RPG FQFG2: Counter-Terrorism Unit

[Shy]

[b]"Grape Ape!"[/b] Ploppy the Spaceship shouted from his chair at the Command Center, [b]"We have a visitor.[/b]

[b]"Oh? Show me this intruder on the monitors."[/b] I said with a grin.

Ploppy made a few simple keystrokes and soon the large video monitors in the Command Center showed Peacock in a heated discussion with a filthy, and undoubtedly smelly terrorist. I instantly recognized the face, Rai Al Haswiri, one of the most dangerous members in the Terrorist Cell. If they had sent him alone to our base, I was certain the last thing they wanted to do was negotiate.

[b]"The bombs will be detonated any moment,"[/b] I sighed, [b]"This is merely a distraction."[/b]

[b]"You think so?"[/b]

[b]"That I do, Ploppy the Spaceship. I'll make my way over to Rai Al Hawsiri and listen to his demands. Call for the others. This may get serious..."[/b]

[Engel]

[color=crimson][size=1][i]Dirty rotten bastards...bloody can't take me prisoner, then expect me to work for 'em. Neva' heard of the term, "cruel and unusual punishment", I guess.[/i] I closed my eyes and sighed, my head pounding like a gavel on a wood block.

[b]"Can I get an asprin, or is that against prisoner rights in here?"[/b] I yelled, more than annoyed. When were my comrades going to arrive? Or did they leave me here to rot while they pushed forwards in their attacks? Snorting, I spat on the wall and stood up, leaning against the opposite wall.

[b]"So I guess that's a no on the asprin?"[/b] Rambling on to no one but myself, I rubbed my head and sighed.[/color][/size]

[Ezekiel]

[SIZE=1][I]Curse these Jenova Witnesses. [/I]

The muffled sound of voices came through the monitors, but there was no mistaking the phrase 'Church of One Winged Angel'. [I]Hethens, the lot of them![/I]

I knew Grape Ape and Peacock would be more than capable of handling that one nuisance, and I wasn't keen on having another run-in with Al Haswiri after last time. I was about to make my way to the prisoner's cell to interrogate him further when an intercom nestled in the ceiling crackled to life. It was Ploppy, and we were needed.

I growled into the mic pinned to my collar and brushed hair off my face, "[B]Gurt is on the way, sir[/B]."[/SIZE]

[Nerdsy]

[color=deeppink][b]Attention, CTU. We have a guest; the dirty terrorist Al Haswiri has come to negotiate the release of our prisoner. Everyone is to report to the lobby. You know, the one with the dramatic posters.[/b]

I shut off the intercom and leaned back in my chair, admiring the view my monitors provided. There was scarcely a nook that was out of my sight, to say nothing of the crannies.

Grape Ape's suspicions had put me on guard; I was a hawk, searching for my prey among the grasses. I made sure that my largest monitor was focused on our prisoner. I watched in disgust as he spit on the wall, and proceeded to lean on the very spot where he spat.

[i]Is the cell to clean for him?"[/i] I thought to myself, nauseated. [i]Can he not go a minute without making himself filthier?[/i][/color]

[Raiha]

[font=times][COLOR=DarkOrchid][i]Finally, the annoying Capitalist overlords were scurrying to answer my demands...[/i]

"Oh praise Hojo...for he's great...almost as great as Lord Sephiroth...

[i]Peacock gave me a vengeful glare. At the mention of Lord Sephiroth, our savior and deliverer, he blanched visibly. Not that I blame him. Sephiroth the Destroyer had wreaked more havoc on the Infidels than I could tell you about here. I grinned at the guards's annoyed faces and straightened my headscarf.[/i]

"Soon Jenova will be here for your souls..."

[i]I smiled at The Grape Ape's approach and waved a hand in a mock greeting. As he approached, I decided that friendly greetings would be stupid and snapped.[/i]

"Release Engel into my custody and in exchange you'll be told the location of one of our freedom suitcases..."[/COLOR][/font]

[Aaryanna_Mom]

[quote name='Nerdsy][color=deeppink']The terrorist's first move has been brilliantly countered, if I say so myself. We should not let our guards down, though; the rest of the terrorists are sure to be sneakier than 2007Suckitalboy. Despite their smell.[/color][/quote]It seems that [B]2007DigitalBoy [/B]has changed their user name to[B] Nonentity[/B]. Though their spamming efforts are still equally as obvious. ;) Also...*tosses [B]Engel[/B] an aspirin* Quit your whining youngster, you brought this on yourself by poor choices. *leaves*

[Engel]

[color=crimson][size=1][i]I wonder how I can take aspirin without water or something. I guess just swallow it.[/i] Putting the pill in my mouth, I swallowed quickly and glanced up at the giver of the headache reliever.

[b]"Thanks, Mother."[/b] I said with a half smirk to myself, though I was thankful. After a moment, I spoke again, even though she'd left. I turned my head up to the camera that surveyed my room. [b]"Tell me, what kind of choices do you think I've made? Haven't you ever wondered what it's like to stir up a little chaos, to press a button and watch people squirm in unpleasant nervousness and writhe uncomfortably? I mean, yeah, I can be a nice, sweet kind of person. But who doesn't want to strike back at the world when it hands you lemons and tells you to make...I dunno...Coke-cola?"[/b]

The aspirin would take a while to kick in. As long as I was a prisoner, I'd have time, though. No need to worry. Maybe someone would be coming to negotiate my release, and I could go back home and get some sleep. Obviously, they didn't plan on keeping me long, or just didn't care about their prisoners, as there was only hard concrete and metal bars around me.[/color][/size]

[Treble]

[font=Verdana][size=2][i]After disalarming a smelly bomb, Gadget wipes the dripping sweat off his shiny forehead.[/i][/size][/font]

[font=Verdana][size=2]?While I managed to disalarm one bomb so far, I know this will be a never ending battle with those stinkin terrorist.? Gadget thought to himself. [/size][/font]

[font=Verdana][size=2]Gadget reporting here, I?m on my way to the lobby room Ploppy![/size][/font]

[font=Verdana][size=2][i]Gadget dashes off to the lobby room.[/i][/size][/font]

[Japan]

[COLOR=DarkRed]Japan was busy reading her book Pilgrim's Progress when the call came over the intercom. Glancing up she sighed. Smoothing her black skirt as she got up from her cushioned window seat, she removed her reading glasses and set them next to her closed book on the seat.

[I]What have those terrorists done now?[/I] She thought to herself. With that she left her room and closed the door, her long brown hair flowing behind her. [/COLOR]

[Wondershot]

Far-fetched though it may be, Webster begins to realize that there is a chance that his everlasting verbiage and tetra-lingual tendencies (and an almost alarming attraction to alliteration) may end up being useful to the efforts put forth by the OBCTU. Perhaps his pervasive penchant for perusing the pressured psyche of their political prisoner was perceived as pointless, but the possibility of producing precious information persuades Webster to remain proactive as he proceeds on his present path to the prison, punctual as ever.

"Oh come on, I've never even seen the movie I'm referring to." The voice within his cerebrum mutters.

Webster halts abruptly at the sight of his comrade, Mother, handing the incarcerated terrorist an aspirin capsule. He watches Mother leave and then patiently waits for Engel to begin his soliloquy, right on schedule. Webster gathers that someday, Engel might let something slip to the cameras that might prove useful. However, the scheduled interrogation will have to suffer a delay, as a public address was now being given to convene at the lobby, which Webster now frets about being tardy for.

[Shy]

I entered the lobby and took a moment to admire the dramatic posters on the walls, purposely slighting Ra al Hawsiri in the proccess. Each poster was prouder and more patriotic than the last, preaching powerful slogans such as "Liberty over death!" and "Terrorists smell!"

[b]"I demand your attention, infidel!"[/b] the Terrorist shrieked, waving his hands in the air wildly. [b]"I have traveled very far to negotiate for Engel's trade."[/b]

I thought about this for a moment, and laughed to myself.

[b]"You have little to negotiate with, spammer,"[/b] I said confidently, [b]"We have the prisoner..."[/b]

[b]"--And we have the bombs!"[/b]

There was an uncomfortable moment of silence, punctuated by the sound of footsteps coming at us from all directions. Was I in store for an ambush?

In an instant the room filled with my subordinates, each armed and ready to take down the intruder.

[b]"We're here, Grape Ape!"[/b] Gadget shouted from behind the crowd of CTU agents.

Rai was noticably frightened by this new development, but I knew better than to underestimate the man who had an army of lightly-clothed, and powerful sorceress assassins at his disposal.

[b]"You'll find that escape is impossible, Hawsurry."[/b]

[b]"Hawsiri."[/b]

[b]"Sure,"[/b] I replied dryly, [b]My agents have an unusual list of demands, meant to humiliate and disorient your terrorists..."[/b]

[b]"Not that they need any help!"[/b] Peacock chimed in.

[b]"Oh snap!"[/b] Ploppy the Spaceship said over the intercom system.

Surely the Terrorists had met their match.

[Raiha]

[COLOR=DarkOrchid][font=times][i]I was laughing up my sleeve the entire time, and not because I was imagining Peacock as a peacock, or the Grape Ape hopping around the courtyard, flinging his own smelly nonsense at his comrades.[/i]

"Your feeble slights aside, I'd like to see Engel out here for myself. To make sure you infidels haven't done any permanent damage to him. ...I hear your famous Mother is a world class poisoner."

[i]I narrowed my eyes at the fluffy and spit-shined "counter terrorists." They were both evil and and irritating in public. They were like sheep really. I laughed at them all and hooked my thumbs through the belt that normally held lots and lots of ammunition.[/i]

"You're not in a real position to make demands you know."

[i]The Grape Ape's tone of voice was irritating, but not surprising. It wasn't like he was really concerned with the lives of thousands of other morons like him.[/i]

"Then we'll detonate a few of our fun-filled suitcases and sit back and watch, while you'll be known as the guy who was so proud of himself that he couldn't release a freedom fighter to prevent it all."

[i]I smirked, crossing my arms instead, laughing in the face of the scowling and idealistic ones.[/i]

"It'll be such an honor for them to all go to the Lifestream at the same time...[/font][/COLOR]

[Aberinkula]

[B][COLOR=Black]
I remembered looking at the purple abomination. He was trully more hideous than I imagined. He was wearing this classy hat, which as we all know, was out dated in it's time.It sickens me to seethat man's purpe face. I turned on my intercom link.[I] "We should have reinforcemens you know! Only me and Rai Al haswiri are here! I need backup... and quick!"[/I]

I jolted forth, I needed to find engel. But what could I negotiate? I have yet to decide...[/COLOR][/B]

[COLOR=Black][B]As I got closer to Engels location I saw Rai. He was chatting with the CTU bastards. I wanted to talk to him, but I had a mission. As I turned around I saw one of the agents... I knew then and there that I was screwed.[/B][/COLOR]

[Wondershot]

"Curiouser and curiouser..."

Webster, faced with this new intruder before him, swiftly draws his sidearm and aims it carefully at the target's head. Unfortunately, the antique Webley revolver is, in actuality, a painted-over cap gun, rather ingeniously designed to resemble the genuine article.

Of course, the intruder has no reason to know that.

"I have reason to believe that you have ambled your way down this corridor in error, and found yourself at a rather precarious precipice." Webster begins, hand tightening on the handle of the Webley doppelganger.

"You seem to be on an assignment of some sort, and I gather than the nature of your less-than-stellar infiltration of our headquarters is to acquire and extract our detainee. I am afraid, however, that your presence on the premises is strictly prohibited, and, as a threat to our organization and the safety of the OtakuBoards at large, I will have to detain you myself to prevent further calamity."

The malevolent, maladroit terrorist muses over this for but a moment, before mumbling a response which Webster fails to comprehend.

"I apologize, but I cannot decipher your speech at that volume." Webster begins slowly, approaching the so-called "freedom fighter".

"I would have to ask you, for the purpose of clarity, to speak using proper enunciation in the future. If this is not possible in English, I may accommodate in French or Portuguese as well. My Spanish is still not refined enough to warrant any attempts at advanced communication. However, what I would like to know is whether or not you were the one who set up us the bomb."

Webster stops short of his target, a solitary bead of sweat rolls down his forehead unceremoniously.

"Pardon me, that was uncalled for."

Webster continues, then ceases his advance but a metre from his adversary, keeping the Webley at arm's length with its iron sights trained on the insurgent's forehead.

"Now then, are you prepared to surrender peacefully?"

[Nerdsy]

[color=deeppink][b]Oh snap![/b]

I grinned broadly, basking in the humongous burn that I had just bore witness to. As I surveyed my domain, I reflected on the most recent terrorist attacks; they were less than impressive. Only two terrorists of note were involved with today's attacks; and they were only of note because of how ludicrous their methods are.

The first was severely misguided. While attempting to derail several conversations, he did so in a way that actually added to them. It was the equivalent to trying to stick it to the man by helping an old lady across the street; clearly he did not understand his craft.

The second, while a considerably better spammer, has taken it upon himself to remove any of his incidents as soon as they are discovered. While I must say it is has resulted in a few embarrassments, he fails to realize that he is doing our work for us.

Their latest smear campaign has also been disappointing; they have leveled accusations of "baby talk" and "uncleverness" against this fine organization. Missing the point, as always. We do not call them "smelly" because we are trying to be clever; we are merely trying to give word to the putrid assault on our olfactory senses that we experience every time we deal with these animals.

A flash from the corner monitor broke me out of my trance. [i]Damn it! How'd I miss him?[/i] I thought. I recognized the flash instantly; a member of the terrorist cell responsible for some of the recent attacks. [i]Clearly he's better at stealth than he is at terrorizing.[/i]

I switch the mike from the intercom to the communicators; I can't have the terrorists know I'm on to them.

[b]Attention all units! Attention all units! Haswanana is a diversion! We have an intruder, and he is heading for Engel's cell! I repeat, he is heading for Engel's cell!
[/b][/color]

[Aaryanna_Mom]

[quote name='Nerdsy][color=deeppink][b]Attention all units! Attention all units! Haswanana is a diversion! We have an intruder, and he is heading for Engel's cell! I repeat, he is heading for Engel's cell![/b'][/color][/quote]Mother heard the announcement on the communicator from her position of being in [B]Grape Ape's[/B] main office. She had been moving to join the others who were confronting [B]Haswanana[/B] who was attempting to secure the release of [B]Engel[/B], but on her way she remembered that the plants needed to be watered. Naturally she stopped to do it. But now it seemed that someone had sneaked into the facility and was heading for the cell where [B]Engel [/B]was being kept. [I]I think not! [/I]She thought even as she set the watering can down and opened the door to head back to the cell.

At the end of the hallway, moving away from her was [B]Nonentity[/B], preparing to head around the corner. Obviously the spam attacks by [B]I'm Not Nomura[/B] and [B]Premonition[/B] were but a diversion. Just as the negotiations by[B] Haswanana [/B]were as well. Both of them a tactic to lure members away from the part of the facility where the cell was so that[B] Nonentity[/B] could sneak in. Quickly she picked up the watering can and chucked it, nailing him in the back of his head. Even as she hurried down the corridor to nab him.

"[B]OW![/B]" He yelled as he turned to see who it was. Reaching up with both hands to grab where the can had hit him. "[B]What the hell was that for...Damn![/B]"

He moved to escape but Mother didn't give him a chance grabbing him by the scruff of his shirt. Pulling back a bit at the smell. [I]Someone needs to teach these terrorists what a bath is. [/I] She thought with disgust. Then an idea hit her. With a smile she dragged him like the naughty child he was to the huge window at the end of the hallway.

"[B]What are you doing? This is the third floor![/B]"[B] Nonentity[/B] yelled in panic as she opened the window

"[B]Teaching you to take a bath![/B]" Mother replied as she shoved him out the window and into the huge pond in the garden below. "[B]Don't come back until you've taken one![/B]" Then she slammed the window shut and went to get something to get rid of the smell.

"[B]Damn if those terrorists don't stink![/B]" She said to herself.

[2010DigitalBoy]

What Mother thought she saw was me crashing into the pond, but honestly, how could she have seen that which never existed? Your mind is faltering with age, old woman :p

[Ezekiel]

[SIZE=1]I jumped at the sudden outcry from the intercom, no more than a few minutes away from the rest of the agents. So they were going to try and break him out, were they? I shouldn't be surprised, [B]Haswiri[/B] was probably the only intelligent one out of their lot and he couldn't hold off all of us at once with words alone.

I turned and slipped into a side corridor, jogging down some stairs to reach the prisons below. I felt my ears prickle slightly as though someone was talking about me. How rude.

I frowned as I heard [B]Mother[/B]'s delighted laughter followed by a clearly audible splash from below. Wondering what poor sod had fallen into her disciplining hands I walked a little faster. She wasn't above pulling at my ears, even if I was on her side.

As a turned the corner I walked into something small and insignificant. [B]"Gah, who--?"[/B]

[I]Terrorist![/I]

From the files I had seen it was the one called [B]Premonition[/B]. They were heading down the row of cells to try and find [B]Engel'[/B]s, clearly. Too bad for them they'd run into me first.

I whipped out a weapon I'd had strapped to my belt, grinning as the end of it surged with electricity. [B]"Want to try out some of this mod-rod, little terrorist?"[/B][/SIZE]

[2010DigitalBoy]

[B]"Erm, i think he's seen enough action this evening,"[/B] Nonentity suddenly annnounced, moulding into existence just in fron of Premonition. Prem wondered why his clothes were wet.

[B]"Look out Non, I can take him!" [/B] Prem hollered.

[B]"With what? You're not wearing your bomb shoes and there's nothing strapped to your belt. Don't forget to suit up next time,"[/B] And with that, Non took Prem's hand and zapped them both away. At first the CTU bastard who attacked them was smiling, thinking of how they had run away. But then it suddenly occured to him...

[I]Wait... they're wearing bomb shoes?![/I]

[Engel]

[color=crimson][size=1]I was at just the vantage point to see the confrontation of [b]Ezekiel[/b] and [b]Premonition.[/b] I sighed and leaned against the bars, calling out to [b]Ezekiel[/b] tauntingly.

[b]"C'mon, Zeke. Don't you remember when we used to be pretty good friends? Before all this? And then you're not willing to let them take me? You don't even understand our cause. We're trying to make the world a more fun place, and not so...army-like, not so strict. Let me go, and I'll not harm anyone. You know I could kick your arseif I wanted to, even if you have that Mod-Rod in your hands,"[/b] I paused for a moment, and grinned wolfishly. [b]"But the bars are stopping me from doing that for now. It's not like I want to hurt a former friend anyway."[/b]

Hooking my hands around the bars, I began to lean back, and just when I'd start to fall over, pull myself back. I'd always had an urge to keep moving at all times. Being locked up in a cell with a fellow Freedom Fighter and a scallywag "Counter-Terrorist" outside didn't change that fact.[/color][/size]

[Allamorph]

[FONT=Arial]Before the Grape Ape could shoot down the latest attempted witticism of the terrorist in front of him, his earpiece crackled to life.

[I]G.A., Shades. We have a foothold scenario near the prisoner's cell. The threat level is low, but it could potentially escalate to dangerous levels of lunacy.

I am in position and have line of sight. Orders, sir ? wait, strike that. Intruders are away. Shall I attempt to locate?[/I][/FONT]

[Shy]

I sighed as two Terrorists, Nonsequiter and Premature, I think, came charging down the hallway towards Engel's cell. While Rai al Haswiri had a thick and dirty beard, I could see traces of a smile underneath.

[b]"Release the prisoner, or we will detonate the bombs.[/b]" He commanded.

[b]"Doubtful,"[/b] I said as I reached into my pocket for a stick of gum. Gadget stepped towards Rai cautiously.

[b]"We're on communications lockdown with the outside world. If you try to detonate those weapons, I doubt the signal is going to carry much further than this room... [i]if[/i] you have the power to detonate the weapons in the first place."[/b]

Rai wiped the sweat from his brow and revealed a remote control device from his robe.

[b]"Would you care to try me, capitalist pig?[/b]

[b]"Oh I'd love to! But I don't think you want to do that... we can trace the signal of your detonation device, and follow the trail right to these bombs of yours."[/b]

[b]"If you want to negotiate, let's negotiate,"[/b] I said, [b]"But first, as a sign of goodwill, get your comrades out of our base."[/b]

[b]"Their ugly boots are scuffing up our floors, and our cleaning lady doesn't come in until Thursday."[/b] Peacock added.

[Sandy]

Peacock got fed up by all these sudden pointless attacks from the terrorists, and decided that it was time to do some renovating to appease his demanding aesthetic eye.

His first order of business was to order a small army of hunky workmen to move their base - as well as the terrorists' base - from the dusty Underground up to a bustling square.

[B]"Hmm"[/B], he pondered afterwards. [B]"Now that we have actual windows, I'm wondering what type of curtains would go well with this world-saving theme of ours?"[/B]

[Raiha]

[COLOR=DarkOrchid][font=times][i]I shouted a few words at my two underlings and they slunk off into the background back to the SECRET base. Meanwhile Peacock was examining the bare windows and I leaned over his shoulder.[/i]

"Go with red, it'll bring out the color of your spleen."

[i]He whipped around furiously and I grinned, showing him my charmingly opaque teeth. I like to think they match my scarf. I then turned, and surveyed the room, now free of my two underlings. Grape Ape was massaging his temples in a very Hitler like fashion...[/i]

"Sorry, they're Bin Laden's wife's cousins. I'm obliged to let them come out of their cages every now and then."

"Ah, I can understand that..."

"You have no idea-"

[i]The Grape Ape gestured and his plushie wielding underlings brought forward a card table and two folding chairs.[/i]

"Shall we?"[/font][/COLOR]

[Shy]

Fortunately I had been preapred for just such an occasion. Birmingham had purchased the chairs from a local discount store earlier that week; thank goodness for a free-market economy. I was sure that if the situation were reversed, the Terrorists would probably have made us sit on rocks or second-class citizens.

I motioned for Po to bring me the list of demands we had compiled together. When we captured Engel earlier in the week we suspected that they would attempt to retrieve him through diplomacy. With a few notable exceptions, the Terrorists were out-gunned in nearly every way possible. Especially when it came to hygiene.

Rai tapped his sandals against the ground impatiently as I read the list of demands to myself, admiring how clever I thought we were.

[b]"Demand Number One: We would like your leader to change his title from 'The Ambassador of TERRORISM' to 'The Ambassador of [i]Counter[/i]-Terrorism' for the rest of the war."[/b]

The Terorrist raised his thick unibrow in suspicion.

[b]"Demand Number Two: Reveal the locations of at least [i]two[/i] suitcase nukes. Engel will be freed once we verify that these locations are accurate, and that you aren't trying to trick us."[/b]

[b]"How could we possibly trick the all-knowing Counter-Terrorism Unit?"[/b] Rai said as he rolled his eyes.

[b]"Look out, Grape Ape!"[/b] Japan shouted from behind, [b]"He's using sarcasm!"[/b]

[b]"Um... good... call... Japan..."[/b]

Rai thought for a moment before speaking.

[b]"While I disagree with the economic slavery you impose on your people, I do find these demands somewhat reasonable. Do you have a telephone? I would like to discuss this with my superior."[/b]

I looked at my watch, and the time of the Terrorist's first strike was drawing ever closer. This was yet another clever distraction, hoping to keep us occupied while they planted suitcase nukes across the boards.

[b]"No."[/b] I said, [b]"We have two final demands for the prisoner's return. We know how valuable it is that you return him to your base before he gives away any information about the bombs' locations."[/b]

The man shook his fists in anger, and began to vomit out several un-patriotic and terroristic phrases in response. While I couldn't understand many of them under his thick accent, I knew it was in our best interest to keep these Terrorists away from our pets and sisters.

[b]"The first of our final demands is that you agree never to let any of these 'Junior Insurgents' into our base again. If we have another rude interruption, expect the full force of the OtakuBoards' Counter-Terrorism Unit behind our retaliation..."[/b]

He nodded slowly.

[b]"And my final request is a most unusual one,"[/b] I said as I signaled for my counterparts leaning against the wall, [b]I'd prefer that they explain it to you personally."[/b]