Writing The Legend of Dave: Death and all that follows(m-lv)

[Nothing]

Alright, I'm going to jump in on this a few chapters in, because the first two are just bloody boring :sleep: so here's what you'll be missing:

Dave was a soldier in Troy, just before it was taken over by Ulysseus and the Sparatens (don't know how to spell...) He's a writer, and tends to slack off on patrol. He's engaged to a woman named Sophia, and the story starts the day before the soldiers of Troy find the trojan horse, their downfall. That night, David, forgetting to lock the doors of their small house, is killed in his sleep. :animecry: Sophia manages to kill his killer, and then flees the city. But remember, this is the legend of Dave. :animestun

David's story really begins when he finds himself at the gates of the underworld, already dead. He arrives surrounded by other dead soldiers who were also killed in their sleep, but Dave is different: While the other soldiers who were killed will be tossed in a pile and burned, Sophia manages to sneak back into Troy to grab Dave's corpse, gather some of his belongings, and two gold coins, which means Dave has a proper burial.

Here's some roman mythology for you, so you can see why this is so important: In the Underworld, the dead are greated by the ferryman Charon, who will ferry them across the river Acheron, for a small price of two gold coins. Those without a proper burial and no boat fare, must wad a hundred years in another river, The Styx.

So, knowing that Dave will be burried, Charon singles him out and goes with him to find his coffin, which winds up somewhere in the Underworld when Sophia burries him. With me so far? Good. Now we go into the story, where Charon and Dave are in the boat. David's mourning for himself, and Charon's damn impatient. :animeangr

[U]CHAPTER 3: Marcus, the artist formally known as Charon[/U]
(PS Dave=David & Charon=Marcus)

David sat in silence for what seemed like hours. He wasn't truly sad that he had died, only that he now had to face eternal torture. Really, he was more upset about ending up down in the Underworld, rather then in the Elyssian Fields(kinda like heaven). After all, he hadn't commited any major sins; he never killed, he never cheated on Sophia, he never stole anything valuable, he never attacked or turned on his neighbor, in fact by every right he should be basking in the warm sun, instead of freezing to death mourning himself into a stuppor down here with a crotchety old ferry man in a river that looked like gelatin mossy crap.

After perhaps one more hour, he decided he should at least try to speak to this Charon fellow, he might be able to find out what he did wrong. "Eh, Charon, was it?" David asked. The ferryman looked back from the tip of the boat, keeping one eye focused on the river ahead. "Beh, that's not my name. Some idiot up there decided to name me after a bloomen comet, or some crap like that." He corrected. "But if ye want, you can call me Charon. The dead don't have names."

"I disagree." David said. "I'm dead, and my name's David." Charon looked back, almost suprised. "Still holding on to that whole memory thing, eh? Well I guess you've only been 'ere a few hours, but it'll clear up in the first hundred years I bet."
David swallowed deep. "That wasn't comforting." He said in a sharp tone. "Wasn't tryin to be." Charon retorted. David frowned. "Will you at least tell me the name you had when you were alive?" He asked.

"Sure," said the ferryman. "It twas Marcus, I think. Or it could have been Faddius..."
"Marcus will do." David said quickly. "Anyway, Marcus," David continued, "do you know what sins I've, er, sinned to land myself down 'ere?"

The ferryman scratched his jetting jaw, and said, "Well, I think it was sloth."
"Sloth?"
"Yep, and you were never baptized."
"What? I was baptized twice!"
Then I guess one cancled the other out then, didn't it love? It's like flipping a switch, you turned it on, and then turned it right back off again."
"That doesn't make any sense!" David shouted. Marcus looked back at him. "Then I suppose that's a matter to be brought up with the three judges of the underworld, isn't it?"
"Is it?" Dave couldn't help but to ask stupidly.
"It is." Marcus replied. "Well then, where are they?" David asked. "In the palace of Hades. Good luck getting past Cerberus, though."
"The dog?"
"the BIG dog, with three heads." Marcus corrected. "And trust me, that sonofabitch bites hard. You do not want to be bleeding from a dogbite for fifty years, believe you me." David decided to drop it at that. He had a feeling Marcus wasn't going to be a big help.

As far as David could guess, it took about two days for he and Marcus to cross the big river. He guessed the length was because Marcus kept floating farther down the river, to get them closer to his coffin, wherever it was.

Something he had to say for being dead; he never became hungry, or thirsty, or tired, thoug he did sleep a bit to pass the time. One morning, or evening, or midday, long after David lost track, Marcus yelled for him to wake up. "Oy, rise and shine you bloke! we're at the coast! Time to get off!"

David awoke, unrefreshed, and smiled at the coast. "Finally, I was going out of my mind with boredum."
"You should be thankful," said Marcus, "you'll be praying for peace like that for the rest of existance."
A shiver flew down his spine when he thought about the rest of existance. Dave hopped off the boat and stretched his legs. He walked a few paces before he realized the ferryman wasn't following him. "You coming?" Asked David. "One second." Said Marcus. "There's a new group of dead ones at the gates, I can't keep them waiting too long." He thought for a moment, and then snapped his bony fingers. "I got it!" Suddenly, his skin seemed to peal and flake, until his entire body was covered in dead skin. Then he slowly pushed away from the dead skin, until he was completely out of it. The dead skin now looked like a wax figureine, held in place by the ferry stick. "Off you go then!" Marcus shouted, and the dead skin animated. It grasped the pole tightly, and set sail into the misty water.

"I'm disgusted, and repulsed." said David. Marcus cackled. "I love bein' dead! C'mon, let's find your luggage." He stepped off the boat, and they began their journey through the Underworld.
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Alright, that's a rough draft, and I realize that there's not much detail. I haven't had this project all along, after all. Perhaps not the most action-packed topic there ever was, but I still feel it's worth a peek, to see what the Underworld's like. It's supposed to be a morbid comedy, though that wasn't exactly a funny part. Next, I plan to detail Marcus's and David's trip through the underworld, and find just where he fits in the Underworld. I know, it was pretty boring, but habg in there, I think the next one will be better.