Change your past.

[TheShinje]

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If you could change your past, what would you do differently?

I think about this quite often, beginning this year, on how nifty it would be to go back and do things differently.

For me, I would change my school work ethic. I would recognise that the path I was travelling down was going to lead to dead end supermarket BS, and worked better at my grades.

Socially, I would relish the opportunity to make new friends, and not screw up some old frienships as well. There's also the idea of toying with old enemies using the mentality I have today (eg, and IQ advantagde) being quite nifty in itself.

I'd definately go back and change things in a heartbeat. But I don't mean butterfly-effect movie type when you flash forward again after setting right a wrong, I mean living the last few years over again, as if they had just been a big premonition dream.

That's my take on it, anyway.[/color][/size]

[Kamuro]

I'm not quite sure if I'd actually go back and change things, as many mistakes as I've made, you'd think I'd be intent on changing them, but they made me the person I am today, and changing the past means changing the future, theres a lot of things I wish I could've done differently at the time, but as time passes I understand better the action I made and why I made it, and I'm able to live life with no regrets

[Panda]

I too have thought about this quite a bit. I have made many mistakes in the past that I regret, but all those things I have learned from. Those mistakes make me who I am so I don't think if I had the chance to change the past I would do it.

The only thing I would do is some little stuff like really enjoy being healthy and able to do things like hike and rock climb all day. Since I now have Rheumatoid Arthritis I wish I could do those things again. Since I can't, I would like to go back in time to really appreciate the times I did have.

But since I can't change the past, I can make sure I don't have as many regrets in the future. I enjoy my good days and learn from the bad ones.

It's amazing how many little things you can take for granted.

[Coltonw911]

Would I change mine? some yes and some no. certain events good or bad worked out for the better reasons in my life.... i would change the fact that I cannot have a relationship for a long period of time though lol. i needed to be more patient and thats why im tryin to fix that already,

[Lunai]

[font=trebuchet ms][color=darkgoldenrod]I wouldn't change much...just little things that still bother me, like making sure that I save enough money before my sudden move across the state, keeping my jewelry with me (my ex boyfriend refuses to return my jewelry now that we are no longer together), things of that nature.

The really big things - the scary situations I was in with my godmother, not being able to finish school the way I want to, etc. I would be tempted to change them, but I run the risk of becoming a totally different person. And I've recently gotten to the point that I like who I am.[/font][/color]

[Ezekiel]

[SIZE=1]There are a few things I'd like to change, I guess, nothing major though.

When I was young (and stupid) I done a lot of, well....stupid things. Things that I look back on and while I wasn't embarrassed about them then because I didn't know any better, I cringe now thinking about them.

There was one time when my cousins had come over to South Africa to visit us; I was about nine at the time. When they were leaving and I was helping with their bags I smiled and held out my hand asking if they had any money left over from their trip. At the time I had no idea what I was doing was rude, but I look back now and wish I'd never opened my mouth.

But I suppose what I've done in my past has shaped the person I am today, and I quite like me, changing one simple thing could make me a completely different person.[/SIZE]

[Gavin]

[quote name='Panda']I too have thought about this quite a bit. I have made many mistakes in the past that I regret, but all those things I have learned from. Those mistakes make me who I am so I don't think if I had the chance to change the past I would do it.[/quote]

[SIZE=1]Panda has basically summed up all my thoughts on the subject, changing your past would change the person you are today, so you'd really have to decide if you're happy with who you are now.

If I had the chance to change my past I'd probably try and lead a more healthy lifestyle, and definitely avoid the ball that put me out of school. But if I did change those things the I'd probably change a thousand different things that have happened since. I mean since I've been out of school I've had the chance to really think about what I want to do with my life and had some great times on OB, and that leads me to wonder if what's happened since has been worth it.

However dealing in what if's and if only's is probably the best way to torture yourself, your life is as it is now, life it and just enjoy it. Life is too precious to waste on wishing you could have done things differently. [/SIZE]

[Retribution]

[SIZE=1]I think that when people say there's not a single thing they'd want to change, they're either not thinking hard enough, or lying. But that's just an opinion. Yes, they make you who you are today, but your life might be better than it is now if you could change the past.

If I could go back and change my past, I'd go back to my elementary years and try to be more fearless. I guess I wasn't a risk taker and didn't always stand up for myself which may have changed who I am today. I would also not cheat on the two tests that I did so on. It probably would've instilled a stronger sense of integrity in me.[/SIZE]

[Kamuro]

true, it could benefit you in a positive way, but wouldn't you feel a bit empty, and miss the way things were before? even if life wasn't perfect, I think thats the way its supposed to do, if we could all go back and fix things then theres really no point in having them occur in the first place, if you think about it, would you really want things to be perfect, would you rather change things to your liking just because it didn't go the way you planned? I'd say no

[Lunai]

[QUOTE=Retribution][SIZE=1]I think that when people say there's not a single thing they'd want to change, they're either not thinking hard enough, or lying. But that's just an opinion. Yes, they make you who you are today, but your life might be better than it is now if you could change the past.
[/SIZE][/QUOTE]

[font=trebuchet ms][color=darkorchid]I think that when people say they wouldn't change anything, it isn't because they are being lazy or slow thinkers - more likely it is that the risk of their lives being not better but worse, or just much too different, than it already is doesn't weigh out against the possible pros for altering your own past.[/font][/color]

[Adahn]

[size=2]The only reason for someone to 'change their past' that I can see is that they are not pleased with where they are now. I, for one, lead a blessed life, and I honestly wouldn't change anything. If you could change your past, it would change who you are today. People who want to change their past aren't satisfied with who they are today. Perhaps instead of brooding over what has already happened, you should work on improving your situation where you can affect it; the present. If you regret the character traits you developed in the past, change them now. The only thing that is and forever will be out of our influence is the past.[/size]

[Kamuro]

that does apply to many, but I guess I'm just special lol, I don't lead a blessed life, its anything but actually, however, I don't think I would go back and change things, maybe its cause I'd have to admit the several mistakes I've made, and they were so bad I actually had to fix them, but I just don't think I would, pleased or not, I love the people I know, and even though they do, I'd never want them to change, and hopefully they wish the same for me

[Retribution]

[SIZE=1]There's truth to what you're saying, Adahn. But I do believe that your life could benefit from correcting the past mistake, even if you're happy with where you are now.

I guess most people will say that "what trials they faced make them what they are today." But wouldn't you still learn the lesson if you could see it coming and redirect the future? Premarital sex, for example. If you have a kid on the way, you may want to go back into the past and change the event. Would you still learn the lesson, not to have sex, since you made a correct, thought out, informed decision. Granted, you wouldn't learn it in the same way, but the lesson would still be there, would it not?

Yeah, I see a few holes in my arguement. Fire away.

EDIT: I realized that people would like to change minor events, but nothing major. This I completely agree with. Major events are... major. But still, sometimes you might want to change that major event for the better to improve your current circumstances. [/SIZE]

[Adahn]

It's not about where you are now, it's about who you are now, and whether you're comfortable with it. Changing your past (significantly) boils down to a desire to change your character. Wanting to change your character by musing about past events demonstrates either a lack of realization that you can change your character now, or an understanding of this concept, but with a lack of will to do so.
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So, with the original topic being modified from 'change your past' to 'change your character', the response of 'I would change [blank] because it would make [blank] better' translates to, 'I have a problem with [personal characteristic] that I would change if there were an easy way to do it'. People, if you really want to change something about your character, change it now. If you don't have the willpower, then continue to look back on the past and muse over situations you see as dead and buried, but are actually buried alive.
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[SunfallE]

Well I don't have a problem with who I am now. So I have no desire to change my past. Although I had a crazy childhood and my teen years weren't so great either I wouldn't change the past just to avoid the problems I faced. If you are wondering what I mean, then read the thread I posted 'Is suicide really selfish?'

I mean even if I had different parents there is no guarentee that I wouldn't have found myself in the same type of abusive situation once again. So since things worked out and I'm happy with how I am now, I wouldn't change my past.

Espically since I have the desire to change myself and have continued to do so. :animesmil If I changed the past I might lose what I have gained and it's just not worth it to me.

[Missa]

[QUOTE]Originally Posted by [B]Retribution[/B]

I think that when people say there's not a single thing they'd want to change, they're either not thinking hard enough, or lying. But that's just an opinion. Yes, they make you who you are today, but your life might be better than it is now if you could change the past.[/QUOTE]

Once upon a time, I suffered from clinical depression. I cried myself to sleep, I wished that I would die...etc. Eventually I realized that if I was depressed, it was my own fault. Sure, my family was/is disfunctional. Sure, I suffered from extreme isolation. So what? I had forgotten that I had a family that loved me, despite all their faults. I was isolated, but isolation had taught me a lot things about myself and given me time to think outside the box.

It all boiled down to the fact that, I might not be able to control other people, but I could control myself. I could control how I felt, and I could choose the life that I wanted to live. I gradually stopped wallowing in self-pity and self-loathing. I started to thank the higher power for everything that I had, and I started to love myself. And now, life is good.

I wouldn't change the past. I may have suffered, but suffering was necessary. I learned a valuable lesson, one that a lot of people around me haven't quite figured out yet. Could I have learned this lesson another way, a easier way? Probably not. Think about all the times that someone has given you good advice and you've ignored it. You didn't ignore it because you're stupid, you ignored it because you WANTED to make your own mistakes. Maybe because we seem to learn best from our own experience. Experience is valuable, though sometimes not appreciated.

Even if you could remember your mistakes and still change them, would that lesson still be as valuable? No one can really say, the idea is very abstract...But I would assume that if you could remember, but did not suffer, your experience would become just something that you told yourself. So, would you make the same mistake again? I think, perhaps...If I had never been depressed before, would I be as happy as I am now?

[QUOTE]Originally Posted by [B]Lunai[/B]

I think that when people say they wouldn't change anything, it isn't because they are being lazy or slow thinkers - more likely it is that the risk of their lives being not better but worse, or just much too different, than it already is doesn't weigh out against the possible pros for altering your own past.[/QUOTE]

Lazy? Slow? I don't think so. My life might be better if I did, or worse, or very different, I agree. It's not that I don't want to change it because it might require too much effort, thought, or risk. I don't want to change it because I value all of the experiences that I've had, good and bad. And I have learned how to be happy, I've learned how to love myself. I don't think I could be if I had never truly allowed myself to play the victim. I'd probably just become more self-absorbed and delusional.

[Kamuro]

[QUOTE]I wouldn't change the past. I may have suffered, but suffering was necessary. I learned a valuable lesson, one that a lot of people around me haven't quite figured out yet[/QUOTE]

someone who finally supports me, yay lol, things that we've done and experiences we've lived through are important, and are not meant to be changed

[Sara]

[quote name='Retribution][size=1']I think that when people say there's not a single thing they'd want to change, they're either not thinking hard enough, or lying. But that's just an opinion. Yes, they make you who you are today, but your life might be better than it is now if you could change the past.[/size][/quote][font=trebuchet ms]I think you're wrong. There are things you can think about, and perhaps regret or wish that they had gone differently...but when you speak of really [b]wanting to change[/b] something, I get the impression that, given the chance, you actually [i]would[/i] go back and change it.

There are a lot of things that, if I had known more about myself, my limits, my goals, I would have done differently. But I learned these things about myself through what I [i]did[/i] do. Sure, sometimes it seems that it would be nice to bypass the learning and just have the knowledge, heh, but that isn't what I want.

If I were given the option to go back in time, or alter my past, would I do it? There are several points in time I wouldn't mind erasing--a couple embarrassing moments at family events, a few instances where it would really have been in my best interests to speak up instead of remain quiet and passive. But would I do it?

I don't think I would. You can tell me that my life could be 'better,' and perhaps you're right. But, by and large, I'm very happy with my life as it is. Even some of the things I wish the most (they generally involve someone who wanted to out out with me, and my being to surprised/awkward/embarrassed to deal with things the way I should have) had gone differently have affected my friends and I in small ways. I think I wouldn't want to erase that.

It's what growing up is, really. You cope with all the embarrassing, frustrating, and sad moments of your life, until you can look back on them without wanting to change them.

All that being said in defense of others, there are two things from my pre-high school years (I don't think high school is far enough into my past for me to look at it with anything approaching objectivity) that I still wish I could change.

In eighth grade, I made a cassette tape of myself talking about the memories I had of grade school, and I gave it to one of the girls in my class. If I could do things differently, I would keep the cassette. First, because I didn't make a copy of it, and I would like to be able to listen to what I said then. Second, because as the years went on I grew to loathe that girl, and I still cringe at the thought that she has a tape of me being so emotional. Yes, I'm embarrassed. :p

The other thing I would change goes back much further. When I was eight years old, my good friend Joe was diagnosed with leukemia. I started next year at a new school and never saw him after the last day of second grade. If I could change things, I would have kept in touch with him.

So those are my two things. Of course, if I were actually reliving things, I'm sure I would do many things differently. I would join drama my freshman year in high school instead of my sophomore year. I would be more assertive when starting to hang out with my friends. I would take high school much less seriously. These aren't things I wish I could change, but things I probably would change, if I were to do things over. Does that make sense?

But from the present, looking back, those are two things I wish I could change.[/font]

[Havokio]

[COLOR=Indigo]There's a crap load I would wish to change.

But...

I wouldn't be where I am. I would love to relive past moments, and make little changes, but the end result would be to drastic. I like my present state. Sure, I'd like to be a one man show, womanizer, musician, etc. But here's the thing...

I can go for those things NOW.

I try not to look towards the past and create a better future for myself. There isn't a point in contemplating on what I would've done, simply cause I can't change a thing from my past. I'd rather fix up the mistakes that I CAN DO.

Memories are another matter entirely. Those cannot change. Past experiences can come back to haunt us. We, as human beings, evolve. We face these past demons with newly accquired skills, logic and conviction. We can tie up loose ends, but somethings aren't meant to change.[/COLOR]

[TheShinje]

[QUOTE=Havokio][color=Indigo]

Memories are another matter entirely. Those cannot change. Past experiences can come back to haunt us. We, as human beings, evolve. We face these past demons with newly accquired skills, logic and conviction. We can tie up loose ends, but somethings aren't meant to change.[/color][/QUOTE]
[size=1]Hmm, interesting.

If I had the power to change ym past at will, I would [b]want[/b] those memories to stay. Like i've learned from the past and at the same time, bettered my present. I would still want the memories of a screwed up timeline, i guess.

I know that it would never happen, and I would probably die of fright if I did one day wake up and I was 12 again. Still, it's quite a fanciful though to go back mentally and mull over what you'd do, with the knowledge you have of today.

Adahn is right though, if you don't like your cirumstances now, change them [b]today.[/b][/size]

[Retribution]

[SIZE=1]When I said I would want to change what I did on a test, I think I meant it differently that what you all are thinking about. I mean to say that while not imperitive or life-altering, it would be a nice thing to have redone in retrospect. I have no insecurity with myself, but rather wish the memory not to be there. I would still be the exact same person I am today.

Another good point has been made. Why not change it now? Because somethings that happened in the past, you can't change now. You can't undo an action once you've done it. So, the entire point of changing an event in your life isn't always because you're uncomfortable with your present character, but could also be just to change a bad memory, say a last word to a dead friend, or something of that nature.

And somethings just aren't feasibly possible to change. Like someone mentioned, their family was dysfunctional. Really, there isn't too much that can be done about that.

Besides, who said being a different person would be bad? Yes, I know the answers I'll get from someone will be things like "I'm comfortable with who I am, and don't want to be anyone else." It's not like you're cheating fate or the gods or even yourself if you do so. Wouldn't you think just like you are now, assuming you didn't know you had gone back to relive time? Wouldn't you have the same mindset, that you don't want to change a thing? I guess this question teeters on the assumption that you wouldn't know that you had changed things.[/SIZE]

[Semjaza]

Considering some people do not think this is possible, I don't know why I'm bothering to say it: I wouldn't change anything.

Now, this isn't because I don't regret things or wish things didn't happen or whatever else. There's lots of things I would have liked to have gone differently or times when I wish I acted in a different way. However, when I think about this subject, I tend to think mostly about what it would affect outside of itself.

So, for example, my dad died when I was younger. Sure, it was terrible at the time (I gradually got past it). Would undoing that be a positive thing? I don't really think so. As much as I have missed him at times, I'm happy with my family life now and I wound up with a great step-father (yeah, he can be bad at times; who can't be though?) and two little brothers. If I undid that, I don't know where I'd be right now or how anything else would have wound up. Replacing a bad thing with a good thing won't necessarily have good effects down the road. Your future after that point would be completely reset as well.

I apply that idea to everything. For all the crappy things in my life that have happened and all the crappy things that still happen, I am happy with where I am right now. I wouldn't want to risk ruining that by changing other things... even if I think it wouldn't hurt. Things are more connected to eachother than most would initially think.

[Sea Of Chaos666]

There is so much stuff I could change. But...there is nothing that I would change. If you change the pain of your past it could effect the happiness of your futer. Do you get what I'm saying. You gain thing from mistakes. I remember when I was in the 6th grade I was crying because my Aunt died and I hade got the news at school. So I went to the bathroom and I cryed. In there there was another girl. She said," hey girl why are you crying?" I told her and from that day we became good friends.
At the time if I went back a saved my aunt from getting shot I would not have this great friend. I still have this great friend and she is allways there for me, I would like to thank my Aunt for everything she has done for me. I will always be praying for her.

[SpiritWolf]

If I could change my past, I'd go back and take all of the opportunities I was too blind to see until it was too late. I'd go back and maybe fix my life.

[Minako]

As for me, I wouldn't change a thing. Yes, I've done stupid things and I'm not ashamed of that. As many have said, you learn from your mistakes and it makes you a better person. I'm not saying I haven't made mistakes, I have and many at that! I learned from them, and still am. I make mistakes ALL THE TIME :animeswea but it's ok.

In a nutshell, I wouldn't change a thing. Not one decision, not one mistake, nothing. I do not regret anything I have done.