My friend has a boyfriend who's slowly going alcoholic

[ChibiHorsewoman]

[color=darkviolet]This really is a question about a friend of mine. HSe's my best friend, we've known eachother for ten years and have been through all sorts of stuff together.

She's been with her boyfriend for almost two years and they have a daughter who'll be 1 at the end of the month. She knew that he'd had both drug and alcohol problems before they started dating, but he'd gone to rehab and AA like a responsible guy who wants to get his life back on track.

However, his whole job thing has been a bit slow lately (he does mason work and it's the middle of winter here) so he's been on and off of work. He's also been starting to drink again. I don't mean like a beer here or there I mean he brings home a 40 OZ and drinks that. He's also gotten drunk while he's supposed to be watching their daughter while my friend is at work. Not good since she's only 11 months old.

Other than that though, he's a really great person . He doesn't hit her or the baby, and he stayed with her even though she had gotten pregnant right after they got together.

So, any advice please?[/color]

[Guest Alchemist]

Alchol is often used as an escape from reality. He is probaly going under scrutney from others and is getting away from it by drinking. He shouldnt get drunk when he is watching his daughter but i cant blame him for drinking :confused:

[Sango905]

[FONT=Verdana]xxx[/FONT] [COLOR=Purple]xxx[/COLOR] Okay, I think your friend should try to talk to him and see what is makeing him drink. And, if she does find out the problem she should decide what to do from there :)

[Frankie]

[color=red]Ok... My father started drinking when he was i think in his teens. He is 60 something now. He was always drinking... He always had a drink in his hand. He wasnt himself but i didnt know that because he was always drinking since i was born so i was used to this behavior. He was there but wasnt there if you understand what I mean. He would be there physically but not mentally.[/color]
[color=red][/color]
[color=red]Me and him argued and argued like crazy and he always smelled like alcohol.[/color]
[color=red][/color]
[color=red]Now he did it because he has since he was young, His mother is unbearable, and me and him argued alot because he was drinking so he drank more to get over the arguments.[/color]
[color=red][/color]
[color=red]Of course one day I came home from school and he was spaced out. He was staring off into space nad had tears in his eyes. I asked what was wrong but he wouldnt answer me. I went and Hit in my room like I normally did and when my sister got home things went better. Dad admitted to knowing he had a problem and spent a whole month in serenity lane.[/color]
[color=red][/color]
[color=red]Now... its been three or four years now that he hasnt been drinking which is fantastic but anyways.[/color]
[color=red][/color]
[color=red]I just realized I havent given any advice *sigh* Im not very usefull ill admit....[/color]
[color=red][/color]
[color=red]Anyways... 1 out of 10 people who quit drinking will stay sober... Its not very good odds but... My dad runs one of the AA meetings... He has told me more than once that most of all the people that come into treatment and quit drinking will all go back.[/color]
[color=red][/color]
[color=red]Counseling might help but it depends on the person. If soemone doesnt want to quit drinking you cant really make them stop... It causes problems trying to stop someones drinking. Iv seen people get divorces because the wife wouldnt let him drink... She would keep all the money, keep his car keys, and even dump any alcohol she could find but it didnt stop him... so they split up. It caused chaos for their kids too.[/color]
[color=red][/color]
[color=red]I dont really have much advice but like others have said maybe your friend should talk with him and try to work out something that could possibly help...[/color]

[Pumpkin]

[FONT=Times New Roman][SIZE=2]First of all, let me say I'm sorry to hear about that since Drinking can be a serious and easy problem to get into. In my family there are alot of Alcholics so I know where your coming from. I've tried to get someone to stop smoking before, and it took me awhile to finally get it. It's not up to me to change it, first the person has to realize that they have a problem to actually seek in the help they receive. You cannot force someone to change, they have to do it on their own. You can push them in the right direction, but you'll never know how that will end up. Only advice I can give you is to hopefully give your friend's boyfriend a hint that he has a problem. Maybe then he'll get the idea. I really Hope everything works out for the best.[/SIZE][/FONT]