Nice Guys

[Corey]

[size=1]I'd like to mention that I did not write this, nor do I know who did.
I don't exactly agree with every bit of it either.
Just thought it would be interesting to what kind of conversation is generated from it.

???
[u][i]Nice Guys[/i][/u]
This is a tribute to the nice guys. The nice guys that finish last, that never become more than friends, that endure hours of whining and bitching about what ******** guys are, while disproving the very point. This is dedicated to those guys who always provide a shoulder to lean on but restrain themselves to tentative hugs, those guys who hold open doors and give reassuring pats on the back and sit patiently outside the changing room at department stores. This is in honor of the guys that obligingly reiterate how cute/beautiful/smart/funny/sexy their female friends are at the appropriate moment, because they know most girls need that litany of support. This is in honor of the guys with open minds, with laid-back attitudes, with honest concern. This is in honor of the guys who respect a girl?s every facet, from her privacy to her theology to her clothing style.

This is for the guys who escort their drunk, bewildered female friends back from parties and never take advantage once they?re at her door, for the guys who accompany girls to bars as buffers against the rest of the creepy male population, for the guys who know a girl is fishing for compliments but give them out anyway, for the guys who always play by the rules in a game where the rules favor cheaters, for the guys who are accredited as boyfriend material but somehow don?t end up being boyfriends, for all the nice guys who are overlooked, underestimated, and unappreciated, for all the nice guys who are manipulated, misled, and unjustly abandoned, this is for you.

This is for that time she left 40 urgent messages on your cell phone, and when you called her back, she spent three hours painstakingly dissecting two sentences her boyfriend said to her over dinner. And even though you thought her boyfriend was a chump and a jerk, you assured her that it was all ok and she shouldn?t worry about it. This is for that time she interrupted the best killing spree you?d ever orchestrated in GTA3 to rant about a rumor that romantically linked her and the guy she thinks is the most repulsive person in the world. And even though you thought it was immature and you had nothing against the guy, you paused the game for two hours and helped her concoct a counter-rumor to spread around the floor. This is also for that time she didn?t have a date, so after numerous vows that there was nothing ?serious? between the two of you, she dragged you to a party where you knew nobody, the beer was awful, and she flirted shamelessly with you, justifying each fit of reckless teasing by announcing to everyone: ?oh, but we?re just friends!? And even though you were invited purely as a symbolic warm body for her ego, you went anyways. Because you?re nice like that.

The nice guys don?t often get credit where credit is due. And perhaps more disturbing, the nice guys don?t seem to get laid as often as they should. And I wish I could logically explain this trend, but I can?t. From what I have observed on campus and what I have learned from talking to friends at other schools and in the workplace, the only conclusion I can form is that many girls are just illogical, manipulative bitches. Many of them claim they just want to date a nice guy, but when presented with such a specimen, they say irrational, confusing things such as ?oh, he?s too nice to date? or ?he would be a good boyfriend but he?s not for me? or ?he already puts up with so much from me, I couldn?t possibly ask him out!? or the most frustrating of all: ?no, it would ruin our friendship.? Yet, they continue to lament the lack of datable men in the world, and they expect their too-nice-to-date male friends to sympathize and apologize for the men that are jerks. Sorry, guys, girls like that are beyond my ability to fathom. I can?t figure out why the connection breaks down between what they say (I want a nice guy!) and what they do (I?m going to sleep with this complete *** now!). But one thing I can do, is say that the nice-guy-finishes-last phenomenon doesn?t last forever. There are definitely many girls who grow out of that train of thought and realize they should be dating the nice guys, not taking them for granted. The tricky part is finding those girls, and even trickier, finding the ones that are single.

So, until those girls are found, I propose a toast to all the nice guys. You know who you are, and I know you?re sick of hearing yourself described as ubiquitously nice. But the truth of the matter is, the world needs your patience in the department store, your holding open of doors, your party escorting services, your propensity to be a sucker for a pretty smile. For all the crazy, inane, absurd things you tolerate, for all the situations where you are the faceless, nameless hero, my accolades, my acknowledgement, and my gratitude go out to you. You do have credibility in this society, and your well deserved vindication is coming.[/size]

[Guest kuroinuyoukai]

When I was younger, I liked bad boys. You know motorcycle roughnecks. The older I get the more I realize that I want a nice guy and since I am a nice girl then that would work out nicely.
I happen to like nice guys, but I don't expect them to do everything that said. Anything a guy would do for me-I would do for them!!And I appreciate anything a guy does for me..not that you asked me that,Corey...

Thank God for making the nice guys in the world!! There's quite a few on here and you know who you are...

Chibihorsewoman-you're not that old girl!!

[sakurasuka]

[SIZE=1]I happen to be going out with one of those super-nice, super-shy guys on Sunday after church, lol.

In the past, I've generally dated guys more one the not-nice spectrum. Most of the time it was just because they were so darn cute...

I would never date any of the guys that I'm currently friends with. Dating friends usually turns out terrible, and you run the risk of losing them as a friend. Too many hearts get broken, and then you don't have anyone to help you out anymore, because he's gone. Yeah... Friends are better. Boyfriends come and go, friends are forever.[/SIZE]

[wayofthreversed]

?No, it would ruin our friendship.? I hate those words with a passion. I have gotten them before and let me tell you ladies you may be trying to let us down easily but that is only topped by "I think of you like a brother". I know I have gotten that one too; I am one of those guys that get the calls or emails or what have you. But I would say that if you girls have a friend like that and you think that you would like to go out with them but do not want to ruin the relationship. Why not risk it if they are good friends why would they not be good boyfriends?

[Shi no Tenshi]

I'm dating a nice guy. He's also my best friend. I usually do those listed things and more to him, but there's a balance and we're pretty happy with it. Gah, besides I'm not the sort to rant about gossip or try things on in the store for hours.

I am guilty of being a flirt and leading guys (and occasionally girls ._.) on. I can't help it, I don't like giving guys the wrong impression, but flirting is healthy and fun. Understandably, there's also a time and place for flirting and I can't figure out when that time is - apart from the obvious like someone's funeral ^^;;

And I agree with sakurasuka - the bad guys are always good looking ;D

[Raquel]

[quote name='wayofthreversed']Why not risk it if they are good friends why would they not be good boyfriends?[/quote]

It's not always that. Sometimes girls arn't looking for a good boyfriend. I, personally, have the habit of dating awful barbarians. I need the good friend in the boy to remind me not everyone is an ***. Sometimes friends are more important than dates. Girls get irritated at their dating intrests for doing some pretty minor things on occasion and I for one would want to spare any good friend of mine the trouble of my love.

[Sandy]

I recognize the type, I'm one. But to my experience, nice guys are usually alone until they're nearing their 30's and then suddenly become attractive to females who have been dissappointed a dozen times by the creeps. That, or they're really gay, like me.

I'm in such a happy position that I ended up with another nice guy, at this moment sitting two feet away from me. ;D We belong together naturally. <3

[2010DigitalBoy]

[COLOR=Purple]*sigh* its an endless cycle. The girls need the nice guy to not be a boyfriend and as a result the nice guy never gets laid, though I guess its holding out like that which makes him the nice guy. I'd like to be the nice guy, though I don't even have someone to be the nice guy to >_<[/COLOR]

[Ezekiel]

[SIZE=1]Actually, Trevor is pretty much most of those things and I'm hopelessly in love with him and he, too, is my best friend. I'd trust him with anything.

But to the point, I do actually get most of what this guy is saying, and reading this brought a smile to my face. I, sadly, don't have any male friends (discounting Trevor) who are nice guys. They're either nice in most ways, but then weird/awful/annoying in others. I appreciate the nice guys, and I'll be damned happy if one ever wants to be my friend and go shopping with me and tell me how I look in my new jeans.

Just one thing I should add, as a woman; "It would ruin our friendship." is actually very true and in most cases, not an excuse. Girls, in most cases I've come across, value friendship above other things.

For an example: One of my previous boyfriends, Joe, was practically my best friend before we decided to go out. We'd both liked each other for a long time but as soon as we really did have a 'relationship', something totally changed. He hated me for at least two months after we broke it off and even now I have an extremely short temper with him and he seems to delight in insulting me at every opportunity. If someone would have told me that before we?d started going out, I would have laughed and told them to shove it. But now I see it?s because of the relationship we had that our friendship was destroyed.

Girls I think tend to think of commitment in a relationship (this is a blanket statement, I know, not all girls are like this. I'm not trying to be sexist or anything) so if their best friend is the nicest guy in the world and they love him as a friend, they're not going to want to take the chance of losing that special person over something stupid in a relationship. I'm sure the guys would feel the same if they thought about it.[/SIZE]

[Solo Tremaine]

[color=#503f86]Actually, although I can identify with a lot of the stuff in the text, and as much as I'd not like to admit it (in terms of how I'm almost always looking and hoping for some sort of relationship), as a guy I think I agree with Imi. If I'm honest with myself, friendship is more important to me than anything else. Of course, if you can remain friends with the person you're going out with it shouldn't be too much of a problem in any case. I think that 'Nice' guys will probably be more likely to maintain friendly contact after a relationship's ended anyway, simply because of who they are. I've never had any trouble, really.

In a weird 'I hate chain e-mails like this' kind of way, it's nice to be appreciated.[/color]

[Retribution]

[size=1]*raises his cup in a toast*

Yeah, man. You pretty much hit me dead on, although I wouldn't really consider myself to be a "nice guy." I like to think of myself as an apathetic cynic who stands aloof from girl's annoying angst and emotional breakdowns when they look perfectly fine. But I'm not really. Heh.

And what you said Imi, is actually psychologically proven... that women [moreso than men by a looooong shot] value committment in a relationship much more than men. So, I guess I can choke down the "It'd ruin our friendship" line if it's actually true.[/size]

[Onix]

[COLOR=SlateGray][SIZE=1]I'll follow Retri's lead and raise my glass to that.

I have a history of being struck down by "Just Friends" Syndrome, and at least three instances immediately spring to mind. In all my years, I've been the perfect gentleman (or at least pretty damn close) when around women who had fallen under my interest, and each time I was brushed off completely, it seems, as [B]just a friend.[/B] Of course, according to a source that was somewhat unreliable and probably just ego-healing in nature, one of those girls eventually turned out to be a lesbian. But that's not the point.

The point is, despite consistently being given a big ol' back-hand by the proverbial hand of fate, I stuck to my ways and eventually hit the jackpot, as it were. I've got Jamie, and I could not be happier.

And besides, I tried the whole bad-boy thing (read: Insufferable Jackass) and that didn't really work either...[/SIZE][/COLOR]

[Gavin]

[SIZE=1]Interesting, most interesting.

God damn that is one accurate little rant, being one of those nice-guys who always finishes last with women has to be the most frustrating sensation there is. I mean I don't know how many girls I've known who piss and moan about the fact that some dumbass rebel they're interested in has let them down and that they want one of those "nice-guy" boyfriends and then just walk off. I mean you're right there, but you know it'd be wrong for you to say anything, let alone wave and big ******* flag and shout that there's one right in front of them.

You'll listen to every little problem, help them with everything you can and do it without any thought of reward, without any ulterior motive. You'll spend an hour or two on the phone reassuring them over any little thing, and you won't care because you care for them and your time doesn't matter. And then you're just kept in the closet and only taken out when you're needed. It's demeaning and it's hurts like hell, but we do it because we're nice-guys and if we didn't do it, then the whole world would go to hell.[/SIZE]

[Her Black Wings]

Three cheers for those sturdy nice guys.

I actually hadn't looked that in-depth to the "Nice Guys" scenario, mostly because I know a guy or two I treat like that, I actually just delivered the "You're like a brother to me," line to one of my guy friends.. and it wasn't a lie. This makes me want to re-examine my relationship with a few of them. Food for thought.

But I agree, those nice guys do deserve a lot of credit. I tend to date the Not-so-nice-guys, and then whine about them for hours to all of my guy friends. Makes me feel bad for them too, that was some pent up frustration right there.

[Annie]

[size=1][color=indigo]I'd like to say something, not purely for the behalf of women. I have seen my girl friends treat the nice guy in such ways explained in that rant. I can't stand it; it's wrong, cruel, and down right heartbreaking for both the nice guy, and me to watch.

But I will say that the door swings both ways every now and then. There are those "nice girls" to the guys. Most of my friends are guys, and I'm usually that girl who consoles and helps the guy with his stupid girlfriend problems. I love the friend to death, and wish that I could show him I can treat him much better, but being the friend, I help him out..and when **** finally does roll down the hill, and he realizes what ingorance he took part in, I'm still considered "a friend only". It sucks, and I know how the nice guy feels.

So, I now raise my cup. May all of us "nice guys" finish last. Trevor has, with the most sweetest gal in these parts. I have with the love of my life, and all my lives past and present, Joe (Parabola). May the rest of you nice guys find your "more than a friend". [/size][/color]

[Starwind]

I think this phenomenon has to do more with an atempt at self destruction. Too many times have I, a nige guy that matches said descritption disturbingly well, seen a girl go for a guy that even I know to be a total dirt bag and against all my willings she would go out with him anyway. Of course it would end poorly and she would run to me, crying how I was right and she should never have done it, only to turn around and do it again a few moths later. It's saddening and maddening at the same time. I can't stand seeing something like that go on and I wish i could plead to them in a way they would understand, but they simply ignore it. I think this however is primarily the teenage audience. I find older or the more mature women are much more clear headed and observant of those around them. They know to avoid the jerks and to take notice of the nice guys. Sadly, this means I will remain without for still a few more years, but til then this nice guy intends to keep up his ways and assist any in need. It is truly a thank less and reward less job, but remember if not for us, there would be far more tragedies in the already abyssmal teenage wasteland we all live in. Til my day comes I wait patiently, offering condolence at any hour, friendly advice without the blatant advances, and friendly escort to un-sightly scenes of great risk. I will live out thsi roll for however long I must and this is simply the fact of my life. I was born and raised to be a nice guy and I intend to be one til I roll into my grave. So I guess it goes without saying that I will always bringing the rear of the race, but as long as I feel like I'm making a difference, then I can be happy with that.

[IceRose]

[quote name='Starwind'] It's saddening and maddening at the same time. I can't stand seeing something like that go on and I wish i could plead to them in a way they would understand, but they simply ignore it. I think this however is primarily the teenage audience. I find older or the more mature women are much more clear headed and observant of those around them. They know to avoid the jerks and to take notice of the nice guys. .[/quote]

Starwind, some young girls like myself know how to identify jerks. Personatly nice guys are the ones that end up with the nice family and with the nice kids and I would not mind finding a guy like that.

[Starwind]

[quote name='IceRose']Starwind, some young girls like myself know how to identify jerks. Personatly nice guys are the ones that end up with the nice family and with the nice kids and I would not mind finding a guy like that.[/quote]

Mind you I did say the more mature audience as well as the older. I know pelnty of girls that know how to avoid the bad ones. But at the same token I see the ones who can't and I simply don't want to disgard them. No matter how it may hurt me or them, in the end I still care about them. I love them like they were my family and I don't want to watch them get hurt like that. Even if I can't prevent there pain, if I can at least help ease it, then I know I have accomplished something. If I get one person to put the blade down, to throw the bottle away, to get off the roof, then I know I've accomplished something. Personally I'm gald to hear you can see the world about you and I won't ahve to worry for yu like I do so many others. Remember to think of the nice guys, even we need love from time to time.

[ChibiHorsewoman]

[color=darkviolet]I like the nice respectful guys who have a tinge of craziness

I wish there were more guys like that. But for some reason there is an over abundance of guys who think women want the hard *** bad boy and strive to be that.

Sorry no.

Now understand that I don't want someone who's too good to be true, because they usually are. But once you reach a certain age *pulls out a wheel chair* YOu realize that you need more when you want to settle down.

And now that I read through this I think that my reply looks like a singles ad... I'm sorry. But hey long live the nice guys. They may finish last some times, but they usually are worth the wait![/color]

[Ikillion]

[quote name='ChibiHorsewoman][color=darkviolet']I like the nice respectful guys who have a tinge of craziness[/color][/quote]

[COLOR=DarkSlateGray][SIZE=2][FONT=Times New Roman]If you wanted to sum myself up in around *counts* twelve words that would be me 150% Execpt I would probaly underline the craziness part of it..Then that would be me 200%

I remember back when I was in the seventh grade and I finally noticed that all the kids who really seemed like they "didnt care for school" or "Are known through out the school from their actions" were always the one getting the grils. Alot of my friends tried to go off and do something like that to get that kind of attention and only ended up making themself look foolish in the end.

I on the other hand really didnt care. I tend to be clueless at times and slightly crazy at more times than others. However I do try my best to atleast act polite in the least. For example if someone was completly new to school and didnt know anything about the school, I would alway be the first to lead a helping hand. If someone needed me for as simple as going to find something they lost wileI had other plans, I would forget it all and go help. Thats the kind of person I am and the standards that I have set for myself.

The one thing that I really tend to hate about always being a 'Nice-Guy' is being used. If I was a brand new tool the day I was born. I would be dented, used, scratched, worn, however else you can say it. I just get picked to be a partner or doing some kind of a group project almost all the time just to be doing it alone in the end. To be though of something that is expendable really makes my insides start to turn, however I just act like it doesnt bother me at all. I think I just have to since that is what a nice-guy is suppose to do?

Blah, let alone the being used ability and always being left behind in almost everything. I personaly love being a nice guy and wouldnt give it up ever.[/FONT][/SIZE][/COLOR]

[Raquel]

In my case, I just don't want to hurt said nice guy. I'm a very violent person. I have a friend whose birthday it is today and he is one of the nice guys. I'd be surprised to find someone better. He's the gallant type too. Opens doors, pulls out chairs.. The works. I'd feel terrible if I clocked this guy because I was in a temper. If I dated this guy and then broke up with him for whatever reason, I'd probably be jealous of any who got him next. And that seriously ruins a friendship.

[dot]

Nice guys are made for Nice girls!

I say, Nice people are very, hard to find.

[Billie_Forever]

Wait..where are all the nice guys around my city then Gosh darn it!!.. :rolleyes: .

Im only joking...i know two..One is a close friend of mine and he is a very lovely person though I'd never go out with him as I've known him for years upon years and he is a year younger than me and my friends are a little peculiar about that...Damn it..it was his birthday yesterday....Must buy him a GREAT present for all the crap he has gotten me through...

I think that he is not just a good guy..but pshysic too...he can just sence when im sad and calls me asking me how my day went (even though we go to the same school..hehe)...hes one of my best friends for life and he doesnt judge me or mind when i call him and cry on the phone..in fact when i hang up by accident he calls me straight back to see if im ok..and he risks getting killed by his family because of the phone bill and sits there talkiing it out and making me feel loads better for 3 hours...He really is one of the most perfect guys i have ever met...

The other went to my primary school and he really is lovely..always making me laugh and making sure im ok....
He walks me home when we have been out for a while and its getting dark..even if it means him having to walk all the way back home in the pitch-black by himself..he really is just that nice...

He can tell when im upset too...and makes sure i talk about it becuase he always says that if i dont..then it will all build up and it will destroy me from the inside...He knows me too well...When i dont speak to him right away on IM then he asks me whats wrong and i have to tell him because he is one of the few people i actully trust...I dont think i would be anything with these two guys...and DAMN IT..its HIS birthday next week...i think January is a good month for the goo guys to be born in...(Note to self...buy presents...)...I would love to go out with this guy..but !) I wouldnt stand a chance...2) I dont think i think of him that way..well i dont think i do..and even if i did what if i lost him..

You see its not some girls faults if they really dont want to ruin a friendship..becuase i know too well...that when something goes wrong and you break up..you can no longer be as close as before...and taking that risk may seem all well and good for some guys but girls are genuinlly scared they will lose the one perfectly desent guy in their lives...and it would really..REALLY..hurt...

Anyhoo...i reckon all the nice guys should come over here...by the sound of it..there are far too many in the U.S.... :catgirl: :animeswea

[Zenriek]

As I was reading this, I was tempted to say, 'They're all either gay or married already!'

But really, they aren't. Because they aren't getting enough attention. A lot of girls fall into the trend of liking the 'bad boys'.

Where's that likely to get you? A thousand dollars in dept to the local gang and/or government.

No, not really. The bad boys are fun.

But so are the good guys. And you can have fun just going to the park. I know that all the good guys aren't taken, 'cause I've got one. And he's always willing to listen, always lends a shoulder, and is an all around good guy. He's great.

I'll always be willing to give a toast for the good guys. :)

[Panache]

Um am I a bad boy or a nice boy. Ok I am always nice to girls,my friends,kids and the elderly. Then I like to do bad stuff like rebel against authority and make my parents worry. So am I bad or good?