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The evisceration of your name


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[FONT=Tahoma]I've known countless people and have countless friends currently who just have easy-to-screw up names for those who have nothing but a list to go by when needing to say your name, or nothing but word of mouth to go by to spell your name (the geniuses that prefer to believe they know how to spell everything rather then ask). This includes attendence lists for school, job applications, surveys, etc etc. I do not believe my name falls into such a category...it's simply Matt, and in it's extended form Matthew. Neither of which however i think are difficult to pronounce OR spell.

However in a recent response to job application with the CUNY system here in New York, it seems someone misread my name and decided to write [i]"Dear Mutt"[/i] rather than Matt. I corrected this through reponse and then received a call days later, the woman asking if she was speaking with "Mutt"...so either they truly like Mutt better or my name is just that difficult for some people deal with.

Makes me wonder if CUNY is slipping a bit in their standards for hiring, luckily one person doesn't count as an ample representation of a city-wide company.

But in any case, while my example just seems plain silly...feel free to share either your or a friend's silly or understandable name eviscerations in your past. Either pronounced terribly wrong or spelled terribly wrong.
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[COLOR=DarkOrange]Oh dear, sweet lord. Firstly, my name happens to be [B]Conrad[/B]. (in fact, for those who hat typing my whole name, I don't mind if you call me this, or DB as some have come to do). I have two brothers with the names [B]Shade [/B] and [B]Victor[/B].

I am not Russian. no, it's not 'that thing like in the military.' NO my dad is NOT a soldier. No, not Comrade. NOT Comrat. No, C-o-n-r-a-d, curse you! What's that? You say that you always thought it was 'Comrade' until you saw it on paper while you were handing back quizzes? Well, that makes you ignorant. Yes, i've corrected you five times now. Please refrain from screwing it up again!!!

Oh, and you are NOT the first one to come up with the nickname Cornbread, and I am WELL aware that my name backwards is the strangely humerous 'Darnoc.' No. I should NOT change my name to Darnoc!!!

Sorry about that. I've been to 12 different schools - every time getting every last drop of the above paragraphs. And dear god, don't get me started on Shade. It's always Shane, or on roll sometimes 'sha-day'. It doesn't help that he looks like a girl to most people so they don't get it when you correct them. I have had friends who go on mispronouncing his name for months.

Victor has less problems except that his name is not particularly common, much like mine (though his isn't subject to sounding like another word). For some reason, every music or art teacher he's ever had has mistakenly called him 'Vincent'.[/COLOR]
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[COLOR=Blue]In the humble words of CHarlie Brown: AUGHHHH!!![/COLOR]

[COLOR=DimGray]I hate my name. It's Richard but my friends call me Ricky or Rick. But some things are better left unsaid people... better left unsaid.

My english teacher calls me Ricko. When she wrote my name on the seating chart she put the first letter of my last name too close to the 'K' in Rick. (First year to use it by the way) Now in her class when I'm in trouble she'll yell Ricko...[/COLOR]

[B]RICKO!![/B]

[COLOR=Blue]Sorry for the rant... but you know what I mean don't yall? But thankfully people just call me Hero or as DB calls me[B] F-H[/B] her on the OB. Thank god for user name's.[/COLOR]
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[color=crimson]My name is Kenneth and that is very rarely screwed up. Sometimes someone will miss an 'n' or something but nothing major. Nicknames of Ken and Kenny are alright, the latter I'm not too fond of since I've been called that since I was a kid and I feel like I've grown out of it.

Common annoyances with my name.. well, there was always "Ken and Barbie!" followed by giggles. Then when South Park got really popular, snap, life sucked for a couple of years.

I use Ken online so most people around here call me that.[/color]
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My name seems to be hard for people to not only spell but to say as well. My name is Kirstin. It took one of my teachers 3 years to say it right and now he working on the spelling. Only one person has ever gotten it right in saying and spelling. That person was my creative writing teacher/english teacher. My school is small so you get basicly the same teachers every year only teaching different stuff.

I personal hate it when my name is spelled or said wrong. I mean I have had a doctor go so far as Christian and spelling it that way. I think thats a little off. The most common mistake in writing my name is Kirsten or Kristen or Kristin. I get really sick of it some times.
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[QUOTE=DeathKnight][color=crimson]Then when South Park got really popular, snap, life sucked for a couple of years.
[/color][/QUOTE]

[font=tahoma]Friend of mine had that problem as well since his name is Kenny (and still has because we refuse to let it die since he hates it). Another friend of mine has it worse though with "Kyle". We like acting like cartman to him and it annoys the hell out of him. Not nearly as bad as the George Carlin bit on names though, when he mentioned Kyle as being a soft boy's name :P. Those who know the act will know what i'm talking about, hehe.[/font]
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[COLOR=DarkOrange][FONT=Trebuchet MS]My name is Alexa, no longer form of Alexandra, just Alexa. It seems all very well and good, because it's a simple name. Not that common, but it's simple and I've always figured it was rather easy. And apparently alot of people in this thread have simple names who also get them 'effed' up on a regular basis xD

I've heard it all, including a teacher calling me Alexandra. I'm not sure where she thought the 'ndra' came from... I've been called both Alexia and Alexis many times. My least favourite nickname is probably Lex.. I do however sometimes refer to myself as Lexbot xD My grandma and my auntie call me Lexy, but I can't stand the name otherwise and my friends know it.

I think it's most annoying when people put the wrong emphasis in the wrong places so it sounds like "AHlecksAH?" That's just [I]gross[/I] sounding.[/FONT][/COLOR]
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[QUOTE=ForgotteÑ-HerÖ][COLOR=Blue]In the humble words of CHarlie Brown: AUGHHHH!!![/COLOR]

[COLOR=DimGray]I hate my name. It's Richard but my friends call me Ricky or Rick. But some things are better left unsaid people... better left unsaid.

My english teacher calls me Ricko. When she wrote my name on the seating chart she put the first letter of my last name too close to the 'K' in Rick. (First year to use it by the way) Now in her class when I'm in trouble she'll yell Ricko...[/COLOR]

[B]RICKO!![/B]

[COLOR=Blue]Sorry for the rant... but you know what I mean don't yall? But thankfully people just call me Hero or as DB calls me[B] F-H[/B] her on the OB. Thank god for user name's.[/COLOR][/QUOTE]

[SIZE=1]Thats my dad's name. Telemarketers and other random companies used to call the house and ask for Rick. He used to get really annoyed. This doesn't happen so much anymore.

People don't have trouble with my name, its my last name that get em'.

L - o - c - k - e - r. Yes, like a [I]locker[/i]. I get people misunderstanding me and saying Walker. Or they can't spell it. It gets on my nerves sometimes.

I had a teacher in 7th grade ask if I had a cousin named Jim. I didn't understand what he men't at first, lol.[/SIZE]
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[QUOTE=2007DigitalBoy][COLOR=DarkOrange]Oh dear, sweet lord. Firstly, my name happens to be [B]Conrad[/B]. (in fact, for those who hat typing my whole name, I don't mind if you call me this, or DB as some have come to do). I have two brothers with the names [B]Shade [/B] and [B]Victor[/B].

I am not Russian. no, it's not 'that thing like in the military.' NO my dad is NOT a soldier. No, not Comrade. NOT Comrat. No, C-o-n-r-a-d, curse you! What's that? You say that you always thought it was 'Comrade' until you saw it on paper while you were handing back quizzes? Well, that makes you ignorant. Yes, i've corrected you five times now. Please refrain from screwing it up again!!!

Oh, and you are NOT the first one to come up with the nickname Cornbread, and I am WELL aware that my name backwards is the strangely humerous 'Darnoc.' No. I should NOT change my name to Darnoc!!!

Sorry about that. I've been to 12 different schools - every time getting every last drop of the above paragraphs. And dear god, don't get me started on Shade. It's always Shane, or on roll sometimes 'sha-day'. It doesn't help that he looks like a girl to most people so they don't get it when you correct them. I have had friends who go on mispronouncing his name for months.

Victor has less problems except that his name is not particularly common, much like mine (though his isn't subject to sounding like another word). For some reason, every music or art teacher he's ever had has mistakenly called him 'Vincent'.[/COLOR][/QUOTE]
[size=1][color=indigo][font=arial]T...Tical? Is that you? Oh God, it's been so long! :')[/font][/color][/size]
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[SIZE=1]Yeah, nobody's stupid enough to mix up my first name either, though I've had people get completely confused as they're trying to get my surname right, which in turn makes me get ticked off with them for getting it wrong after I've repeated it 5-odd times.

[I]"Surname please."
[COLOR=DimGray]"Lucking."[/COLOR]
"Lockett?"
[COLOR=DimGray]"No, Lucking, Lu-"[/COLOR]
"Lockley?"
[COLOR=DimGray]"No, no. Listen. Luck. Ing."[/COLOR]
"Ohh, I see."
*starts writing m'name doon*
[COLOR=DimGray]"Got it now?"[/COLOR]
"I think so... Locking, was it?"
[COLOR=DimGray]"Oh for G-...Here, I'll write it down for you."[/COLOR]
"No, no, I can manage. L... o...-"
[COLOR=DimGray]"U."[/COLOR]
"Excuse me?"
[COLOR=DimGray]"It's L-u. L-[b]U[/b]."[/COLOR]
"Oh, I'm ever so sorry. Oh, erm... What was the rest of it again?"[/I]

Naturally, it's made even more infuriating if you're trying to give your name over a fuzzy phone line. >.<[/SIZE]
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[COLOR=Magenta]My last name is not very hard to say 'cause all the letters are used and none are silent but many many people screw it up. Either they have a problem or they just can't read.

I have sister and many people screw up her name. It's Ashleigh and many spell it this way A-s-h-l-e-y.

I have a friend that has the prettiest name but it screwed up a lot. Her name is Linnea (Li-na-a). Doesn't look so hard to say but people often call her Lin-e-a. Long on the e. or Leanne. It is a hard name but I got right on the dot.[/COLOR]
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[COLOR=RoyalBlue][FONT=Comic Sans MS]Haha well apparently "Bond" is a hard last name to spell. People usually say "Vond" or "baun". Even though I pronounce it fine. They usually get it right once I say "Like James" or "007" That gets it. Also...my first name is Shannon. And whereas there's usually no spelling errors for it...I am a guy. So you can imagine when someone reads my name, they naturally assume I'm a girl. I've had a few substitute teachers who didn't believe when I said "Nope, that's me." or "Hard to believe I'm NOT a girl, huh?". It usually takes another kid or two to support evidence that I'm telling the truth. It's a pain. For example, the other day I wrote a letter to some technical assistance guy talking to him about stuff for the television set and how to improve video quality while still using coaxial cords. Anyways, he kept repsponding with "Dear Ms. Bond" Which of course, I corrected in every reply message, yet he still kept referring to me as "Ms" rather that "Mr". I'm used to stuff like this...I get teased about the name everyday, but it doesn't bug me. It's actually rather funny.[/FONT][/COLOR]
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[COLOR=royalblue][font=times]Oh the places I've gone..

"Name?"
"D'Ann."
"That's D-A-n-n-e?"
"No. D, Apostrophe, Capital A, N, N."
"So it's pronounced Dawn?"
"Dee-ANN!"

Chinese people get my name easier I swear. They inflect the D heavily and the rest is just snapped out. I've even received packages that were meant apparently to go to Dawn, Danae, and Denice.

"Last name?"
"Hirsch!"

If you bark it, they usually get it faster. Roll the R for proper German pronunciation.[/font][/COLOR]
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My first name, Gail, doesn't seem like it would be an issue but it somehow gets people confused. It gets spelled incorrectly all the time. I get Gayle or Gale mostly...except for the time some thought it was Heidi. I'm really not sure where the heck that came from.

My maiden name is Shimura. She-Moo-rah. I get Sam-Mir-ah quite a bit. Oh well.

My married name causes my husband more grief than it does for me. Brightbill. You pronounce it like it is spelled. Simple enough. He gets called Bill all the time or Mr. Bright. Mr. Bill Bright. Annoying. Or we get variation on it like Brightville, Rightbill, Rightville, Vrightville... oh the list goes on and on. I think the worst mix up came from a hospital that gave my hubby the prescription for a William Bright instead of his. He caught it before he left the counter... but still! His first name is John not Bill!
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[FONT=Arial][size=1]

Long time no see.

Well, my first name is JayCee. The 'C' is meant to be capitalized.

What's your name?
JayCee.
Oh, J.C., what does it stand for?
Nothing. It's JayCee.
Wha...?
J-A-Y-C-E-E.

My middle name is Marie, so that rarely gets misspelled. But my last name is Wasnich-Plont. Two last names really, but that hardly matters.

Wasnich is pronounced with a 'k' sound on the end, not a 'ch' sound, so it's often spelled Wasnick or Wasnik. But Plont is the worst. I often get letters addressed to Ms Plant, Plonk, Plaut, Plot, Plan, Pot, Pont, Pant, etc. I'm not sure anyone has ever spelled my full name correctly without help.

But I don't blame them, I blame the horrible people who gave me this curse of a name.

[/size][/FONT]
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[size=1]Boris. People never really prenounce it wrong, though often I have to repeat my name at least once for the other to recognize it. Eh... Every once in a while someone finds out that "Boris" rhymes with "clitoris", but it's so unoriginal that they don't use it more than once.

The name people seem to have trouble with is my last name. It's the Dutch word for "writer": Schrijver. Somehow people always understand it wrong and think I said "Schrever", WHICH ISN'T EVEN A WORD. The stupid thing is, after it happened once I always say the "ij" part extra obvious.

That's about it... Well, as far as things go that people from outside the Netherlands would be able to understand.[/size]
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[COLOR=DarkSlateBlue][SIZE=1][FONT=Tahoma]Yes, it has been awhile, sakurasuka.

You all have such wonderful names. =]

Anyway, since my name comes from the Filipino and Hawaiian language, most people in the US and here in the UK have a ultimately hard time pronouncing my whole name... and it's not even that difficult, really.

My first name is Tiana, which is the Filipino part. You can imagine how many [I]other[/I] different names people come up for me.

[B]Yo. What's your name?
Tiana.
Oh, okay. Hey, Ta-Tiana.
Umm, no. There's no Ta before Tiana... just... Tiana.
What? Taina, then?
No. The I is before the A. Ti. A. Na.
Uh... Tania?
No! Tiana! TEE- AH- NA!! T-I-A-N-A!! TIANA!!![/B]

You can imagine how annoying it is to have your English teacher pronounce your name wrong everyday, even with me AND my English class reminding her. She still hasn't gotten it yet. -_-

My middle name is the hardest for anyone to pronounce because it's Hawaiian. My middle name is Kawailehua, which means, "The radiant flower in the rain" or something like that. The W is pronounced like a V in the Hawaiian language, so it's more like Kavai. When I was young, I learned how to spell my name by thinking of Kawaii, so... yup.

A normal conversation with my friends about my middle name.

[B]Hey, Tiana. What's your middle name again?
Ahahaha, it's K-
Wait! I remember it, just let me try to say it.
Lol, okay.
It's Ka...Kalehua.
Nope.
Keleiha?
Nah.
Kawelhu?
Not even close.
Fine then! What the crap is it?!
Kawailehua. K-a-w-a-i-l-e-h-u-a. The W is pronounced like a V, remember?
I knew that.[/B]

Then, my first last name is Talbert, which is my mom's side of the family's name. It's special to me, so my parents let me keep it.

No one usually gets it wrong, unless they say Tallbert or something really unique.

And finally, my last last name (lol) is Lovett, which is my step dad's side of the family. He adopted me and my sister, so we got his last name. I really love it because, well... it's Lovett! A lot of people like to make fun of me and saying that I Loveit! or something.

Well... my whole name is: Tiana Kawailehua Talbert Lovett. I love it because it's so unique and has different languages in each name.

That name's going on my High School Diploma when I graduate soon... I can imagine it taking up all the free space and our announcer pronouncing it wrong, lol.[/FONT]
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[SIZE=1]Gavin.

I really can't understand why such a simple name gets screwed up so often. Think of any name beginning with G and chances are I've been called it, not helped by the fact my middle name is Gerard after my dad, so I get called Gerry or Gary on ocassion too.

A recent name screw-up came with our substitute Chemistry teacher, Mr. Herbert, as is standard practice he asked for people's names at the start of class. He got to me fourth and that's when trouble began.

"[B]Name[/B]"

"[B]Gavin[/B]"

"[B]Kevin ?"[/B]

"[B]No. Gavin.[/B]"

"[B]Calvin ?[/B]"

"[B]GA-vin[/B]"

"[B]Sorry ?[/B]"

"[B]G.A.V.I.N.[/B]"

"[B]Are you making this up ?[/B]"

"[B]...[/b]" *Shakes head*
[/SIZE]
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[color=crimson]Gavin reminded me, one problem I get is what I call the "K name syndrome" where I say my name and people interpret it as a wide range of other K-names before deciding I said "Kenneth". I'm not sure if my name is that flexible or if people need to get their hearing checked.

Keith and Kevin are the foremost offenders.[/color]
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My first name, Jordan, is easy enough to get. If people aren't sure, I simply reference the country, or the river, or the basketball player. This always invites some lame as joke (i usually make it) such as , "You know, like Michael Jordan, my parents named me this because I look like him". [I don't *points to avatar*]

My last name is gloriously sweet: Fett.
That's right, like Boba or Jango. I'm of the line of bounty hunters. Which is funny, because when I first watched Return of the Jedi (I was 6) I mistook Leia's bounty hunter as Boba Fett. For the longest time I had a crush on Leia, thinking we were secretly related... which, in retrospect, would have been paradoxically unfortunate.

People have trouble with Fett, for some reason (I love correcting them by pointing out it's just like the Bounty Hunter). Some pronounce it "Fat", which resulted to lots of **** in 2nd grade. But when people matured into the 3rd and 4th grade the insult lost its novelty.

The real problem is when I write it down. I like to cross the two t's with a single line. Some people mis-read this as "Felt". Including my Highschool... freshman year it was "Jordan Felt" who got the lead in the musical or was on the honor roll (*plug*!). I managed to fix early enough so that it didn't interfere with any official transcripts or documents. Although, I occasionally get the fun spam letter for 'Mr. Felt'. If someone reads off my last name incorrectly I usually reply with , "Jordan [i]felt[/i] sad when someone miss-pronounced his name."
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[SIZE=1]I think I'm going to change my second name to Goat. And I'm not joking (it'd fit the nickname, which so far comes from nowhere, really).

My last name, Sherratt, is a bastard. I could use Gorski but I never do after the horrors of my last name. For one, everyone spells it wrong (Sherrat, Sherat, Sherbert once, which I did actually shout 'what the feck' to). And if they're not spelling it wrong, they're saying it wrong. I have to repeat myself at least five times, then in the end I give them the spelling, yet they STILL spell it wrong! Being stubborn I normally tell them to change it, then they'll go "Ah, Sherratt" and say it wrong AGAIN.

It's not that hard.

Vicky is even worse which is why I insist on my nickname in real life. Yes, I know it rhymes with Sticky, and no, Sticky Vicky really ain't funny. I also hate the alternative spellings. Vikki, Vicki, Vickie... I'm sure you can spell it more ways than that.

I once had someone call me Ricky in school. We're not going to even get into what happened next =)

I actually became pretty sick of my name, you can make so many crap rhymes with it and it really just annoys me. If people didn't know me as Vicky here, I'd have alright changed my name on OB as well.[/size]
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[quote name='2007DigitalBoy][COLOR=DarkOrange']I can't help but wonder how you of all people are the first one to say anything O_o[/COLOR][/quote]
[font=arial][size=1]I was actually the one who brought it up to him, haha. Same music taste? Same name? It had to be.

You really grew up. :p

And yeah. I'm Kevin. I haven't really had any problems with it. My last name is McCarty, NOT McCart[u]h[/u]y of McCar[u]d[/u]y. One of my teachers, a Mr. Talley, once roll called me as Kevin MacArthur, so I said "McCarty, Talleywhacker" and he called it even.[/font][/size]
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[quote name='2007DigitalBoy][COLOR=DarkOrange']I can't help but wonder how you of all people are the first one to say anything O_o[/COLOR][/quote]

[COLOR=Blue][B]Huh? Now you've completely stumped me! Who are you again?[/B][/COLOR]

[COLOR=DimGray]So what? Is DB actually Tical!! If he is WOW! O_o!

All this time... Weell I should have seen this coming the way he talks in his posts. [/COLOR]
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[QUOTE=ForgotteÑ-HerÖ][COLOR=Blue][B]Huh? Now you've completely stumped me! Who are you again?[/B][/COLOR]

[COLOR=DimGray]So what? Is DB actually Tical!! If he is WOW! O_o!

All this time... Weell I should have seen this coming the way he talks in his posts. [/COLOR][/QUOTE]

[COLOR=DarkOrange]OMG come on! I'm the only person who ever critiqued your work1 I was the guy who insulted you horribly then apologized and then you became, like, my pupil or something because you really liked my porn story! You don't remember any of that?!

In any event, yes, considering that I post in the same threads, talk about the same stuff, and my profile was created the same day as my last post on the old title, it was not like i was hiding it. Besides, the same IP -- the mods knew anyway. (i assume?!) By the way, Rifles, how in gods name did you remember my name?!

And no, I have obviously not grown up since the exact same people hate me for the exact same reasons, lol. The only difference is I don't spam lesbian pornography and my posts are longer, heh.

And while on the subject, [B]Tical [/B] itself is apparently a hard name to figure out. I actually had the nickname 'tickle' on another board because people thought that was how it was pronounced. (it's ty-call, for those still confused). But I dropped that title prmanently, which is why I even made this account in the first place...

EDIT: Adding on to all that, it must have at least been obvious that whoever this was, it was not their first account, since I frequently refer to a time before OB went dead -- a time long before this account was created. I've been here almost 4 years after all >_< Not to mention I'm the only person I can think of who's name so frequently is on the front page like 6 times at any given part of the day... [/COLOR]
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