Writing Shoof [PG]

[Dodeca]

As a forewarning, this will be the fruit of 15 minutes-or-so of mild boredom.

[SIZE=1]"Mr Shoof?"

"Huh?! Wah?!"

It had, needless to say, been a rather long and tedious day. Nevertheless, when one has a name like Mr Glopdiddly Shoof, even simple things, such as being woken from a saliva-rich slumber, can bring a great deal of excitement. Unfortunately, in this case, the slumber had been rich in a great many things.

"Excuse me, are you listening Mr Shoof?"

The reply was slurred and hurried, and roughly resembled Glopdiddly's favourite phrase - "Bleh". In fact, had the listener been particularly attentive, they would have discovered that it was, indeed, "Bleh".

With a slight sigh, the teacher resumed her lesson, fighting the urge to inquire as to why Glopdiddly had withdrawn under his desk with a roll of toilet tissue. Still, after half an hour he had not resurfaced, and not even good sense could prevent Miss Jones from doing her teacher's duty.

"Mr Shoof, are you intending to come up soon, or should I leave your homework on the floor where you can find it?"

"..Umm... No and yes, please."

Not quite the answer she had been hoping for. Shame, that.

"Would you care to explain what you're doing down there?"

"..No. No I wouldn't."

"What if I offered you a free cookie?"

"Umm... that depends..." he replied, raising his head just high enough to peak ove rthe desk edge.

"On what, Mr Shoof?"

"Does it have raisins? Chocolate ones?"

Mrs Jones looked down in dismay at the plain chocolate cookie tottering dangerously on the edge of her desk. Not a raisin to be seen.

"Erm... Yes. Yes, it does."

With that, Glopdiddly shot back out of sight, "bleh"ing as he went.

"Mr Sh-"

"No raisins! No deal!"

"Couldn't you just-"

"No!" [/SIZE]

Such tension! Such suspense! Will Mr Shoof ever get his raisin cookie? And if so, will he reveal the nature of his secretive secrets? Find out in the theoretical next instalment of....

[COLOR=DarkRed][SIZE=3]
[CENTER]SHOOF![/CENTER][/SIZE][/COLOR]

[2010DigitalBoy]

That made me laugh harder than anything all day. Wow, that was one of the randomest things... like... ever.

[quote name='Dodeca']The reply was slurred and hurried, and roughly resembled Glopdiddly's favourite phrase - "Bleh". In fact, had the listener been particularly attentive, they would have discovered that it was, indeed, "Bleh".[/quote]

That had me reeling. I just love how, and this applies to the whole story, it was told like a normal story using excellent narrative skills, and yet it was totally absurd and hilarious.

[quote=Dodeca]With that, Glopdiddly shot back out of sight, "bleh"ing as he went.

"Mr Sh-"

"No raisins! No deal!"

"Couldn't you just-"

"No!"

Such tension! Such suspense! [/quote]

I hadn't yet realised that the last part wasn't with the rest of the story, so as soon as I hit "Such tension! Such suspense!" I was on the ground. Very nice story.