A Very Serious Predicament

[Venge]

I have a question for you all...lets say you have 2 VERY good friends, one of them being your girlfriend. Well, you soon learn that an ex that they both have in common has raped them before. BOTH of them, not just one, but at two different times.

Now, my question is, how would you feel? Would you want revenge? Or would you do something different? Please, post your thoughts on this, cause I SO want to kill the effing bastard.

[2010DigitalBoy]

[COLOR=DarkOrange]At the very least I'd beat the **** out of him. Honestly, that's unforgivable. I know there may be a more logical way of handling things, but I'd hate to think someone like that gets punished before getting beat up. Try for both. [/COLOR]

[Albert Flasher]

[COLOR=Sienna]How big is this guy? I mean, if you ran into him in a dark ally, could you take him? 'Cause it doesn't make a whole lot of sense to go running in and playing the hero against a guy who'll KO you in one punch, now would it?

Either way, if this guy raped two women, maybe more, then the best option is to report him to someone who can handle the situation a lot better then you can. I don't know the whole situation (I mean, was it a violent, dark-ally kind of rape or a 'no-means-no' kind of rape?) but in general when this kind of thing goes down that's the best option. Usually going in all gung-ho guns-a-blazin just makes the situation worse. [/COLOR]

[shadowmovement]

[QUOTE=HedonismBot][COLOR=Sienna]How big is this guy? I mean, if you ran into him in a dark ally, could you take him? 'Cause it doesn't make a whole lot of sense to go running in and playing the hero against a guy who'll KO you in one punch, now would it?

Either way, if this guy raped two women, maybe more, then the best option is to report him to someone who can handle the situation a lot better then you can. I don't know the whole situation (I mean, was it a violent, dark-ally kind of rape or a 'no-means-no' kind of rape?) but in general when this kind of thing goes down that's the best option. Usually going in all gung-ho guns-a-blazin just makes the situation worse. [/COLOR][/QUOTE]

I agree I think that you should report him. It would be the best and safest option.

[Allamorph]

[FONT=Arial]I can honestly say that my soul would be [I]screaming[/I] for blood in that situation, not only because I cared for both of those people, but also because he had [I]blatantly[/I] violated one of the most important codes ingrained in my head and the heads of all other Men I know. A guy [U]respects[/U] a woman. Period. No options, no clauses, no buts, no.

Yeah. The heck with just killing him. I'd want his head on a silver charger, but only after I'd made sure he'd suffered equitable agony.

In all practicality, though, blowing the whistle on him is the 'right' way to go. It may not satisfy your honor or your (justified) need for blood vengeance, but it's what should happen. His whole image will be irreparably crushed in the process, so it's kind of almost a decent trade-off.

Dreaming of all the nastie things you could do to him is fine in the meantime. :devil: [/FONT]

[Sojiro47]

In this instance, I don't care how big the idiot is. Peope have messed with me enough that even if they weren't my best friends, I'd still beat the everloving crap out of him. No joke. Jerks like that deserve to feel their own wrath. That's why I'ma vigilante, but unfortunatly, it's illigal. Too bad, because that jerk would wake up in the hospital in the ICU. Untill the real law steps in, just theaten him, and if he does it again...USe your judgement.

[Raina]

[COLOR=Blue]I had a similar thing happen. My best friend in high school was raped 3 times by 3 different people, at different occasions, during high school. I couldn't do anything about it, because these were gangster related incidents. I wanted to kill all 3 of them, but that would put everyone around me in great danger. Not only that, I'm only 153cm tall (sorry, I don't know in feet or inches...). And I'm not that strong. So what I did was listen to my best friend when she wanted to talk about it, and not say anything when she didn't want to talk about it. It was a really hard thing to do, so I understand why you want to go and get revenge. But I think that you should talk to your friends more, and get the whole story. If they don't want you to go and get revenge, then you shouldn't. If they want you to go with them to the authorities, then you should. Just don't do anything that you might regret later on.[/COLOR]

[Sandy]

I don't know what medieval age you think you live in, but taking justice into your own hands is every bit as punishable as commiting a crime.

The girls should obviously go to the police and make the rapist pay for what he did to them. It's not going to be easy, the process can be very humiliating for the victims, but the other option is to let the offender live on the loose and possibly repeat his crime again. :/

[Horendithas]

[COLOR=DarkRed][QUOTE=Venge]I have a question for you all...lets say you have 2 VERY good friends, one of them being your girlfriend. Well, you soon learn that an ex that they both have in common has raped them before. BOTH of them, not just one, but at two different times.

Now, my question is, how would you feel? Would you want revenge? Or would you do something different? Please, post your thoughts on this, cause I SO want to kill the effing bastard.[/QUOTE]How would I feel? I don?t know someone close to me, but I work as a volunteer at a women?s crisis center and I deal with domestic violence victims all the time, including rape. It?s a sad, sick, disgusting world where others will do such harmful things to another human being. Would I want revenge? Sometimes I wish I could, but in the end I do not. The best thing to do is to not only be there for your friends should they need a shoulder to cry on, but to also support them in prosecuting the person responsible.

The very best revenge you can get is to either get them put in jail and thus forever labeled as a sex offender to make it easier for anyone else who is attacked by them.

The very worst thing you can do is try to take matters into your own hands. The person has already shown that they have no issue with doing what they want and if you get in the way, you could get hurt. [quote name='Sojiro47']In this instance, I don't care how big the idiot is. Peope have messed with me enough that even if they weren't my best friends, I'd still beat the everloving crap out of him. No joke. Jerks like that deserve to feel their own wrath. That's why I'ma vigilante, but unfortunatly, it's illigal. Too bad, because that jerk would wake up in the hospital in the ICU. Untill the real law steps in, just theaten him, and if he does it again...USe your judgement.[/quote]You should, because no matter how much you think your rage will let you be able to stop them, unless you are willing to do some serious harm that would get you in trouble, I can guarantee that all he will do is beat the heck out of you. And even if you are willing to seriously harm them, they may still be too much for you to take on. And in the end you will go to jail for assault and that jerk will still be out and able to do what he wants to another victim.

Unless this person is bothering the girls, threatening them is also a mistake and extremely foolish. You could escalate it into an even worse situation than they were already dealing with. By all means if he?s after them again, then I?m not saying you should sit still and do nothing, but if that?s not the case and he?s just a jackass who thinks he got away with it. Following a legal course is the best way to really put the hurt on them. Because often these scum think they are above the law and that no one can touch them. And being put in jail only to become someone else's ***** is quite the wake up call.[/COLOR]

[Guest Phaedrus]

Much pain exists within this world. However, retribution in the face of pain only leads to more pain. Pain dished out for pain only leads to more pain, in an endless viscious cycle.

Traumatic experiences, when survived, exist in this world so that we may learn something. Something about ourselves, something about others. Pain exists so that we can come to terms with it, and realize the things which are good to a greater extent.

Going and beating someone up will get you nowhere. . .If anything, let the law handle it if it's retribution you seek.

And the best thing? Influence these lady's lives in a positive manner, and allow them to grow more because of the terrible things which happened to them. One day, I expect them to be quite strong people due to their ability to grow from something so terrible. That's retribution if anything.

[Rachmaninoff]

[quote name='Phaedrus']And the best thing? Influence these lady's lives in a positive manner, and allow them to grow more because of the terrible things which happened to them. One day, I expect them to be quite strong people due to their ability to grow from something so terrible. That's retribution if anything.[/quote]Ah yes, that?s exactly what you should do. The most important thing here is the ladies. Whether or not the scumbag who attacked them is brought to justice or beaten for his crimes is irrelevant. In the end it is the ladies who really matter.

Don?t be a fool and rush off to take vengeance, stand behind them and support them based on what they wish to do, whether it?s to move on with their lives or to prosecute the jackass. Don?t drag them down by being no better than the one who attacked them, it may seem macho and cool but unless you are defending from an actual attack in progress, it?s foolhardy and dangerous.

Oh and if the lady in question wants vengeance, try to get her some help so she can move on and not let such a jerk rule her life in that respect. I can understand the feeling on some level as someone I care for had something really bad happen to her. She wasn?t raped, it was something else, but it was still horrible and I wanted to kill the person who put her through it. But I didn't I just did my best to be there for her. Phaedrus is right, in the end she became a much stronger person because of it.

[Roxie Faye]

[color=#9933ff]While getting revenge may be satisfying, it isn't the best way to go, as everyone else has said.

Please, [b]please[/b] report what this scumbag did to the authorities. To someone at school, to the police, anyone. It is not okay for him to get away with it.Nobody, nobody has the right to touch anyone else without their permission.

The other important thing is to be there for both these ladies. They should be re-assured that nothing is their fault, and any of your anger is (obviously) not directed at them. Once again, it's important to inform the authorities of this. The girls may need counseling to get through this, and that's important for them, too. [/color]

[DeadSeraphim]

[size=1][color=indigo][font=arial]Reporting to the authorities doesn't matter if the girls won't talk about it to the authorities, and as [i]they[/i] haven't already, you'd be in for a tough time convincing the police he's a rapist. "My female friends said he'd raped them!" "That's great kid, but we need [i]their[/i] testimony." Encourage them to pursue charges, but just be there for them and don't make a huge thing of it in the meantime. [/font][/color][/size]

[Aaryanna_Mom]

I?m glad to see that so many people are giving out good advice. The very last thing you want to do is to become a vigilante. Nor do you want to push them to pursue legal action if they don?t feel up to it. And by no means does it mean anything if they choose to not do anything.

Don?t make a big deal out of it. Be as supportive of them as you can regardless of the decision they make. Also if you think being raped is bad, it?s even worse to have others accuse of you somehow bringing it on yourself or of being a coward for not pursuing legal action. Something I?ve seen others do and it just makes me sad to see it.

To often people judge the victim because they can?t get the person who hurt them. Always remember that the[I] true [/I]coward is the person who assaulted them. Take that anger you feel and use it to support them to the best of your ability.

[G/S/B Master]

[QUOTE=Allamorph][FONT=Arial]
Dreaming of all the nastie things you could do to him is fine in the meantime. :devil: [/FONT][/QUOTE]

A thought leads to an action.

If I were you, I would slap myself on the forehead. the LEAST the girls can do to report to the authorities. Have the girls report it to the authorities IMMEDIATELY before the guy escapes. If this happened a long time ago, then might as well quit, the sooner you take action, the less effective it'll be.

And if the guy raped 2 girls, I doubt you could beat him into a pulp. Unless you're Sylvester Stallone.

[ChibiHorsewoman]

[color=#9933ff][font=lucida calligraphy]Going with my gut instinct I'd want to rip the guys manhood off and staple it to his forehead, but for once in my life I'm going to be logical and rational and suggest that you report the guy before the statue (SP?) of limitations runs out so he can face some form of justice. Who knows who else he's done this to because in my mind rapists are like child molesters (Yes, they should also be chopped up and fed to lions- there was a Roman Emperor who did that back in the BCE- I forgot who) they don't just stop at one or two victims, they keep going to see how long and how far they can go before getting caught.

That said, I also think that your girlfriend and her friend should be tested for STDs (or STIs if you call them infections instead of diseases) because I really doubt that the schmuck bothered to use any form of protection before he violated those girls. If he, did you may have another round of problems because I heard of somewhere where a judge decided that the rape wasn't a rape because the victim had asked her attacker to wear a condom. Stupid yes, but the law is dumb.

I think the best you can do aside from going to the authorities is to offer moral support- especially because heresay and speculation doesn't hold up in court and you need solid evidence. Hopefully with enough reassurance you can convince them to tell their story. I can't imagine how bad it really is, but I have done enough research to understand that the stigma still exists that the woman was asking for it. Good luck[/color][/font]