Writing The Librarian [E]

[Shinmaru]

This was inspired by a couple of short stories that I read recently. Hopefully people enjoy it. Comments, critique, etc. are all welcome.

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Marion was a librarian. As far as librarians were concerned, Marion was very pretty. She had short, dirty blonde hair and green eyes. She almost always wore a lavender sweater that resembled a cloak, and a long, plain dress with a flowery pattern. She also had reading glasses, but she rarely used those because she almost never had the opportunity to use them. She always seemed to be busy with other things.

Marion would walk into the library each morning bright and early. She checked in as promptly and punctually as possible, but it could not be helped it if she was late more often than not. The library was on a road that was far out of the way from Marion?s home. The school where she took her children was in the complete opposite direction from the library, and also happened to be out of the way from Marion?s home, as well. Since customers were very scarce when Marion arrived at the library, she did not think that it was much of a problem if she arrived a few minutes late.

?Are you late [i]again[/i], Marion?? Ms. Hodge, the head librarian, said, stepping in front of Marion as soon as she walked through the front door. ?Honestly, that?s the third time this week!?

?I-I?m sorry,? Marion stammered after jumping back in surprise at Ms. Hodge?s sudden appearance. ?I tried as best I could to get here on time, but--?

?I?ve heard your excuses before, Marion,? Ms. Hodge deadpanned. She stood glaring at Marion with her arms crossed over her chest. Ms. Hodge was very short; standing at full height, she only reached up to Marion?s shoulders. Her heavily wrinkled face was set in a look of fury, which was at once both comical and frightening. She moved her right arm upwards and tapped absently at the thick spectacles set on the bridge of her nose. Her right foot tapped along in rhythm.

?I?m really sorry,? Marion muttered. She looked past Ms. Hodge and into the main room of the library. There were already a few people in there. Behind the checkout counter, a couple of workers were setting up the outdated computers that the librarians used. One of Marion?s co-workers was busy putting away a few books. Ms. Hodge?s large desk, which was situated in the middle of the library, was of course empty. Marion could not bring herself to look at Mrs. Hodge. Instead, she concentrated on the small novel in her hands, [u]The Awakening[/u], gripping it tightly.

?Just get to work,? Ms. Hodge sighed. She turned around and left the room, shaking her head as she walked away. Marion calmed herself and waited until she was rid of the slight embarrassment that she always felt when she spoke with Ms. Hodge. After a few moments, Marion decided to get to work. The thick heels of her shoes clacked loudly on the floor as she exited the room. She then walked behind the checkout counter. Her computer was already on, and one of her co-workers, a boy named Jake who was barely out of high school, was standing next to it.

?I turned on your computer, ma?am,? Jake said, brushing a hand through his messy hair.

?Thank you, Jake,? Marion replied, putting her book down on a chair. ?And please don?t call me ?ma?am?.?

?Sorry,? Jake said. He walked to the employee?s room, while Marion prepared to serve the two people who were standing in line. A man stepped forward and placed a book on the desk. He glanced around the room impatiently while Marion was scanning the barcode on the back of the book. When she was done with that, she took out a small stamp from below her desk, and stamped a date on a sticker near the barcode.

?Here you go, sir,? Marion said kindly. ?Your book will be due in three weeks.?

?Yeah, thanks,? the man said. He grabbed the book from Marion?s hands and left the room. A woman stepped forward from the line. She was carrying five video tapes in her hands. She placed them in a messy stack onto the table.

?I?d like to check out these videos,? the woman said. Marion smiled politely and began opening up the tape boxes. She scanned them just the same as she did the books, but she also checked to see if all of the tapes were rewound. All of them were. Marion also had to rub the tapes once or twice against some sort of metal box so that the alarm would not go off when customers left the library. She didn?t know how this worked at all, nor did she suspect that anyone in the library knew how this worked, either.

When Marion was finished checking out the videos, the woman scooped them up happily and turned to leave the library. Marion looked out at the room. There were only a few other people in the library at the moment. Most of the patrons were searching through the bookcases. Ms. Hodge was tapping away at her computer. Marion sat down on a chair and she took out her reading glasses from a pocket. She put the glasses on and began reading her book contently. A few words in, a sharp, piercing cry rang through the hall. Marion took off her glasses and scanned the room.

The customer from earlier had set off the alarms. She walked back up to Marion with a blank look on her face. She then handed the videos back to Marion. Sighing a bit, Marion re-checked out the videos, and scanned them against the metal box. The woman nodded her head, took the videos, and walked out of the room. Marion went back over to the chair to sit down, when the alarm sounded off once again.

?Please just go,? Marion said. ?The videos are checked out to you, I have the record right here. There?s just something wrong with the alarm at the moment. It?s nothing major, I?m sure of that.?

?No, no,? the woman replied, coming back through the white columns that held the alarm scanners. ?I want to make absolutely sure that I?m not just taking these videos from you. I don?t want that alarm ringing when I leave the library.?

?Really,? Marion pleaded. ?It?s no trouble at all, I assure you that I have the record right here.? But the woman would not listen, so Marion had to repeat the procedure again. She would have to do it again three more times afterwards before the alarm system would cooperate. Jake had managed to serve six customers in the time that it had taken Marion to satisfy the one. After the small ordeal, Marion decided to take a break. She picked up her book, went into the employee?s room, and she sat down on a chair.

?Hey!? Jake shouted, after a few moments. ?I need your help out here!? Marion groaned and put away her reading glasses once again. She stood up and walked into the other room.

?What is it?? Marion asked.

?This guy wants to sign up for a library card,? Jake replied. ?But I can?t find the library card forms.?

?Did you look in the desk drawers?? Marion questioned.

?Of course I looked in the desk drawers,? Jake answered. ?They weren?t there.?

?Well, that?s where they usually are,? Marion said. She walked over to a desk drawer on the far side of the room, and she opened it up. Inside were many library card forms. Marion took one of the forms and handed it to Jake, who had a sheepish grin on his face.

?Thanks,? Jake said, handing it to the person who was waiting at the desk.

?You?re welcome,? Marion replied. She turned to leave the room, but Jake put a hand on her shoulder. ?What is it??

?Would you mind staying for a moment?? Jake asked. ?I?ve never given a library card to anyone before - I don?t really know what to do.?

?It?s simple,? Marion said, astonished. ?You just wait for him to fill out the form, enter some information into the computer, scan the card, and then you give the card to him. It?s really very simple, Jake.?

?Just help me out, please?? Jake asked. Marion gave in and walked Jake through the tedious process of signing a person up for a library card. She helped the customer with all of his questions about what information he could put on the form, and what information he would be allowed to leave off. She helped Jake struggle with the antique computer to put in the necessary information. And she helped Jake out when the computer refused to scan the library card barcode into the system.

?Thanks a lot,? Jake said. ?I couldn?t have done it without you.?

?Don?t mention it,? Marion said. ?I?m going to the backroom.? Marion sat down in the same chair that she had sat in earlier, and she took out her reading glasses. She started reading her novel, but she was interrupted after a few seconds.

?Hey, Marion,? Sally said, walking into the room and plopping down onto the dusty couch in the corner of the room. Whenever Marion was at the library, even when she was not working, Sally was always doing some sort of work there. Marion suspected that the library was Sally?s entire existence; she never seemed to leave, or if she did, she very rarely left.

?Hello, Sally,? Marion replied, letting a small note of irritation slip into her voice. Sally did not seem to notice.

?How?s everything going with you?? Sally asked.

?As well as it could be,? Marion replied. ?My kids are all going to school now. They?re all going to the same school at the moment, thankfully.? Marion allowed herself a slight smile.

?That?s good,? Sally said. She poured herself a drink, and took a loud sip from her cup. ?I can?t imagine how excited you must be to have all of your children in school! I remember the first day that my little boy attended school. He was so very nervous, and he wouldn?t let go of my leg when we got to the school. But I gave him a nice pep-talk right then and there. Do you know what I said??

?No,? Marion replied, glancing at her book. ?What did you say??

?I told him ?Little Charlie,?? Sally began. ?Charlie is his name, by the way. ?Little Charlie, there?s no reason for you to be worrying. School isn?t an experience to be afraid of; it?s an experience to be excited about! You?ll be perfectly fine in there, Charlie, and at the end of the day you?ll be glad that I took you to school.? And then my little boy let go of my leg and went to school with a big smile on his face! Isn?t that just precious??

?Yes,? Marion replied. ?That?s very fascinating.?

?So, how has your husband been doing?? Sally asked.

?He became ill recently,? Marion said.

?Oh!? Sally gasped. ?I hope that it?s nothing serious!?

?No, it?s not,? Marion said. ?It?s just the flu. He?s been restrained to his bed for a few days, though, and I don?t think that he?ll be getting better any time soon. It seems that he?s caught a rather nasty form of the flu.?

?That?s too bad,? Sally said. ?Still, all you can do is make sure that he doesn?t suffer any more than he has to.?

?I guess so,? Marion sighed. Sally took another loud sip from her cup.

?Say, Marion??? Sally began.

?Yes?? Marion asked, standing up from her chair.

?Would you mind going out with me perhaps later on tonight?? Sally asked. ?Maybe for a little girls? night out type of thing.?

?I can?t,? Marion replied. ?I have my husband to take care of, remember? Plus, I have the kids to worry about.?

?Oh, that?s right!? Sally said. ?What a silly goose I am!? Sally let out a loud, bellowing laugh that set Marion?s hair on end. ?Then how about in a few weeks, then, if you?re not too busy??

?We?ll see,? Marion said, her heart beating a bit faster than normal. ?Maybe if I?m not too busy.? Marion forced herself not to go any further. If Sally had known her real feelings on the matter, she most certainly would have been very offended.

?I think that I?ll be getting back to work, then,? Sally said, standing up. ?It was nice talking to you, Marion.?

?It was nice talking to you, too, Sally,? Marion said. She added an ?I guess? under her breath when Sally left the room. She looked up at the clock, and saw that she had about ten minutes left in her break. She sat down once again, and reached over for her book. As soon as her fingers grabbed the spine of the novel, Ms. Hodge strode into the room.

?Marion, I need you to go put away some books,? Ms. Hodge said.

?What?? Marion said. ?But I still have a few minutes of break time left.?

?And what were you planning to do with [i]that[/i]?? Ms. Hodge asked. ?[i]Read[/i]? I daresay that you can read on your own time, Marion. Now go put away those books!?

?Yes, Ms. Hodge,? Marion murmured, her voice escaping softly from her lips. She stepped out from the backroom and into the main area of the library. There were carts full of books by nearly every bookshelf, their contents ready to be put away. Jake was busy at the front desk, tending to a long line of people who were ready to check out books and videos. Sally was busy talking to a small group of children in the children?s section of the library. A few other people were chatting away in a secluded corner of the library.

Marion walked over to the first bookshelf, rolled the cart of books into the middle of the cramped hall, and began putting away the books. After a few moments, Marion realized that not all of the books were going to fit on this shelf. Then she saw that some of the books that were already on this shelf were in the wrong section. Shaking her head lightly, Marion took some of the books off of the rack and placed them onto the cart beside her. She then replaced these books with the rest of the books on the cart. After about a half hour, she finished with the first section.

It was the same with the rest of the sections. Marion was surprised with how sloppily the books were put away, since she had not recently been assigned to put away the books. Many of the novels were in completely wrong sections that were not even close to where they should have been taken to. The worst part was that the books that actually belonged in each section had to be put away all over the place. Marion was constantly bending over and also stretching far above where she normally would have to reach. She also had to evade books that fell from the uppermost shelves. Many of these books had been put away very loosely, and were liable to fall off of the shelf at even the slightest shock.

It took Marion a few hours to put away all of the books. Her limbs were very sore afterwards, and a sharp pain shot through her back. She pushed the carts back one at a time to the backroom with a slight grimace on her face. When she was finished she walked up to Ms. Hodge?s desk and asked to leave early.

?Now why should I let you leave early?? Ms. Hodge asked.

?I?m not feeling very well at the moment,? Marion answered. ?And it?s almost time for me to pick up my children from school. I?m sure that my husband needs something right now, too.?

?Okay,? Ms. Hodge said, trying in vain to hide the small smirk developing on her face. ?You may leave early today, Marion.?

?Thank you,? Marion replied. She left the room as quickly as she could, despite the soreness spreading through her legs. Her heels clicked and clacked on the floor as she walked once again through the entrance hall. With a strain of effort, Marion pushed open the front door of the library and walked outside. The sun shone brightly in her face, and she raised her hand up to her eyes, covering them for a few moments.

She walked to her car, opened the door, and got inside. The car was very hot, but Marion tried to ignore it. She placed her hands on the steering wheel and then retracted them quickly. The wheel was very hot. With a grunt of annoyance, Marion placed one hand on the steering wheel, and put her key in the ignition with the other. The car started up, and Marion pulled it out of the parking lot and into the main road.

The road to Marion?s home was long, twisted, and full of sharp curves. The sun was starting to dip eastward, and the solar rays flew right into Marion?s sightline. She squinted the entire drive home. This made a few of the trickier turns more difficult than they usually were, but Marion managed. When she made it to the house and got out of her car, she noticed that a dull ache had developed in her head and she was slightly dizzy. She walked carefully to the house, and walked inside.

The interior of her home was no cooler than it was outside. Marion tossed her book on a coffee table near a couch in the living room. She shut the door behind her, and when she did, a loud coughing sounded off through the halls.

?Is that you, honey?? Marion?s husband?s raspy voice asked.

?Yes, it?s me,? Marion answered. ?Have you taken your medicine yet??

?You know that I can?t get out of bed right now,? her husband said. ?I think that it?s barely time for me to take it right now, anyway.? Marion stayed silent and walked into the kitchen. Sitting on a counter next to a stainless steel spoon was a bottle of flu medicine. She picked up the bottle and spoon and took them to her husband?s room. Marion?s husband lay pathetically on his bed, his sheets drawn just under his nose, with his hands and feet peeking out from the extremities of the blankets. His eyes and nose were as red as Marion had ever seen.

?Open wide,? Marion said, pouring some medicine onto the spoon. With a grunt of effort, Marion?s husband opened his mouth long enough for Marion to stick the spoon inside of his gaping jaw. Her husband swallowed the medicine with a look of disgust on his face.

?I don?t think that I?ll ever get used to that,? he said.

?Don?t complain,? Marion said. ?The taste of medicine should be the least of anyone?s worries.? She poured him another spoonful, and fed it to him. This time he was a bit more accepting of the medicine, and he swallowed it without complaint. Marion put down the medicine and the spoon on her husband?s bedside counter, and turned to leave the room.

?Where are you going?? her husband asked.

?I?m going to pick up the kids,? Marion replied. ?I should be back before long.? She leaned over and planted a soft kiss onto her husband?s forehead. He smiled appreciatively and buried himself into his covers. Marion left the room quickly and strode all the way to the front door.

She stopped in front of it and glanced over at the coffee table. Her book was still laying there. She felt at her reading glasses absently, lost in thought. Her breathing had stilled almost completely. Marion could sense everything around herself, and yet she could sense nothing at all. She shook her head rapidly and came back into reality. She opened the door and was met with a fresh blast of hot air.

?Goodbye, honey!? her husband managed to shout hoarsely. Marion looked blankly at the hall leading up to her husband?s room. She then glanced forlornly one last time at the book on the coffee table.

?Goodbye,? she whispered, walking through the door and closing it behind her.

[lea]

Is that all, or are you going to do more with it?
I want to know, before I comment. *nods*

[Shinmaru]

[QUOTE=lea]Is that all, or are you going to do more with it?
I want to know, before I comment. *nods*[/QUOTE]

Well, I don't know if I'm going to do more with this story [i]specifically[/i], but I have very vague ideas in my head for a much larger story in which this would be a small part. I was thinking that it would be a collection of short stories about a town, and each short story would focus on a member of the community. People like Marion, Ms. Hodge, Sally, etc. are all just little parts of this town. Also, each short story would play off of the others to focus on a sort of theme, which I haven't really given much thought to yet lol. Everything is just ideas at this point in time.

I like Marion and the others a lot, however, so I'll probably end up using them again at some point. :)

[Mitch]

It was good, but you've written better I think. The main point of it seemed to be that in this day and age, there's little time to do what someone really wants to do, because there's all this other garbage you've got to do - work, school, take care of kids, etc. I found no grammatical errors, and I usually seem to have a pretty sharp eye at those (or so I think, anyway). The story honestly didn't interest me much as a reader, but I read it anyway, for your sake, since you rock. The ending was the highlight for me. I really have nothing else to say.

[Gavin]

[SIZE=1]A very interesting little story Mike, I quite like the way you went to such great detail to describe everything that might occur in a normal person's day. I'd agree with Mitch's description that because people often have so much everyday things to do in their life, they often don't have the chance to do the things they'd really like to. I really look forward to reading about the different short-stories about other people in the town, and perhaps their interaction with characters we've already met.[/SIZE]

[Mimmsicle]

[quote]Marion was a librarian. As far as librarians were concerned, Marion was very pretty. [U]She[/U] had short, dirty blonde hair and green eyes. [U]She[/U] almost always wore a lavender sweater that resembled a cloak, and a long, plain dress with a flowery pattern. [U]She[/U] also had reading glasses, but she rarely used those because she almost never had the opportunity to use them. [U]She[/U] always seemed to be busy with other things.[/quote]Why must you torture me so?! :animecry: Ehum, on a more serious note I appreciate how annoying that paragraph would be to re-structure without going about it the way you have, so let us slide this time *slides*[quote]She checked in as promptly and punctually as she could, but [U]she[/U] could not help it if she was late more often than not. [/quote]How about striking ^that^ she? _^_[quote]?I?ve heard your excuses before, Marion,? Ms. Hodge deadpanned. She stood glaring at Marion with her [U]arms crossed over her chest.[/U] Ms. Hodge was very short; standing at full height, she only reached up to Marion?s shoulders. Her heavily wrinkled face was set in a look of fury, which was at once both comical and frightening. [U]She tapped absently at the thick spectacles set on the bridge of her nose.[/U] Her right foot tapped along in rhythm.[/quote]Uhm, are her arms folded so high up that they can tap the glasses? It just confuses me the way it's written *blush*[quote]If Sally had known her real feelings on the matter, she most certainly would have been very offended.[/quote]Why would she have been offended? Enquiring minds want to know! :<[quote]Marion was surprised with how sloppily the books were put away, since she had not recently *been* assigned to put away the books.[/quote]Just added the "been" since it felt like it was missing ^_^;[quote]Marion was constantly bending over and also stretching far above where she normally would have to reach. She would also have to evade books that fell from the uppermost shelves.[/quote]How about re-arranging the second sentence to "She also had to evade books that fell from the uppermost shelves" to avoid repeating the first sentence?[quote]?Don?t complain,? Marion said. ?The taste of medicine should be the least of [U]anyone?s[/U] worries.? She poured him another spoonful, and [strike]she[/strike] fed it to him.[/quote]It reads a bit weird having "[I]anyone's[/I] worries" and I didn't get the impression anyone else was sick, so it just refers to the husband, right? So wouldn't "your" work better? Enlighten me _^_


[B]BUT[/B], despite my nit-picking, I really like this story ^_^ The slow pace fits perfectly with what you're depicting (because I doubt many people think librarians are leading an extraordinary life) and as a reader you appreciate the frustration of constantly being cut off from the innocent enjoyment of having a moment to yourself to read a book.

Though, it seems that while she's used to having time sucked away from her reading, this day it's unusually ... uh, sucky >> Is it meant to sort of indicate that she's being pushed over the edge?

And I really hope there's more to this little universe you've begun to create!

[Shinmaru]

Ha, wow, you're way better at this than I am lol. I never spot this kind of stuff; I still think that I'm pretty bad at editing my own work.

Anyway, most of what you pointed out were definitely slights on my part. I'll get to fixing those up when I have the time. As for a couple of them...well, I kind of wanted to be a bit more subtle with why Marion's real feelings on the matter would offend Sally. I think that it's made pretty obvious that Marion doesn't care at all for what Sally is saying, and if Sally were to know that, then she'd be pretty offended. I don't think that it needs to be explicity stated afterwards. I like to let the reader use his or her imagination, sometimes lol.

As for the last thing that you pointed out, well, that's just Marion letting out a bit of frustration about her own problems. She's going through this bore of a life, and while the taste of medicine can be pretty bad, it's not really something that would make for a really significant complaint lol. I would probably be pretty annoyed if I went through this really menial, boring day-to-day routine and was met with nothing but complaints when I got home.

Anyway, thanks for taking the time to edit the story. I'm pretty bad with pronouns, and I'm always at a loss as to how to refer to characters without getting really repetitive. I think that's really tough, honestly lol.

[lea]

What Mia pointed out was what I was trying to point out in the musician story you had written before.

The way she expressed it was much better than how I had, though. *nods*

[Mimmsicle]

Ah, thanks for clearing that up for me. The medicine part really makes sense now *sagely nod*

Hehe, I was kind of hoping for some weird twist in the Sally case. Moving on >>[quote name='Shinmaru'] I'm pretty bad with pronouns, and I'm always at a loss as to how to refer to characters without getting really repetitive. I think that's really tough, honestly lol.[/quote]Dude, tell me about it. I really struggle too and that paragraph is pretty much how it looks before I tackle my notes. You're not alone *hugs*

And just to hammer in the praise, every great writer has to go through the editorial process *cheesy wink and air kiss*

[Lady Asphyxia]

[quote name='Shinmaru'] I'm pretty bad with pronouns, and I'm always at a loss as to how to refer to characters without getting really repetitive. I think that's really tough, honestly lol.[/quote] [font=Arial Narrow][size=2]
Oh, god. Tell me about it. Sometimes I try to substitute "she" for something like "the blonde" or something. I don't do it very often, but it generally isn't to bad. Imagine my surprise when, after sending a story to a new beta [like an editor] to crit, she says that using phrases like "the blonde" make it too long! ...I never sent anything else to her, lol. >.>

I liked the story. I don't know what Mitch was talking about, don't listen to him, lol. I thought the description was great and the total downtroddenness was just fantastic. I did work experience at a library and I know exactly what Miss M. feels like. I was shelving for hours. I actually gave myself a concussion at one point.

I think the only thing I have difficulty with is that I want something to happen. I'm a person in one of those camps, you know?: [i]A story is interesting when an ordinary person does something out of the ordinary[/i]. I want M. to...to put up with helping her husband and for her to get sick while he isn't and not have any help and then eventually just snap and do...something. And the ending just [b]lends[/b] itself to that sort of thing.

So, yes. I'd love for you to go further with this, but as it stands, it's good. ^_^
[/size][/font]

[Shinmaru]

[quote name='Lady Asphyxia][font=Arial Narrow][size=2]I think the only thing I have difficulty with is that I want something to happen. I'm a person in one of those camps, you know?: [i]A story is interesting when an ordinary person does something out of the ordinary[/i]. I want M. to...to put up with helping her husband and for her to get sick while he isn't and not have any help and then eventually just snap and do...something. And the ending just [b]lends[/b] itself to that sort of thing.[/size'][/font][/quote]

Yeah, I agree with you. I think that the ending is a bit unsatisfying, and at the very least, demands that there be another part to this. Once I start fleshing out my ideas a bit more, I can definitely see myself revisiting this story and resolving it a bit more. I already have tons of ideas for characters in this town, interactions, different plot points, etc. The problem right now is getting it all to fit together right now lol. But I [i]really[/i] want to stick with it, and I think that most of what I write for a while will be in some way connected to this story. :)

[eleanor]

[i]I think the only thing I have difficulty with is that I want something to happen. I'm a person in one of those camps, you know?: A story is interesting when an ordinary person does something out of the ordinary. I want M. to...to put up with helping her husband and for her to get sick while he isn't and not have any help and then eventually just snap and do...something. And the ending just lends itself to that sort of thing.[/i]

[color=darkslateblue] I slightly disagree. When I first read your story, Shin, it felt as if you were merely writing about Marion and things pertaining only to Marion. Would it be better if I called it character-driven? Ah, well. It would be very nice if you fleshed the story out a bit more, but I don't feel you really need a scene in which Marion snaps, or something dramatic happens to her. Your whole story gives the reader a decent amount of sense. Sense in that Marion is...depressed or at least very tired of her life. *shrug* I may be wrong. If you fleshed it out more and really get an accurate mood of how Marion is feeling, a dramatic scene is not necessary.

Awesome job, though. :D I like your writing.[/color]