Nomura Posted November 30, 2005 Share Posted November 30, 2005 This is a fairly short chapter, that I've just written. I was planning on putting on Fanfic.net...but their way of loading this on to the computer to post it is hard, and plus...well Otaku is my internet home! Well enjoy... By the way, it takes place after the long journey to the land of the mist. EDIT: Oh yeah, please rate and give details if you read this... [B]Chapter One: A deadly traveler[/B] My name...It isn?t important. But I might as well tell you anyway. Uchiha Sasuke. Yes, I am the last of the Uchiha clan. I shall restore it. I shall restore my clan. I will get revenge. I?ve sworn to kill someone. Until we meet again, I need to be the strongest I can be. How could Naruto defeat Haku when I couldn?t? How? I awoke this morning to travel into the forest before Kakashi?s stupid games. I would train my heart out if it meant being able to destroy all of my enemies, my kunai ready, and my shuriken blades in my tan-colored back pack. My first mission, to try to master the solid Doppleganger technique. Just because Naruto can do it doesn?t mean he?s superior. I still wonder how he?s gotten as good as me in these past few weeks. We might need to have a fight so I can study his moves even more. I kept walking, and soon got to the forest-edge. The rising sun lit up the forest dimly, which was just enough for me to see the forest trails. I glanced back at Konaha village, to make sure I wasn?t being followed, and started swiftly into the forest. I could hear different animals cry in the distance. A flock of birds flew to the sky as an animal stepped closer nearby. No...Not an animal, but a human. I quickly jumped to a nearby tree branch and watched. So far, I couldn?t tell if he was a ninja or not. He didn?t wear a Hitai-ate or a shuriken holster. His blue hair fell down from under his traveler?s hat. His black sleeve-less shirt was frayed, as were his red travel pants and sandals. I didn?t make a sound. I stayed silent. But somehow he knew. He knew where I was, and turned around, until he faced me completely. ?Who?s there?? he called out to the tree branch. I grabbed my kunai, and held it up. ?What are you doing here?? I exclaimed. I peered over my shoulder to see where he was. He was gone. I turned around again, to see his scarred face ten inches away. He was standing on the branch, with a kunai knife held behind his back. ?Just your average traveler,? he said with an evil smile on his face. I jumped from the tree, and threw my kunai at all angles. He had no place to dodge the one coming straight at him. I realized, that I should be ready. A replacement-jitsu was likely. I took more kunai, and this time, held them as daggers, and not to throw. The kunai knifes I had thrown, surprisingly hit him. I gasped for air, as a flying leg swung into my stomach. How? I looked around to see more than one blue haired scar-faced maniac. The sacred dopple-ganger technique! The one I want to learn. The one Naruto knows... But, this couldn?t be Naruto. He was different. He used the technique like it was a casual thing. This traveler was laid-back, and each time I tried to fight back, he would simply step away from my reach, laying another fist or kick to me. I had to figure out a way to defeat him. I must defeat him... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest KILLERINSTINCT Posted November 30, 2005 Share Posted November 30, 2005 nice ^^ i ad mire it and bravo on making it so dramatic ^^ *clappes hands with gun* Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nomura Posted December 4, 2005 Author Share Posted December 4, 2005 Um...thanks. I hope that gun isn't a bad sign... :animeswea Um can you please rate it? You know... like 9 out of ten or 1 out of ten, depending on how much you like it. :animesigh [b]Chapter two: The battle continues[/b] My fight with the man continued. I shamefully struggled hard. I finally managed to take down a few doppelgangers, but he was too strong. I stood up, after being hit to the ground. I collapsed again. My wounds were bleeding more and more. I tried to stand once again, but he pushed his foot unto my back. ?This is the power of the Uchiha clan? Pathetic,? he whispered into my ear. ?Who are you?? I exclaimed, trying to force him off. ?My name is Zakanaru of the Land of clouds...and you are Sasuke Uchiha, my prey...? A shuriken flew down from the tree tops. I gasped, for I could now breath, as Zakanaru was sent flying off of me. Kakashi broke his fall, with a kunai knife, planted into his back. The Zakanaru that just defeated me, was actually a doppelganger, and faded away. ?Sasuke, what the h-? Kakashi started, but was sent flying as another Zakanaru attacked. I tried to get up, but failed, so I crawled over to a tree, and leant against it. I wiped the blood from my mouth, and watched, as Kakashi sent punches in every direction. His white hair flew in every direction too. Zakanaru?s blue hair and traveler?s hat, barely bounced as he dodged every fist. I watched Kakashi fight even more, until, I felt someone pick me up and carry me away from the battle. I looked up to see Kakashi?s dark mask, then looked back at Kakashi battling Zakanaru. ?How?? I asked him. ?Sharingan...Don?t forget I can copy his moves.? he said, as he jumped over a fallen log and darted towards the forest edge. Me? I dozed off into a long sleep. My dreams weren?t pleasant, as I fought Zakanaru over and over again in my head, until he finally stabbed me to death with a kunai knife... The strangest part of the nightmare was Naruto, Sakura, and Kakashi dying, as they battled endlessly with Zakanaru. Each time they died, I felt strange in the pit of my stomach... [i]Have I fallen for these weaklings?[/i] I kept dreaming. Like a maze I couldn?t get out of. Then, I thought...[i] Is this a chance to study his moves?[/i] I suddenly saw it... His battle technique... [i]His death[/i]. [i]His demise. [/i][b]Chapter Three: thinking [/b] I awoke several hours later, on a raggy old couch. I grunted, and pushed myself up from the disgusting thing. Around me, stood a teary Sakura, with Naruto and Kakashi. I frowned and looked down at my scarred body. Bandages covered me, my legs were completely casted with bandages, and my hitai-ate was used to stop the bleeding in my left arm. I pulled my headband from my arm, and wrapped it around my head. I stomped over to a coffee table, and grabbed my dark-blue shirt. "Sasuke, your wounds are too-" Kakashi started as he tried to stop me. I pushed him out of my way, and darted for the door. I pushed open Naruto's apartment door, and ran away. Far away, into the forest. I limped to the spot where Zakanaru and I fought before. I began to remember where and when he attacked me. How it hurt...Painful, oh so painful. But now, I have his strategy. I know how he fights... The pit of my stomach howled, and I headed back to the forest edge, back to Konaha, hopefully to get some Ramen at a restaurant. I slept on my apartment roof-top that night, because Sakura and Oni, whom wouldn't stop ringing my door-bell to see if I was okay. Actually, I didn't really sleep... I just thought about how I would attack Zakanaru. Even if I did know his strategy, how would I work out my strategy? Dopplegangers would be everywhere, and it would be almost impossible to get to where he would be settled down... He would form many dopplegangers, and then hide in the tree tops, so if he did get killed or hurt, it wouldn't be him. If you ask me...he's lazy, and afraid. I finally dozed off, and dreamt another dream. Naruto had formed many dopplegangers, and was fighting many Zakanarus. I was jumping up into the treetops to kill Zakanaru. I crept up behind him, on a high tree branch, holding out a kunai knife. But before I slit his throat...I would interogate. "Why do want to kill me?" I asked him, holding my knife around his throat. "I guess it is my time... I shall tell you. You have-" He never finished. Zakanaru never finished what he was saying. Or at least, my dream didn't show that far into the future... [i] What do I have?[/i] [i]What?[/i] Please rate! You can read Chapter one and two in [i] Sasuke's World! [PG] A Naruto fanfic about...not Naruto![/i] [b] Chapter Four: Playing games[/b] The next morning, I went to the fields in which Kakashi made us train. There, was my two comrades, Naruto and Sakura. ?Kakashi?s not her yet, as usual.? Sakura said, with a bitterness in her voice. We waited. Waiting still, I dozed off... Even if the pain in my side was unbearable, I dozed off. Why have I had these dreams? Is it the future? Or is it just a dream? In my dreams, I was floating in a dark place... Then, the place turned into a crystal blue color. Faces floated around me, and then, I was back at the Land of Mist, getting smothered by Haku. I floated some more, and we had just came back from The land of Mist. Then I walked into the forest, and saw the flock of birds fly up into the air. [i]?Sa...Wake....Sasuke...Wake up....? [/i] I awoke to Kakashi?s voice. I looked around at Sakura and Naruto, who were both looking at me like I was sick or something. ?I had to rescue a cat from a tree,? Kakashi said, making up another one of his lame excuses about how he was late. Kakashi lead us out to the forest, to get some herbs for a local clinic. I looked in all the obvious places for herbs, like in bushes, and around water. I walked along a river. I wasn?t looking for herbs. Just thinking. Where did he go? Where in the world was Zakanaru? A bird flew down from the sky, and landed on my shoulder. I looked into its Dark yellow eyes. Its beak had cuts around it, and its feathers were torn and a pale blue color, when I?m sure it was supposed to be a black bird. It looked pitiful. I stared at it. It reminded me of the flock of birds that flew away from Zakanaru, who seemed to suddenly appear in the middle of them. I thought about it. I pulled out my kunai knife and swung it at the bird. I managed to cut off the bird?s talon before it formed a large man. [i]Zakanaru... [/i] Zakanaru grimaced and held his arm out, which was missing a hand. ?My hand!? he screamed in pain. Kakashi and the others darted to the riverside. ?We heard screaming,? Kakashi said. Zakanaru started to form a bird again, but Kakashi quickly grabbed him, and stuck a kunai into his neck. Zakanaru lay lifeless on the ground. It was over. But this wasn?t how my dreams told his death...Maybe they weren?t future telling... Kakashi pushed the body into the river, and lead us away, to give the clinic their herbs, and grab some Ramen to eat at a restaurant. ---------------------------------------------------------------------- Zakanaru sat in the tree tops watching his death. His doppleganger?s death. The white-haired man pushed his body into the river, and lead the three kids away. ?How long shall I play games with these fools?? he asked himself. So, please rate, and chapter 5 will be here soon! Chapter five: Relaxing with Sakura I walked along the roads of Konaha, and stopped at Sakura?s house. Why not pay a visit? I?ve never done it before, and it might get all this madness off my mind. Why am I doing this? I thought to myself, as I pushed the doorbell. A blonde-headed woman answered the door, her green eyes, glimmering to the morning sunshine. ?Is Sakura home?? I asked her. Mrs. Haruno smiled and lead me into the house. The inside was pink, and had an unusual amount of cherry blossoms. They liked them so much, they even named their child after them..., I thought, trying to hold back a laugh ?So, you must be this cutie boy, Sakura always talks about,? She chuckled, pointing up the stairs at a yellow door. I walked up the stairs and knocked on Sakura?s door. Sakura opened the door. Her hair was in every direction, and her pajamas were still on. It was almost noon, and she had just woke up. She looked surprised to see me, and shut the door in my face. She opened the door once more, but instead, had her usual pink, red, and yellow clothes style, with an actually good-looking hairstyle. ?Sasuke! What are you doing here?? she asked, welcoming me into her pink and red themed room. ?Just wanted to drop by...? I said, looking at a few pictures of Sakura and her family. The pictures were nice. They?re like the family I?ve never had. The one I longed for when I was little... ?Hey, Sakura, want to go get some lunch or something?? I asked. Sakura blushed, and smiled. ?Yes, I?d love to!? She said to me in a cutesy voice. I?ll have to admit. For these couple of months, Naruto, Sakura and Kakshi have changed me. Maybe change isn?t so bad...Maybe change is better... Maybe change won?t last forever, and I should live it before its gone...While I?m still alive. Sakura and I walked to a fancy restaurant. Along the way, she was blushing, as red as her blouse. It was pretty obvious that she was trying to grab my hand every two seconds, but was two shy...It made me laugh a little. Laughing? What?s wrong with me? I?m so happy... I?ve never been happy... I guess....because I?ve never tried... ?What?s so funny?? Sakura asked. ?Nothing...? I said. Sakura and I walked into the restaurant and got a table. ?Sasuke, why-? Sakura started, but was cut off by the waiter?s voice, who was asking us what we wanted. We ordered, and Sakura asked me again. ?Sasuke, why have you suddenly...you know, noticed me?? She asked, picking up some sushi with her chop-sticks. ?Just wanted a relaxing day, to cool me off ...I mean, after Zakanaru and all...? But I didn?t know Zakanaru wasn?t dead. My mistake. I took Sakura home, several hours later, after walking in the park and talking. We stood on her door step, as the sky began to get an orange color. ?I had fun, Sasuke? Sakura giggled, blushing even more. ?Me too... Sakura.? I said, looking into her green eyes. Let?s just say two words... Goodnight kiss. Please rate! Ch. 6 will be here soon! [font=Verdana][size=1][color=Red]Nomura, please don't post a new thread for each chapter again. It's perfectly possible to simply [i]edit[/i] your original post to include the new information, and it creates less clutter in the OB Anthology forum. ^-^ -- Lady Asphyxia.[/color][/size][/font] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lady Asphyxia Posted December 4, 2005 Share Posted December 4, 2005 [font=Arial][size=2]Not a bad effort. While you do have a couple of plot twists, you need to draw them out a little longer; make more of a thing of Zakanaru's death and the relief everyone feels, so that when we go to him sitting in a tree, it's a sinister and shocking thing. I think focusing on feelings could help your story, too. You have a lot of of your character's thoughts in there, which is good, but his feelings -- relief when his attacker dies, confusion about his friends and the fact that they are friends; that sort of thing needs to come through as well. Your description is quite well laced into your story. It never becomes an overload of information, which is a good thing. ^_^ The only thing I'm going to pick on is the description of the 'blonde-headed woman'. I think that could have been cut down to something like '[i]A blonde answered the door, her green eyes glimmering in the morning sunshine.' [/i]If someone's a blonde, we know you're talking about their head, and by including the pronoun 'her' you give us her gender anyway, so it makes it easier for the reader to be [i]shown[/i] who the person is, not [i]told. [/i]Personally, I'm against giving ratings for writing, because I don't think that's fair. Everyone has different styles and different subjects, and giving ratings mean that a person can be discouraged just because someone doesn't like the style. So I'm not going to rate your work, but I think you did a good job and even though the chapters were quite short -- and you could probably draw those out, it was a fun and easy read.Good job. [/size][/font] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nomura Posted December 6, 2005 Author Share Posted December 6, 2005 Thanks. I've never really liked writing alot in one chapter... I don't think these next two chapters are just awesome, but I wrote 'em a couple of days ago. [B] Chapter six: Helping hands[/B] [COLOR=DarkOrange]Naruto sat on a park bench, with a scowl on his face. Obviously angry, because of the sudden relationship between Sakura and Sasuke. Ino, also upset, walked slowly and sluggishly through the park, to Naruto's bench. "What are you so bummed about?" Ino asked Naruto, sitting on the bench. "That fricking crap-head, Sasuke..." he muttered "What's your problem?" "The big fore-headed nerd, Sakura..." Ino replied glumly. Naruto's stomach growled as if a lion. "Wanna go get some Ramen?" he asked Ino. "Sure..."[/COLOR] -------------------------------------------- I lay wide awake in my bed. The moon was shining brightly outside my window. I couldn't get the feeling that maybe Zakanaru was still alive, out of my head. [I]What if he is alive?[/I] I got up and walked into my small kitchen, to get a glass of water. [I]Then[/I],I heard it. The flutter of wings, from outside my apartment door. I grabbed a kunai knife from the kitchen counter, and stepped slowly to the door. I opened the door, and held my knife over my head, ready to strike. [I]Noone.[/I] Noone was at my door. I peered out into the hallway, as a hand grabbed me, and pulled me back into my room. Zakanaru was in my room, alive as ever. "Meet me in the forest tomorrow, or else," he growled. "Or else what?" I asked, gripping my kunai more. "Or else your girlfriend's throat'll be slit." Zakanaru exclaimed, his blue hair shining along with the moon. "Sakura!" I gasped, holding my kunai up to strike Zakanaru. My blade hit his chest, and he merely disappeared into the night. My chest beating heavily, I began to worry. [I]How can I save her[/I], I thought. I stepped outside to cool off. I began to walk down the street when a voice stopped me. "Tomorrow, 'ay?" the voice called out from an ally to my right. Shikamaru stepped out of the ally, with his hands in his pockets and a toothpick in his mouth. "How'd you know tonight was a goodnight to eavesdrop?" Naruto's voice called out to Shikamaru. Ino and Naruto stepped out of the ally to left. "Listen...I ain't a big fan of yours...but I'm gonna help ya' creme this guy!" Shikamaru exclaimed, spitting out his toothpick. "If Shihikamaru helps...then so will I." Ino said. Naruto just grunted and nodded. Though I hate having to be helped, I'm no fool. One man alone can't defeat Zakanaru. [I]And, there's a price on the line this time...[/I] Hope ya liked, and yes, Ino and Naruto, are basically going out, if you will. :animeswea Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KKC Posted December 9, 2005 Share Posted December 9, 2005 [size=1]*thinks of Naruto and Ino* Ewww! That's just creepy! Hehe. Anyways, I've been reading this sense you put it up and I guess i'm over due for a post. Let me first say that you do a good job at first person writing. I'm so used to third person that when I have to write in first person I screw it up alot. I think it's an interesting story, but there are a few questions and comments I have. First, when you say doppleganger do you mean the bunshin no jutsu when Naruto makes clones of himself? Or is it some other jutsu that also involves clones and copies? These next two comments/questions are only if It is the same as the Bunshin jutsu. Second, If it is the same technique that Naruto uses, the clone (doppleganger) that Kakashi stabed would've been undone and poof into smoke. When a clone is struck to hard that's what happens (unless Zakanaru is super powerful strong with technique or something) Third, Kakashi already knows how to clones of himself. So, he wouldn't have to use his sharigan in the first chapter. ^^ Asides from the few minor factors i've really enjoyed and I thought the Sakura and Sasuke thing was cute. And ever sense I read this I keep imagining Kakashi poking a body with his foot until falls into a river... then he runs away. [/size] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nomura Posted December 11, 2005 Author Share Posted December 11, 2005 Yes, that was the solid shadow-clone technique Naruto learns in the first episode and chapter of the series. When I say "The clone faded away" or something like that, thats what I mean. the doppleganger died, so to speak. Kakashi sensei only knows shadow-clone, not solid shadow-clones. So, he would use his Sharingan, if he wanted to attack Zakanaru. So...sooner or later, I'll get off my lazy butt and post the next chapter... :animeswea [B]Chapter seven: The final battle begins[/B] I awoke early in the morning and grabbed every weapon I could find, to store in my backpack. My heart, beating harder and faster every second. I arrived in the forest, a couple of minutes later, my weaponry ready. "So...you came," growled Zakanaru, jumping from a nearby tree branch. I looked to my left, to see Sakuratied to a giant oak tree. She had a look of panic on her face. I tried to dart over to her, but Zakanaru grabbed me by the arm, and threw me to the ground. I skidded across the ground, tried to get up, and was sent skidding, as Zakanru kicked me. Behind Zakanaru, I could see Ino cutting Sakura's ropes. "Hey big guy!" A voice called out from behind me. I turned around. There stood a boy I didn't know. He was slim, with a black bowl cut, and a scowl. "W-Who-" I stuttered, to be cut off by Ino's cheerful voice. "Rock Lee! You came!" Ino said, hugging him. "Zakamiru, you're-" "Zakanaru..." Ino whispered to Lee. "Oh, thanks... Zakanaru, you're dead!" Lee exclaimed, and flew into Zakanaru. I was amazed at how fast Lee was. He almost matched Zakanaru. That is, until Zakanaru tagteamed on him... Two Zakanarus beat up on Lee, until he fell to the ground, bleeding heavily. [I]No...Already...Someone is hurt...Dead, even...[/I] "Poor kid...He was a good fighter, too..." Zakanaru laughed evilly. "You'll pay!" shouted Kakashi, as he threw a flying kick into Zakanaru. I fought one Zakanaru, and Kakashi fought another. Knowing Kakashi, this was probably a Sharingan doppleganger. As was mine. Somehow, I had watched Zakanaru, and suddenly known how to do it... [I]Do I have the Uchiha Sharingan blood? [/I] My doppleganger, was beaten and almost done for, when hundreds of Naruto flew from the tree tops, taking Zakanaru by surprise. Zakanru, even if surprised, still made hundreds of himself in a flash. An army of Naruto fought an army of Zakanaru. [I]A seemingly endless batlle... [/I] I watched and waited, for the right moment. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nina Posted January 2, 2006 Share Posted January 2, 2006 wow, personally I think this is a great story. I don't know much about Naruto so I was impressed by your knowledge of the characters and their personalities. I also like how you knew the names of the weapons and the techniques. I enjoyed it and hope you post more soon. As for rating, I'd say atleast an 8 or 9...but that's me. I really liked how you kept Sasuke's character even when he was in a sort of romance thing with Sakura. I think you did great in keeping the charcters with thier original personalities, unlike most fanfics. TTFN. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Riku Posted January 2, 2006 Share Posted January 2, 2006 [FONT=Comic Sans MS][SIZE=1][COLOR=RoyalBlue]I totally love this Sasuke fanfic of yours and can't wait to read some more! XD Your fanfic is totally awesome because you keep everyone's behavior the same as they are in the anime and manga. Also, the way that you make it so action-packed and full of plots, it makes me want to read it some more. Of course, it might just be because I love Naruto a lot, but no... it's your story. XD Totally loved the part with the date of Sasuke and Sakura. So kawaii! I wonder if they'll turn out to be a real item in the end. And Narutaro and Ino going out togther?? *Thinks a bit* Hmm... never though of that, but... would Ino really go out with Naruto after laying her eyes on Sasuke? Hm.... weird... XD Anyways, totally loved it and can't wait to read more! PM me sometime and I could show you my Saskue fanfic I've been writing! 10 out of 10 I say! XD[/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nomura Posted January 2, 2006 Author Share Posted January 2, 2006 LOL, thanks you guys! Sorry, I havn't been posting alot since I've been so busy...so I'm gonna try to post the next chapter today... CAUTION!: IF YOU DON'T WANNA SEE YOUR FAVE CHARACTERS DIE....WELL TOO BAD... [B]Chapter Eight: Death of comrades[/B] [COLOR=DarkGreen]Sasuke went flying as Zakanaru stabbed and kicked him even more. Kakashi, near-by jumped in the middle of the battle, trying to save Sasuke from any more attacks. "I'm not gonna let my comrade die!" He shouted, charging at Zakanaru. A kunai peirced through his heart from behind. Sasuke, slowly melted back into a Zakanaru doppleganger. "Gotcha," said the sick voice of Zakanaru. "You" croaked Kakashi, falling to the ground in a heap, blood dripping down his body... [/COLOR] ------------------------------------------- [COLOR=Sienna]Shikamaru ran through the forest, trying to find the real Zakanaru. He ran until he came to a river edge. Zakanaru sat at the edge, his feet in the water. "Seperated from the pack, huh? You...must be real...You pain in the butt!" Shikamaru exclaimed, triggering his "Me-and-my-shadow-jitsu". Shikamaru tried hard to hold on to Zakanaru with his shadow, but it was almost impossible, until finaly, he got him long enough to kill him. "My life means yours...A shinobi...like me'lll take that price!" Shikamru said, holding a kunai up to his throat. Such a sad story. Shikamaru killed himself to kill Zakanru, but sadly, he only killed a doppleganger... [/COLOR] ----------------------------------------------- [COLOR=Pink]Ino and Sakura ran through thge forest, all the way to Konahagakure village. Along the way, they met Kakashi, who invited them inside his apartment to hide...[/COLOR] Ino, Sakura, Kakashi, Shikamaru,and Rock Lee...Are Dead... LOL, That one was kinda short, but I still wanted to give this chapter to show you guys what else was happening, at the time of Sasuke's battle. P.S. Shikamaru's me and my shadow jitsu....Whatever shikamaru does when he captures you in his shadow, you do. So, when he killed himself, Zakanaru also died. But..of course...it was...just a doppleganger... :animecry: So...I'll think of something good for the next chapter! Thanks for the criticism and such! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nina Posted January 4, 2006 Share Posted January 4, 2006 OMG! totaly dropped that one on my head. It was awesome, Kakashi dies? *tear* You noted that Ino, Sakura, Kakashi, Shikamaru,and Rock Lee were dead, but the only one you really explained was Kakashi's death. Are you going to explain the others in future chapters? I'd like to see that. Yet again, great work with the personality keeping. I love it when stories do that. :D Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nomura Posted January 5, 2006 Author Share Posted January 5, 2006 LOL, Nina, the point of this chapter was to look a lil' between the lines... Well, I'll explain. Kakashi- Duh, he was killed by Zakanru, pretending to be Sasuke. You know that one. Shikamaru- Shikamaru's shadow technique takes control of your body, and you must do what he does. Shikamru, killed himself, thinking that the real Zakanaru was dying along with him. Ino and Sakura-Kakashi was dead at the moment, LOL, so how could he invite them into his home? Exactly...A doppeganger looking like Kakashi...They went in, and were obviously killed. Rock Lee- Don't remember? He was killed in chapter seven. Well....Ch. 9 should be on the way, sooner or later. I'd like to thank all the people who are reading my posts and liking them! As for the ones who don't quite enjoy 'em...well maybe my stories aren't your thing! So anyway, adios amigos! LOL.. P.S, Nina, Keyblade Wielder...mind if you get put on my budd list? EDIT: Finally got the next chapter written, and there will be one more. This story is only a ten chapter gig, LOL. Well, here's Chapter nine. [B]Chapter nine: Beginning to the End, Vice Versa[/B] My gut pulsed with pain. I had a feeling, now, that some friends were dying. Just a feeling... It?s funny, I never even liked these guys...now they?re close to me... Naruto and Zakanaru went on. Blood flying. Zakanru finished off the last of Naruto?s doppelgangers, and glanced into the tree-tops, where I was hiding. Crap, he knows, I thought, jumping from my position before he attacked. In one swift movement of his hand, a giant shuriken flew towards me. I closed my eyes. [I]This is it! I?m going to die... The Uchiha clan will never be restored, and I?ll never...Never Kill my-[/I] I heard the sound of a blade hitting a body. I felt no pain, so I opened my eyes. On the branch, defending me, was Kiba, his arm severed, where the blade had hit him. ?Akamaru felt a chakra...What?s going...on...here...?Kiba whispered before fainting. My anger swept over me at that moment. He?s taken every thing from me! My eyes turned...Full-blown Sharingan, even stronger than when I was fighting with Haku. My chakra flowing, I ran down the tree I was perched on, and cut off Zakanaru?s arm. My kunai knife dripping with his blood, I turned around to see if Naruto was still okay. Bruised and battered, he got off the ground. I looked over my shoulder for a second. Again, Zakanaru, had disappeared. Like in my dream, I followed his foot steps until I was behind him, my kunai around his neck. I asked him why he wanted to kill me, like in my dream. ?You have...never cared.? He muttered. ?What?? I exclaimed. ?Everything has been meaningless to you. Now, several of your friends are dead, and my death will never bring them back...? He muttered, a tear falling from his face. For some reason, a tear fell from my face too. I closed my eyes, and opened them again, to be in front of... [I]Myself. [/I] A younger me, crying. My brother, bringing pain within words. I?ve never cared... [I]Never. [/I] [I]Why now? [/I] I closed my eyes again... Relief struck me to what I saw. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Riku Posted January 5, 2006 Share Posted January 5, 2006 [FONT=Comic Sans MS][SIZE=1][COLOR=RoyalBlue]Oh my gosh! I so totally dont mind if you add me as a friend!! I've always wanted to talk to you! Oh, and by the way, Gorillaz and Feel Good Inc. rules! I'll add you too! Anyways, back to your story... XD OMG!! How could you make Sakura die? I thought Sasuke and Sakura were an item! Oh well... Anyways, this chapter is pretty good and I like it. Poor Sasuke... all he really wants to do is take revenge for his Clan... I feel as though I am closer to him now than I ever was. Nomura, you are flipping awesome!! Can't wait to read some more! Oh yeah, go Feel Good Inc.!!! W00T!! XD[/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nomura Posted January 6, 2006 Author Share Posted January 6, 2006 Cool, well, this chapter will be the last of Sasuke's world :animecry: Any questions before I post the next story?EDIT: I guess none...well, here we go! [B]Chapter Ten: End of Pain[/B] I opened my eyes again, and relief struck me to what I saw. ?Sasuke...Sa...?said a distant voice. Sakura?s voice. She...was...[I]alive?[/I] ?Where-Where am I?? I choked out. I looked around, this un-familiar place. But I noticed...It was familiar. It was the bridge that Tazuna was building. In the distance, Zabuza and Kakashi were talking. Naruto wasn?t anywhere to be seen. Kakashi?s fist went through Haku?s chest, as he suddenly appeared in front of Zabuza. So, Naruto didn?t kill Haku...Kakashi did. Then, was that all a dream? Zabuza soon, brought up tears of sadness, and stunned by HAku?s death, he plundered himself into a crowd of Gato?s men, killing many of them, including Gato. [I]We buried Haku beside Zabuza afterwards. [/I] We finally arrived back in Konahagakure. I was restless, and tired. I went back to my apartment, and got some sleep. The next day, I went to the woods to train. The lush green trees shone in the sunlight, and many birds were feeding on seeds and other plants around the ground. I stepped forward, and a large gang of black birds flew into the air. I remembered my dream, and froze. I suddenly hid behind a tree. ?Who?s there?? I called out. I looked out from behind the tree, with my kunai ready. Akamaru barked at me, as we looked each other in the eyes. Kiba stepped behind Akamaru, to see what the problem was. ?Oh, It?s just you,? I muttered, putting my kunai back in my back pack. I turned and walked away from Kiba, not looking back. I walked into the town, to get a bite to eat. A fruit merchant stand stood at the end of the town. I grabbed some grapes, and slapped some money onto the counter of the stand. I turned around to see the merchant one more time. The merchant was wearing a traveler?s hat, with rugged red clothes. His scarred face and blue hair, put off a glow, especially with his toothy smile. ?Hey, you...Have something you might think...is cool,? He said quietly. I approached slowly to him. He looked familiar. [I]So familiar.[/I] ?What do you want, old man?? I exclaimed. ?I have these...? He muttered, holding up a dark blue jewel. ?It?s a Sakuri stone...it?s said to to let you travel back in time...Some people even have the Sakuri stone planted in them when their born...But it only runs in the Uchiha clan...? ?[I]That?s nonsense,[/I] you old fool...? I exclaimed, turning and walking quickly away. What was he talking about...Time travel in the Uchiha clan? Crazy people these days. How dare he even say the Uchiha clan name. That?s just so...unbelievable. Nobody can back in time, and nobody is born with the powers to. I walked until I was close to my apartment, when I saw Naruto running out of his apartment door, screaming. ?What?s wrong, you big chicken?? I said. ?[I]G-G-Ghost[/I]!? Naruto gulped and shouted, pointed at his apartment room. ?[I]What?? [/I] I exclaimed. ?There?s blood all over my couch for some reason! Dry blood! Ghost blood!? He shouted. ?Naruto, I bet you just cut yourself when you were drunk or something...? I muttered, walking away, into my apartment. [I]Crap, today has been weird[/I], I think to myself. [I]Just plain weird. [/I] I do wonder why, that man was familiar, and how come blood, was on Naruto?s couch, but it doesn?t really matter. I still have to train to beat my brother. And, harder I shall train. Harder and harder, until I beat him. But still...I just wonder...Don?t know why... ?Hmm...weird,? I say, eating the rest of my grapes, as I gaze out my window at the pure sunlight. [I]?Just plain weird...?[/I] So whatcha think? LOL, I can't believe this is the end of SW... Wow... Nina-anything else you're wondering 'bout, I can clear it up for ya. Keyblade wielder- I'll make sure to PM ya. Lady Asphyxia-thank you for giving me hints and tips, that'll help me, but I'm not going back to correct everything. In a couple of years I want to look back at all my work to see how I wrote now. Anyway, thanks for being a cool mod. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nina Posted January 11, 2006 Share Posted January 11, 2006 really awesome! sorry, I was a little slow with the last post >.< I love the story though. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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