but hey she was ready. I wasn't. Some people are just ready to go that extra level when their younger, but alot are just under pressure and do it to be "cool" or make themselves "fit in". I see it happen all the time, Sex in Highschool is hard because there are so many complications that come with it, and not everyone really thinks of the risks. Yeah, people talk about it, but does that really matter? does you being able to talk about stuff really make you any different? lol no. You have to not let it bother you, otherwise others will not respect you and your decision. Its tough, especially for guys, to be one. But I seriously think you should wait until your ready, and you found someone you know well and atleast really like. (I dont think you have to LOVE someone just be atleast comfortable with them). You dont want to look back on bad memories and go "Why the hell did I do that?". [/FONT][/SIZE]

[ChibiHorsewoman]

[color=darkviolet]I'm not sure how unbiased of an opinion I can give since I've only had sex with one person albeit before I married the guy, but still...

I don't think that pre-marital sex is a bad thing just as long as you don't feel pressured to just do it and you're both responsible with your actions. Also you should recognize the consequences of your actions and be able to accept them.

That said I'll give you fair warning, first time sex is usually very awkward no matter who you are. Don't expect to have everything be so magical and perfect. It's strange, you're seeing this person naked for the first time (probably) and they're also seeing you naked for the first time. It'll still be a memorable moment, but be prepared to have to laugh at a few things and get slightly red in the face.

well anyways, that's my $.02 take it or leave it.

~*~Chibi~*~[/color]

[Cyriel]

Just wait. Don't have sex just to join the bandwagon - that's no reason at all. Um, I don't know if this might sound weird, but have you tried talking to your parents about it? That might help. I mean, yes, they might blow, but just phrase it the right way. And I know the "sex talk" is supposedly very embarrassing, but I think communicating with the folks is pretty important on this subject too.

As for personal opinion, I don't think that I'd have sex before marriage. It just depends on your morals and beliefs, and that's how I was raised I guess. But I would really really really really recommend to you to wait, because you don't want to regret something you did, especially not now.

[Baron Samedi]

[size=1]Sciros beat me to it...what I was gonna say was that it's best to get in all the jollies you can, before martial law is set down, and you need to apply to do it >_>

Heh. Anyway, I saw a party invitation today, which said 'Justin only turns 18 once'. And you'll only ever have one first time. If you're lucky you'll have lots afterwards, but there'll only be one first time.

And you shouldn't throw it away just because everyone else is. I think 16 is about the right age for sex. Any younger than that and...well, yeah o_O If your friends are [i]really[/i] sexually active, well... what can I say?[/size]

[Immortal Meier]

it's up to you..nobody had the right to tell you if it's good or bad..if you trust in virginity till you find the one you love you have to wait (like i had done..waiting for the girl i love now)..
i think that the first experience must be done with someone who loves you and you love him..

[Afire]

[QUOTE=ChibiHorsewoman][color=darkviolet]
That said I'll give you fair warning, first time sex is usually very awkward no matter who you are. Don't expect to have everything be so magical and perfect. It's strange, you're seeing this person naked for the first time (probably) and they're also seeing you naked for the first time. It'll still be a memorable moment, but be prepared to have to laugh at a few things and get slightly red in the face.
~*~Chibi~*~[/color][/QUOTE]
[FONT=Comic Sans MS][SIZE=3][COLOR=Purple]I'm sure you're totally right there Chibi, even though I've never had sex! LOL!

I also think that even the awkwardness would be part of the pleasure if you really loved that person and they loved you. Awkwardness with someone you didn't actually love would not be so sweet...whether it was the first time, or the last.[/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT]

[James P. Galvatron]

[QUOTE=Pumpkin][FONT=Verdana][SIZE=1]
Whatever you do, DO NOT have sex when you are not ready. I'm not lieing when you said you will regret it. One of my friends started having sex when she was 14, to me, that was too young and I couldn't believe she could do such a thing but hey she was ready. I wasn't. Some people are just ready to go that extra level when their younger, but alot are just under pressure and do it to be "cool" or make themselves "fit in". I see it happen all the time, and yes being a senior (and a virgin myself. haha yes i know it's funny >.<) I've chosen not too (*cough* not to mention i would never have sex with perverted teenage boy. sorry guys too immature for me :D ) have sex in Highschool because there are so many complications that come with it, and not everyone really thinks of the risks. Yeah, people talk about it, but does that really matter? does you being able to talk about stuff really make you any different? lol no. You have to not let it bother you, otherwise others will not respect you and your decision. Its tough, especially for guys, to be one. But I seriously think you should wait until your ready, and you found someone you know well and atleast really like. (I dont think you have to LOVE someone just be atleast comfortable with them). You dont want to look back on bad memories and go "Why the hell did I do that?". [/FONT][/SIZE][/QUOTE]


I am not Immature I may be a Teenage 15 year old boy who is a sophmore and available to everyone.

All I have to say is that I don't know when I will be ready and I really don't believe it will be that akward as you say so I will see someone naked "maybe" for the first time it won't ruin the moment for me, but I know it won't be magical I mean its gotta hurt for a girl the first time I mean comeon just thinking about whats about to happen to you.

[Pumpkin]

[QUOTE=Inuyasha7271]I am not Immature I may be a Teenage 15 year old boy who is a sophmore and available to everyone.

All I have to say is that I don't know when I will be ready and I really don't believe it will be that akward as you say so I will see someone naked "maybe" for the first time it won't ruin the moment for me, but I know it won't be magical I mean its gotta hurt for a girl the first time I mean comeon just thinking about whats about to happen to you.[/QUOTE]

[FONT=Verdana][SIZE=1] :p erm i was just joking bout the teenage boy thing...I know not all teenage guys are, but yeah thats just my personal preference. Not all younger guys are immature.(Not alot of girls go for younger guys even if they are mature ;( it's sad but true) as for the awkwardness thing..even the most confident guy can feel awkward, if its the first naked body you've seen, yeah it will be because you dont know what your doing and its a new situation and thing you've never done before. :eek: And yea girls feel pain. lucky us. [/FONT][/SIZE]

[Muad'Dib]

[quote name='Pumpkin][FONT=Verdana][SIZE=1] And yea girls feel pain. lucky us. [/FONT'][/SIZE][/quote]

[FONT=Trebuchet MS][COLOR=DarkSlateBlue]Um, concerning that. I feel stupid asking, obviously, but I'm also very curious. As any guy would be I'm sure... asking any girl in the thread that has already ahd sex, how much pain do you go through? Putting this in blunt terms, it's gotta hurt like hell... but I'm wondering. Hmm, if it's not off-topic that is. I'm gonna shut up now.[/COLOR][/FONT]

[chobit]

[quote name='Kyuai][FONT=Trebuchet MS][COLOR=DarkSlateBlue]Um, concerning that. I feel stupid asking, obviously, but I'm also very curious. As any guy would be I'm sure... asking any girl in the thread that has already ahd sex, how much pain do you go through? Putting this in blunt terms, it's gotta hurt like hell... but I'm wondering. Hmm, if it's not off-topic that is. I'm gonna shut up now.[/COLOR'][/FONT][/quote]
Though I haven't had sex(er,obviously,I made this thread)my best friend described me it in detail,and [I]she[/I] said it didn't hurt.She said it was sort of jolt,just because it was different.Sorry,thats all I can offer.

[James P. Galvatron]

I figured so Chobits girls have to feel something; myself I don't consider myself immature and I know alot about what happens in sex but as they say you learn more from experience than you could from someone like your parents, friends, or magazines.

Like I would ask my mom this anyway she would like freak out at me.

I am very mature for my age unlike most guys who happened to think about sex constantly and other things myself I think about girls but never ina negatory or nasty thing, but in a daily observing way.

[Guest Midnight Rush]

Look,

It is my belief that sex should be held until marriage, for two reasons. The primary is that relationships are in 4 different categories:

Long and Shallow

Short and Shallow

Long and Deep

Short and Deep

99.9999% of relationships are the first three. Although it [i]is[/i] possible for two mature, experienced, and older adults to have a short and deep relationship, most people aren't going to accomplish that.

The reason I bring this up is, when you have sex with someone, that person sticks with you, whether you know it or not, for the rest of your life. You can block out their memory, you can even forget its their, but it is still there. If I am going to bind my life to one woman exclusively, I want her to be the only person that I have in me.

I believe in perfect sex. What I mean by the term is, that the two people unite not only in body, but in mind and spirit as well. I personally want to achieve that, but I don't feel I could having even a lingering memory of another woman in my mind. I don't want experience with random chicks from bars to interfere with intimacy in marriage.

The second reason is this: I am a HUGE Jesus fan. In fact He is probably the biggest influence in my life, and He really isn't into extra and pre marital sex. I tend to at least try to share His opinions.

[Afire]

[QUOTE=Midnight Rush]
The reason I bring this up is, when you have sex with someone, that person sticks with you, whether you know it or not, for the rest of your life. You can block out their memory, you can even forget its their, but it is still there. If I am going to bind my life to one woman exclusively, I want her to be the only person that I have in me.

I believe in perfect sex. What I mean by the term is, that the two people unite not only in body, but in mind and spirit as well. I personally want to achieve that, but I don't feel I could having even a lingering memory of another woman in my mind. I don't want experience with random chicks from bars to interfere with intimacy in marriage.[/QUOTE]
[FONT=Comic Sans MS][SIZE=3][COLOR=Purple]I pretty much agree with you here,
Midnight Rush [/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT]

[QUOTE=Midnight Rush]
The second reason is this: I am a HUGE Jesus fan. In fact He is probably the biggest influence in my life, and He really isn't into extra and pre marital sex. I tend to at least try to share His opinions.[/QUOTE]

[FONT=Comic Sans MS][SIZE=3][COLOR=Purple]Were Adam and Eve married? If they were, it was by God, whom I believe to be Love. I also believe that Christ IS God, as well as Love. Is it not what Love has joined together, that no man should put asunder? Many people are married in a church without love. So I don't think that legal marriage has anything to do with marriage of the heart.[/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT]

[ChibiHorsewoman]

[quote name='Kyuai][FONT=Trebuchet MS][COLOR=DarkSlateBlue]Um, concerning that. I feel stupid asking, obviously, but I'm also very curious. As any guy would be I'm sure... asking any girl in the thread that has already ahd sex, how much pain do you go through? Putting this in blunt terms, it's gotta hurt like hell... but I'm wondering. Hmm, if it's not off-topic that is. I'm gonna shut up now.[/COLOR'][/FONT][/quote]

[color=darkviolet]Let's see how can I explain this... oh yeah from what I've heard and experianced I guess the pain is different for different women. It didn't hurt liek hell my first time. There was a bit of a twinge at first, but it wasn't excutiating or anything like that.I think if it hurt that badly nobody would do it a second time. i'm almost wondering if part of the reason it hurts so much your first time is because you tend to tense up a bit. I hope I'm not being too graphic for anyone.

And incase anyone is wondering, yes it hurts after you haven't done it in a while either. I haven't quite figured out why yet. And I've also heard from my friends who have been pregnant as well as a few books on pregnancy that post pregnancy sex hurts too.

So uh yeah, I hope that helped.

~*~Chibi~*~[/color]

[wrist cutter]

[QUOTE=Inuyasha7271]
I am very mature for my age unlike most guys who happened to think about sex constantly and other things myself I think about girls but never ina negatory or nasty thing, but in a daily observing way.[/QUOTE]

The most ironic thing about this statement is that in saying it, he hopes to impress girls and eventually land them in bed. Well done my friend.

[James P. Galvatron]

[quote name='wrist cutter']The most ironic thing about this statement is that in saying it, he hopes to impress girls and eventually land them in bed. Well done my friend.[/quote]


Now wristcutter how did that help the forum by you posting that it was nothing more but a waste of typing.

that statement is not ironic nor is it to impress anyone and land them in bed if I wanted to do that I would say that to girls in real life not ones on a site I will probably never see so how in the world would I get them in the bed.

Think about that before you run your mealy mouth wrist cutter.