Guest Sean Posted February 1, 2005 Share Posted February 1, 2005 [CENTER][IMG]http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v450/Kyo-Sean/aotw-prelude.jpg[/IMG] [u]Admin Of The Web-Rings[/u] [B][Prelude] [/B] Hello there fellow traveller, well I don?t know if you?re a traveller or not, you?re probably just sitting in your house or a local net café. So if you?re a traveller or not then hello, and welcome to the newest OB Parody on the block. Yes, another story for you to engross your mind in for a good while, and whilst you read this I?ll be slaving over a keyboard to get this to you. Yeah be happy your privileged, what if I decide I don?t like your cocky attitude, because you get to sit and read this whilst I had to face it! Huh! Yeah you, but I?ve begun, and an old man like me gets weary at times, so I?ll begin. In the land of Internus Exploria there was forged magical several billion magical web rings. Each one given to the leader of these fandoms. And they were passed through into the land of Mozillaka, and Freefax. But Netscapa never received any for there crimes of making sites look pretty mucked up. So in the Browser of Netscapa they forged a master web ring. I link to rule them all, one link to find them, one link to bring them all, and in the darkness merge them. The lamest line I have ever had the pleasure of writing. The first ring made was given to the Desbreko Zelda fandom, where he ruled over all others with a Master Sword. The second given to Zidargh for the Square-Enix fandom, where he ruled over others with a Buster Sword. And one more, yeah I can?t be bothered writing all billion of them or this would be more than my hard drives worth of GB, so the third was given to Nomad for the biggest appeal to Rammstein Internus Exploria has ever seen, he ruled over his web ring with a Flamethrower attached to his mouth. And then?all was good. All the fandoms and web rings lived in there domains of Internus Exploria, Mozillaka and Freefax. But hidden deep in the depths of Netscapa the Dark Lord Alan was binding, forging a master ring. The one web-ring to link them all. So the Zelda fans and the FF fans and the well every fan in the 3 kingdoms lived happy lives, and never knew anything about this master web-ring. But still he plotted, the Dark Lord Alan building his forces of n00bs. For that n00b hunter put them into imprisonment, and taught them how to be vicious but still be under his command. The perfect plot. Then Alan struck, Freefax was the first kingdom to fall to the power of the web-ring, joining it as soon as it launched. The web-ring ruled over Netscapa and Freefax, and he went onto attack the other kingdoms. Mozillika fell next, after some of the web-rings sent out One Winged Angels, Links, Uma Thurman?s, and Trinity, it still fell as each web-ring joined with the one web-ring. Then it happened, the last alliance of Newbies and Oldies joined together, and the war of the web-ring started. Newbies catapulting advanced learning and rules pages at the hordes of n00bs, and Oldies just astounding the n00bs by there superior knowledge of everything. The n00bs were about to fall, but then the Dark Lord Alan appeared from underneath a shrubbery. Yes a shrubbery, what he was doing in this shrubbery is unknown and/or classified information held by God. Yeah God, so ask him, like he would tell you, probably too pornographic for children. But he appeared anyway, and is his mighty web ring link glowed on his metallic black fingers. The Oldies of the worlds remembered when Alan was just a good ol? Freelance Web Designer, but Anakin pulled him over to the Dark Side. [Alan: ANAKIN? What The Hell? Stop going Star Wars in a LOTR spoof, moron!] Ehm?yeah. So Anakin and his amazing force powers pulled him over to evil, where he magically got transported to another kingdom. And then read over all of that and that?s how and why he made the web-ring. But on with this parody. So the old members stood in awe as the mightiness of the Freelance Web Designed/Dark Lord stood over them with his Velegant Hosting. He had so much more web space to work with than the regulars. Dark Lord Alan walked through the gibbering n00bs, kicking a few for grabbing onto his shiny boots. ?oOohH 5hIn3y!!!!!!11? a n00b proclaimed as it hit him in the mouth. Then Lady Asphyxia walked out from the fight, her hair blown back by the winds that have suddenly come upon then. Her Velegant Hosting was to match that of the Dark Lord Alan, both were equally matched, but soon she was joined by Semjazza, he also had hosting to die for, both combined there powers. They ran and attempted an assault on the Dark Lord Alan, but he fired a missile of PHP towards them, they dived but still got it. They decided to fall into the shrubbery, into a milky white mess. Yes, Alan had been drinking milk, a Dark Lord who drank milk? Who has ever seen or heard of a Dark Lord who drank milk? Maybe that Hades guy, but hey look where he is, in a past religion where no-one cares about him. But the Dark Lord, who had a milk moustache now that close up has finally appeared, was firing bolts of L337 codings. PHP was flying like hells fire, and still he fired, and it looked like he was going to win. But then, a lone soldier stood out from underneath a cloak, one of the older members? well he was the oldest. Member number 1 to be exact, number 1 of OB. Alan turned around to see the figure of Keanu Reeves stand in front of him. Yes it was him? [b]?Adam?[/b] Alan scowled. Adam pulled out the awesome-ness of the Founders Admin Rod. And with a gentle flick he sent a ban straight towards Alan, hitting him in his abdomen. Alan smirked. [b]?Banned - ?you?re not coming back to the OB from any region for a good long time Alan.?[/b] Alan screamed as his body fell apart, black PHP pouring out from the wound, and soon the Dark Lord disappeared in a shower of his own coding, the ring falling to the ground. Adam walked over to the ring and put it around his neck. [b]?Getting auctioned on E-bay I tell ya!?[/b] he laughed and walked through the massacre. Back to his lair in OB. Back to his home, back to Admin duties. All was peaceful once again, but then the web-ring fell out of his possession during a card-game. Yes a card game, he thought he had the best of hands, but no, actually knew new nothing about the card game, he thought they were playing ?snap? but no, they weren?t. Poker was the name of the game. But he lost it, and an unknown member took of with the web ring, this member lost it aswell. Yeh he lost it, and it fell into a river, where things that should always be remembered were soon turned into a distant memory, then legend, then myth. And all was forgotten about that one web-ring. But many millenia after, Adam is still around, yes he is. And so are many of the original fight for the web-ring, but they can?t be bothered re-telling the story. Laziness I tell you! But they stopped telling people. But so many millenia after the web-ring war?a member found it. Dragon Warrior. [b]?Where?s the precious??[/b] said Dragon Warrior, rubbing his nipple. Dragon Warrior is not that sexy beast you think his as, no, he has back hair, and grease protruding off his body at all times. Yes, a strange image, but that is what he is. He rubbed his nipple again looking in the mirror. [b]?Am So Sexy!?[/b] he proclaimed again. But I?m not going into much detail about the events after this, but he found the stupid ring, and guess what! He lost it, in a game of?strip poker. Yes the thought is horrible, but instead of letting someone take ?his precious? he threw it into oblivion. Well more like down a hill where young Charles Baggins was sleeping. It knocked him on the head, and he looked down to see the shiny ring. ?Ooooohhh Shiny!? he proclaimed, picking it up. He walked home from his little resting spot down by Anthology Lake. His home being the Admin Box, but Adam has been absent for a long time, so the Site Director has been alone, but we won?t go into the detail about that either. Now Charles has his own son, adopted from his cousin ?Methuselah? and her companion ?Legacy? And Charles brought up this son like his own, he also named his James. And now, Charles is about to celebrate his One Hundred and Eleventieth birthday. [B][End of Prelude][/B][/CENTER] [COLOR=DarkRed][SIZE=1] So what did you think of the Prelude? Yes this is a Lord Of The Rings spoof ~_^ It does say that somewhere in there. But comments and all that shizzle would be loved before I start Chapter 1. Thanks ^__^[/SIZE][/COLOR] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options... DeadSeraphim Posted February 1, 2005 Share Posted February 1, 2005 [COLOR=Indigo][SIZE=1][FONT=Arial]This'd work better if you were more focussed, I think. Mayhap you can work on that in Chapter 1? ;) Otherwise it's pretty good, if you can work through the unfocussed bits. =P [/FONT][/SIZE][/COLOR] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options... Lady Asphyxia Posted February 2, 2005 Share Posted February 2, 2005 [font=Verdana][size=1]Alan's correct; being more focussed in this will certainly improve it. At some points you go of on tangents [like the; A dark lord drinking milk?] and perhaps have more description instead of telling us what happened. [/size][/font] [font=Verdana][size=1][/size][/font] [font=Verdana][size=1]This stands out to me in this paragraph:[/size][/font] [font=Verdana][/font] [font=Verdana][size=1][i]Then Lady Asphyxia walked out from the fight, her hair blown back by the winds that have suddenly come upon then. Her Velegant Hosting was to match that of the Dark Lord Alan, both were equally matched, but soon she was joined by Semjazza, he also had hosting to die for, both combined there powers. They ran and attempted an assault on the Dark Lord Alan, but he fired a missile of PHP towards them, they dived but still got it. They decided to fall into the shrubbery, into a milky white mess. Yes, Alan had been drinking milk, a Dark Lord who drank milk? Who has ever seen or heard of a Dark Lord who drank milk? Maybe that Hades guy, but hey look where he is, in a past religion where no-one cares about him.[/i][/size][/font] [i][font=Verdana][size=1][/size][/font][/i] [font=Verdana][size=1]You use quite a few 'then' words here, which makes it seem that it's quite more a "Then they went to school. At school they went to class". Don't tell us what happened, [i]show[/i] us, heh. [/size][/font] [font=Verdana][size=1][/size][/font] [font=Verdana][size=1]But yeah, not a bad story. ^_^" *is impressed*[/size][/font] [font=Verdana][size=1][/size][/font] [font=Verdana][size=1]*waits for the next chapter*[/size][/font] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options... Create an account or sign in to comment You need to be a member in order to leave a comment Create an account Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy! Register a new account Sign in Already have an account? Sign in here. Sign In Now Share More sharing options... Followers 0
DeadSeraphim Posted February 1, 2005 Share Posted February 1, 2005 [COLOR=Indigo][SIZE=1][FONT=Arial]This'd work better if you were more focussed, I think. Mayhap you can work on that in Chapter 1? ;) Otherwise it's pretty good, if you can work through the unfocussed bits. =P [/FONT][/SIZE][/COLOR] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lady Asphyxia Posted February 2, 2005 Share Posted February 2, 2005 [font=Verdana][size=1]Alan's correct; being more focussed in this will certainly improve it. At some points you go of on tangents [like the; A dark lord drinking milk?] and perhaps have more description instead of telling us what happened. [/size][/font] [font=Verdana][size=1][/size][/font] [font=Verdana][size=1]This stands out to me in this paragraph:[/size][/font] [font=Verdana][/font] [font=Verdana][size=1][i]Then Lady Asphyxia walked out from the fight, her hair blown back by the winds that have suddenly come upon then. Her Velegant Hosting was to match that of the Dark Lord Alan, both were equally matched, but soon she was joined by Semjazza, he also had hosting to die for, both combined there powers. They ran and attempted an assault on the Dark Lord Alan, but he fired a missile of PHP towards them, they dived but still got it. They decided to fall into the shrubbery, into a milky white mess. Yes, Alan had been drinking milk, a Dark Lord who drank milk? Who has ever seen or heard of a Dark Lord who drank milk? Maybe that Hades guy, but hey look where he is, in a past religion where no-one cares about him.[/i][/size][/font] [i][font=Verdana][size=1][/size][/font][/i] [font=Verdana][size=1]You use quite a few 'then' words here, which makes it seem that it's quite more a "Then they went to school. At school they went to class". Don't tell us what happened, [i]show[/i] us, heh. [/size][/font] [font=Verdana][size=1][/size][/font] [font=Verdana][size=1]But yeah, not a bad story. ^_^" *is impressed*[/size][/font] [font=Verdana][size=1][/size][/font] [font=Verdana][size=1]*waits for the next chapter*[/size][/font] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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