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Away Messages


Roxie Faye
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[color=#9933ff]What are some of the best away messages you've seen, or used? Post them here! If there's any backstory or inside joke to them, let us know.

Also, do you use your away messages for things other than away messaging? Do you abuse your away messaging/ use it a lot?


For me, sometimes I'll put my away message up if someone's on that I don't want to talk to; but usually I just put myself on "invisible." ^^; I like to use my away messages, though, to send obscure messages to people, or to post inside jokes. I guess, because I check everyone's away message (just to see what it says), I assume people do the same, and so I post up stuff to laugh at, or make them remember a particular time.

Some of my better away messages:

[size=1]"Greetings and salutations my punctilious friend! It appears that I've quitted this all to progressive mode of communication for the moment. Do leave your calling card with the butler and I will be sure to make amends for missing your friendly overtures within the near future."

[/size]This one, I stole from my sister, who used to have it as her away message. People usually have something to say about it, the first time they see it. ;_;''

[size=1]"if your name isn't blacksword2288 don't bother IMing me, dammit."

[/size]Translation: "I'm ignoring everyone but Lumi and if you IM me, I'll be very pissed off and you will know the meaning of 'Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned'"

[size=1]"It's econ - that's like math, right?" - Me
"Just make sure that, if you're going to have children, you take drugs." - Ms. -
"I used to be a person..." - Matt
"I have a bad feeling about this." - Like every character in Star Wars (Little AP)
"I hate my life." - Me
"If I had to name (what the hell should I say?) one subject..." - Rachel"

[/size]Academic Decathlon! Wooo!!!! During one of our in school study sessions, we kept writing funny quotes on the board throughout the day. They were quotes that people said in the moment, that day. *giggle*

[size=1]"This girl was wearing a cloak!!"
"...Rachel... you own a cloak."
"But I don't wear it!!!"[/size]
Another Acadec study day. We somehow got on the topic of people from Connecticut, like this girl Rachel saw one time, who was not only gothic, but slithering around in a cloak. ;)


And do us all a favor, and don't pretend like you don't have cool away messages. Because I know that, in fact, you actually do. :p [/color]
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[COLOR=DarkOrange]I remember having personalized my away messages very meticulously in the past, but I have never used IM remotely frequently, so it's hard for me to remember any of them at all. I probably had some song lyrics in there from time to time or just silly inside-jokes and wisecracks. Who knows.

I'd like one that simply says:

"[B]yo[/B]"

so they try to talk to me and it looks like I'm there XD[/COLOR]
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Inspired by an episode of Spoungebob a few years back(give or take a few words):

[COLOR=DarkRed]I went away to a magical place, where the birds sing as they wait my arrival. A place pure and white as the last drop of snowflake being gently placed on the peak of the tallest mountain of vast beauty. A magical wonderland of the mind and spirit. Beautiful like the circle of life as which we are all a part of. This most heavenly place I like to call the bathroom.[/COLOR]


I think it was better when you had to scroll for a couple of minutes to read it all in that small IM window :animesigh. Looking back, man I was weird in 8th grade.
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[quote name='MistressRoxie][color=#9933ff']And do us all a favor, and don't pretend like you don't have cool away messages. Because I know that, in fact, you actually do. :p [/color][/quote]Yeah, as much as I'd like to pretend I do have an away message...I don't. About the only thing I've bothered with is a picture. So in fact, I do not have an away message. Because it never occurred to me to add one. And honestly, other than to chat with a few people I don't give much thought to messing with how it looks or what sayings it has. lol
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[font=arial][size=1]All my away messages are quotes from my conversations with DeadSeraphim. True story!

"[18:58] ______________: With the speed and grace of a rampaging rhinoceros, I steal your left arm and make a burger out of it"

"[22:54] ______________: KEVIN
[22:54] ______________: GO TO BED RIGHT NOW OR THE ANAL MONKEYS WILL GET YOU
[22:54] CalmsongNC: ...>_>
[22:55] ______________: and by get you, i mean give you presents"

"[01:59] ______________: So then I, said, "John, please, Kevin is a Terminator 1000. Shotgun shells to the face just reform all gooey like." Then we played Nintendo for three days."

etc.

And one is always up, even if I'm here.[/font][/size]
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[color=deeppink]All my regular away messages are song quotes. Sometimes they'll be specific; for instance, when I'm watching House my away message is "House." Also, when I'm sick or something, I'm usually begging for pity via away messages.

Although there is this one, which I enjoy immenesly.

"The hill are alive with the sound of music, and it is [i]seriously[/i] creeping me out."[/color]
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[SIZE=1] My current one for msn and aim, has something to do with the next single off of A Weekend In The City, and the song: Hunting For Witches.

"Hey, I'm Hunting For Witches In The City... I Won't Be Back Until 09July07, But For Now Just Leave Me A Message."

but if I'm using a third party app to use msn messenger or aim, it just reverts to the default, "I'm online, but I maybe away from the computer" message.[/Size]
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I think mine is along the lines of "Sorry, I'm away from the screen right now, maybe because my eyes are bleeding or because I sat on a porcupine!"

Oh, and for a while it was "Hi, this is Matt's computer. He's not here right now so I will now proceed to chat you up sexfully in his place."

That one didn't work so well because it couldn't continue to chat up - it just repeated that one line every time they replied.
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[color=#9933ff][font=lucida calligraphy] I have a few various away messages, all of them are at home on my mom's computer so I have to remember them off the top of my head. Here are the ones that I'm sure I still have:

[b]AIM[/b]

Okay so you're sitting there trying to IM me and I'm not replying. There are a three reasons for that 1.) I don't like you 2.) I'm not here or 3.) I'm here and I don't like you.

I'm at work right now making money and explaining to people why I have to go to the bathroom (That was actually relevant at one poing)

They say beauty has the power to excite men, but so does a box of doughnuts... hmm beauty or doughnuts?

[b]YIM[/b]

They say that people who complain live longer. This could be because the people who have to listen to them die sooner, but who's to say?

Sailor Senshi are like cockroaches. Even when you think you've killed them they just pop back up again next season. (Yeah, not really an away message, but I have it up to piss off a friend of mine.)

Foraging.


Yeah I know, not the funniest and some of them aren't even nice or my own, but it's all I have.[/color][/font]
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[FONT=Arial]Right now my away message is a simple "RAWR." I used to have a ton of them but I don't really remember what any of them said. Haha.

One I put up a while ago said "You wanna know what's behind that door? You don't wanna know what's behind that door." Because I love Courage the Cowardly Dog.[/FONT]
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[COLOR=#DAA520][quote name='MistressRoxie][color=#9933ff']And do us all a favor, and don't pretend like you don't have cool away messages. Because I know that, in fact, you actually do. :p [/color][/quote]:p It's no pretense. I've never bothered to set any messages let alone an away one. I'm rarely on since I prefer to play with my dog, read or play video games in my spare time. So if I'm going to be 'away' I simply log off. lol[/COLOR]
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[color=#9933ff]Aaryanna - hey, at least you get offline when you're going to go do something, lol. I really don't understand why people will leave themselves on their instant messenger for DAYS... when they're not there, lol. Can anyone (perhaps someone who does that) explain?

I love all your away messages, though. They're great - keep 'em comin'. [/color]
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[color=#9933ff][font=lucida calligraphy]I just got home a little while ago and now I found some more of my away messages...

[b]YIM[/b]

I got really bored and left... or I'm at work. Oh who knows and who cares. But of you want call the cell. Just don't expect an answer.

If homosexuality is a disease, then I say we all just call in queer to work. You know keep calling in and saying: Sorry Can't come into work again, still queer.


I went to go find myself. If I arrive before I get back please keep me here for observation.

[b]AIM[/b]

I can't think of all of them, but I did have one about being out with my daughter that I think went something like this:

Hey. I'm not here right now, Abby woke up from her nap so I decided to take her out for a bit. If you have my number, call the cell. If not, leave a message here. TTFN


But other times I do like Aaryanna and turn the computer off. If I don't my boyfriend gets confused by my offline messages and still thinks I'm online.[/color][/font]
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[COLOR=#DAA520]Well here's another person who doesn't have an away message. Since to be honest, like Rach and Aaryanna, it never occurred to me. Since when I'm away, my computer is off. Or I sign out of MSN Messenger. About the only thing I've toyed with is the picture and color of the font.

I've noticed how people change their sayings on a regular basis, but I've never given it much thought. lol And I guess a number of my friends are the same way since over half of my contacts don't have a message either.

Though I would have to say that the funniest one out of those on my list of contacts who actually do have a saying is the one by BKstyles, his current one of: [I]Your lord and master [/I]Cracks me up. ^_~ I suppose one of these days I ought to add a message. As well as checking out the other features available. [/COLOR]
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I have a long list of away messages on AIM. Let's look through them...

"Oops! Suminda has transformed into her Mime Form and can't talk at this moment!"

"Awww, you made Suminda cry! Don't worry--that means she's either very happy, proud, relieved, sad, etc."

"Oooh, you are in BIG trouble--you might have done something to offend Suminda. She went away to put a curse on you, a curse that will only be removed if you apologize and mean it..."

"Suminda is meditating now and doesn't want anyone bothering her."

"Suminda's gone away to pray for you! Just sit back and enjoy the blessing..."

"Suminda's having one of her special spirit talks! If you listen carefully, you might catch some of her wisdom..."

Obviously I use different ones for different occasions. Suminda is my pen name.
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[color=#9933ff][font=lucida calligraphy] I have some new ones for my AIM account, they are as follows"

Off foraging. Back in a few... unless I have to kill something then it may take a while longer.

Hey everyone! I'm writing right now. So I may not talk to you unless there's a lull in my creative process or I want you to see what I'm doing.

I'm currently off learning how to be a better Canadian citizen.

The last one is probably the oddest because I'm not Canadian, I'm American. I just happen to have a lot of Canadian friends... one of which has a mom who has offered to sponsor me if I decide to move to Canada.[/color][/font]
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