Writing Nom's Lyric Library [PG]

[Nomura]

LOL, I copied off of Retri sorta... Well, this a library of my lyrics and poems, and enjoy!

[B]Wonder[/B]

When will we learn?
Defensive acts are still unconcerned
As the problem stands, we take more than we need
We settle ourselves in the pot of greed

Red Horizons, Black smoke
We breathe the air, and then we choke

The problem we can't see
But the answer is thee
The knowledge that we lack
Makes the world crack
Forever lay ourselves
Down to the dirt
And we wonder, yes we wonder
Why we hurt

Stay in your home
Hold your grudge

But you should...you should know

Sorry, our time's end is near
Tomorrow we might not be here

The problem we can't see
But the answer is thee
The knowledge that we lack
Makes the world crack
Forever lay ourselves
Down to the dirt
And we wonder, oh yes we wonder
Why we hurt

It won't go away, away, away
It will just stay, stay, stay

So wonder, yes wonder
Wonder,oh wonder
Wonder! Wonder!

It will go fast, fast, fast
No it won't last, last, last

So wonder away...






Wow, one song already and it's been kinda long! Well, settle yourselves down and get ready for more!

[B]Faded[/B]

My heart stopped beating
But my head is bleeding

I'm falling for the same stuff
Over and Over again
I've had enough
It's time for this to end!

Do you see my pain?
Your wrath?
Your reigne?

It's all too much
I can't take this anymore!
I have no touch
Time to let this go
and shut the door

Screaming
Decieving
All the things you do
If you keep doing this
I'll swear to you

When will this end?
Will it ever begin?
To fade?
If you're hurt
If you're lost
There I am at your aid!

Screaming
Decieving
All the things you do
If you keep doing this
I'll swear to you

What?
Don't you see me?
What?
Staring so much?
What?
But you can't see anything...

My heart stopped beating
But my head is bleeding
Falling for the same stuff over and over again...

Over...And Over...And Over!

Again!

[2010DigitalBoy]

[COLOR=Purple]They're okay, but they're pretty straightforeward and some of the rhymes seem forced. Not bad but keep practicing, kay?[/COLOR]

[Nomura]

I'm not sure what exactly you mean about forced and straightforeward...please explain, Tike. :animeswea

[2010DigitalBoy]

[COLOR=Purple]For the love of god, please do not call me Tike :animeswea

What I mean is some lines seem like you rhymed something that deisn't really fit, you just said it so it would rhyme, like

[I]The problem we can't see
[B]But the answer is thee[/B][/I]

That line totally sounds cheesy and out of place.

By straitforward i mean you said exactly what you meant, which isn't a bad thing, persay, just something to be noted.[/COLOR]

[Nomura]

TIKE, LOL.

Well, perhaps you didn't get the point of that song... The Problem we can't see, But the answer is thee, refers to us being the problem. Trust me, I'm not sloppy enough to just rhyme with any ol' word.

Song Meanings for all you straight bakas: Wonder- Wonder is my newest song, refering to our world and how we live in it. We are greedy, self centered, and disturb innocent people. We also pollute, very much. So, we should just wonder how it's gonna end.

Faded- Bad relationship... You guys should get this one...

[Stark]

Good stuff here, Nomura. No, your rhymes aren't forced, they seem to work perfectly in the way you write. 'The problem we can't see/ But the answer is thee' in particular made me stop and think for a moment. And, I hope you don't mind this, but your lyrics make me think a bit of Switchfoot...

Wonder

It really hits on the greed and materialistic ways I see in society. Nobody seems happy with anything anymore, with all of their expensive toys and fragile clothing. People really should stop and take a look, only to see that the problem itself is within their own minds.

Faded

Such anger and such angst! I've had moments like that, and you're right in this poem. Unfortunately, the same thing will happen over and over again until the chain is broken and the cycle spins out of control. A poet, from what I've noticed, writes with their feelings...well. Find that little bit of control, break the cycle, and ride free on your own set of wheels. No one needs to be chained to that mess.

[Nomura]

Wow, a person who understands completely...You're going on my budd list! Nom's LL, isn't just for my lyrics either. It's a library for all kinds of lyrics, so feel free to post some of yours if ya want.