popularity question

[Coltonw911]

What makes people popular? I ask this cause in the begining of this year I was really popular but ive lost cool points , alot of them.Does anyone else have this problem?

[Sui Generis]

[COLOR=Indigo]Popular with whom?

There are so many different ways you can be popular. Some people require that you be the hottest person in school, be the star sports player, and be rich.

Other people just want you to be a nice person. The trick is to really not worry about it, because think about it...soon enough it won't even matter. You'll go into the "Real world" and these people you are trying to impress won't even matter anymore.

Don't waste your time trying to be popular, in fact don't even worry about it, just have fun. Thats what the youth is for anyways.[/COLOR]

[Torrid]

Cool points? Hey, if you think you're cool, then that's your own opinion. Nobody keeps score of how popular you are.


I have no idea what makes people popular. I'm nowhere near that but they tend to talk a lot.

[Corey]

[quote name='Torrid']Nobody keeps score of how popular you are.[/quote]
[size=1]Unfortunately, some people do.

It's very sad that our society has become so image based. Where I go to school, you're only cool if you spend insane amounts of money on clothes that look like they've been worn to shreads.
I overheard someone talkng today about how they bought this pair of pants for $120. I looked, and there were huge holes in the knees and patches were sewn just about everywhere.
I could make that for about five bucks. But the name is all that matters.
Some stupid thing like Ecko or Phat Farm.

It makes me sad that these kids that buy $80 t-shirts and $200 shoes will be in debt up to their eyeballs for the rest of their lives.

Forget being cool. It's a waste of time and effort.
Plus I'm pretty sure it causes cancer.[/size]

[Guest Innocent_angel]

I suppose a lot depends on the school and the atmosphere around the school. I had never considered myself popular in 'hung around with the right clique' sort of way. I refused to be part of groups if they were based off so called 'popularity scores'.

It wasn't until graduation that I realized that not only did I make friends with every year, almost everyone knew me :wow: I just hung around with everyone. So in a sense I guess I was popular.

College changes popularity a bit. There are still groups but it's subtle, and well there is a bit more maturity so that helps. Also it does depend on the college you go to.

And I so hate to say this, but popularity is still in the real world. It's a natural human repsonse for people to want to concregate with those who are 'popular' if only because there is a chance for advancement, or in a hunter gatherer sense more of a chance not to be picked off by the predators. So there will always be a golden boy in the business and it's not bad it's just good to be aware of it.

As for the main question. It's a lot of things. Main thing, don't care if your popular or not, worrying about that speaks mildly of desperation. Besides if you don't care, then there is that sense that you're better than the "popular'' ones, and in comes the reverse psychology, obviously, 'if you don't care if you're popular, then you must be' it's a strange dynamic.

But really poplularity is bunk, do what you want and have fun doing it. There will always be someone who is not going to approve and if you spent the energy to listening to it, then you're just going to make your life miserable.

Popularity is not the be all and end all. It's nice but not enough to sacrifice who you are for it. Besides the only friends that count are those that like you for who you are and thats enough..

Remember:

A friend with bail you out of jail, but a best friend will be in there with yo saying "damn that was fun". ~No idea, but I'm thinking a comedian... I'm thinking Jeff Foxworthy not sure :animeswea

[Kamuro]

Its quite unfortunate that the popular people, who are actually known by many, really aren't worth knowing. Most of the "popular" people from my school are stuck-up and condescending. It has a lot to do with looks if you ask me, have you ever seen an obese popular person? No, you havn't, because they don't exist. Now there might be a chunky girl that follows the popular girls around everywhere, but they don't count. Have you ever seen a really skinny nerdy looking popular guy? No, you havn't, because they don't exist either. This is unfortunate, cause some really nice people don't fit the "popular" mold and are treated like crap because of it.

[Box Hoy]

In the past couple of years I've seen a twist in who and what is popular and cool. At my school we've switched it around. The "popular" kids of the time we're pretty much the preps or the britney spears slutty wannabees. Now it's like goths and anime freaks running the school. Sorry for the stereotype but it's true.
I would say that you just need to have fun and hang out. If you really think that it's that big of an issue just start complaining about how the popular people act and how dumb they look becuase more than likely there's more than just you who thinks the popular kids are being dumb.

[Lunai]

[font=trebuchet ms][color=darkgoldenrod]I have never figured out the criteria for "cool" while I was in high school. All I know is this:

I was picked on
I got along better with kids who were older & younger than me
And when I stopped worrying about it, I felt a lot better about myself.

There shouldn't be cool points. Unfortunately there are. The best thing you can do is be happy with yourself.[/font][/color]

[Kairi]

[COLOR=DarkSlateGray][SIZE=1]hhmmm...interesting points. I definitly agree that all school environments are different in their own way...I myself grew up in a very large high school, filled with many different kinds of groups and clicks.

"Be in the world...but not of the world." I'm not one to let others dictate my life...holding a strong, firm foundation with myself and my convictions. I was concidered to be popular, but for different reasons. Like everyone else has been saying...to be your own person...to be comfortable with yourself is the key.

Best thing is to try and understand and accept different forms of living...while at the same time strengthaning and reforming your own. "If you show others respect...sooner or later someone will take notice and give it right back to you." If that means being unpopular for a while...then so be it. I hate classifying things anyway:)...who says ones cooler than another. A geek, gay, goth, prep, jock; honestly...who cares:)

And if someone can have that kind of mindset...truly being free in that kind of harsh environment that we tend to be raised up in...I can garentee you...that someone...maybe be many or few (im my case many, cause I'm a leader and councelor at heart), someone will take notice of you and ask themselves..."what's so different about this one...she/he isn't like the rest''

"It's not till we've lost everything...till we're free to do anything."
"Believe in yourself, create your own destiny, and don't fear failure."[/SIZE][/COLOR]

[Minako]

I agree with several people in this thread that popularity differs from school to school. I went to a parochial (christian, in this case, Lutheran) school where one's parents has to pay an arm and a leg to have them at that school. (I'm now an exchange student...more on that later) Almost 2/3 of my school are those preps who pay $120 for jeans and shirts. They are usually pretty stuck up and bratty. Once we were playing volleyball in P.E. class, and I missed the ball. The preppy girl next to me said "I guess that was a good try.." Yeah. :animeangr

Now that I'm a foreign exchange student, popularity is completely different. Here (in Finland) you're popular if you wear nice decent clothes (think sort of suit type material..it's hard to explain)(there are no short shorts or low-cut tops here! it's great!) and you have good grades and you have lots of friends. Another thing about being here is that nobody really cares. I have friends from all over the spectrum, popular people included. It's just that popluarity is soo different here! Here, classes don't matter, I have friends that are younger and older than me (I had that in the States too), and [B]nobody cares![/B] I like that part here.

When I was in grade school, I had this thing about being popular. My friends were trying to help me but they weren't popular either. :animesigh I eventually gave up on that and accepted myself for who I am, it didn't matter whether or not I was popular.

I can't say what it [I]means[/I] to be popular, or how you get that way. All I know is that I don't want to be that way. There's a saying that goes like this: "It's better to have a small group of close friends than a big group of acquaintances." I love my friends, they are so great, and I wouldn't change who I am for the world.

[PWNED]

I myself couldn't give a crap about popularity since if you have the money to spend on real Van Dutch gear then why don't you do something honourable with the money like donating it to a charity or paying back debts to people that you borrowed money off of. I find that the popular people at my school are the morons, the ethnics and the class clowns. I myself have quite a few friends but I don't count because I am a Nerd and being a nerd makes you the bottom of the food chain.

I also used to be picked on but I made a stand and stared down one of the biggest bullies. He knew I wasn't someone to be trifled with so he backed away. If you show that you are not scared of them then they will give you a measure of respect which will add to popularity. And to add to my fact, I don't know whow you can be popular it just seems to happen.

[Iron_Inuyasha]

Hmm...i really dunno...but i am a nice person...and i have tons of friends...it means more than one thing to others... :animestun

[Juu]

[size=1]I think the word 'popular' is taken out of context...

You could fit the stereotype by how you look/how you dress/who you date/what clubs you're in/etc, but doesn't popularity mean how well-liked you are and by how many? I mean, honestly, there's plenty of people at my school who have expensive clothes and try far too hard to get attention via appearance, but it just doesn't work because they're not interesting to talk to whatsoever. And by making themselves look so uptight with being so concerned about what they wear, it makes them appear less approachable, so they don't have any friends. It's just the two of them.

Also, the 'popular ghetto Asian posse' at school... they never talk to each other and look really really bored during lunch, lol. On occasion, a sixth grader will cross the territory line and they'll start picking on them because they stepped on their air force ones, but otherwise, they look miserable. If that's what popularity is considered as - just sitting around in overpriced clothes with a group of people who don't know my birthday/last name - I'd pass. I don't see why it's so important to people. Just one person I can trust completely and confide in is more than enough for me, and I feel fortunate to have such a best friend I can trust totally. :)[/size]

[Kiyu-chan]

You know, that's what's so funny about popularity...no one really knows why certain people are popular, and others aren't.

In my experience so far, and especially at my school...the popular ones tend to be the jackas---I mean, the jerks that no one really likes but everyone thinks are so cool just the same. I don't understand that at all. And sadly, that's just how it is. I always find myself wondering why it is that my friends aren't popular, because they are the nicest people I've ever had the good fortune to know.

But maybe that's just it. Maybe popularity is just slang for "I'm the biggest jerk in the world" or something like that. Because it seems like everyone popular must pick on the less popular. If someone has expensive clothes they're popular. But the people who shop at the thrift stores and have cooler clothing are picked on. I don't quite understand that.

I'm not sure where you'd classify me...I'm just kind of...there, you know? I know the popular kids, and they actually talk to me, which is rather scary actually...So I'm just in the middle.

So what am I saying? Popularity's no where near what it's cracked up to be. Trust me. I've been there. And it's not based on the people. It's based on what they have.

[AlishaKitten]

*laughs* This is kind of a funny question but what I think what makes people popular is probably looks or something like that... Maybe it's because it's who you are? You know like a prep or something... But who knows? I don't...

But is this suppost to help you become more "popular"? Because if it is I see a desperate person...

I really don't care for popularity. I could really care less about that topic. As long as you have some really great friends that will fight with you in a battle then who needs popularity? Even if that means it's only one person that would go through hell with you. Popularity really means nothing...

[Baron Samedi]

[size=1]I think some people are confusing popularity with the 'cool' factor. You don't need to dress in expensive clothes to be popular but you'll find that a lot of the kids who you may think of as being 'cool', do. Popularity all relates to if people like you. Thats it. Do you get on well with most people? Do you speak to every other person in the hallway? Do you have a large circle of close friends? If so, then the odds are you're popular.

Coolness is a different thing entirely though. You don't need to have many friends, in fact, the general thing is that you only consort with a bunch of elite 'cool' kids....because, if you're cool, you're [b]too cool[/b] for anyone else.

Popularity and cool are different things.[/size]

[Kamuro]

Yes, agreed, popularity and cool are different, but most people using here are probably using the term loosely. Cool people is what they were referring to, not so much popular, if your using the exact definition. However, popular and cool often go hand in hand when it comes to people in general.

[Gelgoog Pilot]

PAH! I don't need any of you! I have 3 Bigillion cool points. That's right I've been keeping score ;)

Exhibit A: Gelgoog....While in High school a loser. Talked with half the people that went to his school thus somewhat popular. However, Gelgoog was extremely cheap, (parents love the whole work ethic stuff) and couldn't afford decent clothing. So most people no doubt knew 90% of his wardrobe within a month. Because of his lack of willingness to blow his cash away on clothing, (alright I did it on videogames) he was 'uncool'. On a minor note, he was liked by more people than some of the 'cool' kids.

Exhibit B: Some random 'cool' kid that went toGelgoog's school. Popular, 'cool', terrible at anything that required a brain. That's right! Gelgoog could not believe it either, being 'cool' actually requires no brain. Was good-looking, some what ok in sports, (Better than Gelgoog anyway) considered 'cool', although most people thought he was a jerk. Could afford $50 shirts because his parents gave him money, did not work for his money by getting two jobs, did not attend college, still lives with his parents.

In the end...Gelgoog also still lives at his parents house, (lol) however is moving out this summer, does go to college, is still liked by more people, and he is totally fine with never being 'cool'.

That was my whole case study on coolness...take it or leave it people. It's ok I suppose to be cool, just don't let it get to your heads that it makes you better than anyone else. Instead work your Arse off like Gelgoog so you can afford to get into college. :rolleyes:

[TOTALIMMORTAL]

Well, when you're young and a girl, chest size would play a pretty big role.

[Baron Samedi]

[quote name='TOTALIMMORTAL']Well, when you're young and a girl, chest size would play a pretty big role.[/quote][SIZE=1]... Or not ~_^[/SIZE]

[Gelgoog Pilot]

[quote name='Baron Samedi][SIZE=1']... Or not ~_^[/SIZE][/quote]
Those were my thoughts exactly Baron LOL!

[Your Mother]

[quote name='Baron Samedi][SIZE=1']... Or not ~_^[/SIZE][/quote]

What? I don't get it.

[TOTALIMMORTAL]

Seriously though.....I don't know how it works usually, but I know at my high school the popular kids are usually the really funny people, really hot chicks, or good musicians. I'd like to think I'm sorta popular, not that it really matters to me. Since I'm guitarist/singer for my band a lot of people know me through that, and popularity is basically how many people know you, right?

[Gelgoog Pilot]

That's exactly what popularity is, a measure of how many people knw you and well like you. If you were hated by everyone yet they still knew you I'd say you'd be more infamous than popular. :animeswea

People just keep messing up the meaning of being 'cool' with being popular. So yeah you can be Popular and not be cool. That's the rub.

[Havokio]

[COLOR=Indigo]I'm only popular to the people I know, as though they accually give a damn about me. That's all the popularity you need.

Don't worry bout everyone else, the'll just get in the way (of your life).

L8R.[/COLOR]